Wow, I'm a little surprised, to say the least; fifteen reviews—a full page—is one heck of a lot of reviews to me, and I was definitely surprised when I had fifteen new review alerts when I came home from school today…lol.
Inuyasha: Don't worry, I'm not gonna end the story yet—if my current plans hold up, I'm not even a third of the way through (I'm trying to break 100,000 words with my first fan-fiction…kind of ambitious, but hey—I've never been one to not try), so you don't have to worry about it ending anytime soon. Sorry to both you and anyone else who got the impression the story's ending: surprise surprise, it's not!
BurningBritelyOne: Heh heh heh…Naraku will enter the story at some point, I guarantee that; as for new detachments, I'm not sure: I may, if I can think up any good ideas for demons, but like I said, I don't know. Naraku, however, will enter the storyline soon, however: I've got the plot all laid out for that, I just don't want to do it too soon because that would cut the story short by one heck of a lot (if I decided to do it now, you guys would get, at most, four more chapters…heh).
::Camera pans over to me beating Kouga over the head with a frying pan::
::Looks up, tries to hide frying pan:: I don't own Inuyasha, now go away!
Chapter Twenty
In a remote portion of the forest, Inuyasha now resided; head upon his knees, Tetsuaiga clutched in a white-knuckled grip as he strove to fight off the flood of memories that were welling up inside his mind; silence weighed as heavily upon the ears as a waterfall, thought pervaded every corner of this section of the forest: far-off…remote…desolate.
'Desolate…' Inuyasha murmured in his mind, warm sunlight warming his body but not his heart as he realized that's just how he felt. 'Cold, alone, and desolate...well, this is always what I wanted, right? Pushing others away from me, warding humanity from my heart; sanctioning myself off from human emotion…well, here I am. Wonderful, isn't it?'
He heard a crashing sound tearing through the forest as the one person he didn't want to see right now came running towards him, searching for him as desperately as he wanted to be left alone; he could hear her voice—her sweet, emotion-filled voice—ring out as she called his name.
"Inuyasha? Where are you, Inuyasha!?"
Her voice was tearing him in half: he ached to stay, be bathed in her warmth and comfort, knowing everything would be alright; at the same time, he longed to leave, knowing she'd be safe from the monstrosity he could change into at any moment, keeping her away from the wound he'd inflicted inside himself.
His indecision lasted long enough for Kagome to burst into the clearing and notice the hanyou in the tree, hand still clasped around the sheathed Tetsuaiga as to ward off impending doom.
"Inuyasha, why didn't you…" she started, but Inuyasha snipped her voice off cleanly as he snapped,
"Why did you come after me? I told you to stay at the camp site, didn't I?"
Kagome was taken aback for a moment, but the call of Inuyasha's need was too strong for her petty anger as she spoke back,
"First off, you were injured by Kouga. I don't care if it heals before I can do anything about it, it's better that I try than just sit back and let it go untreated. Second off, there's something else wrong with you, something worse that you're not going to tell me about, but it's just like your injuries: I can't sit back and leave it untended, now can I?"
With a swift, sudden motion, Inuyasha cast off his yukata and undershirt, exposing a flawless chest and back as his eerily calm voice, permeated with nothing but the cool chill he was now feeling in his heart, resounded once more.
"There, I'm fine; you can go back to the camp now and leave me be."
"Inuyasha, I don't care if you think you're not going to tell me: I'm not leaving this clearing until you tell me what's going on."
"Don't leave, then; but I will."
He stood up on the tree limb, balancing with a fluid grace as he stepped out to the end of the bough. Leg muscles tensed as he fired himself from the tree, leaves whipping across his face as he began his surge through the canopy, wind whistling through…
"Osuwari!" Kagome called, trying to stop him before he got too far away as the spell's effect took hold; branches and leaves were ripped down along with Inuyasha as he plummeted from twenty feet up in the air, pain suffusing his body as he slammed into the ground—he welcomed the pain, welcomed the helplessness as he lay there, pinned by the spell. It was a small retribution—what was being sat compared to what he had almost done to Kagome? What was physical pain in comparison to the pain he had nearly slain Kagome's heart with when he didn't recognize her?
Not even bothering to mutter curse words in his mind, he stood up; dusting his yukata off, he prepared for another leap even as a second, "Osuwari!" was shouted out behind him, plunging him back into the hole that he had made before, yet it was to no avail: Inuyasha stayed cold, impassive, even as Kagome drew nearer, uttering a third, "Osuwari!" as the stubborn hanyou refused to budge.
"Why won't you let me help you?" Kagome asked, voice a searing knife cutting him in two as she posed a simple question, kneeling next to Inuyasha as she lifted his face to stare into her eyes; cold amber met soft blue as Inuyasha jerked away and responded,
"Because I don't need help," Inuyasha spat out, dragging himself up and attempting to leave once more, only to be sat by Kagome as she cried,
"What do you mean you don't need help!? I can see it in your eyes you need help—they're cold, dead, hollow: not the eyes of the Inuyasha I kissed, baka!"
Her shot had hit home, and she and Inuyasha both do it; but for both of them, it's the prerogative of the wounded to grow angry when their wound is further inflamed, such was Inuyasha's anger, smoldering in his heart, in his eyes, as he roared at Kagome.
"You're right! You know what—you're right, okay!? This isn't the Inuyasha you kissed, this is the real me, the me that Fate's had planned for me since before I was born—cold, alone, never needing anybody, never needing anything, because to try to get it would just be pain!" His heart felt like it was going to explode, tears tried to force their way out but couldn't get past the blocks his life had set up. "That's why we started this quest, remember!? This whole goddamned, half-brained, stupid quest! We started it so I could get the Shikon no Tama and wish myself demon, so I wouldn't have to feel—to care—to…"
SMACK!
A blistering handprint scorched its way onto Inuyasha's face as Kagome's hand swept tracks across his face; both blinked in surprise for a second as Kagome looked down at her hand, numb from hitting his rock-hard face, then anger reigned once more as she burst out,
"Don't make excuses: that's not why you're acting this way at all, you and I both know that! Now why don't you stop this selfish crap that I've been hearing since the day I unsealed you and tell me why you're ignoring me when all I'm trying to do is help you!?" He didn't respond, anger falling from his face as he stood there, insides warring with each other in an all-too-familiar struggle—one the had become even more common after that one kiss; that one, shining, beautiful kiss he should have never given; a kiss that had tormented him, plagued his dreams; haunted his thoughts…
"Well!?" Kagome shouted, sticking her face in his as he still didn't answer.
"Kagome…," Inuyasha said, a voice that mirrored the one he had use when he had held Kagome tight, seconds before he cast her into the well. "Why do you stay around me when I treat you how I do?"
Kagome started to say something, them settled for a surprised, "Huh?" as she blinked stupidly at him, taken aback by his sudden, completely abnormal question as he continued.
"Why do you stay around me when you know what I have, barely contained, inside me; when I could accidentally hurt you, kill you, as easily as any of my enemies?" he demanded, voice rising in power and passion as he shoved his own face into Kagome's. "Why in the world do you keep my company when we fight so often; when by all laws of human and youkai you should be pushing me away, just like I always do to you?"
Kagome sighed for a second, then said softly, "Because I don't care what you are, I don't care what you've done in the past; what I care about is what's in here," she breathed, tapping his chest lightly with the point of her finger. "It's the same way it's been ever since I met you, Inuyasha: you've kept me going; sometimes softly, mostly harshly, but you've kept me alive and feeling. It's like when I was trapped in that moth's cocoon, losing my humanity—just as you were with Kouga, but you kept it—the only thought that kept me going, kept me pushing through, was the knowledge that I had you, would always have you, to turn to. I care about you, Inuyasha: that's why I stay," she said, a small gasp escaping her lips as Inuyasha pulled her close, scent overpowering her as his face drew nearer…
…and he kissed her deeply; savoring her taste, her smell, her scent once more; yet another double-edged sword added to his painful memories, but not caring as he held her tight once more. Cold, hard eyes melted; brittle yellow fused and molded into warm brown as he looked into Kagome's eyes, the whole summation of his being told in two words as bliss was his once more:
"Arigatou, Kagome."
And there they stayed, lost in time and thought, until night found them huddled for warmth together under the silver moonlight.
Well, another angst/romance chapter…hope you enjoyed it! Gah, no time for any responses or anything right now, I've gotta get started on my math homework…as always, please read and review!
Jaa, mata ne!