After the smoke had cleared and the screams stopped, Lavender sat, twiddling her thumbs, on a bench, in the lobby. She sat, wondering about the past. There was a time, long ago, when she and Ron dated. Unlike most girls, she wasn't wondering why they broke up, (because honestly she couldn't remember and didn't want to try) she was wondering why Ron was so anxious to get Harry and Hermione together. She knew for a fact no death eaters set foot in whatever restaurant they were going to, so this could only be for some reason that Lavender couldn't pin point at this time. All she could think to do was help.

"Wait a tick..." She muttered, digging in her hand bag. She pulled open her lavender planner thumbed through the pages. "That dirty rotten CHEAT!" She screeched.

"That's a bit harsh to say about your planner." Hermione said beside her. "I mean you're the one who put things into it."

Lavender snapped it shut. "You know for being the brightest girl in the class, you're a bit dim."

Hermione laughed. "How does that work out?"

Lavender laughed too. "I guess it doesn't." She paused. "So how was your first photo shoot?"

"Horrible. Andre hated me, Skeeter got on my nerves, and the clothes..." Hermione sighed.

"You looked good enough to shag, Skeeter would provoke Gandhi into a smart slap, and André's like a kitten, he bits when he loves you." Lavender smiled sweetly.

Hermione rolled her eyes. "At least not all men are like kittens." She muttered.

"I bet you wouldn't care if Harry bit you." She said slyly.

"Lavender that's dirty."

She shrugged. "Like I care. Now you can hear a lot more of my dirty mind while we eat lunch. I know the best cafe in Estrogen Ally."

~~~~~~

"Ginny, is this really necessary?" Harry whined. He really had no right to. He had said anyone and Ginny did know quite a bit about Hermione, and so did Hermione's friends at the office, all fifteen of them. Besides, it wasn't Mad-eye.

"Harry, you've got to see this like we do. We're helping! We want you to succeed. Ron stop snickering." Ginny scolded. Ron looked like he was having the time of his life while Harry looked as though he would be sick. The women in the building, and a few men were in Ron's office, giving advice on how to woo Hermione while Ginny was transfiguring his trousers and shirt into a respectable suit.

"Now you want to bring flowers, no doubt, she'll like that." Someone from shipping said.

"I don't know, this is Hermione, why don't you bring her a book." Everyone chuckled.

"Ooh, bring her an engraved diary, girls like that." Colin offered.

"Very thoughtful Colin." Ginny smiled.

"Colin get out." Ron said flatly.

"Why?"

"Because."

Ginny caught Colin's eye and Colin winked. Ginny was casting a spell and when Colin winked she slipped and the trousers she was working on popped out of existence, reveling scarlet boxers with moving snitches.

"That answers one question." A woman from the mail room said loudly.

Harry turned a notable shade of red. Ron just sighed. "Ginny, I know you enjoy seeing Harry in his boxers, but was that really necessary?" Ginny scowled and made to make a reply, but Ron cut her off. "Why don't you get his trousers back and we'll go to a real store if this suit is so important." He turned to the assembled group. "Now why don't you all get back to work? That's why we're here, right? RIGHT? Go now!" He said. Everyone began milling around, taking their time, taking lingering glances at Harry's boxers. "Why don't we plat a game? It's called 'get out of Ron's office in five seconds or you all get pink slips' Five, four three," The last person got out and slammed the door.

"That was clever Cap'"

"Colin, TWO!"

"But Cap!"

"TWO AND A HALF!"

"Later Harry." Colin said quickly and shut the door.

~~~

Lavender had been right, it was a great cafe. All the waitresses were very talkative and tended to get into conversations. As Lavender had promised, she tried to teach Hermione how to flirt, lie, and "close the deal" as Lavender put it, though Hermione turned very red at that point and stopped listening.

Lavender had left to the powder room and when she returned, she found Hermione was the center of attention.

"Just be natural, guys like natural." The red-headed waitress said.

"Yes, but not too natural, you don't want him to think you're not feminine." The woman with glasses said knowingly.

"Though you can't be too feminine, he'll think you can't do a thing for yourself."

"But don't do everything yourself, that's even worse."

Hermione didn't know weather to take notes or yell at them to get out of her business. For now she just sat and nodded dumbly.

"So what's he like?" A voice asked from the crowd that had assembled.

"Oh he is wonderful. I've known him for quite a few years, that's why it's so hard."

A smooth "Aww" went through the crowd.

"He's really quite brave. He is always the most gallant. He laughs at people's jokes and smiles when people smile at him. He really is an all around nice guy, but I've seen him fierce too. He's defended me and kept my sprits up when I was low, but he's also fought for my life."

"What does he look like? He must be ugly, there are no nice handsome men anymore." A very nasal voice commented.

"No he's very handsome. He has dark hair that's so deep a black it's almost purple, and green eyes like emeralds."

"Sounds like the dream guy."

"Oh he is, that's what makes it so hard to go on this date. I may botch something and ruin all we have."

A sigh went through the crowd. Then someone piped up. "What's his name?"

Lavender began to sift through the crowd to get back to the table before she could answer it.

"Harry-"

"Stienman, Harry Stienman's his name."

"You're a lucky woman, from the sounds of it he looks almost like Harry Potter." one voice commented.

"Oh, Harry Potter is one full man." Another said.

"Oh Yeah, if I saw him right now I'd-"

"Hush Mary, there's children in the room."