Ch. 12
Filling Emptiness
"Shit! Is… Who was that? What was her name? Are you guys okay?" Ken spat out each question, leaving no time at all for any of them to be answered. The girl that had so painfully reminded him of Omi, tears lining her face, was gone. He'd missed her! He had fucking missed her. He'd never thought he'd see the day that a girl would outrun him. Yet… if he was right about who he thought it might be then… it was no girl who had outrun him and left him in the dust. Already just the thought made his heart beat too fast in anticipation. He was caught between excitement, happiness, and fear of being brutally disappointed. But as Yoji's pointed glare and hit to the head had so thoughtfully reminded him of what came first… Ken kneeled to Mika-chan, one of Omi's school friends who looked to say the least shocked and upset. Yui was right next to her, her usually serious face pale with her mouth wide open. Neither girl would say anything much to his exasperation except babble something incoherent. Turning to Shinchiro for answers, the brunette found that Ran was already there, his violet eyes ablaze with quiet hope and desperation. He strained to hear what the two were talking about through the cacophony the other girls created around them.
"…new girl… hai… she was adopted apparently… no she's fifteen. Her name is…"
"Ken-san! Isn't it just horrible?" A girl exclaimed in his ear, making him miss what the name of that girl was. If it circumstances had been normal, he wouldn't have minded but…
"EVERYBODY JUST LEAVE UNLESS YOU HAVE SOME BUSINESS!" He shouted, startling all the nearby girls into tears. Momoe-san even stopped rocking for a moment, her old wrinkled face mirroring Yoji's blank surprise look. He shook, so angry that he was.
What if it had been Omi? What if it had been Omi? He needed to know…
"Ano… girls. This isn't the time. We're going to close the shop now and escort Yui-chan, Mika-chan and Shinchiro back to their homes. They've had an awful scare and…" Yoji started off diplomatically, a flirty grin on his face as smoothed the ruffled feathers Ken had caused with his outbursts. Ken gritted his teeth. And then Ran passed by him, whispering something that made him freeze before an uncertain but real smile of relief broke onto his face.
"Her name is Ouka…"
…
Omi ran. He ran so hard that his legs were just numb from the pain, trembling as the muscles were over worked so suddenly without any warning or warming up. But he just ran, wanting to outrun all the memories and the blinding pain in his head that was causing his vision to blur--that were causing him to stumble and land painfully to his knees every so often. He almost sobbed in relief as he saw his… no… the house that he had started to think of as home.
He felt nauseous as he entered, blundering past his 'parents', knowing all of sudden what he had been hiding from them. Not only was he a boy but he was also an assassin. It wasn't just air that was stuck in his throat by now as he ignored their calls as he dashed up the stairs. It was bile as well that stayed in his throat. To know that he had touched them with his bloody hands, to know that he had endangered them with every minute he had stayed within their house… their love…
It had all been a lie.
He slammed into his door and rebounded, shocked before jumping back up and opening the door with a quick twist of his wrist.
Well the lie was over. The darkness in his mind was gone, leaving only shadows behind.
A sob erupted from his lips as he locked the door behind him. Omi let himself fall to the carpeted floor, shivering. He wished the pain would just disappear… god, how he wished…
It took a few minutes for him to start thinking coherently. Still he ignored the knocking on his door as he went instead to his computer, searching for a certain piece of information that could change everything, everything.
Maybe…maybe they hadn't forgotten about him. Maybe they had looked for him. Quickly, his memories still blurry and clouded with pain, Omi started to hack into Kritiker's mainframe, trying to get his file and that one mission file that had been the start of all this hell.
Wiping his eyes with the back of his left hand, he continued to type almost savagely until the windows that he had needed, wanted came popping up. Blue eyes scanning the words quickly, they stilled as they reached certain words that froze his insides.
They hadn't searched at all. The mission had been abandoned. The bad men were still loose, free…
A shiver ran through him as well as a taste of bitterness he had no idea he had possessed until now. Omi pushed himself away, the sobbing of his 'Okaa-san' finally getting through him. Biting his lip, he went to the door, leaning against it. Its cool surface strangely comforting on his hot cheek.
"Leave me alone…" He whispered.
"Ouka… Ouka, honey… tell us what's wrong. Please let us in… Please… baby…"
"I'm not Ouka! I'm not her!" He continued to whisper, a bit brokenly.
"Oh honey… we love you…" The words hurt, knowing how much he needed them…and how they weren't even meant for him. They were for Ouka… a pathetic, little bait that had taken over Omi rendering the real person into something even less than a shadow. He pushed himself away from the door.
"I'm not her!" He shouted this time, making sure that they heard. "I will never be her! Please just… GO!" Not waiting to see if they would leave him alone without actually seeing him first, Omi turned away, awkwardly searching for painkillers he had hidden in his room long ago, when he had tried fighting these migraines that would come and go with shadow memories. Finding the bottle, he tipped it into his open hand, taking two of the painkillers dry. Then with quick angry movements he started to shed his clothes. He needed dark clothes…
He needed his clothes.
He needed his weapons.
He had vowed to never ever let the bad men get away with their crimes unpunished. If Weiss had given up as well as giving him up… then it left him alone to take care of the bad men.
He pulled on some jeans, frowning at the feel of them, knowing how wrong they were on his small frame now. He threw a random t-shirt and then opened his bedroom window. Looking behind him one last time, Omi called out towards the door with all the emotion he couldn't keep hidden from them; "I'm sorry… for everything. Please… try to forget. I…" He couldn't finish the words. Taking a long breath, he started to climb onto the window frame instead, already his mind calculating the easiest way down. He needed to get his stuff. "…I love you." He leapt, scrambling down and onto the street where he started to run again, exactly the way he had come from.
In the meantime as luck would have it, the rest of Weiss was doing exactly what Yoji had promised. They were bringing the shocked girls and only boy back to their house, getting in return the address of Ouka's house. They were told though that they had to promise in giving them news. At least that was what they had ended up deciding upon since Yui had wanted to go with them to check on what seemed to be her new protégé.
With the promise that they would call with news though, Yui had quieted down and had allowed herself to be taken back to her house. Once the girls and boy were safe in their houses, not another minute was wasted and it was in Ran's baby car and Yoji's car that they roared onto the road, hoping against hope that the Ouka they would find was indeed Omi.
"Ne… did anyone think to call Manx?" Aya-chan asked, her eyes wide with excitement. Yoji shrugged after all of the members had looked at each other, the negative answer easily read in their eyes.
"We can do it after the celebration." No one said anything about what would happen if it was not Omi. Nobody dared… but each of them thought it, a personal demon they all needed to fight.
Wary, Omi made his way closer to the building, wondering exactly how he was going to enter it without being noticed by the other assassins. A cool and calm indifference had entered his body while he had been running. There was only one goal that was clear in his mind.
The bad men had to be stopped.
Nothing mattered until that goal was met. He saw the fire escape ladder and decided that would be the best route. He would have to take his chances. Climbing deftly, the boy made his way quite easily into what used to be his room. With quick glances around the room, he realized with a sharp pain that…that girl with the smile had been given his room. He was quick to be replaced then…
He swallowed, pushing the pain away.
There were things that needed to be done. Silently, he started to check the closet, the night table… trying to find where they had put his stuff, if indeed they had kept any of it. A box with his code name scribbled onto it was hidden underneath the bed. Pulling out, Omi was relieved to find his mission clothes and his darts. He grabbed what he needed and walked out of the room, into the hallway, his head cocked and his eyes intense as he listened for any sound. Surprised to hear none, he moved forward into the bathroom.
Once there, he changed as quickly as he could, frowning as a button got caught in his long hair. That would have to go. He searched the drawer for scissors and once he found one, he stood near the mirror for the first time taking in his appearance. A bit clumsily he ran the scissors in his hair, watching dispassionately as the blond locks dropped to the floor. He would have to clean it later.
Later.
He misjudged and the scissors cut him slightly in the cheek, a pearl of blood collecting where the skin had been nicked. Omi wiped it away, then dropped the scissors. Enough had been cut so that it wouldn't get in his face during the mission. That was all that he had needed. He bent down, scooping up the blond strands and flushing them down the toilet.
Again he listened for noise and wondered if they were even here at all.
Maybe…
Maybe not.
He had no way of truly knowing and he didn't want to get caught.
It was time for him to be on his way again.
Goodbye. He thought with a last tendril of sadness as he touched the wall. Goodbye.
A/N- This story is soon coming to an end. I'm so close and yet…its still a lot more chapters before this story ends. I hope you guys still enjoy it!!! Let me know.
Hugs to all the people who review and those who don't!!!