Written By Request: Gaslight
Two months of marriage. You wouldn't think you could lose touch with family and friends, hell with the outside world in two months. It wasn't the first time though, Elizabeth thought dejectedly. When Lucky returned from the dead her whole life became about him … finding him, helping him, convincing him that they were still in love, and pretending that everything was all right between them when it really wasn't.
Elizabeth sighed and spared a quick look around her house. She had tried very hard to make it home but it was difficult when the people who previously owned the house had chosen almost everything that now decorated it. Elizabeth detested the cream walls. They reminded her of hospitals, not that she'd have been inside of one since her miscarriage. Not even to visit her best friend who was fighting for her life. After two months Elizabeth wondered if she was still Emily's friend. At first they'd been playing phone tag, but since quitting Kelly's and focusing all her time on getting ready for her one-woman show, she hadn't even been leaving messages any more. Not that Emily was trying to call her. Not that anyone called her, she thought miserable.
The phone never rang. The only person who rang the doorbell was Faith. It scared her that she was actually looking forward to Faith's bi-weekly visits. Auguring with the cold-blooded bitch was the only thing she really had to look forward too … that and Ric coming home.
She was jealous beyond belief that Ric left the house. He got to go out to work. Lunch meetings, court dates, running errands. Hell she didn't even go out to shop. The housekeeper Ric hired did everything around the house—the grocery shopping, the cleaning, the gardening, and the cooking (which was the only thing Elizabeth was grateful for). "Hell," Elizabeth muttered under her breath, "she'll be painting next."
Ric brought her home everything. Art supplies. Clothes. Books. When she wanted to go out he convinced her that they should stay in. She didn't even go out to use that damn pool he'd wanted so badly. When was the last time I was outside? she wondered. The sun seemed like a foreign entity. That wasn't right.
Nothing about her marriage was right, except the way she was treasured. Ric truly made her feel important. He valued her. She had briefly felt that before with Lucky and Jason, but neither of them held onto her. Lucky just fell out of love with her and Jason … she didn't matter enough. Elizabeth remembered his words from so long ago, "You can live by your own rules and not care what anyone thinks. Until someone loves you and you love them, and then their rules have to matter, too." Well it was clear to her that Jason had never really felt that way about her because her rules never mattered to him. She never mattered, not enough for his so-called honesty, not enough for him to fight for her.
But Ric did. She kept shutting him down, telling him they were over, but he kept trying. She mattered to him. That meant everything.
Yet she was unhappy. She had everything—an attentive husband, her own show, and lovely home. Much to Elizabeth's dismay, her entire life center around one person. How had that happened again?
Elizabeth blinked at the canvas in front of her. She had started painting abstracts not long after they moved in, she like to think she was trying something different, but knew it was lie. She had no inspiration inside her house. Everything was flat, a veneer of perfection.
The painting jolted her out of her depressing thoughts. It was their house, but it was gray – lifeless. The blooming garden around it was painted angry red and almost looked like it was on fire around the house. The sky was moody with purple clouds, as if a storm was about to open up and plunder the house beneath it. Framing the painting were steel gray bars. She had painted prison.
Her eyes dilated as she gulped in short breaths. "No. No. No," she chanted low shaking her head. Her life was not a jail cell. Anger, swift and violent filled her, without a thought Elizabeth picked up the butter knife resting on her lunch plate and attacked the painting. The dull knife penetrated the canvas only because of Elizabeth's sheer force of will as she threw her full weight behind each stroke.
On her sixth stroke a panting Elizabeth stopped in mid-stroke. The canvas was destroyed, long strips hung ragged. Bursting into tears she sank to the floor. She wanted to call out. Not to Ric, to anyone but him, but Elizabeth did know if anyone else would bother to hear her.
"Are you sure nothing is wrong with your phone?" Audrey asked concern flashing in her blue eyes. She had barely talked to Elizabeth since her marriage, and hadn't seen her at all. She would have gone to the house but Ric informed her that Elizabeth was busy painting for her show. Audrey was seriously beginning to doubt that Elizabeth was that busy. Nobody was too busy to pick up a phone.
"Of course," Ric said. He wanted to snap at the interfering old nurse but held back. If Nurse Hardy got suspicious she'd go out to see Elizabeth. Things were so close to where he wanted them to be, he couldn't risk that happening. "You know Elizabeth … she gets lost in her painting."
Audrey took a deep breath. The gall of the man! Of course she knew granddaughter, which was why, she was nervous. Her friends were everything to Elizabeth but she hadn't been to the hospital to see Emily, and neither Lucky nor Nikolas had been in touch with her. It wasn't like Elizabeth to disappear out their lives or hers. Something was wrong but she couldn't put her finger on it. Ric smiled at her and it turned her stomach. I'm not stupid, I know a fake smile when it is flashed at me, she thought. "Fine. Just tell Elizabeth that I expect to see her tomorrow. She's blown off our weekly lunches for long enough."
"I'll tell her," Ric promised his dark eyes unreadable, "but the show is in two weeks …"
"Her show is not more important than her family," Audrey remarked cutting him off. "Either she meets me here or I'm coming over to the house," she said with finality. Audrey turned on her heels and left Ric standing there.
Swearing under his breath Ric stomped off. He wasn't about to let that old battle-ax ruin his plans.
"I just don't get why he has to spend every waking second with her," Courtney complained tossing some of her long blonde hair over her shoulder. "It's bad enough that we've postponed the wedding," she carped. Her annoyed blue eyes met Carly's hazel ones. Courtney couldn't read them at the moment, which concerned her. Her place was secure because of Carly and she needed to be able to read her.
"Look," Carly sighed rubbing her stomach, "I know you're disappointed about the wedding. I completely understand that, but Jason is doing what he needs to do." And when it came down between Jason and Courtney, Carly would always side with Jason. He was her best friend and the person she relied on most. Right now he was in pain, hurting over his sister's illness and having no way to fight it. Carly knew that was driving him crazy. Jason was a take action kind of guy but there was no action he could take against the cancer. "And you have to let him do it," she told Courtney with a frown. If the girl flipped her hair one more time she'd pull it out.
Where did that come from, Carly wondered. She like Courtney, they were friends. Courtney was her first female friend since the real Carly died, but lately … Courtney was rubbing her the wrong way. Probably hormones, she thought.
Courtney's cell phone chirped; she rolled eyes at Carly because she couldn't counter verbally. "Hello?"
"We have a problem," a slick voiced informed her.
"Tell me about it," Courtney replied. The final nails had to be driven into the coffin but a certain brunette waif was holding them up.
"I think we have different problems."
"Most likely," she said and shot Carly a smile. She couldn't afford for her sister-in-law to become suspicious.
"We need to meet."
"Ok. I'll be right there." Courtney stabbed the end button. "That was Mike," she lied smoothly. "He wants to have lunch. I hope you don't mind."
"No, of course not." In fact, Carly was relieved to be getting some time away from her oh so perky sister-in-law. "Tell Mike I said hi and give him my love."
"Sure thing," Courtney nodded slinging her jean jacket over her arm. "I'll be by later."
"Goody," Carly muttered as the door shut behind Courtney.
"Bald isn't such a bad look," Emily joked her eyes dark with pain. Her skin was pale and waxy. She forced a smile.
Her hand laid limp and cool in his, he didn't smile back at her. "You don't have to pretend with me," Jason reminded her.
Emily nodded but didn't meet his eyes. "You really don't have to stay with me," she told him for the zillionth time. "I know you hate hospitals just as much I do."
Jason didn't say anything. She'd been giving him the same speech at least twice day, every day. He didn't like hospitals and the private room the Quartermaines arranged wasn't much better than the typical hospital room. It was painted bright pink. The sent of flowers almost overpowered the smell of antiseptic and disease. Emily got fresh flowers everyday from the family, Nikolas Cassadine and Zander who she was still intent on pushing away. She was trying to push everyone way. He knew why and hated it. Emily fought for him, Zander, the rest of the family and her friends but for some reason she wasn't fighting for herself.
Jason wanted to shake her. He wanted to force her to listen to reason. Monica kept telling everyone not to push her. He didn't agree. Emily needed pushed.
It didn't help that her best friend hadn't bothered to come and visit her. Jason frowned fiercely thinking about Elizabeth. What happened to the woman he knew? The one who cared so much, who'd risk anything for the people she loved?
He was dwelling on her. They were long over and he was in love with Courtney, but he still couldn't get Elizabeth out of his mind. In one way or another she was always there. Right now he was furious with her … for marrying Ric, for disappearing from his sister's life when she need her most, and for the mere fact that he couldn't let her go.
He managed to let go of Robin and Carly. Robin was his past and Carly was a friend, but Elizabeth – Jason wasn't sure what she was … she was a part of his past but they certainly weren't friends, nonetheless, she was always there in the back of his mind.
His frown deepened as the memory assaulted him …
"You're who I want to be with, Jason." The words and the emotions behind them loosened the band that had been around his heart. "There. I said it. Do you believe me?" she questioned nervously. "Do you - do you feel the same way, or are you going to pull away again to remind me of all the times –"
"This isn't about - it's not about payback," he assured her.
"Then what is it about?" Elizabeth queried her blue eyes intense on his.
"Us. And how much you matter to me. I want to be with you, too," he finally admitted out loud.
"Finally," she smiled, "we agree on something."
"You know, there are things that I will never be able to give you. I can't - I can't promise that I'll never be called away in the middle of the night," he said, needing her to understand his life. "I can't promise I'll never have to leave you to go to a meeting in places I can't discuss, with people I can't talk about."
"It's your job," she replied.
"I know. It's not a job with security or structure. I don't punch a clock."
Elizabeth shook her head, "I know all of this."
"And I can't promise you that you'll never get hurt," he told her, hating that no matter how hard he would try he wouldn't always be able to protect her "- by this life that I lead or by me.
"No one can make promises like that, Jason. It wouldn't matter who you were - a shopkeeper, a lawyer, an accountant -
"That would be a stretch," he uttered with a shake of his head, and Elizabeth smiled.
"Anyone can break a heart. No one is completely safe when you care about another person."
"I would never hurt you on purpose," he vowed.
"That's important to me," Elizabeth told him.
But he had. He had intentionally let everyone, including Elizabeth, think that Sonny died. He hadn't meant to hurt her when he lied, it was necessary; but he could still picture the pain in her eyes after she found out the truth.
"Uh-uh, no. Sorry. I'm here and I'm in it and I count. You know what the ironic thing is? Is that you actually did tell me the truth. I just didn't want to hear it. When you kept pushing me away and you warned me about who you really are, I should have listened instead of making you up in my head. But you are Sonny's ... Sonny's enforcer, first... last... and always. I hope it's enough."
She wanted to be put first but his life wouldn't allow that. Business would always have to come first; their lives depended on it.
But yet here was at Emily's side putting her first before business, before Courtney, and Sonny and Carly. He had put Courtney first when he refused to give her up and that cost the business.
Maybe that's why he couldn't get Elizabeth out of his mind. She had mattered so much. From that first encounter at Jake's he had always wanted to be there for her – first as friend and then as something more. He waited for Elizabeth through her mourning, Lucky's return, and her relationship with Zander … yet when she mattered most, above everything and everyone, he pushed her to the end of his priorities and lost her.
"I'm sorry," Emily said meekly. The fierce frown on Jason's face upset her. Out of everyone he refused to go away and she loved him all the more for it. "I don't want you to go. Really I don't," she said through the hot tears rolling down her cheeks.
"It's okay Emily," Jason said pulling her into his arms. He ran his hand up and down her back trying to soothe her. "I'm here. I'm not going anywhere," he promised.
She nodded into his shoulder and burrowed closer. "I don't want to leave you either but … I'm so tired."
"I know," he replied kissing her temple. Holding her frail body close Jason shut his eyes forcing back his own pain so he could be strong for her. He was her rock, her safe place … they would weather this storm together.
"What took you so long?" Ric snapped when Courtney entered the dingy motel room.
"You think it's easy to throw off Sonny's guards? Well it's not," she seethed as she looked around their shabby surroundings. She shuttered at the dirt and grime, she had spent all of her young life trying to get away of places like this one. "Now tell me your problem and I'll tell you mine."
"Audrey Hardy."
"So Granny is finally doing the concerned routine," she laughed. "Took her long enough."
"I've been stone walling her, but she's no longer buying it," Ric informed his partner. His dark eyes skimmed over her. It had been a long time since they had been lovers and frankly he preferred Elizabeth dark looks to Courtney's sunshine, but he knew not to show it. Courtney was nothing if not jealous, especially of Elizabeth.
"It's the doe eyed innocent's fault," Courtney remarked with distaste. Her blue eyes glimmered with scorn, "Everyone is starting to be suspicious because Elizabeth hasn't been by to see her and no one else exists for Jason at the moment. She's ruining our plans."
"Audrey is the bigger problem," Ric state ignoring Courtney's rant. "We need to keep Elizabeth isolated. The drug is building up in her system and lack of contact with the outside world will do the rest. She'll be as crazy as a loon by the opening."
"What does that matter if I'm not married to Jason? The plan was divide and conquer and it worked perfectly," she reminded him. "Using Alcazar to separate Sonny from his magic touch lawyer worked flawlessly. Faith as also shaken things up for us. We've made him venerable."
"It cost us a lot too," he reminded her thinking about the time he spent in jail.
"Please," Courtney scoffed. "Try being married to AJ Quartermaine. Try playing the sweet and innocent bunny? Or how about playing loyal sister to our over-bearing control freak brother?"
"Ah but you've completely snowed Carly, Sonny and Jason," he complimented her.
Courtney grinned. "We've wreaked havoc," she said cheerfully, "but it's time to go for the kill."
"Whoa! Calm down," Ric instructed seeing the anxious look in her eyes. "We're almost there. We can't risk blowing this Courtney."
"I know that!" she retorted. "Ric I have two weeks to get Jason to marry me, which he won't because he's too busy playing nursemaid to that brat he calls a sister."
"You're just jealous. Admit it Courtney," he egged her on with a smarmy smile, "you wanted a big brother just like him."
"No," she denied crossing her arms. "Stop trying to analyze me or my motives Ric. It's simple for both of us … we hate our brother. He took Adela from you and he haunted Mike so much that my father left me," her voice was hard and venomous. "If that wasn't bad enough he did his best to replace us. First with Stone and then Jason," she saw Ric flinch at the name, oh yeah, she wasn't the one with big brother issues, "and let's not forget Saint Robin. Sonny's not getting away with it."
"No he won't," Ric agreed. "But first we have to handle Audrey."
"Don't forget Emily."
"Oh, I think I have away around that one."
"Really?" her eyes gleamed. "Well," Courtney licked her lips, "I think I know what to do about Granny."
"Honey what are you doing?" Ric asked the next morning. Robe clad, Elizabeth stood over the bed deliberating between three different outfits. She wore a soft layering of makeup. She looked beautiful. It was a shame; he thought once again, that she had to be another pawn in his game against brother.
"What? Oh, I was just trying to decide what to wear to my lunch with Gram today," she replied absently.
"Sweetie you haven't been going to those lunches for weeks," he reminded her.
"I know," Elizabeth said feeling a fresh sense of guilt hit her. She stiffened when she felt Ric's arms wrap around her. She tried to relax as he pulled against his chest.
"Shouldn't you be painting?" he inquired kissing her neck.
"I only have one more to go. Besides I haven't seen Gram for weeks. And I want to stop by the hospital afterwards to see Emily."
"That's sweet of you honey," Ric told her running his hand down her hair, "but you know your Grandmother is out of town."
Surprised spread across her face, "What?" Elizabeth turned in his arms. "When? Why didn't she tell me?"
Ric frowned, "She did … well she left a message. Honestly, Elizabeth I thought you said you were paying attention to them," he tisked.
"I have been," she replied worrying her bottom lip, at least she thought she had been. "Out of town," Elizabeth said again as if she didn't understand what that meant.
"Yes. To see Sarah," Ric informed her in an exasperated manner, so she'd think they'd discussed it before.
"Oh," Elizabeth mumbled disappointed. "Well I can at least see Emily."
"Not today," Ric said, he continued on when Elizabeth tried to protest. "Jason and Courtney are getting married in the hospital chapel this afternoon."
This wasn't the dream wedding Courtney talked about. She wanted the ceremony to take place in a church, to wear a white dress and have reception afterwards where they would dance. Jason remembered how she'd glowed when she talked about it.
The hospital chapel smelled heavily of burning wax. There were no flowers to decorate it as Carly had endlessly described. He wasn't wearing a tux. While he felt more comfortable in his jeans, t-shirt, and worn boots he wasn't the picture perfect groom Courtney had envisioned.
His bride-to-be wore a pale yellow summer dress and walked down the aisle towards him with a makeshift bouquet. Carly was already standing in front of the chapel with him and Sonny waiting for Mike and Courtney to finish the short march.
Besides Emily and Monica there were no other Quartermaines in attendance. Not that he cared, but Courtney made a point about wanting to invite them, especially Lila.
He didn't like that Courtney, and most likely Carly, had gone behind his back and talk to Emily. Everything about this moment felt forced.
"I want to see you happy Jason. Married and happy," she smiled. Emily words from late last night broke his heart. She sounded so forlorn. Today she was smiling a real smile, happy and excited for him. He didn't want to let her down.
It was a hell of a reason to get married, but Jason reminded himself that he loved Courtney. That's why he asked Mike for her hand in marriage, why he tried on all those god-awful tuxes, and why he agreed to the big wedding Courtney had said she wanted.
He was hemmed in and hated it but he couldn't say no. Not to Emily, not to Courtney, and certainly not to Carly. So today was his wedding day.
The house was getting smaller by the day, the hours longer, and her paintings stranger. She had one week until her show and Elizabeth had cut herself off from everything and everyone except Ric and painting. She no longer searched out the housekeeper or even bothered to answer the door for Faith.
When Ric wasn't around, Elizabeth was locked up in her studio on the third floor talking to her painting. Talking out loud to canvases didn't worry her, expecting them to answer did. Or at least it had the first few days, now she was beyond annoyed at their silence.
"Why do you keep rearranging what I paint, huh? Why?" she questioned the canvas her ire growing.
Irritable Elizabeth glowered at the intensely colored canvas. She hated the bold mocking colors and crisp lines that defined every feature separate from the others. Wetting her brush Elizabeth smeared the paint until nothing but mixed blobs of colors could be made out.
Her eyes narrowed as she looked at the swirls of color. Suddenly they took on a vacant look. "If all my yesterdays turned into tomorrows would I be new again/Would I be pure and innocent/We are so unknowing at birth, like a blank canvas waiting to be painted./But somehow my paint was smeared and the masterpiece that was me/Was ruined./Gone is the beauty and the style./What's left is a mess/No longer am I pretty with/Bold colors and sharp lines./I am blurred."
Shaking Elizabeth took a step back from the canvas. "Stop it! Stop mocking me," she pleaded dropping to the floor. Hunched she held her knees to her chest and rocked back and forth. The room was getting smaller causing her to struggle for oxygen.
Her terrified eyes never left the blurred painting. "You are me and I am you," she chanted softly.
"Because sometimes when I'm painting I get this - this - I don't know - this feeling of power, like if I were to get it right, then I can make people see things differently. And it doesn't matter how hard it's going to be because it's all worth it."
The wind whipped around him, slapping his weary face, as he sped down the road. Normally the sound and the speed helped. At the moment the ride was doing little to soothe his nerves.
"Ok, well, maybe not the wind exactly, but how the wind feels against my face when I'm on the back of your motorcycle – like the world is just screaming by and nothing matters but the wind. And it's trying to carry me and take me away, and I feel like if I let go, I can almost fly."
Jason wasn't sure why he heard Elizabeth's words in his head. But he understood what she felt. He used to feel that way. But the ride wasn't working, if anything, it was making things worse. The world wasn't falling away. It was assaulting him.
Brother. Uncle. Friend. Business Partner. Husband … why was that coming last? His wife, the woman he loved was his last priority. He was getting an earful about that, but he'd been shrugging it off believing that Courtney understood even though she wasn't happy with the arrangement. He was beginning to doubt that—hell he was beginning to doubt a lot of things.
Since his marriage a little over a week ago he hadn't been able to get Elizabeth Webber out of his thoughts. His anger and resentment were gone replaced with concern. Elizabeth hadn't been seen in weeks, nor had she spoken with anyone.
They might have parted on bad terms, but Jason knew Elizabeth. He knew she wouldn't disappear like this … or maybe he was lying to himself. He hadn't expected Elizabeth to get involved with Ric let alone marry the guy. Maybe he didn't know her like he thought he had, maybe the connection they use to feel was just an illusion. His heart rebelled against the thought.
What had been between Elizabeth and him had been very real, and very powerful. Even after he fell in love with Courtney he could walk into a room and sense Elizabeth's presence. It was something he thought would go away but never had. Jason admitted that he missed it—the jolt it sent zinging through his system. It made him feel alert and very alive.
He was sorely tempted to drive over and burst into her house if need be to check on her, but he hadn't gotten a warm reception the last time he did that. Something was wrong there, Jason was sure of it. He seriously doubted that Ric would let him in long enough or close enough to figure it out though.
Her gallery show was coming up soon. Three more days. Jason gripped the handlebars tightly not sure if he could wait that long.
Once he knew that Elizabeth was okay, he was convinced that she would be out of his mind once and for all so he could finally put his concentration where it belonged … on his new wife.
"You don't have to be here. We can go anywhere."
"Run way from everything? Never look back?"
"Or look back when you're ready. Come back here because you want to, not because you feel obligated to stay."
"This is my life."
"It doesn't have to be, you can find something else."
"With you."
"Yeah, with me. Or not. I mean, if we get where we're going, Italy or wherever, and then you decide you can't stand me, I'll walk away. At least you'll be free."
"I don't wanna be free. I wanna be with Ric."
"When are you gonna see the truth? Ric's dangerous."
"He's made mistakes, but so have you."
"I know, but I don't attack people and then lie about it."
"He wouldn't lie."
"But he did. Elizabeth, you can't fix this, you can't turn Ric back into the person that you loved."
"He still is the person I love, and he always will be."
"Don't you see what's in front of you? The whole world is waiting for you. We could see it together, or you can see it alone, just … just get away from Ric and go someplace safe."
"Jason, please just stop, okay? Cause I don't want to fight with you, I don't want to be angry. But you're wrong about Ric. I know his heart, he really is loving and gentle, and I trust him. So you need to trust me. I'm doing the right thing; I know what I'm doing."
"Just be careful."
"I don't have to be, Ric would never hurt me."
"I hope you're right."
"I never thought that I could love Ric and have feelings for you. I didn't handle it very well. I didn't handle it at all. You've been so supportive of me…"
"Elizabeth, it's all right. You decided and now we both know."
"Thank you for understanding."
"No, I don't. But maybe that proves you're just doing the right thing. Just please be happy cause that's all I really want."
"I will be, now that I'm clear on what's in my heart. That's something else you gave me."
Startled Jason awoke in a cold panic beside Emily. His hand clutched tightly around hers. Blinking, he took a few deep breaths to soothe himself. Memory and what-if's were blending together in his dreams, but he didn't dream. At least he never had before.
Tomorrow, Jason thought, he would see Elizabeth tomorrow and everything would go back to normal. His thoughts would no longer linger on her and if he were lucky he'd never have another dream.
For the last half-hour Jason watched as Elizabeth stood in the corner trying her best to fade into the wall so that she wouldn't have to talk to anyone. It was as if she didn't want to be noticed by the people around her.
Seeing her now, under weight with dark shadow under her eyes, Jason realized how isolated she had become.
His eyes narrowed as he observed a thin ferret-looking man approach her. Elizabeth jumped when he spoke to her. She appeared to be unsettled, unwilling to meet the man's gaze. Though he couldn't hear their conversation Jason noticed that Elizabeth kept her answers short or spoke with a nod of her head.
Something was seriously wrong. He cursed himself for not noticing sooner. Granted they hadn't really been friends in months, but that didn't matter now. Elizabeth did, she always mattered to him, and she always would he finally realized.
Once the ferret left her alone Jason made his move. He could hear her mumbling as he approached her but couldn't quite make out the words. "Elizabeth," he said, his voice low so not to startle her.
"I am blurred," she whimpered pulling back from him. Her blue eyes were wide, spacey even.
"Elizabeth," Jason said her name again. Reaching out he touched her chin forcing her to meet his gaze. "Elizabeth," he repeated once she looking at him, though to Jason it felt like she was looking through him.
"Do I know you?" she asked perplexed. The blue of his eyes triggered a memory. "Wait of course I do … you're Jason. I use to know you, and love you. But you never loved me," she rambled. "Shh," she instructed the canvas next to her. "I'm allowed to talk him." She turned attention the other painting, "And I'm not make a fool of myself." Elizabeth shook her head trying to drown the painting out. When she focused again she smiled politely at Jason. "Hey Jason. I didn't expect to see you here." The concerned and dumbfounded look on his face had her asking, "What?"
"Who were you talking to?"
"To you of course," she replied exasperated.
"No, before that," Jason prompted clamping down on his panic. "You said you were allowed to talk to me."
"Well of course I'm allowed to talk to you! What do you think? That Ric controls my life?" she scoffed her eyes narrowing in anger.
"No of course not …"
"Now why don't I believe you?" she inquired crossing her arms.
"Elizabeth …"
"Is he bothering you?" Ric asked stepping between Jason and Elizabeth. His dark eyes shimmered with hatred as he faced down Jason. "I don't remember sending you an invitation. I'll have him tossed out of here if you want," he told Elizabeth glancing at her over his shoulder. Ric sent her a reassuring smile, before turning his attention back to Jason.
"That's not necessary." Elizabeth ran a hand across his shoulder to ease him. It was sweet, really it was, not condensing but sweet the way he was trying to protect her. "Why does everyone think they have to do that?"
"What was that honey?" Ric inquired twisting to look at her. The vacant look was back in her eyes.
"I am capable of protecting myself you know?" she retorted in a tone of voice that hadn't escaped her mouth since she was fifteen.
"I know," he said patting her hand.
Elizabeth arched a brow. "Oh yeah?" she gazed down at their joined hands. "I doubt that."
Ric frowned. "Elizabeth are you feeling okay?"
"It's Lizzie," she hissed snatching her hand out of his. "Why is everyone asking me that anyhow? Yeah I'm talk to you to Blondie." Her eyes scanned her surroundings, "What the hell is this place."
"An art gallery," Ric replied plastering on a convincing look of concern.
"Art," she grimaced. "I so gotta get out of here."
"I don't think that is a good idea," Jason remarked.
"Look buddy," she said rolling her eyes, "you're cute and all but I don't listen to my parents so I'm sure as hell not going to listen to you." With that said she sidestepped the two men.
Jason tried to stop her but Ric grabbed him. "You're obviously upsetting my wife. I want you to leave."
Jason didn't bother to answer Ric. When Ric wouldn't let him pull away, he pushed Ric forcefully away from him. Glowering he turned around, he glance over the crowd quickly. Jason cursed under his breath when he realized that Elizabeth wasn't there.
Elizabeth stood frozen in the park. The soft rose dress she wore reflected scarlet red back at her in the fountain water. She could feel the cold ground against her back and the weight over her. Fear kept her from moving, from fighting back. She wanted to scream, or kick, or bite … or do something.
A painful moan escaped her lips. It was a low mourning sound. It's happening again, was all she could think.
When Elizabeth felt strong hands on her shoulders the rage that he been bubbling within her was unleashed. Her body moved of it's own accord as she threw her fits against solid chest. "Elizabeth," a soft anxious voice chanted trying to get through to her.
Blinking the world came back into focus. Jason was standing in front of her. Holding her. "Ja-aa-son," she stumbled over his name. The world started to spin behind him. He was the only thing solid, the only thing strong.
Jason caught Elizabeth as she fell forward. He felt is heart stop. He finally sucked in a much-needed breath after he was certain that Elizabeth was still breathing. Gently he lifted her and hugged her close to him. Jason knew he had to get her to the hospital but he didn't want Ric to get close to her.
Mercy was his only option.
He finally had his answer. The epiphany hit him as he watched Elizabeth crumble in front of him. He pushed Elizabeth away because she mattered, more than anyone else, and he needed her. He needed her to be alive. He needed her to be in the world, maybe not close … hell she could even hate him, but she had to be there. He needed that and that's why he pushed her away. Elizabeth never would have been safe if she stayed with him. She would always be surrounded by danger and at anytime he could lose her.
There had been the bomb in her studio. The threats she received from Joseph Sorel. Her kidnapping. Hell she was even shot before his eyes. Jason remembered the fear that almost over took every time she was in harm's way.
He knew now that he had been looking for something, anything that would make Elizabeth angry enough to walk away because he never would have been able to.
Elizabeth made the world a better place. Knowing her had made him better. Immersed in the dark underbelly of society, Elizabeth embodied everything that beautiful in the world. He would never be able to have that, not in his line of work, but with Elizabeth he'd been able to taste it. It was intoxicating and tempting as she was. If Elizabeth died, Jason knew he would lose that feeling and hadn't been willing to lose it.
So he lied by omission. He lost Elizabeth, but not completely. He held onto every moment and every word. She was alive. That's what mattered most.
Jason wasn't sure what this knowledge meant. He loved Courtney and was married to her, but it was Elizabeth who touched his soul … who resided there.
"I really hate hospitals," he said dragging a weary hand down his face. After forty-five minutes of examinations and tests the doctors had finally put Elizabeth in a tiny private room.
"I need a name," the nurse insisted.
"Elizabeth … Morgan. She's my wife."
The words had felt so right when he said them, which only served to confound him. He'd never been in emotional turmoil quite like this before. His sister was dying, he was betraying his wife in his thoughts, and the woman who meant everything to him was lying unconscious in a hospital bed.
"Mr. Morgan?" the doctor said entering the room.
Jason swiveled in the chair. His tired eyes met the doubtful green eyes of Dr. Craig. "Yeah?"
"You said your wife wasn't taking anything. Correct?" she asked looking down at the toxicology results.
"Yes."
"Really?" Dr. Craig replied. "According the tox screening there is something in her system. It's nothing we've seen before. We're trying to do a breakdown of elements but since we don't the last time she took …"
"Elizabeth doesn't take drugs," Jason snapped interrupting the doctor. At least not knowingly, which left Ric. His hands fisted at his sides.
The lethal look in his eyes stopped the doctor from arguing the point with him. "There is something in her system. It seems to be affecting the synapses in her brain. Which would explain her symptoms."
Jason nodded, hearing her words while he plotted Ric's demise.
Elizabeth opened her eyes slowly. Her body ached but she wasn't sure why. The bright sunlight filtering into the room blinded her. Shifting away from the light she bumped into the guardrail. Confused she looked up and met Jason's intense blue eyes intense of Ric dark ones. "Whaaa … Jason? Why are you here? And where is here?" she asked glancing around the unfamiliar room.
"You're at Mercy hospital," he said fighting back the urge to reach out and touch her. "I brought you here last night."
"Why?" she inquired her brow furled.
"Do you remember anything about last night Elizabeth?"
You, was the first thing that came to mind, but Elizabeth didn't tell him that. She had a clear picture of Jason but not much else. "My show … wait! Where's Ric? What did you do to him?" she asked accusingly.
"Nothing," Jason responded roughly. Nothing yet at least, he thought.
"Than why isn't he here?" It wasn't like Ric to let her out of his sight.
"Because he doesn't know you're here. Just let me explain Elizabeth?'
A plump redheaded nurse entered the room. "Good morning Mrs. Morgan. I'm glad to see you awake. I just need to check your readings," she nodded towards the machine's surrounding Elizabeth.
Mrs. Morgan, Elizabeth eyes widened. She stared at Jason completely mystified. Had he kidnapped her? No that didn't make sense. Mercy was too close and too public. So what the hell was going on? And why did she prefer the sound of Mrs. Morgan to Mrs. Lansing?
"Good riddance Port Charles," Courtney said gleefully as she watched the car burn. She tilted her head to look at her partner. "The rest is up to you now Ric."
"I know," he smiled watching the flames. "Sonny will blame Jason for your untimely demise and once they're at odds I'll go in for the kill."
"I just wish I could be here to witness it."
"I'll send pictures," he promised.
"By the looks of it there shouldn't be any permanent damage," Dr. Craig assured them later that afternoon. "The drug is reducing by half every six hours. It should be completely out of your system in another eighteen hours or so."
"Thank you doctor," Elizabeth replied. Relief washed through her. At first she wanted to deny Jason's accusations that Ric was drugging her, but there was no other explanation. She hadn't taken anything and no one else was close enough to drug her.
The hurt and betrayal she felt vanished quickly into anger. Once again her life was lie. Elizabeth knew she would feel the heartbreak later. At the moment she was to damn furious to feel much of anything else.
"Can I be released now?"
"I wouldn't suggest it …"
"Dr. Craig," she interrupted. "My friend Emily is in the hospital. I haven't seen her yet and I really need to. If anything happens help won't be far away. Please?"
Jason kept quiet. He didn't think leaving Mercy was the smart thing to do, but Elizabeth had been held hostage for far to long. He wasn't going to force her to stay in hiding.
"I don't know." The doctor tapped her fingers against Elizabeth's chart as she thought about it. "I suppose so," she finally relented.
"Thank you. Thank you so much," Elizabeth beamed, smiling for the first time and weeks.
Elizabeth leaned on Jason as they rode the elevator. She had stolen a few quick glances at him since they left Mercy but hadn't said a word to him. Frankly she wasn't sure what to say. Thank you. You were right. Damn you to hell for breaking my fantasy world. They all applied, but Elizabeth wasn't thrilled with any of them. Thank you didn't seemed to do justice to her feelings, she hated being wrong and she did feel very disillusioned at the moment but didn't want to share that with Jason just yet.
She peeked another quick look at him as the doors slid open.
"Where the hell have you been?" Sonny jumped down Jason's throat the second they stepped off the elevator.
"Sonny don't," a very pregnant and very upset Carly pleaded. It was obvious that she had been crying.
"What's wrong?" Jason asked a feeling of dread washing over him.
"What's wrong," Sonny seethed. His dark eyes were stormy with emotion. "Where the hell have been Jason?" he repeated his earlier question. "I needed you … Courtney," he voice broke. "I've been trying to get a hold of you all day," he forced out the words, his voice rough.
"Is Courtney all right?" Elizabeth asked. Though she no longer cared about her, Elizabeth knew she mattered to Jason, and was married to him if she could believe Ric.
Sonny's eyes narrowed in her. He finally realized she was there. "Ric did this! You're husband just killed my sister," he shouted stepping towards her ready to attack.
Jason pushed Elizabeth behind him. The news of Courtney's death hit him hard but his instincts to protect Elizabeth penetrated the sorrow that gripped him.
"Get out of way," Sonny ordered.
He shook his head no. "This isn't Elizabeth's fault," Jason said.
"Don't defend her. She married that monster … now get out of my way."
"No."
"Ahhh!" Carly cried out in pain as Sonny threw back his arm to punch Jason. She hated the rouse she was about to put them through but she wouldn't let her husband and best friend destroy each other. Cupping her stomach Carly let the tears flow.
"Carly," Sonny gasped painfully. Moving swiftly he caught her. "It will be okay," he said softly in her ear. "I'm here. You're fine. The baby is fine," he reassured as Bobbie hurried over.
"Honey what's wrong? Are you cramping?" Bobbie asked her fear as a mother battling against her nurse's training.
Carly merely nodded weakly.
"Okay, we need to get you to down to the ER," Bobbie stated.
"Why not go straight to Dr. Meadows?" Sonny asked.
"She's delivering another baby right now," Bobbie replied steering them towards the elevator.
"Jase," Carly said lifting her eyes to his. Carly scared years off of his life but Jason nodded in understanding. He didn't like her plan much more than she did, but accepted it for what it was meant to be.
"I'll take you to Emily," he told Elizabeth after the elevator doors slid close.
"What about Carly?" she asked clearly worried.
"She's fine," he informed a very skeptical Elizabeth. "We're all going to be okay," Jason promised.
THE END