ATR: Freeverse: I'm not really into rock or anything, I hardly know about
any of the groups you mentioned, I don't usually listen to Pop or Rock so I
grabbed the next best thing that almost everyone else seemed to be using in
the Rogue fics, I probably should have just used Country since that's my
fav. type of music. Anyway, about Gambit and her being too close in the
beginning, I get your meaning, but I really hadn't been planning to go
anywhere with this fic, the chapters just kept piling up and I decided to
post. Thanks for reviewing, though.
Wolviesfan: Now that you mention it, Logan was acting OOC, guess I missed that when I re-read and edited my chap, in future parts I'll try to get his character down better.
(A/N: Love ya'll, thank you soooo much for RnRing my fic, sorry this took sooooo long to update) ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------
Rogue, Kitty, and Wanda sat in Rogue's room discussing how they would break the news of Magneto's death to Pietro, Mystique had gone back to Bayville to 'reclaim' the old Brotherhood and if she was feeling gracious enough, she would leave it up to the girls to tell them what happened.
The Acolytes were staying at the house still, surprisingly on Irene's insistence, this, of course, made Kitty practically ecstatic.
Wanda had been acting weird, ever since she woke up she seemed to be on auto-pilot, spaced out, as if she couldn't believe it was over, she'd spent so much time on revenge and increasing hatred towards her father, now she doesn't know where to go from here.
Rogue was solemn, taking all this in, finally deciding that she should be the one to speak Pietro about it, neither of her friends were in any condition to carry out the task.
"Ah'll tell him" her announcement fell on death ears, she sulked in the silence, thinking on her own problems, *What a nice, depressed, mentally dysfunctional team we make*
Well she had to exclude Kitty from the depressed part, the girl was off in la la land, probably wondering what color to paint her and Peter's picket fence house.
So the three stayed like that for a while, until they heard commotion downstairs, Kitty and Wanda both looked pleadingly over at Rogue, who sighed and floated slowly out the door, shutting and locking it behind her.
She took her time coming down into the living room, Gambit, Pyro, and Colossus casually standing or leaning against various parts near the exists, trying to inconspicuously block the old Brotherhood's way out.
Mystique left the room as soon as Rogue entered, Irene was nowhere to be found, *They ain't making this easy on me* she thought grudgingly, she glanced at Quicksilver's confused face, he was obviously wondering when exactly Raven gained permission to boss them around.
"Where's my father" he instantly demanded, Rogue clenched her teeth, deciding to just come out and say it, "He's dead" she didn't offer any explanation, just raced quickly back up to her room, letting the Acolytes deal with the BoM's reaction.
After what seemed like a million long, agonizing hours of silence, there was pounding on her door, Wanda unconsciously scooted farther back on the bed, Rogue winced, Kitty jumped.
"ROGUE!!!"
*Don't kill the messenger!* she shot telepathically, she went to the door and hurridly slipped out, again locking it behind her.
There stood Pietro, his clear blue eyes searching her emerald ones, as if begging it not to be true, Rogue wavered under his gaze, she finally had to look away, this was wrong, it was just wrong.
Without giving it another thought, the Goth reached out and squeezed Pietro's hands with her gloved ones, guiding him into the next room and turned to glare at Remy, warning him not to come in.
Quicksilver dropped to his knees in the middle of the floor, stunned, then the tears came, Rogue knelt beside him, bringing him into an embrace, careful not to make skin contact.
He clung to her like a lifeline, like she had clung to Gambit not so long ago.
It was then Rogue realized something, both Maximoff children had built their lives around their father, in one way or another, everything they did came back to him, one wanted his attention and would give the universe to live up to his expectations, the other wanted to put him through all the suffering she'd done at his hand.
Now, the core of what each teen had wasted their life working on, was gone, there was a void of doubt that settled in the master of magnetism's passing, where would they go from here? How do they build a new foundation out of so much grief and trauma?
Rogue found herself hating the man even more then when he was alive, how could he have done this to his own kids? He'd played them like pawns, they had never known a world that didn't have something to do with him, it would be hard for both to move on.
Eventually, Pietro cried himself to sleep, Rogue lifted him gently with her TK and set him on the bed, taking his shoes off and pulling the covers up around him, she sat on the edge and brushed some hair away from his face.
She leaned forward and lightly brushed her lips on his forehead, feeling the slightest absorption, insuring that he would stay asleep longer then his metabolism usually allowed.
Then she crept quietly out, shutting the door and nearly colliding with Gambit, she saw the questions flash in his eyes but she didn't wanna deal with him right then, so she zipped into her room with Quicksilver's speed before he had a chance to make the tiniest sound.
She saw that Wanda and Kitty had snuck off to their own rooms during the moment she'd been comforting Pietro, she sighed and laid on her bed, falling into her mindscape. She closed her eyes, soaking up the old familiar smells around her, the peacful solitude of that small country home, she was young again, free from humanity, no one but her.
Suddenly, Rogue heard a low chuckle emanating from the deep recesses of her mind, she managed to hold back her tremors when she recognized who it was, she was tugged, once again, through her mindscape, *This shouldn't be happening!* she cursed.
"*No need to worry, my dear, I am simply here to help*"
Rogue highly doubted that, but she knew he wouldn't try to take her body over, he could've at any time, though he never seemed compelled to.
"*What do you want?*" her tone was more wary than harsh, she just realized how exhausted she was from all that'd been going on lately, not really allowing herself a break since she absorbed the person standing before her.
"*You've been stressing too much over the details, I am here to provide you with the full perspective, a bird's-eye-view of your recent predicament*" Mesmero explained.
Rogue frowned, out of confusion and surprise, confused that he would want to help her and surprised that his intentions seemed sincere, "*Why?*"
"*How do I put this?*" he put a finger to his chin and tapped it rhythmatically, Rogue almost had to smile at the childish demeanor the action gave him, he was starting to look more like the college student from his memories.
"*See when you absorbed me*" his voice broke into her musings and she forced herself to become more serious, "*You did me a favor, I would have been forever trapped in Apocalypse's hold, been a mindless puppet, caused the destruction of so much, but you, in a way, rescued me from that personal hell*"
Rogue was taken aback at his words, for a while she couldn't speak, how could her wretched curse, being the tormenting trap for so many psychs, now be someone's liberation?
This was totally different from the usual reaction she got from the people she absorbed, they always tormented her for as long as they could, making her drown in guilt and self-hatred until their voices faded along with her use of their powers.
He smiled a little at her stunned silence, "*So it would only be right if I helped you in your current affairs*" he finished.
The Goth bit her lip, "*What've Ah got to lose?*" she smirked, "*Alright, what exactly have Ah been looking for, Ah was pretty content with life, accepting my powers and all, then Ah cracked*"
"*It's because you never truly came to terms with it, the isolation, the loneliness, and now that he's here, I doubt you ever will*" Mesmero answered.
Rogue scowled, knowing full well who he was talking about, "*What's that Swamp Rat got to do with anything*"
"*He is just like you, pushing his feelings aside until they become too hard to cope with, not dealing with them, always hiding, never letting anyone see who he really is, but most importantly, he's lonely as well, and when you met, the defense broke, and the bond started*"
"*What bond?*" she asked bitterly, "*And how can he be lonely, how could he even know the meaning of the word! No one knows, no one understands, never being able to touch another person, wanting to, taking one low blow after another when you see the others kissing, holding, caressing without anything keeping them back, then having the thing you want most turned into some horrific nightmare! Violation is even worse than isolation! How would he understand, the guy probably lost his virginity at fourteen with the way the girls attract to him like a magnet!!!*"
Mesmero was unfazed by her outburst, he let her calm down before continuing, "*You will never know how he can understand if you keep pushing him away, can't you see? The reason why it was so easy to open up to him, when with any other person you would have turned away, that's why it didn't hurt to show him your scars*"
Rogue was hardly convinced, and she would not take the risk, sure, it hadn't hurt, but what if Mesmero was wrong, she would be putting herself in a vulnerable position, and she hated that concept worse than any other twisted option the universe had to offer.
"*What Ah did was a mistake, Ah wasn't thinking clearly, for Christ sakes he's the enemy! Back to my first question, what bond?*"
"*You feel him, even without my---your powers, it's too late for you to start closing off now, just try it, come out from the mask before it consumes you*"
Rogue threw her hands up in exasperation, "*See? This is one of the many reasons why Ah never open up to anybody, it gets turned into such a big friggin' deal, is it such a crime?! Ah slipped, poured my heart out to the first person that came along, and it ends like this, why do my demons insist on tormenting me?*"
Mesmero sighed, "*As I said, you are one in the same, that is why you've connected*"
"*Urrggh, let me back into the real world*" she didn't want this to happen, she was never going to let some ego inflated Cajun waltz passed her barriers into everything she had worked so hard to keep hidden, just because Apocalypse's former flunky decided to go mentor and evaluate her ever confusing life.
He was reluctant to follow her command, but knew that he was getting nowhere by keeping her here until she took his advice, so he complied, hoping to find another way to show her.
Rogue ran out the door the second her eyes opened. Thoughts running through her brain a mile a minute, she tried to shake the cold feeling that crept through her, her mask was perfectly in place.
BAMF, Kurt grabbed her and soon they were outside, a few miles away from the house, surrounded by rolling hills and open fields.
"KURT!" she glared at him in annoyance, but he stood his ground, "I vant answers, sister"
Rogue sank to her knees in exasperation, letting her brother wrap an arm around her shoulders, he didn't hesitate in cutting to the chase, "Vhy are you vith our mother?"
She never had given him an explanation, she hadn't known herself, now it was only semi-clear to her, "Ah couldn't stay any longer, Kurt, Ah didn't find all that Ah needed at the Institute"
"Vhat do you need?" he was concerned, and a little hurt that she hadn't confided in him earlier, she glanced away, then gestured around her, "This" she said, "Ah need a place where Ah can deal with my problems, Ah don't know who my demons are anymore, all Ah know is Ah can't keep handling them the way Ah have been or Ah'll break down again"
He sighed, "Does this mean you vont be coming back?" she shook her head, "Ah will, just not anytime soon" *Maybe Mesmero was right about one thing, I should get out of my mask before it consumes me, that was how I used to do things and look where it's gotten me*
"Alright" he said, a hint of sadness in his voice, "But I'll be coming to check on you guys, everyone's worried"
Rogue smiled, *Whoa, my face feels like it forgot how to do that* "So long as you don't bring Logan here in a slice-and-dice mood"
He grinned, then gave her a mock serious expression, "I might if any of those idiots in there lays a finger on you"
Her smile widened, "Aren't Ah so lucky to have a brother" they embraced before he teleported away.
Rogue headed back towards the house, feeling a little better and less confused, now that she realized why she had truly accepted Mystique's offer, praying that she would know how to handle this, wondering if maybe now the constant self-torment would stop.
She felt warm, the ice on her soul had somewhat melted.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------
Remy had to do a double take as Rogue came back inside, she actually looked happy for once, not exactly light-hearted, just temporarily happy.
"Mon Dieu, what have you done with Rogue?" he looked at her comically, wide- eyed and jaw-dropped.
She rolled her eyes but the small lift at the corners of her mouth remained, "Do me a favor and throw yourself off a cliff, Swamp Rat"
He flashed her that sexy smirk, "Anything for the lady, but I was thinkin' something more romantic" he raised an eyebrow suggestively.
She stood in front of him for a moment, arms crossed, giving him the once over as if she were considering the unspoken offer.
He was about to produce another witty comment when she uncrossed her arms and proceeded to walk proudly by him without a second thought, at least that's what it seemed, then he felt her fist make contact with his stomach and he doubled over, she grinned and left him to wallow in pain.
St. John conveniently happened to walk in at the same time this action took place, and he unceremoniously fell to the floor laughing, "So much for...the..Ragin' Cajun" he managed to gasp out before exploding into another round of giggles.
"I just have to work on this femme a bit, I still be great with the women, 'sides, I love a challenge" he said in his defense.
"Yea, sure mate" Pyro said after gaining his composure and grinning at his annoyed companion, "I think you're just losin' your touch and don't wanna admit it"
Remy smirked, but had learned a while ago that any debate with the insane Aussie was pointless, *Besides, I got me a girl to charm* he thought with a wicked grin, making the short trek to Rogue's room.
He found the door slightly ajar and stuck his head in, she was lounging back on her bed reading a book, quickly concealing it when she noticed she had a visitor.
"Ever heard of knockin'" she lashed out angrily, sitting up, but he saw through her mask as a cover for her embarrassment, he smiled, that could be used to his advantage.
"Where's the fun in that?" he asked, coming to sit beside her, she reflexively scooted farther away, he easily moved in further, tactfully cornering her, she frowned but made no movement to push him away just yet.
"What were you reading?" he said mock conversationally, he'd already seen the title of the book, noting it was the cause of her previous embarrassment.
"You tell me" she stated, turning to face him, leaning against the headboard, her action left her in a vulnerable position, she was daring him to get closer, challenging him to find out the consequences.
Remy was surprised by this change in behavior, although something told him he shouldn't be, it had been subtly going on since she'd shown up that fateful morning at the mansion door after spending the night in the woods, she didn't seem so afraid of possible contact anymore, the romance novel she'd been reading didn't interest him now, he could use it as blackmail later.
"Why were you out that night, Cher`e?"
Rogue's eyes widened slightly, "What are you talkin' about, Cajun?" he gave her a look, "You know full well, mon amour" *Whoa, where did THAT come from!?* his mind went on the instinctive defense.
Rogue was as stunned by his choice of endearment as he was, but she shrugged it off, categorizing it as one of his many, to-impress-the-ladies, lines, she returned to the subject at hand, "Ah.....uhhhhhhh" she caught his intense gaze and tried not to squirm.
*Damn, why can't I think of a good lie?* her mind shouted a few reasons, she ignored them, knowing that if she said anything the truth would spill out, just looking at him made her want to tell him everything.
So she opted for silence, Remy shifted on the bed, scooting so close they were barely inches apart.
Rogue tried to not get lost in his gaze and the warmth emanating from his body, she broke eye contact, "Touch shouldn't hurt" she whispered, an ache rising in her throat.
"You wouldn't understand, Ah've wanted ta touch for a pathetically long time, but those bastard guards made my first intimate contact a living hell. Ah guess Ah should be grateful for that in some twisted, sick way, it showed me that Ah would never be able to feel loved or wanted or close to another person, that even without my power Ah'd be just someone the world shoved in a corner until the needed to use me for their personal gain" "Cher`e" he whispered, he noticed she wasn't crying, in fact she had a calm acceptance on her face, that frightened him worse than any other reaction he wished he'd gotten to her soul pouring, she was actually telling herself she was worthless.
He made her look at him, his hands clamped gently but firmly on her shoulders, "Quit telling yourself those things, Rogue, I know what it feels like to have touch hurt, I used to be just an orphan livin' on the streets of New Orleans, the only way to earn money was to be a thief, or...." he trailed off, knowing she would catch his meaning.
Rogue looked down, her hair falling in front of her face, "Ah know Ah'm not the only one with problems, Cajun" she glanced back up, "But how many people can say they've never, physically, felt loved"
"There's more to love than touch, Cher`e, 'bout time someone taught you that" he answered.
Rogue pulled away from him, moving to the other side of the bed and getting up, she crossed her arms with her back still to him, "Better to 'have loved and lost than not loved at all', right? And 'those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it', well Ah learned from my history, and Ah won't let what happened to Cody happen to anyone else" with that she left the room.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------
Wanda headed down to the kitchen, she had vowed not to risk running into Toad, but she was dying of hunger and needed to eat.
She glanced cautiously around the energetic room, Lance, Fred, Peter, Kitty, Irene, and St. John were the only ones in there.
Kitty was flirting with Peter, Lance was staring at them with an unreadable expression, and Fred and St. John were wolfing down a box of doughnuts Irene had placed on the table.
Wanda put on her usual scowl and fell into her usual silence, going over and scanning through the fridge.
She pulled out a few ingredients for a sandwich and absently began making the snack while contemplating recent events, mostly the death of her father, she had finally decided what she was going to do, stay with Mystique and the new Brotherhood, she really had no better option.
Wanda would ever join the X-men, too many preps and goody-goodies, it was either stay on her own or fight for Mystique, she really didn't care either way, she'd gotten over one major hurtle in her life, and it had given her the thing she'd most craved, peace.
No more surges of unprovoked anger, no more unwanted frustration, the moment she had seen her father breathe his last breath, all those self- tormenting emotions died with him.
The Scarlet Witch looked up as Rogue came into the kitchen followed by Gambit, The two Goth girls made eye contact, exchanging silent words as Rogue made herself lunch while Remy leaned against a counter watching her.
*What's up with him?* Wanda projected, *We had a little chat about there being more to love than touch* Rogue answered.
Wanda's scowl deepened, *He never gives up does he?* she heard Rogue's mental sigh, *He understands me, well at least as much as anyone can, but Ah'm not gonna let him go any further than he already has, once he gets bored of me he'll move onto the next skirt*
Wanda smirked, *Men like him always do* she glanced over at the snake charmer, who was still studying Rogue, *But you might want to give this one a chance, there's just something about him that makes me think he'll stick around*
Just then, an unwelcome voice interrupted the telepathic conversation she was having with her friend, "There you are, Snookums" a grinning Todd hopped up beside her, The Scarlet Witch growled, "Back off, wart face"
"Awww, I thought you'd be happier now that Mags is dead, oh well, I can cheer you up, Cuddlebumps" he continued as Wanda sat next to Pyro, Rogue sat across from her and shot over a sympathetic look.
"Leave me alone you disgusting, slime infested, skunk smelling, idiot!" despite her insult Todd wouldn't back down, he flicked his tongue out in front of her, "Like, ewwww, GROSS!" Kitty screeched.
"I think you need a lesson in manners" St. John stepped in, grabbing Todd by his collar and pushing him against the nearest wall, "It ain't nice to annoy a shiela like that, mate, if you know what's best for you, you'll high tail it out of here 'fore I burn your little hide"
Toad gulped, "Y-yea, sure" Pyro let him go with a smug smile, then he turned to Wanda, "Let me know if he gives you any more trouble"
All three girls raised their eyebrows and exchanged amused glances, *This is new* Wanda thought, *Things could get interesting around here*
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------
(A/N: Again I'm sorry for the wait, my muse was taking a sick day---make that month, I had a serious case of writer's block, thanks to all of you who reviewed:)
Wolviesfan: Now that you mention it, Logan was acting OOC, guess I missed that when I re-read and edited my chap, in future parts I'll try to get his character down better.
(A/N: Love ya'll, thank you soooo much for RnRing my fic, sorry this took sooooo long to update) ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------
Rogue, Kitty, and Wanda sat in Rogue's room discussing how they would break the news of Magneto's death to Pietro, Mystique had gone back to Bayville to 'reclaim' the old Brotherhood and if she was feeling gracious enough, she would leave it up to the girls to tell them what happened.
The Acolytes were staying at the house still, surprisingly on Irene's insistence, this, of course, made Kitty practically ecstatic.
Wanda had been acting weird, ever since she woke up she seemed to be on auto-pilot, spaced out, as if she couldn't believe it was over, she'd spent so much time on revenge and increasing hatred towards her father, now she doesn't know where to go from here.
Rogue was solemn, taking all this in, finally deciding that she should be the one to speak Pietro about it, neither of her friends were in any condition to carry out the task.
"Ah'll tell him" her announcement fell on death ears, she sulked in the silence, thinking on her own problems, *What a nice, depressed, mentally dysfunctional team we make*
Well she had to exclude Kitty from the depressed part, the girl was off in la la land, probably wondering what color to paint her and Peter's picket fence house.
So the three stayed like that for a while, until they heard commotion downstairs, Kitty and Wanda both looked pleadingly over at Rogue, who sighed and floated slowly out the door, shutting and locking it behind her.
She took her time coming down into the living room, Gambit, Pyro, and Colossus casually standing or leaning against various parts near the exists, trying to inconspicuously block the old Brotherhood's way out.
Mystique left the room as soon as Rogue entered, Irene was nowhere to be found, *They ain't making this easy on me* she thought grudgingly, she glanced at Quicksilver's confused face, he was obviously wondering when exactly Raven gained permission to boss them around.
"Where's my father" he instantly demanded, Rogue clenched her teeth, deciding to just come out and say it, "He's dead" she didn't offer any explanation, just raced quickly back up to her room, letting the Acolytes deal with the BoM's reaction.
After what seemed like a million long, agonizing hours of silence, there was pounding on her door, Wanda unconsciously scooted farther back on the bed, Rogue winced, Kitty jumped.
"ROGUE!!!"
*Don't kill the messenger!* she shot telepathically, she went to the door and hurridly slipped out, again locking it behind her.
There stood Pietro, his clear blue eyes searching her emerald ones, as if begging it not to be true, Rogue wavered under his gaze, she finally had to look away, this was wrong, it was just wrong.
Without giving it another thought, the Goth reached out and squeezed Pietro's hands with her gloved ones, guiding him into the next room and turned to glare at Remy, warning him not to come in.
Quicksilver dropped to his knees in the middle of the floor, stunned, then the tears came, Rogue knelt beside him, bringing him into an embrace, careful not to make skin contact.
He clung to her like a lifeline, like she had clung to Gambit not so long ago.
It was then Rogue realized something, both Maximoff children had built their lives around their father, in one way or another, everything they did came back to him, one wanted his attention and would give the universe to live up to his expectations, the other wanted to put him through all the suffering she'd done at his hand.
Now, the core of what each teen had wasted their life working on, was gone, there was a void of doubt that settled in the master of magnetism's passing, where would they go from here? How do they build a new foundation out of so much grief and trauma?
Rogue found herself hating the man even more then when he was alive, how could he have done this to his own kids? He'd played them like pawns, they had never known a world that didn't have something to do with him, it would be hard for both to move on.
Eventually, Pietro cried himself to sleep, Rogue lifted him gently with her TK and set him on the bed, taking his shoes off and pulling the covers up around him, she sat on the edge and brushed some hair away from his face.
She leaned forward and lightly brushed her lips on his forehead, feeling the slightest absorption, insuring that he would stay asleep longer then his metabolism usually allowed.
Then she crept quietly out, shutting the door and nearly colliding with Gambit, she saw the questions flash in his eyes but she didn't wanna deal with him right then, so she zipped into her room with Quicksilver's speed before he had a chance to make the tiniest sound.
She saw that Wanda and Kitty had snuck off to their own rooms during the moment she'd been comforting Pietro, she sighed and laid on her bed, falling into her mindscape. She closed her eyes, soaking up the old familiar smells around her, the peacful solitude of that small country home, she was young again, free from humanity, no one but her.
Suddenly, Rogue heard a low chuckle emanating from the deep recesses of her mind, she managed to hold back her tremors when she recognized who it was, she was tugged, once again, through her mindscape, *This shouldn't be happening!* she cursed.
"*No need to worry, my dear, I am simply here to help*"
Rogue highly doubted that, but she knew he wouldn't try to take her body over, he could've at any time, though he never seemed compelled to.
"*What do you want?*" her tone was more wary than harsh, she just realized how exhausted she was from all that'd been going on lately, not really allowing herself a break since she absorbed the person standing before her.
"*You've been stressing too much over the details, I am here to provide you with the full perspective, a bird's-eye-view of your recent predicament*" Mesmero explained.
Rogue frowned, out of confusion and surprise, confused that he would want to help her and surprised that his intentions seemed sincere, "*Why?*"
"*How do I put this?*" he put a finger to his chin and tapped it rhythmatically, Rogue almost had to smile at the childish demeanor the action gave him, he was starting to look more like the college student from his memories.
"*See when you absorbed me*" his voice broke into her musings and she forced herself to become more serious, "*You did me a favor, I would have been forever trapped in Apocalypse's hold, been a mindless puppet, caused the destruction of so much, but you, in a way, rescued me from that personal hell*"
Rogue was taken aback at his words, for a while she couldn't speak, how could her wretched curse, being the tormenting trap for so many psychs, now be someone's liberation?
This was totally different from the usual reaction she got from the people she absorbed, they always tormented her for as long as they could, making her drown in guilt and self-hatred until their voices faded along with her use of their powers.
He smiled a little at her stunned silence, "*So it would only be right if I helped you in your current affairs*" he finished.
The Goth bit her lip, "*What've Ah got to lose?*" she smirked, "*Alright, what exactly have Ah been looking for, Ah was pretty content with life, accepting my powers and all, then Ah cracked*"
"*It's because you never truly came to terms with it, the isolation, the loneliness, and now that he's here, I doubt you ever will*" Mesmero answered.
Rogue scowled, knowing full well who he was talking about, "*What's that Swamp Rat got to do with anything*"
"*He is just like you, pushing his feelings aside until they become too hard to cope with, not dealing with them, always hiding, never letting anyone see who he really is, but most importantly, he's lonely as well, and when you met, the defense broke, and the bond started*"
"*What bond?*" she asked bitterly, "*And how can he be lonely, how could he even know the meaning of the word! No one knows, no one understands, never being able to touch another person, wanting to, taking one low blow after another when you see the others kissing, holding, caressing without anything keeping them back, then having the thing you want most turned into some horrific nightmare! Violation is even worse than isolation! How would he understand, the guy probably lost his virginity at fourteen with the way the girls attract to him like a magnet!!!*"
Mesmero was unfazed by her outburst, he let her calm down before continuing, "*You will never know how he can understand if you keep pushing him away, can't you see? The reason why it was so easy to open up to him, when with any other person you would have turned away, that's why it didn't hurt to show him your scars*"
Rogue was hardly convinced, and she would not take the risk, sure, it hadn't hurt, but what if Mesmero was wrong, she would be putting herself in a vulnerable position, and she hated that concept worse than any other twisted option the universe had to offer.
"*What Ah did was a mistake, Ah wasn't thinking clearly, for Christ sakes he's the enemy! Back to my first question, what bond?*"
"*You feel him, even without my---your powers, it's too late for you to start closing off now, just try it, come out from the mask before it consumes you*"
Rogue threw her hands up in exasperation, "*See? This is one of the many reasons why Ah never open up to anybody, it gets turned into such a big friggin' deal, is it such a crime?! Ah slipped, poured my heart out to the first person that came along, and it ends like this, why do my demons insist on tormenting me?*"
Mesmero sighed, "*As I said, you are one in the same, that is why you've connected*"
"*Urrggh, let me back into the real world*" she didn't want this to happen, she was never going to let some ego inflated Cajun waltz passed her barriers into everything she had worked so hard to keep hidden, just because Apocalypse's former flunky decided to go mentor and evaluate her ever confusing life.
He was reluctant to follow her command, but knew that he was getting nowhere by keeping her here until she took his advice, so he complied, hoping to find another way to show her.
Rogue ran out the door the second her eyes opened. Thoughts running through her brain a mile a minute, she tried to shake the cold feeling that crept through her, her mask was perfectly in place.
BAMF, Kurt grabbed her and soon they were outside, a few miles away from the house, surrounded by rolling hills and open fields.
"KURT!" she glared at him in annoyance, but he stood his ground, "I vant answers, sister"
Rogue sank to her knees in exasperation, letting her brother wrap an arm around her shoulders, he didn't hesitate in cutting to the chase, "Vhy are you vith our mother?"
She never had given him an explanation, she hadn't known herself, now it was only semi-clear to her, "Ah couldn't stay any longer, Kurt, Ah didn't find all that Ah needed at the Institute"
"Vhat do you need?" he was concerned, and a little hurt that she hadn't confided in him earlier, she glanced away, then gestured around her, "This" she said, "Ah need a place where Ah can deal with my problems, Ah don't know who my demons are anymore, all Ah know is Ah can't keep handling them the way Ah have been or Ah'll break down again"
He sighed, "Does this mean you vont be coming back?" she shook her head, "Ah will, just not anytime soon" *Maybe Mesmero was right about one thing, I should get out of my mask before it consumes me, that was how I used to do things and look where it's gotten me*
"Alright" he said, a hint of sadness in his voice, "But I'll be coming to check on you guys, everyone's worried"
Rogue smiled, *Whoa, my face feels like it forgot how to do that* "So long as you don't bring Logan here in a slice-and-dice mood"
He grinned, then gave her a mock serious expression, "I might if any of those idiots in there lays a finger on you"
Her smile widened, "Aren't Ah so lucky to have a brother" they embraced before he teleported away.
Rogue headed back towards the house, feeling a little better and less confused, now that she realized why she had truly accepted Mystique's offer, praying that she would know how to handle this, wondering if maybe now the constant self-torment would stop.
She felt warm, the ice on her soul had somewhat melted.
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Remy had to do a double take as Rogue came back inside, she actually looked happy for once, not exactly light-hearted, just temporarily happy.
"Mon Dieu, what have you done with Rogue?" he looked at her comically, wide- eyed and jaw-dropped.
She rolled her eyes but the small lift at the corners of her mouth remained, "Do me a favor and throw yourself off a cliff, Swamp Rat"
He flashed her that sexy smirk, "Anything for the lady, but I was thinkin' something more romantic" he raised an eyebrow suggestively.
She stood in front of him for a moment, arms crossed, giving him the once over as if she were considering the unspoken offer.
He was about to produce another witty comment when she uncrossed her arms and proceeded to walk proudly by him without a second thought, at least that's what it seemed, then he felt her fist make contact with his stomach and he doubled over, she grinned and left him to wallow in pain.
St. John conveniently happened to walk in at the same time this action took place, and he unceremoniously fell to the floor laughing, "So much for...the..Ragin' Cajun" he managed to gasp out before exploding into another round of giggles.
"I just have to work on this femme a bit, I still be great with the women, 'sides, I love a challenge" he said in his defense.
"Yea, sure mate" Pyro said after gaining his composure and grinning at his annoyed companion, "I think you're just losin' your touch and don't wanna admit it"
Remy smirked, but had learned a while ago that any debate with the insane Aussie was pointless, *Besides, I got me a girl to charm* he thought with a wicked grin, making the short trek to Rogue's room.
He found the door slightly ajar and stuck his head in, she was lounging back on her bed reading a book, quickly concealing it when she noticed she had a visitor.
"Ever heard of knockin'" she lashed out angrily, sitting up, but he saw through her mask as a cover for her embarrassment, he smiled, that could be used to his advantage.
"Where's the fun in that?" he asked, coming to sit beside her, she reflexively scooted farther away, he easily moved in further, tactfully cornering her, she frowned but made no movement to push him away just yet.
"What were you reading?" he said mock conversationally, he'd already seen the title of the book, noting it was the cause of her previous embarrassment.
"You tell me" she stated, turning to face him, leaning against the headboard, her action left her in a vulnerable position, she was daring him to get closer, challenging him to find out the consequences.
Remy was surprised by this change in behavior, although something told him he shouldn't be, it had been subtly going on since she'd shown up that fateful morning at the mansion door after spending the night in the woods, she didn't seem so afraid of possible contact anymore, the romance novel she'd been reading didn't interest him now, he could use it as blackmail later.
"Why were you out that night, Cher`e?"
Rogue's eyes widened slightly, "What are you talkin' about, Cajun?" he gave her a look, "You know full well, mon amour" *Whoa, where did THAT come from!?* his mind went on the instinctive defense.
Rogue was as stunned by his choice of endearment as he was, but she shrugged it off, categorizing it as one of his many, to-impress-the-ladies, lines, she returned to the subject at hand, "Ah.....uhhhhhhh" she caught his intense gaze and tried not to squirm.
*Damn, why can't I think of a good lie?* her mind shouted a few reasons, she ignored them, knowing that if she said anything the truth would spill out, just looking at him made her want to tell him everything.
So she opted for silence, Remy shifted on the bed, scooting so close they were barely inches apart.
Rogue tried to not get lost in his gaze and the warmth emanating from his body, she broke eye contact, "Touch shouldn't hurt" she whispered, an ache rising in her throat.
"You wouldn't understand, Ah've wanted ta touch for a pathetically long time, but those bastard guards made my first intimate contact a living hell. Ah guess Ah should be grateful for that in some twisted, sick way, it showed me that Ah would never be able to feel loved or wanted or close to another person, that even without my power Ah'd be just someone the world shoved in a corner until the needed to use me for their personal gain" "Cher`e" he whispered, he noticed she wasn't crying, in fact she had a calm acceptance on her face, that frightened him worse than any other reaction he wished he'd gotten to her soul pouring, she was actually telling herself she was worthless.
He made her look at him, his hands clamped gently but firmly on her shoulders, "Quit telling yourself those things, Rogue, I know what it feels like to have touch hurt, I used to be just an orphan livin' on the streets of New Orleans, the only way to earn money was to be a thief, or...." he trailed off, knowing she would catch his meaning.
Rogue looked down, her hair falling in front of her face, "Ah know Ah'm not the only one with problems, Cajun" she glanced back up, "But how many people can say they've never, physically, felt loved"
"There's more to love than touch, Cher`e, 'bout time someone taught you that" he answered.
Rogue pulled away from him, moving to the other side of the bed and getting up, she crossed her arms with her back still to him, "Better to 'have loved and lost than not loved at all', right? And 'those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it', well Ah learned from my history, and Ah won't let what happened to Cody happen to anyone else" with that she left the room.
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Wanda headed down to the kitchen, she had vowed not to risk running into Toad, but she was dying of hunger and needed to eat.
She glanced cautiously around the energetic room, Lance, Fred, Peter, Kitty, Irene, and St. John were the only ones in there.
Kitty was flirting with Peter, Lance was staring at them with an unreadable expression, and Fred and St. John were wolfing down a box of doughnuts Irene had placed on the table.
Wanda put on her usual scowl and fell into her usual silence, going over and scanning through the fridge.
She pulled out a few ingredients for a sandwich and absently began making the snack while contemplating recent events, mostly the death of her father, she had finally decided what she was going to do, stay with Mystique and the new Brotherhood, she really had no better option.
Wanda would ever join the X-men, too many preps and goody-goodies, it was either stay on her own or fight for Mystique, she really didn't care either way, she'd gotten over one major hurtle in her life, and it had given her the thing she'd most craved, peace.
No more surges of unprovoked anger, no more unwanted frustration, the moment she had seen her father breathe his last breath, all those self- tormenting emotions died with him.
The Scarlet Witch looked up as Rogue came into the kitchen followed by Gambit, The two Goth girls made eye contact, exchanging silent words as Rogue made herself lunch while Remy leaned against a counter watching her.
*What's up with him?* Wanda projected, *We had a little chat about there being more to love than touch* Rogue answered.
Wanda's scowl deepened, *He never gives up does he?* she heard Rogue's mental sigh, *He understands me, well at least as much as anyone can, but Ah'm not gonna let him go any further than he already has, once he gets bored of me he'll move onto the next skirt*
Wanda smirked, *Men like him always do* she glanced over at the snake charmer, who was still studying Rogue, *But you might want to give this one a chance, there's just something about him that makes me think he'll stick around*
Just then, an unwelcome voice interrupted the telepathic conversation she was having with her friend, "There you are, Snookums" a grinning Todd hopped up beside her, The Scarlet Witch growled, "Back off, wart face"
"Awww, I thought you'd be happier now that Mags is dead, oh well, I can cheer you up, Cuddlebumps" he continued as Wanda sat next to Pyro, Rogue sat across from her and shot over a sympathetic look.
"Leave me alone you disgusting, slime infested, skunk smelling, idiot!" despite her insult Todd wouldn't back down, he flicked his tongue out in front of her, "Like, ewwww, GROSS!" Kitty screeched.
"I think you need a lesson in manners" St. John stepped in, grabbing Todd by his collar and pushing him against the nearest wall, "It ain't nice to annoy a shiela like that, mate, if you know what's best for you, you'll high tail it out of here 'fore I burn your little hide"
Toad gulped, "Y-yea, sure" Pyro let him go with a smug smile, then he turned to Wanda, "Let me know if he gives you any more trouble"
All three girls raised their eyebrows and exchanged amused glances, *This is new* Wanda thought, *Things could get interesting around here*
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(A/N: Again I'm sorry for the wait, my muse was taking a sick day---make that month, I had a serious case of writer's block, thanks to all of you who reviewed:)