SEEING THE LIGHT
After calling his team and sending them over to Farron's residence to oversee the local police checking for any clues regarding the kidnapping, Donovan followed the ambulance taking Kara to the hospital emergency room. She was immediately admitted to the psychiatric ward of the hospital. He waited alongside an impatient Farron for the doctor's permission to see her. His heart went out to his brother, who was torn on where he should be at that moment.
"What's happening with the twins," Farron whispered as Donovan sat down beside him.
"The team will keep me posted, brother. They've gone to your house to see if there has been any contact from the kidnappers," he explained quietly.
"I should be out looking for them, doing something…but I cannot leave Shel." Distraught, he buried his face in his hands.
"Kara needs you, and there is nothing to do now but wait while the authorities scour the city," Donovan assured him, placing a caring hand on his brother's shoulder.
"Mr. Donovan." Both Donovan and Farron looked up to see the doctor standing in the doorway. "You may see Mrs. Donovan now; however, I must warn you that she is still unresponsive."
Farron nodded absently and wasted no time in entering Kara's room with Donovan. He vaguely registered the fact that the doctor also followed them into the room and remained off to the side in order to observe Kara's behavior and reactions. Farron went immediately to her and sat on the edge of the bed, taking her hand in his. What little hope he had harbored was dashed quickly when he looked into her eyes. She stared straight ahead with no sign of life in them.
Donovan looked on in silence, watching the heart-wrenching scene before him. He felt a wealth of sympathy for them, and yet, the investigator in him knew that Kara might have just enough information locked inside her mind that may be of some help in finding the twins. If she couldn't be reached, the babies might never be found. He paced the room slowly while Farron sat helplessly beside his wife, talking to her, trying to coax her from her self-imposed exile.
"Kara," Donovan said quietly, approaching the bed. "Kara…it's time to come back." He shook his head as he pulled up a chair next to the bed and leaned forward. She was still unresponsive and he wasn't looking forward to being the one who broke through her barrier. Harsh reality would be his tool in breaking through to her. There were two possible outcomes to his approach; he would reach her or she would sink even farther into her world.
"Frank…"
Donovan held up his hand, silencing his brother. "Kara. I know where you are and it's a much easier place to deal with than reality. But the hard truth is that Brittany and Bryce were kidnapped and you may be the only one with any information." He stared deeply into her eyes and waited a few moments, hoping to see some kind of reaction, but none came. "Stay in that place, Kara, and it may mean that you never hold your children again." He stood and moved to the window, staring through the glass as he mentally searched for a way to reach his sister in-law.
"Considere este…"
Donovan turned toward the sound of the tiny voice. His eyes locked with Farron's for a brief moment before focusing on Kara. She blinked slowly as she repeated the two Spanish words over and over.
"Consider what, querida," Farron asked quietly. When she again repeated the words, he turned his attention to his brother. "Frank, Kara cannot speak Spanish. An endearment here or there, but that is all."
Donovan nodded and moved closer to the bed. "What else, Kara? What else can you tell us?" He watched as her eyes closed completely and her grip tightened slightly on her husband's hand. She was coming around.
"Considere este un desembolso inicial en su deuda de esposo, puta."
A tortured sound escaped Farron's throat as the words sunk into his brain. Down payment. Husband's debt. His children were taken as punishment for his past misdeeds. His brother's intuition had been correct, after all.
"Farron?"
Farron raised his eyes to meet his brother's. "You were right, Frank. You were right all along. And now my children are gone."
"I'm so…so sorry," Kara whispered through newly formed tears. She fell into Farron's embrace. She had heard the words Farron had said to his brother, and, although they did not register at that moment, they would come back to haunt her.
"It's not your fault, love.
Please, don't…" he began, stroking her hair comfortingly.
"Kara," Donovan interrupted. "Did you see who did this?"
She shook her head and pulled away from her husband to look at her brother in-law. "No, they came up from behind. I only remember that voice…"
* * *
Leaving his brother and sister in-law to themselves for a moment, Donovan stepped outside to check out his text and voice messages. He noticed that all but one were from Loralei. He wouldn't call her back, not here. This would have to wait until after he got home. If I ever make it there tonight. The one not from Loralei was familiar enough. It was from the Central Office, probably Shoemaker's direct line. Preparing for what he knew was a major battle, he set that number aside as well. He had moved to go back into the hospital when his phone beeped as an incoming text message came in. Expecting it to be Loralei again, he glanced down and saw that it was from Shoemaker. Get to my office as soon as you receive this message. Donovan was tempted to tell Shoemaker to fuck off. His family needed him. However, he knew what Shoemaker wanted to yell at him about, he might as well face the music and tell his boss to fuck off in person. Losing his composure wasn't normally a part of his character, but he was damned tired of Shoemaker. Pausing only a moment, he slipped back inside.
His brother still sat beside his wife, both of them looking lost and shocked. Yet, it was more than just shock. It was disbelief. He didn't know how he would feel in the same situation, but he could easily feel his brother's pain radiating off him in waves. "Farron?" Reluctantly, Farron turned his attention from his wife to his brother. "I must go for a little while," he began. "I'll see you both when you come home." He saw the desperate look in their eyes, both wanting to hear that everything was going to be okay. For once, he wished he could tell them that, but he didn't want to mislead them. "We'll find them," Donovan said before leaving.
Donovan took a deep breath before he entered Shoemaker's office. It was rare that he had to come here, but when he did, he gritted his teeth. He knew that he would leave angry and with a pounding headache. He wouldn't dare sit down until Shoemaker told him to, and with slight disinterest, Donovan focused his eyes on his boss. The man never liked it when Donovan chose to stand before him. Shoemaker was a good two or three inches shorter than Donovan, he was balding, and a bit on the pudgy side. As of late, his eyes had gone to pot, and he had to wear a pair of round frame glasses. Shoemaker had always held a little bit of jealousy and animosity toward Frank Donovan. Not many people knew it, but Donovan had been offered the job when Shoemaker was hired. He had turned it down flat.
"Sit down, Frank," Shoemaker said, his voice almost in a commanding mode.
Reluctantly, Donovan sat in the chair nearest him. He stared at the other man blankly. "Why did you call me down? If you don't know, I'm needed elsewhere."
"I heard, Frank," he said. "You have used the team at least twice in your own personal endeavors. The first two times involved your wife. This one involves your brother. It's too close to you Frank, and I don't want you to be involved at all. Further, I am not giving you clearance to work on this. If you put the team in, you will be reprimanded duly, as will the other members. Am I making myself clear?"
Donovan bored his eyes into Shoemaker's face, wishing desperately that he could make him disappear. "Then I suggest you start preparing the paperwork now."
"Donovan, what is this? No one called your team in. The FBI can handle this. Your team cannot jump every time you have a personal problem at home. If you want to get involved, take a leave of absence and do it on your own. You're not a K & R man anymore."
He shook his head incredulously. He had the greatest desire to launch himself at Shoemaker, but that would only create more problems than it would solve. "This is a kidnapping, even you can see this. How many times have you sent orders down for us to work kidnappings? I don't care if you'll give us clearance or not. We're in it. As I see it, you have three choices in this deal. The first, of course, is to reprimand and suspend my team and I. The second is to fire me right now. Your third and final choice is to either assign us to work this case or I go over your head."
* * *
Kara was curled up on the sofa as she watched the bustle of activity around her. She recognized Donovan's team, who seemed to be heading up the investigation. The one named Cody brought her a cup of tea and fumbled with an attempt at conversation, but Kara was not up for company or conversation. Unless they were coming to tell her that her children would soon be placed in her arms, she really had nothing to say to them.
She set the untouched cup of tea on the end table and surveyed the room. Electronic equipment littered the living room and multitudes of people were tripping over themselves. She listened intently, hearing the negative thoughts from one person or another. As the time passed, they said, the less likely her children would be recovered.
She glanced across the room to see her brother in-law talking to her husband and was unprepared for the slam of harsh emotions that assaulted her. At that moment, she felt the greatest desire to rush across the room and beat the lives out of both of them. You were right, Frank. You were right all along. Her eyes narrowed as the Donovan brothers realized she was watching them and began to cross the expanse of the living room to join her. She sat up in anticipation, not quite sure how she would react to them, but knowing she was feeling less than docile, even after the sedative the doctor had given her.
"Querida," Farron began, sitting next to her. "Perhaps you should…"
"Should what, Farron," Kara asked sharply. "Go upstairs? Why would I need to do that? So you can continue to keep things from me?"
Donovan raised a brow at her obvious animosity. It was the last thing he expected from her. "Kara…"
Kara stood quickly to face him. It was a mismatch and she had to look up at him to say her piece. "And you…you're no better. You both disgust me." She pushed past Donovan and moved toward the doorway. A very surprised duo followed her into the kitchen where there was more privacy.
"Kara, what is it," Farron demanded, holding his own temper.
"What is it," she asked incredulously. "Did you think I was unable to process what you said back in the hospital?" When she received nothing but blank stares from each of them, she shook her head. "I admit, the drugs have slowed my thinking process, but you two are a pair. How long have you been keeping this from me? That Farron's past enemies were after our children?"
"I had no real proof, Kara. Nor did I know anyone was after the children," Donovan explained. "I was basically just checking things out to make sure all the players were where they belonged. I was worried."
"Apparently," she spat. "And why was I not told? I would never have taken the twins out like that if I'd have known they were in danger!"
"God, love. We had no idea. Frank checked around while we were in Florida and nothing out of the ordinary turned up," Farron assured her as he moved closer, intent on taking her into his arms.
Kara's eyes widened at the resounding smack that she heard and realized only after she felt the sting in her palm that she had slapped Farron across the face. "Florida? This is why you insisted on that little holiday? The lies started with Florida?"
Farron's hand went to his cheek reflexively. He could feel the imprint of her palm developing on his face. He had never seen her so angry in all the time they had been together. "Shel…I never meant to keep anything from you. It just seemed wrong to worry you unnecessarily," he explained weakly.
"Unnecessarily? Does the abduction of our children qualify as unnecessarily," she screamed. "I cannot believe the gall of the both of you! I want you out…out of my sight…and out of this house!"
"Kara, be reasonable," Donovan interjected calmly.
"Sorry, dear brother in-law, but the time for reasonable was when I had a choice in the matter. My babies are gone and in God knows whose hands and I don't think I have a reasonable bone in my body right now." She backed up against the counter as Farron approached her. She never thought she would see the day when she couldn't stand the sight of her husband, but that day had arrived. He had kept things from her, things that might have prevented the loss of their children and he saw nothing wrong with what he had done. Beyond that, there was the reason for the attack on their children. Her eyes narrowed to thin slits as she glared at him. "This is your fault, Farron Donovan. Your need to have money and the easy life; the lowlifes that you associated yourself with, your choices have led to this moment in our lives. I won't ask you again. I won't ask you at all. Get out of my sight and take your damn brother with you!"
Shocked and more than destroyed, Farron wanted to continue trying to get through to Kara, but Donovan knew there was no use. Repeating a litany of 'come on Farron, let's go, Farron,' Donovan dragged his brother along. At first, Farron resisted, but then as soon as the words sank in, he realized that Kara was right. His past had come back to haunt them, to hurt them. Mutely, he followed his brother toward the exit. Donovan stopped briefly to tell the team that he would return later, hopefully after Kara calmed down. She meant nothing that she said, he knew, but she was allowing her grief to rule her. The space between the two houses wasn't that far, but every now and then, Farron would stop and look back, turning as if he wanted to leave his brother behind and go to his wife. When he saw this, Donovan simply clasped his hand on his brother's shoulder and pushed him forward. Right now, it was best to leave Kara alone.
"Frank…I must…must go back," Farron uttered as soon as the two men set foot on his brother's property. "I can't leave her like this."
"Give her some time, Farron. She's grieving and nothing makes sense."
Farron shook his head. There were tears prickling his eyes, threatening to flood out at any second. "She's right, you know," he said cryptically. "This is my fault. I let my happiness blind me. I…I thought I was immune, as immune as the courts said I was. They want me to pay, Frank, and I swear to God that I'll die for my babies if that's what it takes."
"You won't have to do that." Donovan tightened his grip on Farron's shoulder, trying to transmit as much reassurance as he could. "Go inside. Try to rest."
The two brothers entered the house and Donovan was hoping to steer Farron toward the stairs, but he veered off instead. On automatic now, he went into the den and collapsed onto the couch. It was the couch that converted to a hideaway bed. It was the bed in which he made love to Kara the first time. It might have seemed bizarre or dumb, but he felt close to her here. It mattered very little that he had failed her and caused her this pain. He meant every word he said. He would lay down his life in an instant for Brittany and Bryce.
Although he didn't think it was such a grand idea, Donovan left his brother alone. He was sure Loralei would have a ton of questions for him. It was at that moment he began to feel his own eating guilt. As he expected, his wife was awaiting him upstairs. The moment she laid eyes on him, she opened her mouth. He held his hand up for the briefest of moments. Before they talked, there was something he had to do. Knowing it was going to scare the hell out of them, Donovan went to each of his children and hugged them against his chest until he thought he would go mad from his love for them. The unexpected hugs wakened them, but it didn't take long to quiet them down again. After he left each bedroom, he closed the doors behind him. Loralei was waiting expectantly, anxiously.
"There have been no names mentioned, but it's all over the news," Loralei said.
Donovan focused his eyes on his wife. She was sitting in the middle of the bed with her legs crossed before her. "It was likely someone from Farron's past who did this."
"How's Kara? Farron?"
He caressed the nape of his neck and approached the bed. He sat down with his back to her. "Not good. Kara demanded that Farron and I leave the house. She…ah… heard us talking at the hospital and found out that I had been poking around."
Loralei sighed. "I see."
He shook his head, but wouldn't turn to look at her. "I never felt right about this. I should have warned them to be more alert, more careful, but I didn't. I've been in this business for years now and I knew better. It's much better to be oblivious than deal with reality, you know." His last comment was made through a bitter chuckle. "If this weren't enough, Kara threw her husband out because of something I advised him to do months ago. You tried to tell me, but I didn't listen." He turned to look at her. There were tears shining in his eyes. "So, I suppose you're entitled to a bit of 'I told you so.'"
If his comment had been made two months ago, it would have pissed her right off, but not this time. He wasn't being sarcastic or arrogant. His words were riddled with guilt and grief. He had put on a different hat now, the one he wore only in front of her. She hesitated half a second before she went to him. At first, she thought he might deny her, because he was definitely still in work mode somewhere deep inside, but he didn't. He buried his face in the soft flesh of her throat. He felt hot and fevered to the touch. She assumed that he had been holding this inside since he heard of the kidnapping, always trying to maintain his icy exterior. It was the only way he could cope sometimes.
"Frank, I would never say that to you. You did everything you could and you had your reasons as to why you wanted to hold back."
He drew away just the slightest to look into her eyes. "I kept thinking all day long, 'thank God it isn't me.' He's my brother, Loralei, and those babies are my niece and nephew. How could I think something like that? How could I be so selfish to…"
"No," she said, placing two fingers briefly to his lips. "You're human. It runs through everyone's minds. You don't have to feel as if this is your fault. It isn't even Farron's fault. As far as Kara is concerned, people do weird things when they're grieving, and she has to lash out. If she didn't, she would completely lose it. I have to keep saying this to you, Frank, and I'm hoping that you'll eventually take it to heart. You're not superhuman. You can't do everything. But I know you, my love, you will do everything in your power to bring those babies back."
--To be continued…