Author: Angie
Email: AngieSuth@aol.com
Title: The Dangers of Clandestine Assignation
Characters: CJ/Toby
Rating: PG
Summary: I bent down and looked through the keyhole. And that was when I saw it.
Disclaimer: Not mine at all.
Spoilers: Absolutely none
Feedback: Always appreciated.
A/N: Thanks to Kimberly. She knows why. And, boy, did we laugh. Bibi - congrats on those results and Bon Voyage!
Kate – I hope you can lift your head high enough for a chuckle too. Roll on March.
Light relief. This is what this is - and not terribly good light relief. I can blame no-one but myself. It's been one of those days.
*
The Dangers of Clandestine Assignation
*
Josh turned the handle to the small basement room and pushed. Nothing. Pushed harder, with a shoulder this time. Still nothing.
"Damn. I'm sure that this door isn't normally kept locked, maybe if I can just see …"
He bent to peer through the keyhole. And screamed …
*
CJ and Donna were just finishing lunch in CJ's office, when Josh burst through the door.
"It was horrible, you've got to come …"
Donna sighed, "Oh no, he's been at the candy again." She stood and smoothed her skirt, deftly depositing any crumbs into her hand and then into Josh's pocket without him noticing.
CJ smiled. This woman had class - and a mind that was stunningly and reassuringly similar to her own. "Try not to hyperventilate, Josh. You are not a well man, remember?"
Josh paused long enough to look indignant, then worried and then confused. "Not well? I'll have you know that I am a fine specimen of manhood, in peak condition, completely capable of …"
"Shut it, Josh. We've heard it before." Donna barely honored him with a glance and CJ was lost in admiration once again.
Josh stuffed his hands in his pockets. "Well, if I shut it, then you won't want to know what I've just seen …" His eyebrow lifted suggestively and he bit his lip.
Donna drained her glass of water and looked at him, "That's just about right."
Josh slumped against the door.
"Oh for goodness sake, Lyman, tell us about it." CJ couldn't hold out any longer. She knew that the pair in front of her could keep this up for days, if not weeks, but her curiosity was piqued.
Josh grinned in victory and perched on the edge of the desk. "Well, I was just down in the basement when I remembered that Leo wanted me to check on the state of one of the old rooms down there – don't ask me what for – I just do as I'm asked."
"Oh yeah? Since when?"
Josh threw Donna his best disdainful look. "If you're sure you want me to go on? Okay, well, I found the place no problem, but when I tried to open the door it was locked."
"Whoop de doo!"
"Look, do you want to hear this or not?"
"Oh yes, Josh, but do you mind cutting to the interesting part? I have things to do."
CJ had had enough. "Right, that's it. Either you tell us what is happening or you leave. Now." She looked from Josh to Donna, peering over her glasses, "And you are not helping."
"Sorry." Donna had the grace to blush.
CJ waved her hand. "Out with it …"
"Well, after I had tried to force the door a few times," a quick look at his assistant who was now sitting demurely on the chair, "I thought maybe that there was something jammed behind the door, so I bent down and looked through the keyhole. And that was when I saw it."
"WHAT?" CJ virtually screamed at him.
"It was horrible. All I could see was a mouth fringed with hair!"
*
CJ left Donna comforting a hysterical Josh and, reassuring them that she was more than match for any beast, human or otherwise, made her way down to the basement.
The door was indeed locked. Josh had been right. CJ did what any reasonable woman would do in her current situation.
She knocked.
She knocked five times exactly, then counted to three and knocked twice more.
The door opened a crack with a satisfying creak. CJ glanced over either shoulder before slipping inside and closing the door behind her. A clunk and it locked.
"What the hell did you think you were doing?" She stood, hands on hips and glared.
"It was the only thing I could think of to stop him looking in." Toby stood and walked over to the door before bending down and placing his mouth over the keyhole. "See?"
"Next time, bring a blanket and cover all the cracks." CJ reached behind her and unzipped her skirt. She smiled as she felt warm hands on her legs, a breath on her thigh.
A long arm stretched out and a pair of scarlet panties covered the door handle.
"But these will do for now."
The End