Wonderland #3 -Kimchi I don't own the stuff with the stuff and the guy with the writing and the- oy vey!

This time it was a small, stout maple tree that Toad materialized in. He appeared stretched out upon one of the branches, long leather trench coat trailing and drooping over the sides. He was looking taller now, and his face was more human than it had been before.

Tabitha called his name, and began to run to his sleeping point. He greeted her by opening one eye, grunting, and closing it.

"So, I see you got the sword of Alice," he murmured. " It's a sword only those with the power to beat the queen can touch." Tabitha stared.

"Really? This is so like a video game! I-wait, I have to beat the queen? What do you mean by beat?"

Toad sighed and pulled himself into a sitting position. "You'll figure it out. Anyway, I'll bet the reason you're here is because the queen wants you to save this place."

"Save it?" Tabitha gripped the sheath of her sword nervously. "Are you making this up?"

"Nope. You see the minds of everyone here are at risk. Lately, the people in the far reaches of the Kingdom have been reporting more cases of insanity among normal people. Entire villages of gibbering idiots."

"A while back, there was talk of the queen using her powers to find someone from the other worlds to help us. I don't see why the person has to be from Mars or wherever, but you're here."

Tabby was silent for a bit. Her eyes were solidly fixed on the ground. "So. how come you're taller?"

Toad's skeptical look peered down from the branches. "Are you afraid of this place?" A smile crept across his face. "You're gonna be here a while. Get used to it."

"I- I feel alone." Her voice cracked with tears. "I don't like being alone." her hands gripped the sword sheath extremely tightly, and it rattled as she shook. "I'm so.weak."

A rather pronounced sigh came from above, and Toad leaned farther over the edge of his branch. "You hate being alone, don't you? To some people, being alone is a weakness. To others, it's salvation. Most humans don't realize that one must be distinguished from others and yet still consume time with other humans."

Tabitha sniffed and wiped her eye. "That's really deep. I never thought Toad would say stuff like that."

Toad flopped back down into a napping position. "Yeah, well in Wonderland, people may be the opposite than they were in your world."

"Anyway, The normally-dormant monsters around the queen's estate have been infected by the madness. That's why you have the sword, but you need backup. Hope you like odd company." Toad pointed down a gravel path, which appeared out of nowhere. They'll be having a tea party, like they always do on Wednesdays. I swear, I'd say the madness got them if they weren't like this before." He trailed off as his leather boots faded out. His body followed, and Tabitha wiped away the last of her tears as she walked down the path.

There was a clearing at the end of the path, and in it was a little house. In the front yard, however, there was a long table set for about twenty people. Seated were two.

Tabitha heard the company before she saw them, as one was laughing her head off, barely breathing between tyrannical hoots. The other sat placidly, sipping tea.

Tabby walked up to the calm one, and was about to ask if she could sit, when the other stopped giggling long enough to energetically shout: "Oh, a guest!"

She raised her hand and the chair nearest to Tabitha shot out. Tabby took a seat, trying to figure where she had seen this girl before. The female, however, had gone right back to giggling her ass off.

"She's like this for days at a time, you know." The male sitting next to Tabitha made his presence known. "And no one, not even me, can figure out what she's laughing about." Something clicked inside Tabitha.

"Lance?"

He turned from his tea. "I think that's my name. A lot of people call me the Mad Hatter, though. I don't know why." He was wearing a green top hat and matching suit. The shirt and tie, however, were of black color, and the dark sleeves reached to cover his fingertips. On the top hat were embroidered some weird symbols, slightly representative to hearts.

" I really don't sell hats, I just wear this one a lot. And I'm not crazy." Lance returned to his tea. "Oh, um.do you remember me? I'm Tabitha." He glanced at her from the corner of his eye.

"You look like an Alice." He was amazingly calm, given the personality of the real world Lance.

"What do you mean? I'm not Alice."

"Well, look at your long hair, your blue school girl dress."

"Umm, I don't have long hair." Tabitha reached behind her head to reaffirm this. Somehow, blonde locks fell to the middle of her back. "Impossible."

"Hey! Twins!" The laughter-obsessed girl stood up, her face a huge smile.

"See?" Her dress was the exact same as Tabitha's, but a deep crimson in color. Her stockings were black, and on her head she wore a ridiculous bunny-ear headband.

"Yay! Twins!" She turned a few circles and sat down, giggling childishly.

"Now, She's crazy," Lance commented. "Her name's Wanda, but everyone calls her the Mad Scarlet Hare, because of the way she dresses, and because of that headband."

"Uh-huh." Tabitha was somehow made nervous by this Lance, probably his lack of emotion. "Um," She began. "Toad said I'm supposed to come here and get 'backup'."

Lance sighed. "Toad? One of the queen's messengers? He means us."

"You?"

"Yeah. I don't look it, but I'm one of the most credible fighters 'round here. Oh, and she's a highly trained sorceress. I'm guessing you're here to help the queen? We can do it."

"Uh-huh." Tabitha was a little un-nerved. A crazy Wanda and a crazy Lance? And she had to save some kind of Kingdom?

About an hour later they set off upon another magically appearing trail, with Wanda in the lead, skipping like a little girl and singing about yogurt. Lance walked a little bit ahead of Tabitha, and was profusely silent. Tabby had tried many times to start a conversation or at least learn what was in the canvas backpack he was wearing. All was to no prevail, as he only answered with one word, never asked questions, and claimed he only carried "supplies". "Moo.Moo! The cows in the yogurt are nice to me."

"Um," Tabby began "Do you know anything about this queen?"

"Barely. They say she has the most powerful spells in the whole kingdom."

".Monkeys in the hay bales and so am I."

"Uh-huh." Just talking was tiring. How long had she been here, anyway? It was getting dark.

"We should make camp here." Lance seemed to read her mind.

A simple tent and a fire were erected before long, and Lance sat, making stew in a large pot that somehow fit into his small backpack. Tabitha sat on the other side of the fire, away from his stare, reading the leather volume of Alice in Wonderland.

Only the pages up to the rabbit hole were filled in before, but now, all the fiascoes up to meeting the Mad Hatter were portrayed.

"But I never met a duchess or anything." Tabitha contemplated her position. "This can't be real."

"You shouldn't doubt things here." Tabby jumped at his voice. How could he hear her talking to herself?

"Anything happens in wonderland. Most of the surrounding environment is influenced by the psyche of the one in it." Lance still stared intently at the bubbling stew, not looking at Tabitha.

"Wh-what do you mean."

"You're afraid of me, no?" He glanced up.

"Um.er.yes." her voice was barely audible at the last part. He smirked, the first emotion to cross his face since she met him.

"Look at the fire." Tabitha nervously stole a glance at the flames. The fire was sputtering, and reducing in size rapidly. Tabitha felt Lance still staring at her, and almost felt herself sweating. The flames sputtered more.

"Oh." There was movement across the fire. In a flash, Lance was sitting beside her.

"How did you." She couldn't finish. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her tight. Breathing in his smell, she felt her face go hot. He let go, and steered her face to the fire. It was a blazing mass, reaching high.

"O-oh, I see." he grinned, and walked over to his stew, as if nothing happened.

The next morning was uneventful, other than the hordes of gigantic bunnies that loomed over the campsite. Lance informed Tabitha that they were a clan of malformed rabbits that made their livings selling shoes.

"Why shoes? None of them are wearing any." They were walking along a trail, Wanda skipping in the lead, singing about candy this time. The rabbits were a couple meters behind, slowly but surely following.

"They don't sell any, so they really live off stealing." He whispered back.

"Will they attack us?"

"Probably." he said. "I guess they think we're monster slayers. Don't ask me how, but monster souls crystallize and are sold for quite a bit."

Tabitha fished through the pockets of her dress. She found the marble and held it up.

"You mean this?" Lance's face showed a strange mix of "what the hell" and "oh, crap". He grabbed the stone and tried to hide it.

"You idiot! Now they think we're rich!" He hissed at her. "How did you get this anyway?"

"I killed a squiggle-thingie."

"A what? Never mind! We were probably gonna fight 'em one way or another." The rabbits had huddled together and seemed to be discussing something.

"Are they gonna attack?" Wanda had skipped over to the pair and peering over Tabitha's shoulder at the rabbits.

"Ooh, bunnies! They're so cute! Do I have to attack one?"

"Only if they attack first. And whisper, they can hear us." Lance hissed at her.

"But they're so cute!" She exclaimed, even louder than before. One of the Rabbits in the front row lunged at the trio, teeth bared. Lance pushed Tabitha down, as was about to do the same to Wanda, when she held her hands up, closed her eyes, and muttered something. A white burst of energy lunged out of her from all sides, knocking the rabbit back at his companions, and throwing Lance to the ground.

Lance grabbed Tabitha's collar and hoisted her up. He dragged a giggling Wanda in his wake while pulling Tabitha by her sleeve.

"Candy.wondrous candy.beautiful as the sun during an eclipse."

"Shut up!" Lance and Wanda verbally battled the singing issue while Tabitha glanced behind her. The entire horde had joined on the chase.

"They're closing in!" She gasped, quite out of breath.

"Damn!" Lance discarded Tabby and Wanda into the grass once more, and changed direction, charging towards the gang.

"What's he doing? Is he crazy?"

"I dunno. But he is the Mad Hatter. This is how he got his nickname." Wanda grinned. "It looks like suicide at first, but then.POW!"

"We should help him." Tabitha got up and pulled the Sword of Alice from its sheath. "Let's go." Wanda nodded. They started running after him.

"This is one kooky dream."