A/N: Okay, so this story doesn't quite have to do with newsies. However, it has more characters from newsies than from anywhere else, as well as containing a number of newsie fanfiction writers. For that reason, I am posting it in the newsies section.
Katrina: * pouring punch into punch bowl * Why do they call it a punch bowl? It's not really a bowl when you think about it. Bowls are small.
Alex: * smirking * Why do they call bowling bowling? You aren't using a bowl for that either.
Lauren: * walks into room * When you finish pondering the meaning of life and snack foods can you please help me get the room straightened up?
Alex: Are we going to help her?
Katrina: No.
Alex: Okay. * grabs bag of chips * So, who all is coming tonight?
Katrina: Gimme some chips * catches bag that Alex tossed * Hmm.. I think Sweets, Frenchy, Fingers, and Sprite. And then of course Brandon and Jono.
Lauren: Sounds good to me.
* doorbell rings *
Alex: I got it. * runs to door * Who is it?
Fingers: Who do you think it is?
Alex: * opens door * Heya.
Fingers: Do I smell popcorn? * pushes past Alex * POPCORN! * runs and steals the popcorn out of Katrina's hands *
Alex: Love you too.
Sweets: * walks through open front door * Yes, we all love you Alex.
Katrina: No, no, no. You all love me. I'm the pretty one.
Brandon: You're all my sexy bitches. * grabs Alex in leech hold * Hey there, sweets.
Sweets: Meow?
Brandon: Not you. Alex. * shakes head in desperation * Never mind.
* phone rings *
* no one moves *
Alex: Okay, okay, I'll get it. Lazy asses. * picks up phone * Hey. * pause * WHAT?!? * pause * That dirty little whore!
Lauren: Why do I get the feeling something isn't going right?
Alex: FUCK!
Lauren: Oh yeah, that'd be why.
Alex: Okay, well, there wasn't anything you could do. * pause * Yeah, all right, seeya in a few. * pause * 6615 Lakehurst. * pause * Just off Hillcrest * pause * Yeah. Take a left. * pause * Okay, bye.
Katrina: Is there a problem?
Alex: Apparently Mark passed out a bunch of flyers about a free beer party at our house and announced it on TV.
Lauren: Mark?
Alex: Do the words "Empire Records" mean anything to you?
Frenchy: Oh shit.
* knock on door *
Alex: No fuckin' way.
Fingers: * gets up and opens doors * Hey Jono.
Jono: Alex, what the hell is going on outside your house?
Alex: * looks out window * SHIT!
[At least twenty cars are visible outside of the house]
Alex: MARK IS GONNA DIE!
Sprite: * walks up to the door * Don't kill him yet. * points to the crowd * Just look at who's outside.
[On the lawn]
Racetrack: What d'ya heah? What d'ya say?
Jack Kelly: Hey! Spot, dis ain't Santa Fe! Ya lied, ya bastahd.
Mush: How else was he supposed ta get ya heah?
[At a different spot on the lawn]
Ted: Bill, dude, this is MOST EXCELLENT!
Bill: Ted, dude, this isn't just excellent.. this is BODACIOUS!!
* bill and ted do air guitar *
Ted: EXCELLENT!
[Another patch of grass]
Snake: * pointing to Avril Lavigne * Man, that girl over there is definitely a * snap *
Verena, Tinka, Odie, Tweety: FLAT CRITTER!
Snake: You're learning quick.
Avril: Flat critter? That could be a good song! Lemme go tell my songwriter to work with my guitarist on it. * thinks * And I could put like some HARDCORE keyboards in it! That'll make people think I'm punk! PUNK RAWK!
Neo: * pulls out gun and shoots Avril * That's better.
Morpheous: You really are the one!!
[back to our favorite hero and heroines.. well.. sorta]
Alex: We are so screwed.
- - - - - - - - -
A/N: Okay, so this came outta no where, but there's nothing wrong with that. I know, I know, I just keep starting new things. But I'm going to finish this one. This is my first attempt at humor and parodies, so please respect it.