Disclamer: Ok we don't own YGO, LOTR, or anything else!
CM and Treno: OMGS!!!!!!!!! WE ARE BACK!!!!!!! (both cry with happiness)
Blade: (starts singing Suteki Da Ne)
Readers: (blink, blink) NO!!!!!! But, somebody said you were dead.
Blade: You should know that the grave could NEVER tame me! (goes into a bout of evil laughter.)
CM: No we've just been banned from the net until we found a job.and now that we've got one were BACK!!!!!!!! Well for the mo it's only me and Treno, Blade's busy at the minute.
Treno: ...
CM: We finished this a day after we were taken off the net soooooooooo it just goes on like we were never banned.okie? Well here it is.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Blade: YAY!!!!!!!!!!! THANK U!!!!!!!!!!! (jumps up and down) Ok, thank u to everyone who gave me the ideas! (gives Karia-Chan and Brittany a mountain of Yami plushies) Awwww hell, take the real one! (Gives them Yami to fight over Blade: I'm banned from him for a while anywho!) Okie!!!!!!!! KT & KH you two helped me so much! Thank you! Gives KH a mountain of Tomb Robber Plushies and KT loadddsssss of cool summer dresses and a Ryou plushie for the hey of it.
Disclaimer: We do not own Yu-Gi-Oh, nor do we own any Final Fantasy game. We don't own the beer games in this chapter either and we don't own the Crash and Cover Crash Duck...unfortunatly.
******************************************
(It's just after lunch and things are pretty normal...well as normal as they're gonna get around here anyway...)
Matthew: DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!! (runs after Anzu with the Millennium Dagger)
Bio Sang: GIVE ME THAT BACK!!!!!!! I NEED IT TO LIVE!
Matthew: How about no, ASSHOLE! (remember he says all Spanish like)
(out in the PE field)
Blade: YOU WILL GO FORTH AND KILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL ANZU AND ANY THAT STAND IN YOUR WAY!
Legolas Plushies: YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Blade: Now goooooooooooooo KILLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!! My pretties! KILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!
Legolas plushies: (march off)
Anzu: (has kidnapped Yugi, and is putting flowers in his hair) WE'RE FRIENDS, WE'RE FRIENDS, WE'RE FRIENDS!
Yugi: Just kill me and get it over with.
Legolas plushies: KILLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!! (kill Yugi because he's in front of Anzu, then they try to kill Anzu)
Anzu: More friends!!!!!!!!
Legolas plushies: RETREAT!!!!!!!!!!!
(somewhere else)
KH: (Panning Link to death in the background, so she can add Legolas to the anti Mary-Sue squad.yes she's been spotted)
CM: Okkkkkkkk....
KT: KEEP IT DOWN!!!! YOUR GONNA WAKE MELANIE AND KIRA UP!
Melanie, Kira, Nuru, Manu and Ebo wake up and start crying
Ottah: (takes a lighter and set's a picture of Joey alight)
CM: NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! Ottah!
Ottah: (eyes twitch)
CM: GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! WHAT'S WRONG WITH HIM!?
KH: Gee maybe it's all the shouting. (still panning Link.)
Blade: (comes in) OUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU KILL THE FRUIT! (hacks Link up while eyes twitch)
KT: Maybe.the twitching things genetic.
CM: Maybe.
(somewhere else outside)
Jasmine: (switches to Diana, hums the wedding march, nearly gets run over by a tanker)
Gimli: Yo I got an order here for 17 gallons of liqudatied sugar!
Diana: WELL IT'S NOT MINE! (bonks him over the head with her staff)
Gimli: No body loves me!!!!!!! (runs off)
Blade: (appears) OUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!! IT'S HERE!!!!! IT'S FINALLY HERE!!!!
Diana: What do you need 17 gallons of liqudated sugar for!?
Blade: For deprogramming my new recruits! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Karia-chan: (comes out of the bushes with one of her Yami plushies) HEY! WERE WAS I LAST CHAPTER!?
Blade: You were fighting over Yami with Brittany!
Karia-chan: Oh yeah.fair enough! I'm off to find Malik.
Blade: (glares at Diana)
Diana: Ummm.I'll go with you Karia-Chan!
Blade: My preciousssssssssssssssss.(gets in the tanker and drives off to the back of the main building) HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
(In some little experiment lab thingie, Legolas (the real one not the plushie) and Aragron have been strapped down to a cold metal table)
Legolas: We've been strapped down to a cold metal table.
Aragron: If I could reach my sword, I'd give you such a stabbing!
Legolas: (Sniffles) Don't you like me any more?
Aragron: You told people I lead children into my ginger bread house!1
Legolas: Attack of the 1's! And that was just a lie.
Aragron: Ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....1
Legolas: Another 1!
Aragron: Thanks captain obvious.
Legolas: No problem!
Blade: SHUT UP! (holds up two needles with little tubes attached to the bottom) I'm gonna pump you two so full of sugar, you won't know what mellinna it is never mind who's Mary Sue!
Legolas and Aragron: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MY LOVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Blade: SHADUP! In a matter of..well let's say an hour give or take.you two wouldn't know Mary-Sue if she sat on your head! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Legolas and Aragron: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Legolas: We're going to be put on a sugar rush!
Aragon: Oh for the love of 1!
Ryga and Baku: (are now ten and playing with the twins, yami's grow up fast huh?)
Kira: (pale skinned and has a white dummy)
Melanie: (darker skinned and has a pink dummy)
(KT's kids are as good as gold....CM isn't so lucky)
Nuru: (brown hair with green eyes, sucking on a chibi Yugi dummy)
Manu: (blonde hair and has brown eyes, so like his father! Is pulling lumps out of Mai's hair)
Ebo: (has blonde hair too and has blue eyes, and is drooling all over Treno)
Ottah: ( has blonde hair as well and grey eyes, and is burning the grass.)
CM: Gahhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!! Little evil buggers!
Nuru: (drops dummy out of her mouth and looks as if to say, "WTF HAVE I DONE YA OL BIDDY!?")
KT: YAY!!!!!!!! PARRRRRRRRRRRRTYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!
Treno: It's not fair!!!! Why do we have to go to bed early!?
CM: Because it gets somewhat weird later on.
KH: (finishes panning Link) Then you'll have to lock Brittany away too.
CM: I'll let Blade do that.
DMG: Where's Marik gone to!?
CM: Ohhhhhh he went for...(thinks, or tries to at least) ummm some equipment.
DMG: What kinda equipment!?
CM: Dunno, you'll have to ask Zidane.
DMG: Ahhhhhhhh.well.
CM: He's orangising the whole thing.so you can almost be garentied that by the end of the night we'll all be pissed.
Treno: Pissssssssssssssssed.
CM: TRENO!
Treno: What!? (toddles off )
Crystal, Kiara-chan and Jasmine: (beating Link up)
Link: My FAIRIES!!!
Blade: (in the lab) BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Legolas and Aragron: (getting sugared up)
Adiana: (comes in) Hey Blade...got Zidane's toy duck yet?
Blade: I completely forgot! Err.would you take over?
Adiana: Sure.(turns the power up to max) BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Zidane: (watching tv in Blade's room) Nothing like the ooooooooold couch.and the ooooooooold television...
TCACCD: (Quacks)
Zidane: And Blade, you can stop all that bad sneaking a ROUND I have the instints of a cat.
Blade: Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.(comes out from behind the door)
Zidane: You wouldn't go and get me a drink would you? Since you're so brilliant at things like that.
Blade: Ok...hey wait a minute! Your just doing the old, "Flatter stupid Blade so she does all the work while I sit on the ooooooooold couch watching the ooooooooold tv" thingie!
Zidane: HEY, BEING ME AIN'T EASY!
Blade:...........one moment pu-lease...(goes into the closet and comes out wearing a Zidane mask and sits on the couch) Oh yeah, I see what you mean! It's sooooooooooooooo much work being a greasy haired slob!
Zidane: Well at least I don't run around with a Spanish action figure of a wrestler no-one's ever heard of or seen before and smash up the furniture while shouting your own made up Spanish! (Goes in the closet and comes out wearing a Blade mask) OUUUUUUUUU LOOKIE I'M A REJECT OF A GOTH AND I LIKE TO PLAY WITH WRESTLING TOYS! (runs around the room with the toy wrestler while smashing into things)
Blade: I DO NOT GET ON LIKE THAT!!!
Zidane: (hits the toy against the closet) STUPID EH! STUPID EH! STUPID EH!
Blade: (grabs the toy off him) I DO NOT DO THAT YOU STUPID EH!
Zidane: Hey here's an idea.if you think being me is soooooooo easy then you become me and I'll have to be you....the first one to act like themselves for an extended period of time has to be the other one's slave for a whole week.
Blade: Okie dokie arta chewy.
Zidane: It's arta chokie.
Blade: I SAID IT'S ARTA CHEWY! AND WHATEVER I SAY IS RIGHT BECAUSE I'M ZIDANE! (jumps on the couch) oh yeah you gotta go do Diana and the Dark Magicians wedding now Bladieu.
Zidane: Bladieo
Blade: Bladieo.
Zidane: WAIT, WHAT DO YOU MEAN!?
Blade: Blade's the only one here that can marry peeps.so you gotta marry Diana and DM.
Zidane:........Ok.....(walks off) Oh I forgot how to breath, help me remember I'm so stupid!
(In one of the gardens, where the wedding is being held.)
Martin: NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
Matthew: (beating his shit in with Marik's baseball bat) FUCK UP YOU ASSHOLE!!!!!!!!!!
Marik: Can we play? PLEASE!?
Matthew: OK!
Marik and DMG: KILL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (both take out baseball bats and beat up Martina I mean Martin.)
Matthew, Marik and DMG: (take Martin off to finish the job)
Yami: (slaps his forehead.)
Mokuba: I guess having Matthew for security wasn't such a bad idea after all.
Zidane: (comes around the corner and stands in front of DM and Diana with a bible) Ok let's get this over with, Dark Magician do you ta-
CM: HOLD IT! WHAT'S GOING ON!? Zidane get down from there, Blade's supposed to be doing this!
Zidane: SHUT IT DUCKY! I AM BLADE!
Freya: (folds her arms) You haven't been sniffing Amarants cocane again by any chance?
Zidane: NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'VE NEVER DONE ANYTHING LIKE THAT YOU STUPID EH! I'M BLADE NOT ZIDANE!
CM: He's been sniffing it.
Treno: Umm where are KT, KH, Ryou and Bakura?
Mai: They all took sore heads.so there having a lay down.the twins are taking care of the babies with Yugi.
Treno: I'll go help too.(leaves)
CM: ZIDANE STOP BEING SUCH AN ATTENTION SEEKING IDIOT AND GET DOWN FROM THERE!
Zidane: I'M BLADE NOT ZIDANE!!! AND IF YOU DON'T SHUT UP THESE TWO WON'T GET MARRIED!
CM: Oh all right.
Zidane: Ok where was I?
????-???: HELLO!!! MISS ME!? (all glass breaks)
All the girls: MARY-SUE!?
All the guys present: (drool, this includes DM btw!)
Anzu: MARY-SUE!!! YAY!(she's somewhere in between a girl and a boy.don't you agree?)
Zidane: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! MUST NOT ACT LIKE SELF.MUST CONTINUE TO ACT LIKE BLADE.MUST NOT FLIRT! (punches himself in the face)
The guys: (are around Mary Sue like flies around shite.)
CM: (totally pissed) JONOUCHI KATSUYA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!! DO YOU WANT TO DIE!?
Joey somehow fights the evil of Mary Sue.
CM: NOW BEG LIKE THE DOG YOU ARE!
Joey: (kneels down with his hands poised like a dogs when it begs and begins yapping.)
Crystal: CM's scary when she's mad.
CM: I'm happy to say that I've learnt at least one thing off Blade that's paid off.
Diana: (crying)
Yami: Which is?
CM: FLASH BACK PLEASE!
(the screen goes all white and blurry)
Blade: Being a dragons great...you wouldn't believe what I save on travel expenses alone! And I can still enjoy the finer things in life...like revenge.
CM: Revenge?
Blade: Listen up, never EVER let men get out of your control, cuz if you do...they accuse you of high treason, and give you one slow and agonising death and then 5000 years later you wake up, realise your soul's been trapped inside a sword, you have one powder puff of a hikari and your stuck in one of the worst places in the world wishing you were in England! And all for what!? Cuz you pushed your good for nothing, rat bastard of a father (who happened to be one of the pharaoh's advisers) into a pit of flesh eating spiders!? And was accused for stabbing your sister in the back with a dagger that had a 17 cm blade!?
(end flashback)
Yami: (nervous laugh)
CM: So apart from learning that my yami was not only a sorceress but a serial killer, I learned that if you let men get out of your control the effects are somewhat...nasty.
Bio Sang: They blamed Blade for that?
Zidane: Yup.
Bio: (shrugs) Well what do you know?
Zidane: (sticks his tonuge out at Bio)
(scene switches to Blade)
Blade: (playing with the CACCD) WHAT!? Go back to the wedding!
(scene switches back to the wedding)
Yugi: (comes with a rocket launcher) PISS OFF, MARY-SUE'S MINE! (blows the other guys away.)
Seto, Yami, Malik, Mokuba and DM: Ouchies.
Mary-Sue: AWWWWWW! MY LITTLE YUGI'S SO STRONG! (skips off with Yugi.)
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ (The evil blue screen of death appears)
CM: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
Treno: WTF DID YOU DO!?
CM: NOTHING! Errrrrrrrr...press any key to continue...(presses a random key, nothing happens.) Umm...
Treno: Ah frig! (hits the reset button) there!
RUNNING SCAN DISC
Treno: Oh great we'll be here all year!
Alex: SCAN DISC!? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA WE HAVE XP!
CM: (acting Alex) Hahahahahahahahahaha none of your fucking stuff is compatible with XP!
Alex: So?
Treno: (face faults)
(Three weeks later scan disc is finished)
STARTING WINDOWS 98'
CM: FINALLY! Password... Fuzzy flying cupcakes.
Treno: What are you using Blade's password for!?
CM: If I use mine the computer might crash again!
Treno: BUT!
(the wallpaper comes up, which is a pic of the FF IX cast.)
CM: Figures.
Treno: Oh well...
CM: Ok.....(clicks on the fan fic folder and then on...) CM'S SHIT!?
Treno: (snigger)
CM: (clicks on it and all of the AMM, TaDoP, KK and a few other of CM's fics come up) OUUUUUUUUU THAT BITCH!
Treno: (Laughing)
CM: THAT'S IT I'M WRITING A ANZU/YAMI FIC!
Treno: EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!
Yami: (in the distance) NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
Anzu: (in the distance) YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yami: (in the distance) AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! (runs like hell)
Treno: She'll just counter it with a Joey/Mai fic you know.
CM: THEN I'LL MAKE HER WATCH STEPPIN OUT!
Treno: Then she'll make you watch Mysteries of the Ancient Priesthood Language
CM: DAMN IT!
Treno: (shrugs) Just name the folder with Blade's fics "Blade's crap."
CM: YAY!!!!! IDEA!
Treno: Here's another one...GET ON WITH THE FIC!
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Diana: (still crying)
Zidane: (sweatdrops) I did it! (takes a deep breath) wait that is a good thing...RIGHT!?
CM: (puts Joey's collar on) NOW SIT!
Joey: (sits on all fours)
Seto: CAN WE HURRY UP AND GET THIS DAMN WEDDING OVER!? YUGI'S GOT OUR MARY- SUE!
Yami, Mokuba, DM and Malik: WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOUR MARY-SUE!?
DMG and Marik: What'd we miss?
Mai: For your sanitys sake I won't go into it.
DMG: Ok.
Marik: Sa-na-ty? What's that?
DMG: He's so kawaii isn't he? (glomps Marik)
Zidane: Ok let's...DM GET UP HERE!
DM: (gets up and stands beside Diana, still blubbering over Mary-Sue)
Zidane: Right, Diana you want him?
Diana: (sniff) Yes.
Zidane: And you want her, right DM?
DM: I WANT MARY-SUE!
Yami, Malik Seto and Mokuba: MARY-SUE IS MINE!
Zidane: STUPID EH! (whacks DM across the skull with a sledge hammer) SHADUP ABOUT MARY-SUE! Now SAY YOU'LL MARRY DIANA OR I'LL CRACK YOUR SKULL WIDE OPEN!
DM: (Crying) I'LL MARRY DIANA!
Zidane: Good.right you're both man and wife.you both have my deepest sympathy.
Matthew: (sneaking off with the wedding cake)
Mokuba: HE'S TAKING THE CAKE!!! GET HIM!
Matthew: AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! (runs off with the trolley which the cake is on)
Yami: Is it over?
Zidane: Uh huh.
Yami: MARY-SUE I'M COMING! (runs off)
Seto, Malik and Mokuba: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT! (run after him)
(in the lab)
Adiana: Ok.that should be you two done.this evil scientist thing is eaiser than I thought!
Legolas and Aragon: Must kill Mary-Sue......
Legolas: We are sugar powered zombies.
Aragon: Must stab captain obvious 1!
Legolas: Yet another 1.
KT: I was starting to think we weren't going to be in it anymore this chap!
CM: (in the distance) Sorry.
KH: Ok how'd we hear that?
Yugi and Mary-Sue: (skip past)
KH: (pans Bakura)
KT: (pans Ryou)
(A/N this is to knock them out so the aren't affected by Mary-Sue I know you don't wanna pan them but hey...love hurts.)
Treno: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MARY SUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! RUN FOR COVER!!!!!!!!!!! (runs off with the kids)
KT and KH: WAIT FOR US!!!!!! (drag Ryou and Bakura off with them)
(five minutes after Diana and DM go off on there honeymoon all the girls and Zidane, Leoglas and Aragon are in a tent, CM and Zidane are wearing general uniforms)
CM: Ok Zidane, since you insist you're Blade, what's the plan?
Zidane: The plan...is to....err...KILL MARY-SUE!
The girls: AYE!
Zidane: So we go out search as a team and KILL!!!!!! HER!!!!!!!!!
(all the girls leave the tent)
Mary-Sue: Now boys, no need to fight over me! But if you REALLY want to, go ahead.
Yami: Ok...AIBOU YOU SELF ABSORBED LITTLE TWERP!
(Seto, Yami, Malik and Mokuba start hacking Yugi to pieces with rusty chainsaws.)
The girls form a ring around the perimeter and move in.
KT: Trust Blade the one time you need her she's not here.
Zidane: I AM HERE!
KH: THEN WHY DON'T YOU TURN INTO A DRAGON, FLY OVER THERE AND GET YOUR YAM YAM BACK!?
Zidane: Err.
CM: Yeah Blade!
Zidane: SHUT IT!!!!!!!!!
Blade: (appears in a puff of smoke) Sounds like someone's acting like themselves for an extended period of time! YOU HAVE TO BE MY SLAVE!
Zidane: I'll only be your slave if you can defeat the un-escapable force of.....(turns chibi) CHIBI BLADE!!! (the others close in)
Blade: (gasp) BUT THAT'S MY CHIBI! WE ONLY AGREED TO SWITCH UNCHIBI VERSIONS OF OURSELVES!
Zidane: OUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'M BLADE!
Blade: TWO CAN PLAY AT THIS GAME! (turns chibi) OUUUUUUUU LOOK!!!!!!!!! I'M MONKEY BOY!!!!!! OH THERE'S A GIRL I'M GONNA FLIRT WITH HER! (pulls Zidane's hair) MISS MOST POWERFULLEST HALF DRAGON LADY IN THE ENTIRE WORLD WHOSE NAME IS BLADE, I'M ZIDANE I GOTTA FLIRT WITH YOU CUZ I'M ZIDANE! I LIKE TO KEEP TELLING PEOPLE THAT MY NAME IS ZIDANE!!!
Zidane: (pulling Blade's hair) SHUT UP BEST BANDIT IN THE WORLD GUY!
Blade: (changes to a back to normal and then to a dragon) ZIDANE YOU DOLT, THIS ENDS NOW!
Zidane: (changes back to normal then goes into trance) FINE BY ME YOU OVER GROWN FLUFFY LIZARD!
MEANWHILE!
(The girls have already cut Mary-Sue up into little bite sized pieces and sent those to the shadow realm)
All guys except Marik, Ryou and Bakura who weren't effected: MARY- SUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!1111111111111111
Legolas and the Legolas plushie army: LOOK AT ALL THE 1'S!!!!!!
Aragon: THAT'S IT!!!!!!!! LEGOLAS YOU'RE THE BIGGEST PONCE I'VE EVER MET!
Legolas: Oh bite me.
Aragon: Blow me!
CM: PARTY!!!!!! ZIDANE!!!!!!!
(Blade by this point has dislocated her jaw (you know the way Boa Constricters do to eat prey bigger than there own head?) and tried to swallow Zidane)
Zidane: (trying to keep Blade's mouth open) I'M A LITTLE BUSY AT THE MOMENT!
CM: BLADE SPIT ZIDANE OUT NOW!
Blade: Why?
CM: IF YOU DON'T I'LL TELL THE AUTHOURESS WHAT YOU DID LAST WEEK!
Blade: (spits Zidane out) NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
CM: Well then.it's (looks at watch) 10:30 pm.shall we begin?
Zidane: Agggggggghhhhhh I'm covered in dragon drool!
Blade: Sorry about that.
CM: (snaps her fingers and Ziddys all clean.)
Zidane: OK ALL OF THE KIDS GO BACK TO THERE ROOMS!!!!!
(Everyone under fifteen (except Brittany for the time being)leaves)
Blade: Ok.now what?
Zidane: Well your too big for a start.
Blade: ...(changes back)
Zidane: OOOOOOkkkkkkkkkkkk.(snaps his fingers and enough booze to make Barney Gumble throw up, appear on all the tables that just conveniently happen to be out) before we start the games how's about a quick game of chuck Anzu?
All: YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11
Legolas: MORE 1'S!!!!!!!!!!!
All: SHUT UP!!!
Zidane: Ok according to Yugifan all we need to do is chuck her in this river and she'll turn into a guy.
Yugi: I WANNA DO IT!
Yami: NO I WANNA DO IT!!!!!!!!!!
Yugi: SHUT UP!!!!! YOU GET TO DO EVERYTHING!!!!
Yami: STUPID LITTLE (goes to chock Yugi, who runs away) GET BACK HERE!
CM: I think Blade should do it.
Blade: Really?
Everyone else: WHY HER!?
CM: Cuz Anzu and Mary-Sue tortured Blade on the road trip!
KT and KH: Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh yeah.....(nervous laugh, back away slowly)
Blade: Ok....(puts on protective gloves and throws Anzu into the river)
Anzu: WHAAAA!!!!!!!!!!! I got all wet!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (but it doesn't turn her into a boy...probably cuz she all ready is one...NO OFENSSE TO ANY GUYS READING THIS!)
Blade: And with that out of the way.
Authoress: FIRST OFF, TRUTH OR DARE!
All: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Yami: But the reason we're here is because we WANTED TO GET AWAY FROM THAT!
Blade: TOUGH SHIT!
Freya: But I thought you said that, if CM did another chapter of TaDoP you'd knock her into the next century?
Blade: I know, I just felt like yelling at the fern head.
Yami: (sniffles)
Blade: (flicks her hair away from her face) Neyh.
CM: Ok, well lets all get in a circle shall we?
(everyone sits in a circle)
CM: Ok.......let's-
Michael: (appears in a puff of smoke) *cough* Here's the dares. (gives CM the dares and disappears in a puff of smoke again)
KT: Who was that?
Blade and CM: My big brother.
CM: WHAT!?
Blade: Well...we are sort of family right!?
CM: I guess.
Zidane: Ok, ok, that's nice, what's the first dare!?
Chester: (runs up) Wait! Here's the truths! (gives them to Blade and runs off)
CM: Who...was that?
Blade: Just an old friend.
KH: Can we PLEASE start already!?
CM: Ok, Yami has to slap Yugi across the face as hard as he possibly can.
Yami and Yugi: WHAT!?
CM: You heard me.
Yugi: B-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-but...
Yami: THIS ISN'T FAIR!
The other yami and hikaris: (snickering)
CM: We can wait all night Yami and if you still won't I'll- ummm
Yami: You'll do what!?
CM: I'll-
Blade: She'll say who your one and only was back in Egypt.
Yami: (SCREECH!)
Bakura: Who was it?
Blade: (whispers in his ear)
Bakura: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!! (rolls around on the grass)
Blade: (snicker)
Adiana: Right whatever, Yami hurry it up will you!?
Yami: ..........................
Blade: Fine then, IT WAS BI-(Yami covers her mouth)
Yami: OK, OK I'LL DO IT ALL RIGHT!? JUST DON'T TELL THEM!
Yugi: (crying)
Yami: Sorry aibou...(whacks Yugi as hard as he can around the face, which isn't very hard.)
Yugi: That...wasn't too bad.
Marik and Bakura: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA THE PHARAOH CAN'T EVEN HURT HIS HIKARI!
Kairi-chan: Ok, next up?
Crystal: Let's do a truth this time!
Blade: Well then, ok first truth is for Zidane.
Zidane: Mummy.
Blade: Have you EVER chatted up any girls or even had some sort of mini affair since you and Garnet started going serious?
Zidane: Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...............sort of...
Freya: ZIDANE! HOW COULD YOU!?
Zidane: What do you care!? Besides, I bet Frately doesn't know about all the guys you've been with since he left!
Freya: YOU DAMN MONKEY!
Zidane: YA BIG RAT! (both start fighting)
CM: Ok, next dare, for...KT!
KT: BITCH!
CM: (starts crying)
Joey: (takes the dare cards off CM) Let's see here.....you have to stay away from Ryou the rest of the party.
KT: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVIL!!!!!!!!!!!! DOUBLE BITCH!
CM: WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
KT: (storms off to the other side of the circle, away from Ryou.)
Blade: Look on the bright side Chi Mo, if Jasmine were here and it was her dare to stay away from Yugi, she would've said something a LOT worse.
DMG: She can get REAL scary when you try to keep her from Yugi.
Marik: Better keep the fact that Saturn got bored with Yami a secret then!
Blade: Uh huh.
CM: (stops crying) Ok then.
Blade: Right, next truth, for Chi Mo.
CM: Oh no.
Blade: Is it true that you bought those green contact lenses and want to grow your hair as long as mine so you'll look more like Aeris because you fancy Cloud more than you do Jonouchi?
Joey: WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!???
CM: NO WAY! Besides you know why I got them! I HATE HAVING BLUE EYES AND YOU THOUGHT I WAS TEA!
Blade: Well you have to admit, you did resemble her.
CM: I DIDN'T! MY HAIR ISN'T THAT SHORT! IT'S HALF AS LONG AS YOURS! Plus it's not as dark.
Blade: I was kidding! Relax.
CM: Ok then, next dare, for Marik and DMG!
Marik: YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DMG: I like the sound of it so far.
CM: You and DMG have to have a moment, all soppy type.
Marik and DMG:...fair enough.
CM: (a spot light appears a little to the left of the group) Ok go on under the spot light.
They both go under the spotlight and Marik takes DMG's hands.
CM: You have to stutter as well Marik!
Marik: WHAT!?
CM: It has to be REALLY soppy!
DMG: (GROAN.)
Marik: Fine, I can do soppy. I think. Ok right. Here we go...
DMG: If you did it some time before you grew a beard it'd be nice.
Marik: (clears his throat) D-DMG?
DMG: (flutters her eyelashes) Yes?
{A/N CM: Oh dear God, DMG's gonna kill me. Blade: (holding in a bout of laughter) Well what did you expect!?.}
Marik: W-we've k-known each o-other for a long t-time now and...
DMG: What is it sugar?
DMY: (in her soul room laughing her ass off)
Marik: A-and I-I-I-I-I just wanted to say that
DMG: Yes?
Marik: I l-love you!
DMG: I LOVE YOU TOO!
(both glomp each other)
Malik: Whoa, I didn't think they had it in them to do something soppy!
DMG: (glares at CM) Wait to I get my hands on you after this, I'll rip you apart.
CM: AH! (hides behind Blade)
Blade: Ok next truth, for Mai.
Mai: Help me.
Blade: Have you EVER worn jeans?
Mai: Yes.
All: Really!?
Mai: Well of course! The director just likes me in a skirt, that's all.
CM: Ok then, next dare, for......Brittany and Kaira-Chan, you have to resolve, in a civil way mind you, which one of you is more deserving of Yami's love.
Kaira-Chan and Brittany: (glare at each other before going in for the kill.)
Brittany: HE'S MINE!!!!!!!! GAHHHHHH!!!!
Kaira-Chan: YOU'RE A TEN YEAR OLD, WHAT CHANCE DO YOU THINK YOU HAVE WITH A PHARAOH!? HE'S MINE!
Both: DIE BITCH!
CM: Oh well.
Blade: Next up, a truth for Yugi!
Yugi:...........
Blade: Have you ever cheated on a girl-friend before?
Yugi: Emmmmm..............
Adiana: Who wrote these anyway!?
CM: Aquintencies of mine.
Blade: You mean your cousin and the two freaks?
CM: Yup.
Blade: Anyway Yugi, have you?
Yami: He ha-
Yugi: SHUT UP!
Blade: You HAVE to answer Yugi.
Yugi: OK! OK! OK! I went out with Saturn when she got bored with Yami, ok!?
Blade: Awwwwwww the two shrimps.
Yugi: You aren't exactly tall yourself.
Blade: What you see now, but in reality I'm a 18ft high, 43ft long dragon with a 86ft wingspan! Not too shabby when it comes to size if I may say so myself.
Yami: I liked you better when you couldn't talk.
Blade: Hmph.
CM:???
Seto: I agree, she was much sweeter.
Blade: SHADDUP YOU STUPID EH'S! (whacks them with a paper fan)
CM: Ok, well whatever...let's see, next dare. Oh no, another one that's going to get me beaten up...
All: ?
CM: Adiana has to get drunk and belly dance for Hojo.
Adiana: WHAT!?
CM: Could be worse.
Adiana: HOW EXACTLY!?
CM: I do not...know.
All: (anime fall)
CM: Ok then I won't make you do it...Freya can take your place, but you'll have to take her dare ok?
Adiana: Whatever.
Squall: BASTARD!
Adiana: THAT'S IT! (Chases Squall with a butchers knife) GET BACK HERE YOU (Censoring this part out)
CM: Freya!
Freya: (stabbing Zidane with the Dragons Hair) WHAT!?
CM: You have to get drunk and belly dance for Hojo. Tom Ato, bring out the strongest you've got!
Tom: Yes miss. (brings out a mircosopic bottle)
CM: Come on Freya, it's not like we're asking you to drink a giant bottle!
Freya: Well ok....
CM: Here you go.
Freya: (takes the bottle, drinks it and nearly passes out.) Whoa...that stuff sure is...
CM: Strong?
Freya: Give me some more...
CM: Sorry can't, the stuff is TOO strong.
Freya: I SAID GIVE IT TO ME!!!!!!!!
CM: Geez, alright, but if you cause any trouble, we'll have to tie you up. Tom Ato!
Tom: Yes miss. (hands Freya a slightly bigger bottle.)
Freya: This is what I've been missing out on all my life!? This is the best thing I ever *hic* drank!
CM: Slow down, ok now you must dance with Hojo.
(Hojo appears)
Freya: Who?
CM: HOJO!
Freya: (grabs CM by the collar.) WHAT DID YOU CALL ME!?
CM: Tom Ato!
Freya: Ketchup?
Tom: Why do people always make fun of me!? (runs off)
CM: Freya, let me go!
Freya: GIMMIE SOME MORE!
CM: Only if you complete the dare!
Freya: Dare?
CM: DANCE FOR HOJO YOU IDIOT!
Hojo: Come on, dance!
Freya: Is'at Hojo? Isn't arms growing out of your back and feelers growing out of your head a little odd?
Hojo: How dare YOU!?
Freya: SHADDUP! (falls asleep)
Blade: Ok, well first off, (sends Hojo through a time gate.) and now the next truth, for Seto.
Seto: Oh great.
Blade: Did you ever back in Egypt get...oh gross...busy with the pharaohs wife?
Seto: (turns several shades of green before running off into the woods to be sick.)
KH: I take it that's a no, huh?
CM: Next dare! For KH!
KH: Eep.
CM: You gotta squeal your mans nickname before huggleing him almost to death.
KH: Ok......I guess. SNOWBALL!!!!!!!!!!!!! (huggles Bakura almost to death.)
Bakura: MY SPLEEN!
Blade: Right, ok then next up Ryou. Out of the entire cast of YGO (apart from the obvious Anzu) who can you not stand, who gets on your nerves SO much you just wanna hack them up into little tiny pieces and feed them to little baby sharks?
Ryou: Ummmmm....(mumbles something)
All: What?
Ryou: (mumbles it again)
Bakura: For crying out loud, just say it already!
Ryou: Fine then! YUGI!
Yugi: (Is shocked) What!?
All: (gasp)
Ryou: You are such a little twerp! And people actully think your sweeter than me!? EVERYONE'S ALWAYS SAYING HOW YUGI'S THE PERFECT FRIEND! WELL WHAT ABOUT ME!? I'M 100 TIMES BETTER THAN YOU IN EVERY WAY!
KT: GO HUNNY BUNNY! GO!
Ryou: (gasping for breath)
Yugi: (starts crying)
CM: Whoa that was nasty! And it came from Ryou!
Mai: Imagine.
Crystal: Imagine what?
Mai: I didn't mean it like that.
CM: Ok, next up. Crystal.
Crystal: WHOO HOO!
CM: You have to join in the fight with Britanny and Kaira-Chan.
Crystal: OK! (joins in the fight.)
Blade: Mokuba, you next.
Mokuba: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Blade: Have you ever worn a dress?
Mokuba:...............I'd be lying if I said I hadn't.
Blade: This is excluding the time when you switched places with princess Adina.
Mokuba: WHAT!!?? WAIT-
CM: Next! It was meant for Freya, but now it's Adiana's dare, ok Adiana you have to kill Queen Bhrane.
Adiana: Ok.
Bhrane: (appears) WHAT AM I DOING OUT HERE!? EWWWWWWWW! NATURE!
Adiana: (picks up Freya's Dragon Hair (it's a spear btw) and impales Bhrane on it.) There, happy?
CM: Very much so, thanks.
Blade: Right, next a truth for Joey, have you ever actually during the making of the series or at any other time been attracted to Mai?
Joey: NO WAY!
Mai: Like he would ever have a chance anyway.
CM: Good puppy. A dare up for Malik! Let's see how many ginger bread men you can eat!
(after an hour)
Malik: Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhgggggggggggggggggg no more I can't handle any-more...
CM: Well done, you got 97.
Malik: EEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwwww.
Blade: Ok next, ummmmm...we need Jasmine for this.
CM: But her yami's in the middle of...err, we can't disturb them.
Blade: Very well then. (crumbles up the last truth)
CM: One more left, (doesn't have the gumption to look at it first) who HASN'T gone yet?
Blade:...........................
CM: I wonder (goes to check, but Blade lunges forward and tries to grab it off her) BLADE WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?
Blade: Give me the paper Hikari.
CM: Oh I see....hahahahahahaha! Zidane hold her back while I read this!
Zidane: (holds Blade back)
Blade: NOOOOOOOOOO!!!
CM: Ouuuuuuuuu. We have to see what you did in Egypt.
Blade: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
(the screen starts to go white and blurry and shows a room in Yami's palace, Blade's already been here 7 years.)
Pharaoh: Your dreams are in bad taste.
Nanaki: (Blade's Egyptian name) *telapaty* Please forgive me Pharaoh if I have angered you by showing my dream with out your permission. But you must understand one thing, if you kill the tomb robber, bad as he may be, it will only cause you more grief in the long run.
Pharaoh: What are you jabbering on about now Kanaki? Your visions of the future are becoming more and more inaccurate all the time.
Nanaki: Please, listen! You should be more concerned about those who pretend to be loyal to you! Heishin and Seto are two you need to be especially careful of.
Pharaoh: Stop talking such nonsense! If not for me you would be long dead, after all (bends down and takes a few strands of her EXTREMLY long hair *it was about 4 times longer back then, and even now it's down to her waist, WASN'T IT LONG OR WHAT!?*) how can a deaf, blind, mute possibly defend themselves? Even if they USED to have the power to foretell the future.
(flash back ends)
Mai: Whoa, Blade used to say please.
CM: Yami I had no idea what a bastard you really are! HOW DARE YOU TREAT MY YAMI LIKE THAT!? (tries to beat him up and fails miserably.)
KH: I don't ever remember seeing you, or hearing that the pharaoh had a fortune-teller.
Blade: As far as I knew he kept me in a very small room and only he and my sister were allowed to see me. Strange as it may sound I actually valued the little human company I got back then.
Zidane: (crying) That's so sad! (sniffles) Wait, didn't Yami call you a death, blind, mute? So how the hell do you have all your senses now?
Blade: I won't go into any major detail, but I was 'born' a death, blind mute. When the pharaoh blamed me on his wife's death and had me killed, it triggered my ascendsion and becoming a dragon gave me all seven senses.
All: Seven!?
Blade: Dragons have seven.
CM: Cool. (goes back trying to beat Yami up)
Yami: Will you quit it squirt? (flicks CM in-between the eyes.)
CM: OUCH!!!!!!! HEY! I'M TALLER THAN YOU! Puppy are you going to stand there after what he just did!?
Joey: Oh! Right, YOU'RE GOING DOWN YAMI! (tackles Yami)
CM: (sighs) My hero.
Bakura: ENOUGH TALK!!!!! LET THE BOOZING BEGIN!
KT: WAIT! If we start boozing now, we won't be able to play laser tag!
CM: Blade and me will sit this one out, those things give us a headache.
Blade: Em hmm.
KT: Ok! (gives everyone but Yugi, Kaira-Chan, Brittany, Crystal and Freya a laser) first one to hit Yugi wins! Ok Yugi, we'll give you a 30 head start!
Yugi: (screeches like a little girl and runs off into the woods)
KT: OK AFTER HIM!
Zidane: So much for a 30-second head start. (runs off with the others)
Freya: ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ *hic* ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZz
Kaira-Chan, Brittany and Crystal: (rolling around on the floor killing each other.)
(five minutes later)
CM: Hmm...Yugi must be faster than I thought.
Blade: (as a dragon.) It seems so.
Yugi: (runs out of the woods, and his face is all swollen up)
CM: GROSS!
Yugi: DMG GOT ME! (runs around in a blind panic.)
DMG: (runs out of the woods too) Miss me Yugi!? (shoots him in the face again)
Yugi: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
Blade: I think Yugi's had enough today.
DMG: Awwwwwww come on!
Blade: (growls) I SAID THAT'S ENOUGH!
DMG: On second thought. You're right I guess. (puts the laser down.)
Freya: Ouu.....*hic* someone is in a bad mood!
(everyone comes out of the bushes)
Bakura: Can we get drunk now!?
CM: Sure.
(five minutes later.)
CM: (after one beer) Well that my quota over!
Blade: (hasn't had anything) Yeah whatever.
Squall: BASTARD!!!
All: FUCK OFF SQUALL!
Squall: (runs off crying)
Zidane: Ok let's start the first game!!! Hour of Power!
Bakura: HA!!!!!!!!! I'VE NEVER BEEN BEATEN AT THIS GAME BEFORE!!!!!!!
CM: Ok...(takes out the rules) The hour of power does not necessarily need to begin at the top or bottom of an hour. To partake in this journey all of the players involved need a shot glass, a ready supply of beer and a watch or clock with a second hand. To begin this game everyone opens a beer and pours a shot. An official time keeper, that'll be me, gives the mark and everyone drinks their shot of beer. Afterwards everyone fills their shot glass and prepares for the next minute. As soon as sixty seconds have passed then everyone does their second shot of beer. Everyone involved in this spectacle continues drinking one shot of beer, every minute for the next hour. This may not seen like a lot, however, this comes out to drinking 7 1/2 beers in an hour. This is quite a feat for even the most hardy of drinkers. This game is not for the faint of heart of stomach. All participants are prohibited from going to the bathroom for the entire duration. If they attempt to then they are disqualified and must be severly punished. There is no need to break any bones, but there're sure (whoever made the game up) that we can handle it!
Bakura: I KNOW ALL THAT ALL READY!
Kaira chan: Yes but we didn't.
Zidane: RIGHT! *hic* CM's the time keeper! Everyone else, get a shot!
CM: OKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BEGIN!!!!!!!!!!!!
(half an hour later, only KH, Bakura, Marik, DMG and Yugi are still going)
Everyone else: Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
CM: Ok another one!
(after 57 minutes)
DMG: Ohhhhhhhhh..(falls on top of Marik) Hello....
Marik: Nice landing...heh, heh...
(only Yugi and Bakura left)
Bakura: Ugh...
Yugi: Bud...
(At 59: 55)
Bakura: (about to collapse, sends Yugi to the shadow realm) I WON!!!!! (collapses)
Zidane: (pulls himself off the ground) Time for *hic* the next game!
All: (groan and Yugi comes back from the shadow realm)
CM: Ok next game isssssssssssss......Smile! Here's how to play: There is nothing in this world quite like a smile. Warm and inviting, it can be as much a window to the soul as the deepest blue eyes or the most heartfelt of words. When you smile you are saying I love you. You are projecting the elegance of the human spirit. On the other hand, you may simply be, shall we say, aroused.
Blade: I'll never smile again...
Zidane: (rolls his eyes) Like you've ever smiled before *HIC* anyway!
CM: AHEM! As I was saying, that having been said, we present for your enjoyment "Smile", a game which, if nothing else, aims to please. Blah blah blah...OH! Here we go! Six to ten men and woman, more or less evenly divided by gender, should seat themselves around a table large enough to comfortably seat all participants. Drape a heavy tablecloth over the table with ample enough fabric to reach the fabric on all sides. Be sure everyone is well lubricated and in easy reach of the beverage of their choice. You are essentially ready to begin at this point. Each player should...DROP THERE PANTS AND SUCH TO THEIR ANKLES!?
All: O.O!?
CM: Making them not only a bit exposed but unable to flee without much fanfare and great difficulty. At this point, players should pass a dice from left to right in the hopes of, or in fear of in some cases rolling a six. Once a six is rolled, the player responsible must drop to the floor beneath the table, shielded from view, and "do as they wish". The object of their "doings" is to make of the players above crack a smile. Everything goes. Once a player smiles, and we mean a real honest to Mary, Joseph and the baby Jesus smile, the player below may return to their chair. The "smiler" must consume the contents of one entire beverage (one full beer, a full glass of wine etc.), and the rolling continues right of the player just returned from fondling duties. Ummmmm well this games somewhat...different?
Blade: There's over ten of us so I call that, I AM NOT PLAYING!
Freya: I'll *hic* excuse me, sit this one out too.
Zidane: ME TOO!
CM: Ok I'll decide who's playing! Yami, Yugi, Ryou, Bakura, Katy, Kathy, Kaira-Chan, Adiana, DMG and Marik.
Seto, Mai, Malik, Mokuba and Joey: PHEW!
CM: (puts the cloth over one of the tables) Ok you guys, ready?
Everyone who is gonna play: YES!
CM: Ok well we'll go for a walk...while you guys get on with it.
Marik: I wanna roll first! (rolls a six) YAY!!!!!! (dives under the table)
DMG: That was fast...(starts smiling, then giggling and then goes into hysterics)
Marik: (pops back up laughing)
DMG: (starts drinking one pink of beer)
Bakura: Ok my turn! (rolls and gets a six) Well what do ya *hic* know! (dives under the table)
Kathy: ^_^;; HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE!!! (starts drinking a beer)
Bakura: ^_^ (pops up and gives the dice to Ryou)
Ryou: Okkkkkkk...(rolls a six)...?
Yami: _;; There's no way!
Katy: 3 6's in a row is just a bit TOO much!
Adiana: It wouldn't happen to be Zidane's die would it!?
Karia-Chan: Yeah...so?
Adiana: (rolls it and gets a 6) This thing is fixed!
Katy: Trust Zidane...
(meanwhile)
Zidane: (sniggering to himself)
Blade: (hits him with a paper fan) WILL YOU QUIT THAT!?
Mai: Yeah, you git!
Seto: (snigger)
Mokuba: STOP IT SETO, YOU'RE SCARING ME!
Seto: You damn cry baby!
Mokuba: WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Blade: (looks around) Wait a damn minute...where'd my hikari go!?
Freya: Joseph is also missing.
Zidane: Well it doesn't take a genius to figure out we're they've gone.
Blade: ¬_¬;; (walks off)
Mai: Yuck...(follows Blade, Freya and Zidane.)
Mokuba: WHAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Seto: SHUT UP YOU STUPID BRAT!
Mokuba: WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!
Seto: AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! SHUT UP AND I'LL BUY YOU A PONY WHEN WE GET HOME!
Mokuba: (stops crying) Yay! Hey....where'd everyone go!?
Seto: HUH!? AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! We're lost!
Mokuba: WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!
(off somewhere else)
CM: Where'd they go!? PUPPY!!!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU!? I cant fight my way out of a paper bag and these woods are full of bloody great big...(notices a tower in the distance) hey...that didn't used to be there!
(Zidane and the others are already in the tower)
Blade: ZIDANE YOU RAT BASTARD!!! GIVE THAT BACK! (chases Zidane down one of the corriders)
Zidane: HAHA!
Freya: Both of you stop!
Malik: I don't think they heard you...
Mai: I don't think they care...
Freya: Ahhhhhhhhhhhh...then to hell with them! I'm going back because there's bound to be some sort of trap or boss monster or some damn thing in here!
Mai: Good point, I'll go with you!
Freya: (walks out with Mai and Malik following)
Zidane runs into a small room at the end of the corridor and stops dead in his tracks, Blade catches up, grabs her sword back and gets a real eire feeling. The door behind them shuts by itself and scary music starts to play.
Zidane: V___V;; I DON'T LIKE THIS!
Blade: That music's creeping me out...it's like something out of Silent Hill! Zidane?
Zidane: Yeah?
Blade: (terrified) Hold me.
Zidane: (terrified too.) Only if you hold me.
Both: (hold on to each-other, and Kuja's teleportation thing brings them back to where the others are.)
Kuja: RIGHT! Now that we're all here! WHO'S IDEA WAS THIS!?
All: (point to Zidane)
Kuja: WHY AM I NOT SURPRISED!?
Zidane: Neyh.
????: ZIDANE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Treno: Vivi?
Vivi: (comes out of the bushes totally exhausted) IT'S EIKO!
Zidane: (rolls his eyes) Now what's she gotten into!?
Vivi: No it was her!
CM: It was her what?
Vivi: SHE SUMMONED THE EVIL ANIME CHARACTER EATING THINGIE!
All: WHAT!?
TEACET: (comes into the clearing with Eiko on it's back)
Eiko: ZIDANE MY LOVE, IT'S BEEN SO LONG!
Zidane: For me it wasn't long enough...
Eiko: WHAT!? YOU STUPID PIG!
Zidane: Hey, WAIT A MINUTE! IT'S YOUR FAULT GARNET'S DEAD!
Eiko: Well duh! I needed her out of the picture! I didn't mean for it to kill all those other people...but hey.
All: YOU BITCH EIKO!
Eiko: Now your gonna get it! FLUFFY ATTACK WITH YOUR SPORES!
Zidane: YOU NAMED THAT THING FLUFFY!?
Eiko: Shut up you insensitive prick!
Fluffy: (uses its spore attack and everyone falls asleep.)
Kuja: Can I have the pink one Garland? (snore)
Eiko: HA! (stuffs them all in a large crate.)
TEACET: (knocks Eiko out, stuffs her in the crate, seals it and mails it to the Forgotten Continent.)
THE END
Aki: WHAT! This' ending already?
CM: (looks at the, THE END sign) Well that's what those words usually mean!
Aki: But things were just starting to get interesting!
CM: Well, come on folks, let's do this "ending" thing.
Aki: Roll the credits! While that's going on...let's...
Hanna's voice: Do a slide show!
Aki: Okkkkkkkkkkkkkk.how'd we hear that!!!???
CM: Okay! Let the ultimate slide show begin!
Aki: First, let's see a close up of Leene square!
(a guy completely covered in armour walks out in front of the two)
CM: There's the Steel Runner.
Aki: I've never understood why anyone would want to run for 3 hours at a stretch.
CM: Forget that! Can you imagine what the inside of that amour must smell like?
Aki: What a lovely thought, CM. Let's get on with the show OKAY!?
CM: Next let's visit Guardia castle.
(The steel runner runs off and another less amour clad soldier appears)
Aki: Goodness! VERY nice scenery!
CM: But of course, my dear!
Aki: I guess you never took a shot at him, right? HEY didn't he just wink at me there!?
CM: RELAX Aki!!!
(The soldier leaves and a lawyer type person appears)
Aki: Hey it's Pierre!
CM: Wouldn't want anything to do with someone like HIM. Too shifty.he should be put on trail!
Aki: Come on, CM! Live a little! Let your hair down! Get crazy!!!
CM: Yeah thanks, AKI. I'll take that under advisement!!!
(Pierre disappears and a guy with a motor bike attatched to him appears)
CM: Theeeeeeeeeeeeere's Johnny (NOT Johnny Steps).Mr Speed himself!
Aki: Someone ought to tell him to take a permanent pit stop. Look at that hair!
CM: Hey check it out! He's really a tricycle! Pass him!
Aki: Try again when you learn to RIDE.
CM: .........
(Johnny disappears and is replaced by ANOTHER knight)
CM: Hey there's that stuffed-shirt, Cyrus!
Aki: He IS pretty handsome, though.
CM: But where does he buy his clothes?
Aki: Hey did you hear? He plucks his eyebrows!
CM: You've got to be joking!
(Cyrus disappears and is replaced by a traveler type person)
Aki: Hi Toma! Now he's definitely my type!
CM: He's just a flake.
Aki: .......Probably has a dozen girlfriends.
(Toma is replaced by a cave-man.)
Aki: What about him? That Kino guy?
CM: Total Neanderthal! Throw him a bone!
Aki: But he's honest. That's kind of attractive.
CM: He walks like a DUCK!!!
Aki: Well he'll never hurt anyone...
CM: He's really very gentle, isn't he?
(Kino disappears and Blade comes running up)
Blade: What ARE you two doing!? I thought you said something about a nice little slide show?
CM: Blade!
Aki: So we got a little carried away!
Blade: A little? No one has a bloody clue what you two are talking about!
Both: Sorry.
CM: Well now, where do we go?
Aki: Some place fun!
Blade: How about going HOME!?
Aki: Didn't I just say, "Some place fun!"!?
CM: Let's go toooooooooooooo JHOTO!
Aki: AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (runs off)
Blade and CM: (laugh)
CM: Seriously though were will we go?
Blade: (folds arms) Hmm...how about a sequel to Kamp Kuja?
CM: Well...Hey I know! How about, "I'M AN ANIME CHARACTER, GET ME OUTTA HERE!"?
Blade: Original hikari...original.
CM: Then...what about trying to do a serious fic?
Blade: Are you capable of doing something like that?
CM: I dunno...wait I already have done one!
Blade: But Hikari, IT'S FF VII!
Cloud: And WHAT is wrong with FF VII!?
CM: Nothing!
Blade: Besides none of us liked it! You kept torturing Vincent!!!
CM: The male you...
Vincent: PARDON!?
Blade: !?
CM: Oops...(Sends them both to Terra, ahhhhhhh the powers of an authoress) Ok...well what do you guys think? Should I try something serious for a change? Or a sequel to KK or...should I remove all my stories, change my name and move to Alaska? My fate is in your hands! Errrr....
Yugi: I don't think this is such a good idea! (is killed by a swarm of rabid fangirls)
Blade: See you in the sequel! You know this whole thing makes ...NO sense!
CM and Treno: OMGS!!!!!!!!! WE ARE BACK!!!!!!! (both cry with happiness)
Blade: (starts singing Suteki Da Ne)
Readers: (blink, blink) NO!!!!!! But, somebody said you were dead.
Blade: You should know that the grave could NEVER tame me! (goes into a bout of evil laughter.)
CM: No we've just been banned from the net until we found a job.and now that we've got one were BACK!!!!!!!! Well for the mo it's only me and Treno, Blade's busy at the minute.
Treno: ...
CM: We finished this a day after we were taken off the net soooooooooo it just goes on like we were never banned.okie? Well here it is.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Blade: YAY!!!!!!!!!!! THANK U!!!!!!!!!!! (jumps up and down) Ok, thank u to everyone who gave me the ideas! (gives Karia-Chan and Brittany a mountain of Yami plushies) Awwww hell, take the real one! (Gives them Yami to fight over Blade: I'm banned from him for a while anywho!) Okie!!!!!!!! KT & KH you two helped me so much! Thank you! Gives KH a mountain of Tomb Robber Plushies and KT loadddsssss of cool summer dresses and a Ryou plushie for the hey of it.
Disclaimer: We do not own Yu-Gi-Oh, nor do we own any Final Fantasy game. We don't own the beer games in this chapter either and we don't own the Crash and Cover Crash Duck...unfortunatly.
******************************************
(It's just after lunch and things are pretty normal...well as normal as they're gonna get around here anyway...)
Matthew: DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!! (runs after Anzu with the Millennium Dagger)
Bio Sang: GIVE ME THAT BACK!!!!!!! I NEED IT TO LIVE!
Matthew: How about no, ASSHOLE! (remember he says all Spanish like)
(out in the PE field)
Blade: YOU WILL GO FORTH AND KILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL ANZU AND ANY THAT STAND IN YOUR WAY!
Legolas Plushies: YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Blade: Now goooooooooooooo KILLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!! My pretties! KILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!
Legolas plushies: (march off)
Anzu: (has kidnapped Yugi, and is putting flowers in his hair) WE'RE FRIENDS, WE'RE FRIENDS, WE'RE FRIENDS!
Yugi: Just kill me and get it over with.
Legolas plushies: KILLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!! (kill Yugi because he's in front of Anzu, then they try to kill Anzu)
Anzu: More friends!!!!!!!!
Legolas plushies: RETREAT!!!!!!!!!!!
(somewhere else)
KH: (Panning Link to death in the background, so she can add Legolas to the anti Mary-Sue squad.yes she's been spotted)
CM: Okkkkkkkk....
KT: KEEP IT DOWN!!!! YOUR GONNA WAKE MELANIE AND KIRA UP!
Melanie, Kira, Nuru, Manu and Ebo wake up and start crying
Ottah: (takes a lighter and set's a picture of Joey alight)
CM: NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! Ottah!
Ottah: (eyes twitch)
CM: GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! WHAT'S WRONG WITH HIM!?
KH: Gee maybe it's all the shouting. (still panning Link.)
Blade: (comes in) OUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU KILL THE FRUIT! (hacks Link up while eyes twitch)
KT: Maybe.the twitching things genetic.
CM: Maybe.
(somewhere else outside)
Jasmine: (switches to Diana, hums the wedding march, nearly gets run over by a tanker)
Gimli: Yo I got an order here for 17 gallons of liqudatied sugar!
Diana: WELL IT'S NOT MINE! (bonks him over the head with her staff)
Gimli: No body loves me!!!!!!! (runs off)
Blade: (appears) OUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!! IT'S HERE!!!!! IT'S FINALLY HERE!!!!
Diana: What do you need 17 gallons of liqudated sugar for!?
Blade: For deprogramming my new recruits! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Karia-chan: (comes out of the bushes with one of her Yami plushies) HEY! WERE WAS I LAST CHAPTER!?
Blade: You were fighting over Yami with Brittany!
Karia-chan: Oh yeah.fair enough! I'm off to find Malik.
Blade: (glares at Diana)
Diana: Ummm.I'll go with you Karia-Chan!
Blade: My preciousssssssssssssssss.(gets in the tanker and drives off to the back of the main building) HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
(In some little experiment lab thingie, Legolas (the real one not the plushie) and Aragron have been strapped down to a cold metal table)
Legolas: We've been strapped down to a cold metal table.
Aragron: If I could reach my sword, I'd give you such a stabbing!
Legolas: (Sniffles) Don't you like me any more?
Aragron: You told people I lead children into my ginger bread house!1
Legolas: Attack of the 1's! And that was just a lie.
Aragron: Ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....1
Legolas: Another 1!
Aragron: Thanks captain obvious.
Legolas: No problem!
Blade: SHUT UP! (holds up two needles with little tubes attached to the bottom) I'm gonna pump you two so full of sugar, you won't know what mellinna it is never mind who's Mary Sue!
Legolas and Aragron: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MY LOVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Blade: SHADUP! In a matter of..well let's say an hour give or take.you two wouldn't know Mary-Sue if she sat on your head! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Legolas and Aragron: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Legolas: We're going to be put on a sugar rush!
Aragon: Oh for the love of 1!
Ryga and Baku: (are now ten and playing with the twins, yami's grow up fast huh?)
Kira: (pale skinned and has a white dummy)
Melanie: (darker skinned and has a pink dummy)
(KT's kids are as good as gold....CM isn't so lucky)
Nuru: (brown hair with green eyes, sucking on a chibi Yugi dummy)
Manu: (blonde hair and has brown eyes, so like his father! Is pulling lumps out of Mai's hair)
Ebo: (has blonde hair too and has blue eyes, and is drooling all over Treno)
Ottah: ( has blonde hair as well and grey eyes, and is burning the grass.)
CM: Gahhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!! Little evil buggers!
Nuru: (drops dummy out of her mouth and looks as if to say, "WTF HAVE I DONE YA OL BIDDY!?")
KT: YAY!!!!!!!! PARRRRRRRRRRRRTYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!
Treno: It's not fair!!!! Why do we have to go to bed early!?
CM: Because it gets somewhat weird later on.
KH: (finishes panning Link) Then you'll have to lock Brittany away too.
CM: I'll let Blade do that.
DMG: Where's Marik gone to!?
CM: Ohhhhhh he went for...(thinks, or tries to at least) ummm some equipment.
DMG: What kinda equipment!?
CM: Dunno, you'll have to ask Zidane.
DMG: Ahhhhhhhh.well.
CM: He's orangising the whole thing.so you can almost be garentied that by the end of the night we'll all be pissed.
Treno: Pissssssssssssssssed.
CM: TRENO!
Treno: What!? (toddles off )
Crystal, Kiara-chan and Jasmine: (beating Link up)
Link: My FAIRIES!!!
Blade: (in the lab) BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Legolas and Aragron: (getting sugared up)
Adiana: (comes in) Hey Blade...got Zidane's toy duck yet?
Blade: I completely forgot! Err.would you take over?
Adiana: Sure.(turns the power up to max) BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Zidane: (watching tv in Blade's room) Nothing like the ooooooooold couch.and the ooooooooold television...
TCACCD: (Quacks)
Zidane: And Blade, you can stop all that bad sneaking a ROUND I have the instints of a cat.
Blade: Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.(comes out from behind the door)
Zidane: You wouldn't go and get me a drink would you? Since you're so brilliant at things like that.
Blade: Ok...hey wait a minute! Your just doing the old, "Flatter stupid Blade so she does all the work while I sit on the ooooooooold couch watching the ooooooooold tv" thingie!
Zidane: HEY, BEING ME AIN'T EASY!
Blade:...........one moment pu-lease...(goes into the closet and comes out wearing a Zidane mask and sits on the couch) Oh yeah, I see what you mean! It's sooooooooooooooo much work being a greasy haired slob!
Zidane: Well at least I don't run around with a Spanish action figure of a wrestler no-one's ever heard of or seen before and smash up the furniture while shouting your own made up Spanish! (Goes in the closet and comes out wearing a Blade mask) OUUUUUUUUU LOOKIE I'M A REJECT OF A GOTH AND I LIKE TO PLAY WITH WRESTLING TOYS! (runs around the room with the toy wrestler while smashing into things)
Blade: I DO NOT GET ON LIKE THAT!!!
Zidane: (hits the toy against the closet) STUPID EH! STUPID EH! STUPID EH!
Blade: (grabs the toy off him) I DO NOT DO THAT YOU STUPID EH!
Zidane: Hey here's an idea.if you think being me is soooooooo easy then you become me and I'll have to be you....the first one to act like themselves for an extended period of time has to be the other one's slave for a whole week.
Blade: Okie dokie arta chewy.
Zidane: It's arta chokie.
Blade: I SAID IT'S ARTA CHEWY! AND WHATEVER I SAY IS RIGHT BECAUSE I'M ZIDANE! (jumps on the couch) oh yeah you gotta go do Diana and the Dark Magicians wedding now Bladieu.
Zidane: Bladieo
Blade: Bladieo.
Zidane: WAIT, WHAT DO YOU MEAN!?
Blade: Blade's the only one here that can marry peeps.so you gotta marry Diana and DM.
Zidane:........Ok.....(walks off) Oh I forgot how to breath, help me remember I'm so stupid!
(In one of the gardens, where the wedding is being held.)
Martin: NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
Matthew: (beating his shit in with Marik's baseball bat) FUCK UP YOU ASSHOLE!!!!!!!!!!
Marik: Can we play? PLEASE!?
Matthew: OK!
Marik and DMG: KILL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (both take out baseball bats and beat up Martina I mean Martin.)
Matthew, Marik and DMG: (take Martin off to finish the job)
Yami: (slaps his forehead.)
Mokuba: I guess having Matthew for security wasn't such a bad idea after all.
Zidane: (comes around the corner and stands in front of DM and Diana with a bible) Ok let's get this over with, Dark Magician do you ta-
CM: HOLD IT! WHAT'S GOING ON!? Zidane get down from there, Blade's supposed to be doing this!
Zidane: SHUT IT DUCKY! I AM BLADE!
Freya: (folds her arms) You haven't been sniffing Amarants cocane again by any chance?
Zidane: NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'VE NEVER DONE ANYTHING LIKE THAT YOU STUPID EH! I'M BLADE NOT ZIDANE!
CM: He's been sniffing it.
Treno: Umm where are KT, KH, Ryou and Bakura?
Mai: They all took sore heads.so there having a lay down.the twins are taking care of the babies with Yugi.
Treno: I'll go help too.(leaves)
CM: ZIDANE STOP BEING SUCH AN ATTENTION SEEKING IDIOT AND GET DOWN FROM THERE!
Zidane: I'M BLADE NOT ZIDANE!!! AND IF YOU DON'T SHUT UP THESE TWO WON'T GET MARRIED!
CM: Oh all right.
Zidane: Ok where was I?
????-???: HELLO!!! MISS ME!? (all glass breaks)
All the girls: MARY-SUE!?
All the guys present: (drool, this includes DM btw!)
Anzu: MARY-SUE!!! YAY!(she's somewhere in between a girl and a boy.don't you agree?)
Zidane: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! MUST NOT ACT LIKE SELF.MUST CONTINUE TO ACT LIKE BLADE.MUST NOT FLIRT! (punches himself in the face)
The guys: (are around Mary Sue like flies around shite.)
CM: (totally pissed) JONOUCHI KATSUYA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!! DO YOU WANT TO DIE!?
Joey somehow fights the evil of Mary Sue.
CM: NOW BEG LIKE THE DOG YOU ARE!
Joey: (kneels down with his hands poised like a dogs when it begs and begins yapping.)
Crystal: CM's scary when she's mad.
CM: I'm happy to say that I've learnt at least one thing off Blade that's paid off.
Diana: (crying)
Yami: Which is?
CM: FLASH BACK PLEASE!
(the screen goes all white and blurry)
Blade: Being a dragons great...you wouldn't believe what I save on travel expenses alone! And I can still enjoy the finer things in life...like revenge.
CM: Revenge?
Blade: Listen up, never EVER let men get out of your control, cuz if you do...they accuse you of high treason, and give you one slow and agonising death and then 5000 years later you wake up, realise your soul's been trapped inside a sword, you have one powder puff of a hikari and your stuck in one of the worst places in the world wishing you were in England! And all for what!? Cuz you pushed your good for nothing, rat bastard of a father (who happened to be one of the pharaoh's advisers) into a pit of flesh eating spiders!? And was accused for stabbing your sister in the back with a dagger that had a 17 cm blade!?
(end flashback)
Yami: (nervous laugh)
CM: So apart from learning that my yami was not only a sorceress but a serial killer, I learned that if you let men get out of your control the effects are somewhat...nasty.
Bio Sang: They blamed Blade for that?
Zidane: Yup.
Bio: (shrugs) Well what do you know?
Zidane: (sticks his tonuge out at Bio)
(scene switches to Blade)
Blade: (playing with the CACCD) WHAT!? Go back to the wedding!
(scene switches back to the wedding)
Yugi: (comes with a rocket launcher) PISS OFF, MARY-SUE'S MINE! (blows the other guys away.)
Seto, Yami, Malik, Mokuba and DM: Ouchies.
Mary-Sue: AWWWWWW! MY LITTLE YUGI'S SO STRONG! (skips off with Yugi.)
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ (The evil blue screen of death appears)
CM: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
Treno: WTF DID YOU DO!?
CM: NOTHING! Errrrrrrrr...press any key to continue...(presses a random key, nothing happens.) Umm...
Treno: Ah frig! (hits the reset button) there!
RUNNING SCAN DISC
Treno: Oh great we'll be here all year!
Alex: SCAN DISC!? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA WE HAVE XP!
CM: (acting Alex) Hahahahahahahahahaha none of your fucking stuff is compatible with XP!
Alex: So?
Treno: (face faults)
(Three weeks later scan disc is finished)
STARTING WINDOWS 98'
CM: FINALLY! Password... Fuzzy flying cupcakes.
Treno: What are you using Blade's password for!?
CM: If I use mine the computer might crash again!
Treno: BUT!
(the wallpaper comes up, which is a pic of the FF IX cast.)
CM: Figures.
Treno: Oh well...
CM: Ok.....(clicks on the fan fic folder and then on...) CM'S SHIT!?
Treno: (snigger)
CM: (clicks on it and all of the AMM, TaDoP, KK and a few other of CM's fics come up) OUUUUUUUUU THAT BITCH!
Treno: (Laughing)
CM: THAT'S IT I'M WRITING A ANZU/YAMI FIC!
Treno: EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!
Yami: (in the distance) NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
Anzu: (in the distance) YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yami: (in the distance) AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! (runs like hell)
Treno: She'll just counter it with a Joey/Mai fic you know.
CM: THEN I'LL MAKE HER WATCH STEPPIN OUT!
Treno: Then she'll make you watch Mysteries of the Ancient Priesthood Language
CM: DAMN IT!
Treno: (shrugs) Just name the folder with Blade's fics "Blade's crap."
CM: YAY!!!!! IDEA!
Treno: Here's another one...GET ON WITH THE FIC!
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Diana: (still crying)
Zidane: (sweatdrops) I did it! (takes a deep breath) wait that is a good thing...RIGHT!?
CM: (puts Joey's collar on) NOW SIT!
Joey: (sits on all fours)
Seto: CAN WE HURRY UP AND GET THIS DAMN WEDDING OVER!? YUGI'S GOT OUR MARY- SUE!
Yami, Mokuba, DM and Malik: WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOUR MARY-SUE!?
DMG and Marik: What'd we miss?
Mai: For your sanitys sake I won't go into it.
DMG: Ok.
Marik: Sa-na-ty? What's that?
DMG: He's so kawaii isn't he? (glomps Marik)
Zidane: Ok let's...DM GET UP HERE!
DM: (gets up and stands beside Diana, still blubbering over Mary-Sue)
Zidane: Right, Diana you want him?
Diana: (sniff) Yes.
Zidane: And you want her, right DM?
DM: I WANT MARY-SUE!
Yami, Malik Seto and Mokuba: MARY-SUE IS MINE!
Zidane: STUPID EH! (whacks DM across the skull with a sledge hammer) SHADUP ABOUT MARY-SUE! Now SAY YOU'LL MARRY DIANA OR I'LL CRACK YOUR SKULL WIDE OPEN!
DM: (Crying) I'LL MARRY DIANA!
Zidane: Good.right you're both man and wife.you both have my deepest sympathy.
Matthew: (sneaking off with the wedding cake)
Mokuba: HE'S TAKING THE CAKE!!! GET HIM!
Matthew: AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! (runs off with the trolley which the cake is on)
Yami: Is it over?
Zidane: Uh huh.
Yami: MARY-SUE I'M COMING! (runs off)
Seto, Malik and Mokuba: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT! (run after him)
(in the lab)
Adiana: Ok.that should be you two done.this evil scientist thing is eaiser than I thought!
Legolas and Aragon: Must kill Mary-Sue......
Legolas: We are sugar powered zombies.
Aragon: Must stab captain obvious 1!
Legolas: Yet another 1.
KT: I was starting to think we weren't going to be in it anymore this chap!
CM: (in the distance) Sorry.
KH: Ok how'd we hear that?
Yugi and Mary-Sue: (skip past)
KH: (pans Bakura)
KT: (pans Ryou)
(A/N this is to knock them out so the aren't affected by Mary-Sue I know you don't wanna pan them but hey...love hurts.)
Treno: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MARY SUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! RUN FOR COVER!!!!!!!!!!! (runs off with the kids)
KT and KH: WAIT FOR US!!!!!! (drag Ryou and Bakura off with them)
(five minutes after Diana and DM go off on there honeymoon all the girls and Zidane, Leoglas and Aragon are in a tent, CM and Zidane are wearing general uniforms)
CM: Ok Zidane, since you insist you're Blade, what's the plan?
Zidane: The plan...is to....err...KILL MARY-SUE!
The girls: AYE!
Zidane: So we go out search as a team and KILL!!!!!! HER!!!!!!!!!
(all the girls leave the tent)
Mary-Sue: Now boys, no need to fight over me! But if you REALLY want to, go ahead.
Yami: Ok...AIBOU YOU SELF ABSORBED LITTLE TWERP!
(Seto, Yami, Malik and Mokuba start hacking Yugi to pieces with rusty chainsaws.)
The girls form a ring around the perimeter and move in.
KT: Trust Blade the one time you need her she's not here.
Zidane: I AM HERE!
KH: THEN WHY DON'T YOU TURN INTO A DRAGON, FLY OVER THERE AND GET YOUR YAM YAM BACK!?
Zidane: Err.
CM: Yeah Blade!
Zidane: SHUT IT!!!!!!!!!
Blade: (appears in a puff of smoke) Sounds like someone's acting like themselves for an extended period of time! YOU HAVE TO BE MY SLAVE!
Zidane: I'll only be your slave if you can defeat the un-escapable force of.....(turns chibi) CHIBI BLADE!!! (the others close in)
Blade: (gasp) BUT THAT'S MY CHIBI! WE ONLY AGREED TO SWITCH UNCHIBI VERSIONS OF OURSELVES!
Zidane: OUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'M BLADE!
Blade: TWO CAN PLAY AT THIS GAME! (turns chibi) OUUUUUUUU LOOK!!!!!!!!! I'M MONKEY BOY!!!!!! OH THERE'S A GIRL I'M GONNA FLIRT WITH HER! (pulls Zidane's hair) MISS MOST POWERFULLEST HALF DRAGON LADY IN THE ENTIRE WORLD WHOSE NAME IS BLADE, I'M ZIDANE I GOTTA FLIRT WITH YOU CUZ I'M ZIDANE! I LIKE TO KEEP TELLING PEOPLE THAT MY NAME IS ZIDANE!!!
Zidane: (pulling Blade's hair) SHUT UP BEST BANDIT IN THE WORLD GUY!
Blade: (changes to a back to normal and then to a dragon) ZIDANE YOU DOLT, THIS ENDS NOW!
Zidane: (changes back to normal then goes into trance) FINE BY ME YOU OVER GROWN FLUFFY LIZARD!
MEANWHILE!
(The girls have already cut Mary-Sue up into little bite sized pieces and sent those to the shadow realm)
All guys except Marik, Ryou and Bakura who weren't effected: MARY- SUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!1111111111111111
Legolas and the Legolas plushie army: LOOK AT ALL THE 1'S!!!!!!
Aragon: THAT'S IT!!!!!!!! LEGOLAS YOU'RE THE BIGGEST PONCE I'VE EVER MET!
Legolas: Oh bite me.
Aragon: Blow me!
CM: PARTY!!!!!! ZIDANE!!!!!!!
(Blade by this point has dislocated her jaw (you know the way Boa Constricters do to eat prey bigger than there own head?) and tried to swallow Zidane)
Zidane: (trying to keep Blade's mouth open) I'M A LITTLE BUSY AT THE MOMENT!
CM: BLADE SPIT ZIDANE OUT NOW!
Blade: Why?
CM: IF YOU DON'T I'LL TELL THE AUTHOURESS WHAT YOU DID LAST WEEK!
Blade: (spits Zidane out) NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
CM: Well then.it's (looks at watch) 10:30 pm.shall we begin?
Zidane: Agggggggghhhhhh I'm covered in dragon drool!
Blade: Sorry about that.
CM: (snaps her fingers and Ziddys all clean.)
Zidane: OK ALL OF THE KIDS GO BACK TO THERE ROOMS!!!!!
(Everyone under fifteen (except Brittany for the time being)leaves)
Blade: Ok.now what?
Zidane: Well your too big for a start.
Blade: ...(changes back)
Zidane: OOOOOOkkkkkkkkkkkk.(snaps his fingers and enough booze to make Barney Gumble throw up, appear on all the tables that just conveniently happen to be out) before we start the games how's about a quick game of chuck Anzu?
All: YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11
Legolas: MORE 1'S!!!!!!!!!!!
All: SHUT UP!!!
Zidane: Ok according to Yugifan all we need to do is chuck her in this river and she'll turn into a guy.
Yugi: I WANNA DO IT!
Yami: NO I WANNA DO IT!!!!!!!!!!
Yugi: SHUT UP!!!!! YOU GET TO DO EVERYTHING!!!!
Yami: STUPID LITTLE (goes to chock Yugi, who runs away) GET BACK HERE!
CM: I think Blade should do it.
Blade: Really?
Everyone else: WHY HER!?
CM: Cuz Anzu and Mary-Sue tortured Blade on the road trip!
KT and KH: Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh yeah.....(nervous laugh, back away slowly)
Blade: Ok....(puts on protective gloves and throws Anzu into the river)
Anzu: WHAAAA!!!!!!!!!!! I got all wet!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (but it doesn't turn her into a boy...probably cuz she all ready is one...NO OFENSSE TO ANY GUYS READING THIS!)
Blade: And with that out of the way.
Authoress: FIRST OFF, TRUTH OR DARE!
All: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Yami: But the reason we're here is because we WANTED TO GET AWAY FROM THAT!
Blade: TOUGH SHIT!
Freya: But I thought you said that, if CM did another chapter of TaDoP you'd knock her into the next century?
Blade: I know, I just felt like yelling at the fern head.
Yami: (sniffles)
Blade: (flicks her hair away from her face) Neyh.
CM: Ok, well lets all get in a circle shall we?
(everyone sits in a circle)
CM: Ok.......let's-
Michael: (appears in a puff of smoke) *cough* Here's the dares. (gives CM the dares and disappears in a puff of smoke again)
KT: Who was that?
Blade and CM: My big brother.
CM: WHAT!?
Blade: Well...we are sort of family right!?
CM: I guess.
Zidane: Ok, ok, that's nice, what's the first dare!?
Chester: (runs up) Wait! Here's the truths! (gives them to Blade and runs off)
CM: Who...was that?
Blade: Just an old friend.
KH: Can we PLEASE start already!?
CM: Ok, Yami has to slap Yugi across the face as hard as he possibly can.
Yami and Yugi: WHAT!?
CM: You heard me.
Yugi: B-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-b-but...
Yami: THIS ISN'T FAIR!
The other yami and hikaris: (snickering)
CM: We can wait all night Yami and if you still won't I'll- ummm
Yami: You'll do what!?
CM: I'll-
Blade: She'll say who your one and only was back in Egypt.
Yami: (SCREECH!)
Bakura: Who was it?
Blade: (whispers in his ear)
Bakura: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!! (rolls around on the grass)
Blade: (snicker)
Adiana: Right whatever, Yami hurry it up will you!?
Yami: ..........................
Blade: Fine then, IT WAS BI-(Yami covers her mouth)
Yami: OK, OK I'LL DO IT ALL RIGHT!? JUST DON'T TELL THEM!
Yugi: (crying)
Yami: Sorry aibou...(whacks Yugi as hard as he can around the face, which isn't very hard.)
Yugi: That...wasn't too bad.
Marik and Bakura: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA THE PHARAOH CAN'T EVEN HURT HIS HIKARI!
Kairi-chan: Ok, next up?
Crystal: Let's do a truth this time!
Blade: Well then, ok first truth is for Zidane.
Zidane: Mummy.
Blade: Have you EVER chatted up any girls or even had some sort of mini affair since you and Garnet started going serious?
Zidane: Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...............sort of...
Freya: ZIDANE! HOW COULD YOU!?
Zidane: What do you care!? Besides, I bet Frately doesn't know about all the guys you've been with since he left!
Freya: YOU DAMN MONKEY!
Zidane: YA BIG RAT! (both start fighting)
CM: Ok, next dare, for...KT!
KT: BITCH!
CM: (starts crying)
Joey: (takes the dare cards off CM) Let's see here.....you have to stay away from Ryou the rest of the party.
KT: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVIL!!!!!!!!!!!! DOUBLE BITCH!
CM: WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
KT: (storms off to the other side of the circle, away from Ryou.)
Blade: Look on the bright side Chi Mo, if Jasmine were here and it was her dare to stay away from Yugi, she would've said something a LOT worse.
DMG: She can get REAL scary when you try to keep her from Yugi.
Marik: Better keep the fact that Saturn got bored with Yami a secret then!
Blade: Uh huh.
CM: (stops crying) Ok then.
Blade: Right, next truth, for Chi Mo.
CM: Oh no.
Blade: Is it true that you bought those green contact lenses and want to grow your hair as long as mine so you'll look more like Aeris because you fancy Cloud more than you do Jonouchi?
Joey: WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!???
CM: NO WAY! Besides you know why I got them! I HATE HAVING BLUE EYES AND YOU THOUGHT I WAS TEA!
Blade: Well you have to admit, you did resemble her.
CM: I DIDN'T! MY HAIR ISN'T THAT SHORT! IT'S HALF AS LONG AS YOURS! Plus it's not as dark.
Blade: I was kidding! Relax.
CM: Ok then, next dare, for Marik and DMG!
Marik: YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DMG: I like the sound of it so far.
CM: You and DMG have to have a moment, all soppy type.
Marik and DMG:...fair enough.
CM: (a spot light appears a little to the left of the group) Ok go on under the spot light.
They both go under the spotlight and Marik takes DMG's hands.
CM: You have to stutter as well Marik!
Marik: WHAT!?
CM: It has to be REALLY soppy!
DMG: (GROAN.)
Marik: Fine, I can do soppy. I think. Ok right. Here we go...
DMG: If you did it some time before you grew a beard it'd be nice.
Marik: (clears his throat) D-DMG?
DMG: (flutters her eyelashes) Yes?
{A/N CM: Oh dear God, DMG's gonna kill me. Blade: (holding in a bout of laughter) Well what did you expect!?.}
Marik: W-we've k-known each o-other for a long t-time now and...
DMG: What is it sugar?
DMY: (in her soul room laughing her ass off)
Marik: A-and I-I-I-I-I just wanted to say that
DMG: Yes?
Marik: I l-love you!
DMG: I LOVE YOU TOO!
(both glomp each other)
Malik: Whoa, I didn't think they had it in them to do something soppy!
DMG: (glares at CM) Wait to I get my hands on you after this, I'll rip you apart.
CM: AH! (hides behind Blade)
Blade: Ok next truth, for Mai.
Mai: Help me.
Blade: Have you EVER worn jeans?
Mai: Yes.
All: Really!?
Mai: Well of course! The director just likes me in a skirt, that's all.
CM: Ok then, next dare, for......Brittany and Kaira-Chan, you have to resolve, in a civil way mind you, which one of you is more deserving of Yami's love.
Kaira-Chan and Brittany: (glare at each other before going in for the kill.)
Brittany: HE'S MINE!!!!!!!! GAHHHHHH!!!!
Kaira-Chan: YOU'RE A TEN YEAR OLD, WHAT CHANCE DO YOU THINK YOU HAVE WITH A PHARAOH!? HE'S MINE!
Both: DIE BITCH!
CM: Oh well.
Blade: Next up, a truth for Yugi!
Yugi:...........
Blade: Have you ever cheated on a girl-friend before?
Yugi: Emmmmm..............
Adiana: Who wrote these anyway!?
CM: Aquintencies of mine.
Blade: You mean your cousin and the two freaks?
CM: Yup.
Blade: Anyway Yugi, have you?
Yami: He ha-
Yugi: SHUT UP!
Blade: You HAVE to answer Yugi.
Yugi: OK! OK! OK! I went out with Saturn when she got bored with Yami, ok!?
Blade: Awwwwwww the two shrimps.
Yugi: You aren't exactly tall yourself.
Blade: What you see now, but in reality I'm a 18ft high, 43ft long dragon with a 86ft wingspan! Not too shabby when it comes to size if I may say so myself.
Yami: I liked you better when you couldn't talk.
Blade: Hmph.
CM:???
Seto: I agree, she was much sweeter.
Blade: SHADDUP YOU STUPID EH'S! (whacks them with a paper fan)
CM: Ok, well whatever...let's see, next dare. Oh no, another one that's going to get me beaten up...
All: ?
CM: Adiana has to get drunk and belly dance for Hojo.
Adiana: WHAT!?
CM: Could be worse.
Adiana: HOW EXACTLY!?
CM: I do not...know.
All: (anime fall)
CM: Ok then I won't make you do it...Freya can take your place, but you'll have to take her dare ok?
Adiana: Whatever.
Squall: BASTARD!
Adiana: THAT'S IT! (Chases Squall with a butchers knife) GET BACK HERE YOU (Censoring this part out)
CM: Freya!
Freya: (stabbing Zidane with the Dragons Hair) WHAT!?
CM: You have to get drunk and belly dance for Hojo. Tom Ato, bring out the strongest you've got!
Tom: Yes miss. (brings out a mircosopic bottle)
CM: Come on Freya, it's not like we're asking you to drink a giant bottle!
Freya: Well ok....
CM: Here you go.
Freya: (takes the bottle, drinks it and nearly passes out.) Whoa...that stuff sure is...
CM: Strong?
Freya: Give me some more...
CM: Sorry can't, the stuff is TOO strong.
Freya: I SAID GIVE IT TO ME!!!!!!!!
CM: Geez, alright, but if you cause any trouble, we'll have to tie you up. Tom Ato!
Tom: Yes miss. (hands Freya a slightly bigger bottle.)
Freya: This is what I've been missing out on all my life!? This is the best thing I ever *hic* drank!
CM: Slow down, ok now you must dance with Hojo.
(Hojo appears)
Freya: Who?
CM: HOJO!
Freya: (grabs CM by the collar.) WHAT DID YOU CALL ME!?
CM: Tom Ato!
Freya: Ketchup?
Tom: Why do people always make fun of me!? (runs off)
CM: Freya, let me go!
Freya: GIMMIE SOME MORE!
CM: Only if you complete the dare!
Freya: Dare?
CM: DANCE FOR HOJO YOU IDIOT!
Hojo: Come on, dance!
Freya: Is'at Hojo? Isn't arms growing out of your back and feelers growing out of your head a little odd?
Hojo: How dare YOU!?
Freya: SHADDUP! (falls asleep)
Blade: Ok, well first off, (sends Hojo through a time gate.) and now the next truth, for Seto.
Seto: Oh great.
Blade: Did you ever back in Egypt get...oh gross...busy with the pharaohs wife?
Seto: (turns several shades of green before running off into the woods to be sick.)
KH: I take it that's a no, huh?
CM: Next dare! For KH!
KH: Eep.
CM: You gotta squeal your mans nickname before huggleing him almost to death.
KH: Ok......I guess. SNOWBALL!!!!!!!!!!!!! (huggles Bakura almost to death.)
Bakura: MY SPLEEN!
Blade: Right, ok then next up Ryou. Out of the entire cast of YGO (apart from the obvious Anzu) who can you not stand, who gets on your nerves SO much you just wanna hack them up into little tiny pieces and feed them to little baby sharks?
Ryou: Ummmmm....(mumbles something)
All: What?
Ryou: (mumbles it again)
Bakura: For crying out loud, just say it already!
Ryou: Fine then! YUGI!
Yugi: (Is shocked) What!?
All: (gasp)
Ryou: You are such a little twerp! And people actully think your sweeter than me!? EVERYONE'S ALWAYS SAYING HOW YUGI'S THE PERFECT FRIEND! WELL WHAT ABOUT ME!? I'M 100 TIMES BETTER THAN YOU IN EVERY WAY!
KT: GO HUNNY BUNNY! GO!
Ryou: (gasping for breath)
Yugi: (starts crying)
CM: Whoa that was nasty! And it came from Ryou!
Mai: Imagine.
Crystal: Imagine what?
Mai: I didn't mean it like that.
CM: Ok, next up. Crystal.
Crystal: WHOO HOO!
CM: You have to join in the fight with Britanny and Kaira-Chan.
Crystal: OK! (joins in the fight.)
Blade: Mokuba, you next.
Mokuba: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Blade: Have you ever worn a dress?
Mokuba:...............I'd be lying if I said I hadn't.
Blade: This is excluding the time when you switched places with princess Adina.
Mokuba: WHAT!!?? WAIT-
CM: Next! It was meant for Freya, but now it's Adiana's dare, ok Adiana you have to kill Queen Bhrane.
Adiana: Ok.
Bhrane: (appears) WHAT AM I DOING OUT HERE!? EWWWWWWWW! NATURE!
Adiana: (picks up Freya's Dragon Hair (it's a spear btw) and impales Bhrane on it.) There, happy?
CM: Very much so, thanks.
Blade: Right, next a truth for Joey, have you ever actually during the making of the series or at any other time been attracted to Mai?
Joey: NO WAY!
Mai: Like he would ever have a chance anyway.
CM: Good puppy. A dare up for Malik! Let's see how many ginger bread men you can eat!
(after an hour)
Malik: Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhgggggggggggggggggg no more I can't handle any-more...
CM: Well done, you got 97.
Malik: EEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwwww.
Blade: Ok next, ummmmm...we need Jasmine for this.
CM: But her yami's in the middle of...err, we can't disturb them.
Blade: Very well then. (crumbles up the last truth)
CM: One more left, (doesn't have the gumption to look at it first) who HASN'T gone yet?
Blade:...........................
CM: I wonder (goes to check, but Blade lunges forward and tries to grab it off her) BLADE WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?
Blade: Give me the paper Hikari.
CM: Oh I see....hahahahahahaha! Zidane hold her back while I read this!
Zidane: (holds Blade back)
Blade: NOOOOOOOOOO!!!
CM: Ouuuuuuuuu. We have to see what you did in Egypt.
Blade: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
(the screen starts to go white and blurry and shows a room in Yami's palace, Blade's already been here 7 years.)
Pharaoh: Your dreams are in bad taste.
Nanaki: (Blade's Egyptian name) *telapaty* Please forgive me Pharaoh if I have angered you by showing my dream with out your permission. But you must understand one thing, if you kill the tomb robber, bad as he may be, it will only cause you more grief in the long run.
Pharaoh: What are you jabbering on about now Kanaki? Your visions of the future are becoming more and more inaccurate all the time.
Nanaki: Please, listen! You should be more concerned about those who pretend to be loyal to you! Heishin and Seto are two you need to be especially careful of.
Pharaoh: Stop talking such nonsense! If not for me you would be long dead, after all (bends down and takes a few strands of her EXTREMLY long hair *it was about 4 times longer back then, and even now it's down to her waist, WASN'T IT LONG OR WHAT!?*) how can a deaf, blind, mute possibly defend themselves? Even if they USED to have the power to foretell the future.
(flash back ends)
Mai: Whoa, Blade used to say please.
CM: Yami I had no idea what a bastard you really are! HOW DARE YOU TREAT MY YAMI LIKE THAT!? (tries to beat him up and fails miserably.)
KH: I don't ever remember seeing you, or hearing that the pharaoh had a fortune-teller.
Blade: As far as I knew he kept me in a very small room and only he and my sister were allowed to see me. Strange as it may sound I actually valued the little human company I got back then.
Zidane: (crying) That's so sad! (sniffles) Wait, didn't Yami call you a death, blind, mute? So how the hell do you have all your senses now?
Blade: I won't go into any major detail, but I was 'born' a death, blind mute. When the pharaoh blamed me on his wife's death and had me killed, it triggered my ascendsion and becoming a dragon gave me all seven senses.
All: Seven!?
Blade: Dragons have seven.
CM: Cool. (goes back trying to beat Yami up)
Yami: Will you quit it squirt? (flicks CM in-between the eyes.)
CM: OUCH!!!!!!! HEY! I'M TALLER THAN YOU! Puppy are you going to stand there after what he just did!?
Joey: Oh! Right, YOU'RE GOING DOWN YAMI! (tackles Yami)
CM: (sighs) My hero.
Bakura: ENOUGH TALK!!!!! LET THE BOOZING BEGIN!
KT: WAIT! If we start boozing now, we won't be able to play laser tag!
CM: Blade and me will sit this one out, those things give us a headache.
Blade: Em hmm.
KT: Ok! (gives everyone but Yugi, Kaira-Chan, Brittany, Crystal and Freya a laser) first one to hit Yugi wins! Ok Yugi, we'll give you a 30 head start!
Yugi: (screeches like a little girl and runs off into the woods)
KT: OK AFTER HIM!
Zidane: So much for a 30-second head start. (runs off with the others)
Freya: ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ *hic* ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZz
Kaira-Chan, Brittany and Crystal: (rolling around on the floor killing each other.)
(five minutes later)
CM: Hmm...Yugi must be faster than I thought.
Blade: (as a dragon.) It seems so.
Yugi: (runs out of the woods, and his face is all swollen up)
CM: GROSS!
Yugi: DMG GOT ME! (runs around in a blind panic.)
DMG: (runs out of the woods too) Miss me Yugi!? (shoots him in the face again)
Yugi: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
Blade: I think Yugi's had enough today.
DMG: Awwwwwww come on!
Blade: (growls) I SAID THAT'S ENOUGH!
DMG: On second thought. You're right I guess. (puts the laser down.)
Freya: Ouu.....*hic* someone is in a bad mood!
(everyone comes out of the bushes)
Bakura: Can we get drunk now!?
CM: Sure.
(five minutes later.)
CM: (after one beer) Well that my quota over!
Blade: (hasn't had anything) Yeah whatever.
Squall: BASTARD!!!
All: FUCK OFF SQUALL!
Squall: (runs off crying)
Zidane: Ok let's start the first game!!! Hour of Power!
Bakura: HA!!!!!!!!! I'VE NEVER BEEN BEATEN AT THIS GAME BEFORE!!!!!!!
CM: Ok...(takes out the rules) The hour of power does not necessarily need to begin at the top or bottom of an hour. To partake in this journey all of the players involved need a shot glass, a ready supply of beer and a watch or clock with a second hand. To begin this game everyone opens a beer and pours a shot. An official time keeper, that'll be me, gives the mark and everyone drinks their shot of beer. Afterwards everyone fills their shot glass and prepares for the next minute. As soon as sixty seconds have passed then everyone does their second shot of beer. Everyone involved in this spectacle continues drinking one shot of beer, every minute for the next hour. This may not seen like a lot, however, this comes out to drinking 7 1/2 beers in an hour. This is quite a feat for even the most hardy of drinkers. This game is not for the faint of heart of stomach. All participants are prohibited from going to the bathroom for the entire duration. If they attempt to then they are disqualified and must be severly punished. There is no need to break any bones, but there're sure (whoever made the game up) that we can handle it!
Bakura: I KNOW ALL THAT ALL READY!
Kaira chan: Yes but we didn't.
Zidane: RIGHT! *hic* CM's the time keeper! Everyone else, get a shot!
CM: OKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BEGIN!!!!!!!!!!!!
(half an hour later, only KH, Bakura, Marik, DMG and Yugi are still going)
Everyone else: Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
CM: Ok another one!
(after 57 minutes)
DMG: Ohhhhhhhhh..(falls on top of Marik) Hello....
Marik: Nice landing...heh, heh...
(only Yugi and Bakura left)
Bakura: Ugh...
Yugi: Bud...
(At 59: 55)
Bakura: (about to collapse, sends Yugi to the shadow realm) I WON!!!!! (collapses)
Zidane: (pulls himself off the ground) Time for *hic* the next game!
All: (groan and Yugi comes back from the shadow realm)
CM: Ok next game isssssssssssss......Smile! Here's how to play: There is nothing in this world quite like a smile. Warm and inviting, it can be as much a window to the soul as the deepest blue eyes or the most heartfelt of words. When you smile you are saying I love you. You are projecting the elegance of the human spirit. On the other hand, you may simply be, shall we say, aroused.
Blade: I'll never smile again...
Zidane: (rolls his eyes) Like you've ever smiled before *HIC* anyway!
CM: AHEM! As I was saying, that having been said, we present for your enjoyment "Smile", a game which, if nothing else, aims to please. Blah blah blah...OH! Here we go! Six to ten men and woman, more or less evenly divided by gender, should seat themselves around a table large enough to comfortably seat all participants. Drape a heavy tablecloth over the table with ample enough fabric to reach the fabric on all sides. Be sure everyone is well lubricated and in easy reach of the beverage of their choice. You are essentially ready to begin at this point. Each player should...DROP THERE PANTS AND SUCH TO THEIR ANKLES!?
All: O.O!?
CM: Making them not only a bit exposed but unable to flee without much fanfare and great difficulty. At this point, players should pass a dice from left to right in the hopes of, or in fear of in some cases rolling a six. Once a six is rolled, the player responsible must drop to the floor beneath the table, shielded from view, and "do as they wish". The object of their "doings" is to make of the players above crack a smile. Everything goes. Once a player smiles, and we mean a real honest to Mary, Joseph and the baby Jesus smile, the player below may return to their chair. The "smiler" must consume the contents of one entire beverage (one full beer, a full glass of wine etc.), and the rolling continues right of the player just returned from fondling duties. Ummmmm well this games somewhat...different?
Blade: There's over ten of us so I call that, I AM NOT PLAYING!
Freya: I'll *hic* excuse me, sit this one out too.
Zidane: ME TOO!
CM: Ok I'll decide who's playing! Yami, Yugi, Ryou, Bakura, Katy, Kathy, Kaira-Chan, Adiana, DMG and Marik.
Seto, Mai, Malik, Mokuba and Joey: PHEW!
CM: (puts the cloth over one of the tables) Ok you guys, ready?
Everyone who is gonna play: YES!
CM: Ok well we'll go for a walk...while you guys get on with it.
Marik: I wanna roll first! (rolls a six) YAY!!!!!! (dives under the table)
DMG: That was fast...(starts smiling, then giggling and then goes into hysterics)
Marik: (pops back up laughing)
DMG: (starts drinking one pink of beer)
Bakura: Ok my turn! (rolls and gets a six) Well what do ya *hic* know! (dives under the table)
Kathy: ^_^;; HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE!!! (starts drinking a beer)
Bakura: ^_^ (pops up and gives the dice to Ryou)
Ryou: Okkkkkkk...(rolls a six)...?
Yami: _;; There's no way!
Katy: 3 6's in a row is just a bit TOO much!
Adiana: It wouldn't happen to be Zidane's die would it!?
Karia-Chan: Yeah...so?
Adiana: (rolls it and gets a 6) This thing is fixed!
Katy: Trust Zidane...
(meanwhile)
Zidane: (sniggering to himself)
Blade: (hits him with a paper fan) WILL YOU QUIT THAT!?
Mai: Yeah, you git!
Seto: (snigger)
Mokuba: STOP IT SETO, YOU'RE SCARING ME!
Seto: You damn cry baby!
Mokuba: WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Blade: (looks around) Wait a damn minute...where'd my hikari go!?
Freya: Joseph is also missing.
Zidane: Well it doesn't take a genius to figure out we're they've gone.
Blade: ¬_¬;; (walks off)
Mai: Yuck...(follows Blade, Freya and Zidane.)
Mokuba: WHAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Seto: SHUT UP YOU STUPID BRAT!
Mokuba: WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!
Seto: AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! SHUT UP AND I'LL BUY YOU A PONY WHEN WE GET HOME!
Mokuba: (stops crying) Yay! Hey....where'd everyone go!?
Seto: HUH!? AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! We're lost!
Mokuba: WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!
(off somewhere else)
CM: Where'd they go!? PUPPY!!!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU!? I cant fight my way out of a paper bag and these woods are full of bloody great big...(notices a tower in the distance) hey...that didn't used to be there!
(Zidane and the others are already in the tower)
Blade: ZIDANE YOU RAT BASTARD!!! GIVE THAT BACK! (chases Zidane down one of the corriders)
Zidane: HAHA!
Freya: Both of you stop!
Malik: I don't think they heard you...
Mai: I don't think they care...
Freya: Ahhhhhhhhhhhh...then to hell with them! I'm going back because there's bound to be some sort of trap or boss monster or some damn thing in here!
Mai: Good point, I'll go with you!
Freya: (walks out with Mai and Malik following)
Zidane runs into a small room at the end of the corridor and stops dead in his tracks, Blade catches up, grabs her sword back and gets a real eire feeling. The door behind them shuts by itself and scary music starts to play.
Zidane: V___V;; I DON'T LIKE THIS!
Blade: That music's creeping me out...it's like something out of Silent Hill! Zidane?
Zidane: Yeah?
Blade: (terrified) Hold me.
Zidane: (terrified too.) Only if you hold me.
Both: (hold on to each-other, and Kuja's teleportation thing brings them back to where the others are.)
Kuja: RIGHT! Now that we're all here! WHO'S IDEA WAS THIS!?
All: (point to Zidane)
Kuja: WHY AM I NOT SURPRISED!?
Zidane: Neyh.
????: ZIDANE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Treno: Vivi?
Vivi: (comes out of the bushes totally exhausted) IT'S EIKO!
Zidane: (rolls his eyes) Now what's she gotten into!?
Vivi: No it was her!
CM: It was her what?
Vivi: SHE SUMMONED THE EVIL ANIME CHARACTER EATING THINGIE!
All: WHAT!?
TEACET: (comes into the clearing with Eiko on it's back)
Eiko: ZIDANE MY LOVE, IT'S BEEN SO LONG!
Zidane: For me it wasn't long enough...
Eiko: WHAT!? YOU STUPID PIG!
Zidane: Hey, WAIT A MINUTE! IT'S YOUR FAULT GARNET'S DEAD!
Eiko: Well duh! I needed her out of the picture! I didn't mean for it to kill all those other people...but hey.
All: YOU BITCH EIKO!
Eiko: Now your gonna get it! FLUFFY ATTACK WITH YOUR SPORES!
Zidane: YOU NAMED THAT THING FLUFFY!?
Eiko: Shut up you insensitive prick!
Fluffy: (uses its spore attack and everyone falls asleep.)
Kuja: Can I have the pink one Garland? (snore)
Eiko: HA! (stuffs them all in a large crate.)
TEACET: (knocks Eiko out, stuffs her in the crate, seals it and mails it to the Forgotten Continent.)
THE END
Aki: WHAT! This' ending already?
CM: (looks at the, THE END sign) Well that's what those words usually mean!
Aki: But things were just starting to get interesting!
CM: Well, come on folks, let's do this "ending" thing.
Aki: Roll the credits! While that's going on...let's...
Hanna's voice: Do a slide show!
Aki: Okkkkkkkkkkkkkk.how'd we hear that!!!???
CM: Okay! Let the ultimate slide show begin!
Aki: First, let's see a close up of Leene square!
(a guy completely covered in armour walks out in front of the two)
CM: There's the Steel Runner.
Aki: I've never understood why anyone would want to run for 3 hours at a stretch.
CM: Forget that! Can you imagine what the inside of that amour must smell like?
Aki: What a lovely thought, CM. Let's get on with the show OKAY!?
CM: Next let's visit Guardia castle.
(The steel runner runs off and another less amour clad soldier appears)
Aki: Goodness! VERY nice scenery!
CM: But of course, my dear!
Aki: I guess you never took a shot at him, right? HEY didn't he just wink at me there!?
CM: RELAX Aki!!!
(The soldier leaves and a lawyer type person appears)
Aki: Hey it's Pierre!
CM: Wouldn't want anything to do with someone like HIM. Too shifty.he should be put on trail!
Aki: Come on, CM! Live a little! Let your hair down! Get crazy!!!
CM: Yeah thanks, AKI. I'll take that under advisement!!!
(Pierre disappears and a guy with a motor bike attatched to him appears)
CM: Theeeeeeeeeeeeere's Johnny (NOT Johnny Steps).Mr Speed himself!
Aki: Someone ought to tell him to take a permanent pit stop. Look at that hair!
CM: Hey check it out! He's really a tricycle! Pass him!
Aki: Try again when you learn to RIDE.
CM: .........
(Johnny disappears and is replaced by ANOTHER knight)
CM: Hey there's that stuffed-shirt, Cyrus!
Aki: He IS pretty handsome, though.
CM: But where does he buy his clothes?
Aki: Hey did you hear? He plucks his eyebrows!
CM: You've got to be joking!
(Cyrus disappears and is replaced by a traveler type person)
Aki: Hi Toma! Now he's definitely my type!
CM: He's just a flake.
Aki: .......Probably has a dozen girlfriends.
(Toma is replaced by a cave-man.)
Aki: What about him? That Kino guy?
CM: Total Neanderthal! Throw him a bone!
Aki: But he's honest. That's kind of attractive.
CM: He walks like a DUCK!!!
Aki: Well he'll never hurt anyone...
CM: He's really very gentle, isn't he?
(Kino disappears and Blade comes running up)
Blade: What ARE you two doing!? I thought you said something about a nice little slide show?
CM: Blade!
Aki: So we got a little carried away!
Blade: A little? No one has a bloody clue what you two are talking about!
Both: Sorry.
CM: Well now, where do we go?
Aki: Some place fun!
Blade: How about going HOME!?
Aki: Didn't I just say, "Some place fun!"!?
CM: Let's go toooooooooooooo JHOTO!
Aki: AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (runs off)
Blade and CM: (laugh)
CM: Seriously though were will we go?
Blade: (folds arms) Hmm...how about a sequel to Kamp Kuja?
CM: Well...Hey I know! How about, "I'M AN ANIME CHARACTER, GET ME OUTTA HERE!"?
Blade: Original hikari...original.
CM: Then...what about trying to do a serious fic?
Blade: Are you capable of doing something like that?
CM: I dunno...wait I already have done one!
Blade: But Hikari, IT'S FF VII!
Cloud: And WHAT is wrong with FF VII!?
CM: Nothing!
Blade: Besides none of us liked it! You kept torturing Vincent!!!
CM: The male you...
Vincent: PARDON!?
Blade: !?
CM: Oops...(Sends them both to Terra, ahhhhhhh the powers of an authoress) Ok...well what do you guys think? Should I try something serious for a change? Or a sequel to KK or...should I remove all my stories, change my name and move to Alaska? My fate is in your hands! Errrr....
Yugi: I don't think this is such a good idea! (is killed by a swarm of rabid fangirls)
Blade: See you in the sequel! You know this whole thing makes ...NO sense!