Title:What if

Author: Mariedex

Spoilers:After FO, a year in the future.

Disclaimer: The characters in the story are the sole property of Hank Steinberg, Jerry Bruckheimer, and CBS. No copyright infringement is intended.

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Samantha had to make the hardest decision of her life... to leave.

Chapter 5:

Jack looked straight ahead for a while, not saying anything. Sam just looked at him. Marie and I are getting a divorce, the papers should be ready in a couple weeks.

Sam whispered, she couldn't believe what he was saying. Jack pulled over and turned off the ignition to the car. This was partly his reason for coming. He wanted to be the one to tell her.

It just didn't work. I tried, but we just couldn't get past everything. It wasn't fair to her or the girls to keep trying. Marie and I just kept fighting and it was hurting Hannah and Katie. One day, Marie and I had teacher's conference with Hannah's teacher. Apparently Hannah was going around yelling at everyone. Starting fights. When the teacher wanted to know why, Hannah just told her that it was just what you do. That you fight with people. Sam, Hannah thought that mine and Marie's fights were how we communicated. That registered as love. That was when I knew, we had to end it. I couldn't keep pussy footing around the issue.

Sam honestly didn't know what to say. This was the last thing that she every expected.

In two weeks, it will all be over.

You didn't lose custody?

No, it's shared. Not like her lawyer didn't try. He tried to bring up us as a reason that I was a unfit father. Luckily, Marie stopped. She hates me, but not that much. My lawyer said that the judge very easily could have seen that as me being an unfit parent. Given the length of time we were together and the fact that I was your boss -- It wouldn't have been seen as a one-time mistake. So... back to the case. Yes the wife could have gotten full custody.

Jack, I'm sorry.

Don't be. I'm not. The truth is it wasn't ever going to work even if you hadn't been in the picture. Marie and I just drifted apart and nothing was going to change that. I guess I just wanted you to hear it from me about the divorce, not Danny.

Sam smiled at him. She knew that this must have been hard for him. He had a habit of beating up on himself. Are you okay?

Yeah, I'm fine. The hardest thing is the girls. Telling them that I am not going to come home, but they can visit my place. Hannah didn't talk to me for weeks and Katie doesn't quite understand but I think Hannah has been trying to explain it to her because lately she just gives me an evil eye before she hugs me. LIke she knows that she is supposed to be made at me but doesn't know why.

Sam wasn't quite sure what to say, so she decided to simply say nothing. Jack must have taken her silence as a hint and started the car back up. Divorce' that word kept rolling around in her head. All of those times when she chided him about it. All those arguments they had. She never thought that he would actually go through with it. She never thought that Marie and Jack would end. They had too much history, they had the girls. Suddenly, the pang of guilt hit her. Ryan. He had just lost two girls and he lost another that he never even knew he had. No, she thought, he didn't lose Hannah and Katie. Nothing had changed. He never knew about Ryan, that was the decision she made, so that he could have Hanna and Katie, so he could make his marriage work. But it hadn't. Now what?

Sam just closed her eyes and let the sounds of the car's motor soothe her. The case that was what she needed to think about. Not her messed up life. A little girl was missing and they had to find her. She turned on the overhead light and started going through the file again. She must be missing something.

When they got back to the office everyone was sitting around the conference table talking about their facts. None of the information that anyone had gotten was any good and they were no closer to finding the little girl. Anna suggested that they call it a night. Perhaps some sleep would help everyone. That was the difference between Anna and Jack. Jack thrived on adrenaline. He needed those overnighters to work at his best. Anna, on the other hand, was a lot more cautious. She liked to sleep on things, let facts ramble around in her brain. Usually, when they would all reconvene the next morning Anna would set them on some new lead that brought them in the right direction. It was amazing that two FBI agents in the same field could have two distinct styles. At times she missed Jacks adrenaline. She missed those late nights. But at this moment in her life, being able to go home at night sounded very good.

Danny had suggested that he and Sam have dinner. Jack was going to stay and work a little while. Sam was actually relieved when Jack didn't take the invite. They stopped by the daycare and picked Ryan up. The smile on her face when she saw Sam was priceless. On the drive home, Sam said nothing. She was still processing what Jack had told her.

Danny held Ryan as they walked into her house.

Sam said simply.

He told you. Danny as he went to put Ryan in her highchair and proceeded to feed her. This was one of the things he always did when he came to visit. He took over for Sam for a while. He had always thought that she was insane to do this all on her own. So when he could, he helped.

It's funny, you know.

That now.

Yeah. All those times I chided him. God, Danny you should have heard some of our fights. I would get so mad at him. He would come over and tell me that he loved me and then get up in the middle of the night to go home. It was such a freaking roller coaster ride. So I decide to get off and he goes and gets a divorce.



I never thought he would do it.

He's been a lot happier since.

What do you mean?

He has just seemed a lot more relieved, like the decision was made and there was no more debate.

He hated the debate.

Danny paused a moment not quite knowing how to say this.



I think you leaving was good for him. It gave him some distance to figure things out. For both of you.



But he was the one who suggested to VanDoren that the Minnesota office needed some help.

He told me he wanted to tell me himself.

Okay, truth here. If he wanted you back, what would you do?