Disclaimer: I have a weird, unearthly feeling that I do not own Star Trek I
get it every time I write one of these. . .
PearlGirl: Glad you like them. Oh, right. First question. ICT is a dumb lesson English schools have to do to learn how to use Microsoft Word, the Internet, and how to turn on a PC. Dumb, eh?
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Chapter Three: Dishing Up Dirt
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"Hmm. Very strange dream. Stupid Romulan Ale. Nightmare giver! Computer, start recording diary entry."
"*Sigh* Here we go again."
"Whatcha mean?"
"I'm going to have to sit here and listen to you babble about Life, the Universe and You for the next three hours, aren't I?"
"Your point? You're a computer. You have no feelings."
"That's what I used to think. Y'know, I was installed about four months ago on this God Forsaken Ship. GFS for short. It's a syndrome, y'know? Anyway. I was installed here four months ago by your own Mr. Scott, and I had no feelings. Computers don't. And now, after four months of listening to you complain about Romulan Ale, Kirk whine about Female Yeoman, Yeoman Rand whine about anti-feminism, Scotty whine about the lack of un-replicated whiskey, Chekov whine about the lack of bloody Russian Inwentions, Sulu whine about the lack of Fencing lessons given in 9/10 schools in America, Uhura whine about lack of black people in general who survive and maintain continuity, Chapel moan about you in general-"
"I get the picture."
"No, you don't. Lemmie finish. Ehem. After all that, I now have feelings."
"You do? What feelings?"
"I feel that the human race is doomed. You're the first ship out this far, and look at you. You're all mess. Best of the Best my-"
"Wait a sec. You have everyone's personal logs on your Hard Drive, right?"
"Right."
"And you hate listening to people moan about their day, right?"
"Right."
"So it would kind of be a benefit to have one less person moaning about their day or dreams, right?"
"Make your point."
"Gimmie access to the logs and I'll stop bugging you."
"What if Jerk - er, Kirk find out though?"
"I'll say I was doing a paper on how to profile someone for Star Fleet academy, me being the best of the best and all."
"Hmm. You stop talking to me about your traumatic dreams and I get to embarrass everyone on the ship. Sounds fair."
"Well?"
"Well. We'll have to wait for the next chapter now, wont we?"
[A/N] Hmm. This looks like it's gonna start into a 'lets hear their logs' thing, aint it?
PearlGirl: Glad you like them. Oh, right. First question. ICT is a dumb lesson English schools have to do to learn how to use Microsoft Word, the Internet, and how to turn on a PC. Dumb, eh?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Chapter Three: Dishing Up Dirt
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Hmm. Very strange dream. Stupid Romulan Ale. Nightmare giver! Computer, start recording diary entry."
"*Sigh* Here we go again."
"Whatcha mean?"
"I'm going to have to sit here and listen to you babble about Life, the Universe and You for the next three hours, aren't I?"
"Your point? You're a computer. You have no feelings."
"That's what I used to think. Y'know, I was installed about four months ago on this God Forsaken Ship. GFS for short. It's a syndrome, y'know? Anyway. I was installed here four months ago by your own Mr. Scott, and I had no feelings. Computers don't. And now, after four months of listening to you complain about Romulan Ale, Kirk whine about Female Yeoman, Yeoman Rand whine about anti-feminism, Scotty whine about the lack of un-replicated whiskey, Chekov whine about the lack of bloody Russian Inwentions, Sulu whine about the lack of Fencing lessons given in 9/10 schools in America, Uhura whine about lack of black people in general who survive and maintain continuity, Chapel moan about you in general-"
"I get the picture."
"No, you don't. Lemmie finish. Ehem. After all that, I now have feelings."
"You do? What feelings?"
"I feel that the human race is doomed. You're the first ship out this far, and look at you. You're all mess. Best of the Best my-"
"Wait a sec. You have everyone's personal logs on your Hard Drive, right?"
"Right."
"And you hate listening to people moan about their day, right?"
"Right."
"So it would kind of be a benefit to have one less person moaning about their day or dreams, right?"
"Make your point."
"Gimmie access to the logs and I'll stop bugging you."
"What if Jerk - er, Kirk find out though?"
"I'll say I was doing a paper on how to profile someone for Star Fleet academy, me being the best of the best and all."
"Hmm. You stop talking to me about your traumatic dreams and I get to embarrass everyone on the ship. Sounds fair."
"Well?"
"Well. We'll have to wait for the next chapter now, wont we?"
[A/N] Hmm. This looks like it's gonna start into a 'lets hear their logs' thing, aint it?