Chapter 3: Off to Bree we go!
Sam and Frodo leave The Green Dragon and say good-bye to Rosie. Sam is more than a little tipsy. As they walk up the road towards Bag End, Laina runs up, pushes Sam in a ditch, and runs away, giggling.
She looks different, although it's definitely still her. Her hair is up in a swinging ponytail, but it's longer now. Also, as opposed to the jeans and tank top she was wearing before, she's now wearing black sweat pants and a tight red shirt.
Sighing with exasperation, Frodo pulls Sam out of the ditch. He's more or less gotten used to Laina by now. He bids Sam good night, and continues up towards Bag End.
He goes in the house, which has a creepy feel to it. He feels that someone is there. "Laina?" he call out.
Suddenly someone grabs his shoulder, scaring him, and demands "Is it secret, is it safe?"
"Gandalf! What are you talking about?"
"The ring stupid," says Laina, as she pops out, grinning. "You should have seen your face."
"Don't tell me she's still here." Gandalf groans.
"Nice to see you too!" she shoots back. "Heey, I thought you were supposed to come back some 20 odd years later."
"It has been some 20 odd years later." Gandalf answers.
"Than why haven't I aged at all?" she demands.
"Look, this isn't important right now-Frodo, do you still have the ring?"
"Yes, it's right here." Frodo burrows through his trunk until he pulls it out, still in the same envelope.
Gandalf grabs it and throws it into the fire
"Hey-" Frodo starts
"Oh relax short stuff, nothing's going to happen to it."
Sure enough Gandalf pulls it out of the fire after a few minutes, and it's completely unharmed. He convinces Frodo to take it, and asks if there's anything written on it.
"No," Frodo says, and Gandalf breathes a sigh of relief.
"Yes there is....in Mordor writing...very few people can read it but I know what it says! One ring to rule them all, one ring to find them, one ring to bring them all and in the darkness bind them. See? Right there! You should have seen is sooner!" Laina admonishes.
"Then it is as it feared."
"Oh, spare me the melodrama. It's the One Ring....wow."
"The One Ring? What's going on?" Frodo asks, confused.
"This is boring. I'm going to sleep. Wake me up when you grab Sam." Laina goes into a bedroom and curls up on the bed. She sleeps for a few minutes then comes back in just as Gandalf is telling Frodo that he has to take the ring to Bree.
"Duck," she says, yawning.
They both look at her for an explanation.
"Sam is outside the window, but you don't know it's him. So you're supposed to tell Frodo to get down and then you grab him."
Gandalf looks at her than reaches out the window and grabs Sam.
"Don't me mean to him....he didn't mean to overhear you...he was just cutting the grass, even though it's really late....just send him with Frodo...he could use a buddy, I think I might annoy him too much." Laina mumbles as she tries to wake herself up.
"Fine, all three of you go to Mordor I-"
"What? You're sending her with us? Are you insane??" Frodo shrieks.
"Oh, come on Frodo, you know I'll show up anyway...I might as well just come along."
"But, but, but" Frodo splutters.
Gandalf just sighs and rolls his eyes. "I'm going to see the head of my class. He is both wise and powerful..."
"I wouldn't do that if I were you," Laina warns. "He's lock you up and try to kill you. He's fallen to the ring."
"Silly girl. You know not of what you speak."
"Ooh, fancy words. Fine don't listen to me. But I'm telling ya..."
Gandalf takes Sam, Frodo and Laina into the woods and then leaves on his horse. (a/n: it's not Shadowfax at that point, is it?).
Laina, Sam and Frodo are walking across country when Sam suddenly stops at a random scarecrow. Frodo stops and looks at him, but Laina just heaves an exaggerated sigh.
"That's nice Sam, but just keep moving."
"One more step-"
"Look, Sam, we care, really, we do....but, we don't. Just keep walking...."
"And it's the farthest I'll have ever been from the Shire." he finishes, glaring at Laina.
"Wow, you don't get out much, do you? Now move it!" she yells, pushing him and they continue.
Meanwhile, Gandalf heads towards Orthanc to speak with Saruman.
"Dark grows the day and Gandalf rides forth to seek my council. For that is why you have come, is it not old friend?"
"Do you have any idea how little sense that makes?? Like, at all? You can't be narrating and talking to Gandalf at the same time. And even if you were talking to Gandalf the whole time, how would he have heard you when he was riding up the path. It doesn't make sense!"
"Who are you?"
"Ooh, your all-powerfulness didn't tell you that, did it? I'm Laina!"
"Why are you here?? I thought I sent you with the hobbits!!" Gandalf was very agitated.
"You did, but come on Gandy, it's me."
"Anyway, Saruman and I need to talk...why don't you go....away."
"I'm warning you, that's a really bad idea....but if you insist...."
Gandalf and Saruman walk around the grounds of Orthanc, and Gandalf tells of the discovery of the ring. Saruman takes him inside, and uncovers the Seeing Stone.
"Hey cool! It's a lost Palantíri! Guess what Gandalf....Saruman's lost his will to the ring! He's been tricking you all along! He uses this to talk to Sauron!" Laina seems perfectly alright with this, laughing as she throws some of Saruman's stuff around.
"Is this true Saruman?" Gandalf demands.
"I-I-I-yes. Face it Gandalf. The dark side is going to win. Join me Luke! Er-ah-I mean....we should join Sauron, so we don't die."
"Tell me friend when did Saruman the wise abandon reason for madness?"
"Well, gee whiz, if you're going to be like that about it, I'll just have to kick your ass."
Gandalf and Saruman start fighting with their staffs while Laina laughs at the thought that they're not actually touching each other. "I tried to warn you..." she gasps.
Eventually Saruman gets Gandalf's staff and gives Gandalf one last chance to turn to the dark side. Unfortunately for him, Gandalf refuses, and Saruman throws him at the ceiling.
"Ouch. That's really going to hurt in the morning."
Sam and Frodo are walking through the cornfield when Laina appears again. "Did you miss me?" she asks.
Frodo and Sam just look at her like the answer is obvious and keep walking. After awhile, they go through a bend in the path and when Sam and Laina go through, Frodo isn't there.
"Dun dun duuuuuuun." Laina sings out.
Sam immediately begins to scream and panic. "Mr. Frodo! Mr. Frodo!!" he yells, running around in circles.
"Sam, calm down!" Laina yells, trying to get him to stop hyperventilating. Luckily, Frodo comes back before he passes out.
"Sam, what's wrong?" he asks calmly.
"It's just something that the old dude said," Sam replies.
"He said not to lose you, Frodo." Laina says, cutting the conversation off.
"We're still in the Shire, Sam," Frodo says, trying to ignore Laina. "What could possibly happen?"
"Famous last words," Laina mutters. Then she steps back and says, in a happy, perky, "cheerleader" voice, "This!"
With perfect timing, Merry and Pippin fly through the fields and knock over Sam and Frodo. Laina starts laughing uncontrollably, because when this scene is watched in slow motion, Frodo gets hit in the mouth with lettuce.
Picking themselves up, Pippin realises that it's Frodo, and says so to Merry.
"Sure, blatantly ignore me." Laina says, grinning.
"Laina!" the two younger hobbits scream and they hug like a reunion of...people who haven't seen each other in a long time.
While they act like fools, Sam looks around and realises what's going on. "You've been into Farmer Maggot's crop!" he accuses.
"Well, duh!" Laina says. "What did you think? They were just randomly frolicking through his cornfield?"
Before Sam can retort back, they hear Farmer Maggot coming.
"Be a dear and hold these, Sam." says Pippin, while he and Merry pile vegetables into his arms. Then they grab Frodo and run off, with Laina right behind them.
Sam being the idiot he is, waits until Farmer Maggot is about two feet away before dropping the veggies and running after them.
Pippin is ahead of everyone and stops just before rolling off the edge of the hill. Merry and Frodo slam into him, but they still manage to stay on. Laina, knowing what will happen, moves out of the way and yells at them to look out.
Sam comes running up not looking, and slams into the back of Frodo, knocking them all off the hill, except for Laina.
She watches them roll down the hill then slides down after them, laughing all the way.
The hobbits untangle themselves. Frodo gets up and looks down the road. Pippin and Merry say something about that being close, and look through the broken vegetables. Sam picks himself up, muttering about trusting a Brandybuck and a Took.
"That's not nice, Sam! You should never judge people by their last name. That's discrimination. No discrimination would make the world a better place!" Laina admonishes.
"Besides," Merry adds. "It was a shortcut."
"A shortcut?"
"Yeah."
"To what, exactly?"
"Mushrooms!" Pippin excitedly interrupts, spotting some a few feet away.
The three of them run to the mushrooms, but Laina spots Frodo looking down the road. Suddenly remembering what's about to happen, she screams and panics, yelling about the black riders.
"Get off the road!" Frodo calls, but the other 3 hobbits are to busy picking mushrooms, and Laina is rooted to the spot-she really doesn't like the Nazgûl.
"Get off the road! Quick!" he yells, and this time they listen. The hobbits run to hide under a tree, and Pippin grabs Laina, who finally comes to her senses.
The Nazgûl comes and stops right by the tree. The hobbits and Laina try to be perfectly silent, and Frodo starts to be drawn to the ring.
Laina is squished between Merry and Sam, and gets really upset when the bugs start to come out. As the spider crawls down Merry's shoulder, she almost screams, as she's terrified of spiders.
Laina pokes Sam on the shoulder and motions to him to stop Frodo from taking the ring. Sam reaches over and grabs Frodo's arm just as Merry throws the bag of mushrooms to distract the Black Rider. They all get up and run as fast and as far as they can.
When they finally stop to rest, it's dark.
"What's going on?" Pippin asks, trying to get Laina to stop crying.
"What was that?" Merry demands, while Frodo tries to think of what to say.
"Black Rider...scary...I hate it..." Laina sobs.
"That Black Rider was looking for something...or someone. Frodo?" Merry continues.
"Sam and I have to get to Bree." Frodo finally answers. "And I suppose we really should take her with us." he adds.
Merry takes a minute to digest this, and then nods. "The Buckleberry Ferry," he suggests.
As they head for the ferry, several Black Riders give chase. They try to cut off Frodo, but he gets away. They all keep running, but Frodo is far behind. When the others reach the ferry, they set off, screaming for him to hurry. He jumps from the dock and the Black Riders stop.
Laina, despite how scared she is, starts to laugh, causing strange looks from the hobbits. "I'm sorry," she giggles. "But wouldn't it be funny if Frodo missed the ferry and landed in the water?"
1
Sam and Frodo leave The Green Dragon and say good-bye to Rosie. Sam is more than a little tipsy. As they walk up the road towards Bag End, Laina runs up, pushes Sam in a ditch, and runs away, giggling.
She looks different, although it's definitely still her. Her hair is up in a swinging ponytail, but it's longer now. Also, as opposed to the jeans and tank top she was wearing before, she's now wearing black sweat pants and a tight red shirt.
Sighing with exasperation, Frodo pulls Sam out of the ditch. He's more or less gotten used to Laina by now. He bids Sam good night, and continues up towards Bag End.
He goes in the house, which has a creepy feel to it. He feels that someone is there. "Laina?" he call out.
Suddenly someone grabs his shoulder, scaring him, and demands "Is it secret, is it safe?"
"Gandalf! What are you talking about?"
"The ring stupid," says Laina, as she pops out, grinning. "You should have seen your face."
"Don't tell me she's still here." Gandalf groans.
"Nice to see you too!" she shoots back. "Heey, I thought you were supposed to come back some 20 odd years later."
"It has been some 20 odd years later." Gandalf answers.
"Than why haven't I aged at all?" she demands.
"Look, this isn't important right now-Frodo, do you still have the ring?"
"Yes, it's right here." Frodo burrows through his trunk until he pulls it out, still in the same envelope.
Gandalf grabs it and throws it into the fire
"Hey-" Frodo starts
"Oh relax short stuff, nothing's going to happen to it."
Sure enough Gandalf pulls it out of the fire after a few minutes, and it's completely unharmed. He convinces Frodo to take it, and asks if there's anything written on it.
"No," Frodo says, and Gandalf breathes a sigh of relief.
"Yes there is....in Mordor writing...very few people can read it but I know what it says! One ring to rule them all, one ring to find them, one ring to bring them all and in the darkness bind them. See? Right there! You should have seen is sooner!" Laina admonishes.
"Then it is as it feared."
"Oh, spare me the melodrama. It's the One Ring....wow."
"The One Ring? What's going on?" Frodo asks, confused.
"This is boring. I'm going to sleep. Wake me up when you grab Sam." Laina goes into a bedroom and curls up on the bed. She sleeps for a few minutes then comes back in just as Gandalf is telling Frodo that he has to take the ring to Bree.
"Duck," she says, yawning.
They both look at her for an explanation.
"Sam is outside the window, but you don't know it's him. So you're supposed to tell Frodo to get down and then you grab him."
Gandalf looks at her than reaches out the window and grabs Sam.
"Don't me mean to him....he didn't mean to overhear you...he was just cutting the grass, even though it's really late....just send him with Frodo...he could use a buddy, I think I might annoy him too much." Laina mumbles as she tries to wake herself up.
"Fine, all three of you go to Mordor I-"
"What? You're sending her with us? Are you insane??" Frodo shrieks.
"Oh, come on Frodo, you know I'll show up anyway...I might as well just come along."
"But, but, but" Frodo splutters.
Gandalf just sighs and rolls his eyes. "I'm going to see the head of my class. He is both wise and powerful..."
"I wouldn't do that if I were you," Laina warns. "He's lock you up and try to kill you. He's fallen to the ring."
"Silly girl. You know not of what you speak."
"Ooh, fancy words. Fine don't listen to me. But I'm telling ya..."
Gandalf takes Sam, Frodo and Laina into the woods and then leaves on his horse. (a/n: it's not Shadowfax at that point, is it?).
Laina, Sam and Frodo are walking across country when Sam suddenly stops at a random scarecrow. Frodo stops and looks at him, but Laina just heaves an exaggerated sigh.
"That's nice Sam, but just keep moving."
"One more step-"
"Look, Sam, we care, really, we do....but, we don't. Just keep walking...."
"And it's the farthest I'll have ever been from the Shire." he finishes, glaring at Laina.
"Wow, you don't get out much, do you? Now move it!" she yells, pushing him and they continue.
Meanwhile, Gandalf heads towards Orthanc to speak with Saruman.
"Dark grows the day and Gandalf rides forth to seek my council. For that is why you have come, is it not old friend?"
"Do you have any idea how little sense that makes?? Like, at all? You can't be narrating and talking to Gandalf at the same time. And even if you were talking to Gandalf the whole time, how would he have heard you when he was riding up the path. It doesn't make sense!"
"Who are you?"
"Ooh, your all-powerfulness didn't tell you that, did it? I'm Laina!"
"Why are you here?? I thought I sent you with the hobbits!!" Gandalf was very agitated.
"You did, but come on Gandy, it's me."
"Anyway, Saruman and I need to talk...why don't you go....away."
"I'm warning you, that's a really bad idea....but if you insist...."
Gandalf and Saruman walk around the grounds of Orthanc, and Gandalf tells of the discovery of the ring. Saruman takes him inside, and uncovers the Seeing Stone.
"Hey cool! It's a lost Palantíri! Guess what Gandalf....Saruman's lost his will to the ring! He's been tricking you all along! He uses this to talk to Sauron!" Laina seems perfectly alright with this, laughing as she throws some of Saruman's stuff around.
"Is this true Saruman?" Gandalf demands.
"I-I-I-yes. Face it Gandalf. The dark side is going to win. Join me Luke! Er-ah-I mean....we should join Sauron, so we don't die."
"Tell me friend when did Saruman the wise abandon reason for madness?"
"Well, gee whiz, if you're going to be like that about it, I'll just have to kick your ass."
Gandalf and Saruman start fighting with their staffs while Laina laughs at the thought that they're not actually touching each other. "I tried to warn you..." she gasps.
Eventually Saruman gets Gandalf's staff and gives Gandalf one last chance to turn to the dark side. Unfortunately for him, Gandalf refuses, and Saruman throws him at the ceiling.
"Ouch. That's really going to hurt in the morning."
Sam and Frodo are walking through the cornfield when Laina appears again. "Did you miss me?" she asks.
Frodo and Sam just look at her like the answer is obvious and keep walking. After awhile, they go through a bend in the path and when Sam and Laina go through, Frodo isn't there.
"Dun dun duuuuuuun." Laina sings out.
Sam immediately begins to scream and panic. "Mr. Frodo! Mr. Frodo!!" he yells, running around in circles.
"Sam, calm down!" Laina yells, trying to get him to stop hyperventilating. Luckily, Frodo comes back before he passes out.
"Sam, what's wrong?" he asks calmly.
"It's just something that the old dude said," Sam replies.
"He said not to lose you, Frodo." Laina says, cutting the conversation off.
"We're still in the Shire, Sam," Frodo says, trying to ignore Laina. "What could possibly happen?"
"Famous last words," Laina mutters. Then she steps back and says, in a happy, perky, "cheerleader" voice, "This!"
With perfect timing, Merry and Pippin fly through the fields and knock over Sam and Frodo. Laina starts laughing uncontrollably, because when this scene is watched in slow motion, Frodo gets hit in the mouth with lettuce.
Picking themselves up, Pippin realises that it's Frodo, and says so to Merry.
"Sure, blatantly ignore me." Laina says, grinning.
"Laina!" the two younger hobbits scream and they hug like a reunion of...people who haven't seen each other in a long time.
While they act like fools, Sam looks around and realises what's going on. "You've been into Farmer Maggot's crop!" he accuses.
"Well, duh!" Laina says. "What did you think? They were just randomly frolicking through his cornfield?"
Before Sam can retort back, they hear Farmer Maggot coming.
"Be a dear and hold these, Sam." says Pippin, while he and Merry pile vegetables into his arms. Then they grab Frodo and run off, with Laina right behind them.
Sam being the idiot he is, waits until Farmer Maggot is about two feet away before dropping the veggies and running after them.
Pippin is ahead of everyone and stops just before rolling off the edge of the hill. Merry and Frodo slam into him, but they still manage to stay on. Laina, knowing what will happen, moves out of the way and yells at them to look out.
Sam comes running up not looking, and slams into the back of Frodo, knocking them all off the hill, except for Laina.
She watches them roll down the hill then slides down after them, laughing all the way.
The hobbits untangle themselves. Frodo gets up and looks down the road. Pippin and Merry say something about that being close, and look through the broken vegetables. Sam picks himself up, muttering about trusting a Brandybuck and a Took.
"That's not nice, Sam! You should never judge people by their last name. That's discrimination. No discrimination would make the world a better place!" Laina admonishes.
"Besides," Merry adds. "It was a shortcut."
"A shortcut?"
"Yeah."
"To what, exactly?"
"Mushrooms!" Pippin excitedly interrupts, spotting some a few feet away.
The three of them run to the mushrooms, but Laina spots Frodo looking down the road. Suddenly remembering what's about to happen, she screams and panics, yelling about the black riders.
"Get off the road!" Frodo calls, but the other 3 hobbits are to busy picking mushrooms, and Laina is rooted to the spot-she really doesn't like the Nazgûl.
"Get off the road! Quick!" he yells, and this time they listen. The hobbits run to hide under a tree, and Pippin grabs Laina, who finally comes to her senses.
The Nazgûl comes and stops right by the tree. The hobbits and Laina try to be perfectly silent, and Frodo starts to be drawn to the ring.
Laina is squished between Merry and Sam, and gets really upset when the bugs start to come out. As the spider crawls down Merry's shoulder, she almost screams, as she's terrified of spiders.
Laina pokes Sam on the shoulder and motions to him to stop Frodo from taking the ring. Sam reaches over and grabs Frodo's arm just as Merry throws the bag of mushrooms to distract the Black Rider. They all get up and run as fast and as far as they can.
When they finally stop to rest, it's dark.
"What's going on?" Pippin asks, trying to get Laina to stop crying.
"What was that?" Merry demands, while Frodo tries to think of what to say.
"Black Rider...scary...I hate it..." Laina sobs.
"That Black Rider was looking for something...or someone. Frodo?" Merry continues.
"Sam and I have to get to Bree." Frodo finally answers. "And I suppose we really should take her with us." he adds.
Merry takes a minute to digest this, and then nods. "The Buckleberry Ferry," he suggests.
As they head for the ferry, several Black Riders give chase. They try to cut off Frodo, but he gets away. They all keep running, but Frodo is far behind. When the others reach the ferry, they set off, screaming for him to hurry. He jumps from the dock and the Black Riders stop.
Laina, despite how scared she is, starts to laugh, causing strange looks from the hobbits. "I'm sorry," she giggles. "But wouldn't it be funny if Frodo missed the ferry and landed in the water?"
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