Chapter 6. Wow!
Disclaimers: I own half of Middle Earth! Really, I do! I don't own the books or movies, or actors, or rights to anything, but I own half of ME! My friend and I got bored one day and divided it up. Oh, and of course I own Laina (me)
Flames will be used to make hot chocolate!
Chapter 6: The Quest Begins (dun dun duuuuun)
The Fellowship (plus Laina) are walking along.
"Does anybody else hear that music?" Laina asks.
They all look at her as though she's insane. Which, of course, she is.
"No really, there's this really pretty music. It's like doo doo doooo do...oh never mind."
They reach the crest of a hill and the music that Laina hears heightens intensity. Suddenly she belts out the tune to Phantom of the Opera. The others stop and turn to look at her. (a/n: I always think that the Phantom music is going to play there. It just seems to fit.)
"What?" she responds to their odd stares.
Eventually they stop on a rocky hill with ruins to rest. Sam cooks while Frodo and Aragorn watches Boromir try to teach Merry and Pippin how to use a sword.
***15 minutes before the Fellowship arrived***
"Buahahaha!" Molly giggles. (See chapter four)
She runs and hides where Aragorn will hide in a little bit, giggling to herself.
***Back to where we were***
"That's it, move your feet," Aragorn tells the hobbits while Merry and Pippin compliment each other on their 'excellent' swordsmanship constantly.
A few feet away, Gimli starts in with Gandalf. "If anyone were to ask my opinion, which I note they're not-"
"Because you're a dwarf, and nobody CARES what the hell you think." Laina tells him.
Gimli starts to get very angry, but Gandalf stops him and gets him to continue. "I note we're taking the long way round. Gandalf, we could go through the mines of Moria." Gimli tells him.
"No way." Laina insists, stomping her foot.
"I have to agree with her." Gandalf says. "I would only go through the mines if there were no other choice."
Laina spits in Gimli's face. "Ha!"
Suddenly Pippin screams "Ow!"
"Sorry!" Boromir exclaims, but the hobbits won't have it. "Get him Merry!" Pippin yells, as they both attack him.
Laina starts laughing. "Boromir's being beaten up by two hobbits!" she giggles.
Legolas jumps up on a rock and looks off in the distance.
"What's that?" Boromir asks, standing up.
"Just some clouds," Gimli says carelessly.
"It's moving fast, and against the wind." Boromir responds.
"No it's not." Laina states flatly. "The wind is blowing Legolas' hair in the same direction that they're travelling. See that? His hair is blowing behind him and the birds are coming towards him. D'you see that? Towards him. They're moving in the same direction. Jeez, what a bunch of ingnoramuses."
"Crebain from Dunland!" Legolas yells before anyone has a chance to respond to Laina. They all run to hide.
As Aragorn runs and hides under some bushes, he is startled by Molly.
"Hi!" she chirps happily.
He covers her mouth with his hand and hisses at her to shut up. As soon as the crebain are gone, he drags her out with him.
"Molly!" Laina squeals, and runs to hug her friend.
"Ahem." They look up to see everyone staring at them.
"We have to go over the pass of Caradhras. It's bad enough that you're coming with us, but she definitely can't." Gandalf tells them.
"Aw, come on!" Laina pleads, but Gandalf stays stubborn.
"No!"
"All right." Laina pouts.
"Oh! Just a second!" Molly shrieks. She runs over to Aragorn and hugs him so tightly he can hardly breath. Then, with a sudden burst of confidence, she jumps up and kisses him before disappearing. Laina is rolling on the ground she is laughing so hard.
Aragorn has a shocked look on his face. "What just happened?" he asks, still slightly bewildered as to the events that had just rapidly occurred.
"It's better to not ask questions." Boromir tells him.
Soon the company are walking up the mountains. Gandalf is walking in front, followed closely by Sam. Merry and Pippin are behind him with Laina. Legolas and Gimli walk behind them followed by Boromir and Frodo. Aragorn straggles behind. Suddenly Frodo slips and falls.
"A sliding we will go ! A sliding we will go! Hi-ho the dairy-o a sliding we will go! Hey Boromir, can we use you shield thing to go sliding?" Laina asks.
"Yeah!" Merry and Pippin agree.
"No!" Boromir yells.
"Fine." Merry and Pippin all sulk.
"Well, what else are you going to use it for?" Laina asks. "Oh! Maybe it's a sombrero!"
Right then, Frodo realises that he doesn't have the ring. Boromir reaches for it.
"Nooo!" Laina yells, running in slow motion to stop him. She picks up speed on the slippery snow, tries to stop herself, fails, and starts sliding down the mountain on her butt. Luckily, before she gets too far, she slams into Boromir.
"Ow!" he says, glaring at her. He stares at the ring, mesmerised.
"Boromir," Aragorn starts.
"Tis so odd that we should suffer such a fate over so small a thing." Boromir says.
"Yeah, yeah, we all now you have a fetish for shiny things." Laina tells him. "Get over it and give the ring back to Frodo."
Boromir snaps out of it. "Here you go little one." he says, handing the ring back to Frodo.
"And stop calling him little one!" Laina yells as they continue on. He's 10 years older than you!" She hauls herself off the ground, then slips and falls again, covering herself in snow.
Aragorn laughs and helps her up.
"Oh shut up. I'm not some fancy elf who can walk on snow." she yells the last bit, although she knows Legolas can probably already hear her. "So sue me."
As the Fellowship gets further up the mountain, it starts to get more frigid.
"I'm cold!" Laina complains. "I want to go to Hawaii. Hey, wait a minute...I can do whatever I want." she snaps her fingers and disappears. Everyone else hardly even notices.
About half an hour later she comes back. Aragorn and Boromir are both holding two hobbits, and they're in the midst of a snowstorm.
"Man, I love Haw-ahh! It's so cold!!" she screams in the middle of her sentence. Laina never was one for thinking ahead, so she's still in her bathing suit-a red Hawaiian print triangle top bikini with trunk bottoms. "J-j-just a s-s-second." she shivers.
She disappears and returns a minute or so later. Now she's wearing heavy pants lined with fleece and a huge navy blue parka, with faux fur around the hood that's pulled up. She also has on white fluffy mittens.
"Hey, didn't anybody notice that Bill the Pony has disappeared?" she demands. "I'm calling the SPCA. I think this qualifies as abuse. "There is a fell voice in the air," Legolas says, walking over the snow past them.
"Damn prancy elves who can walk on snow..." Laina mutters under her breath, trudging through the snow.
He stops and looks at her. "Pardon me?"
"Nothing." she says innocently, although she knows perfectly well he heard her.
"There is a fell voice on the air," Legolas tells them again.
"No shit, Sherlock," Laina mutters.
"It's Saruman!" Gandalf yells, as snow chunks fall from above.
"He's trying to bring down the mountain!" Aragorn yells.
"Really? I thought he was trying to help us," Laina says with a sarcastic tone.
"Gandalf we must turn back."
"No!" Gandalf yells and tries to counter the curse. Before he can, a lightning bolt hits the snow above and causes an avalanche from above. Legolas pulls Gandalf back just in time.
"Yay Leggy! You saved Gandalf!" Laina screams, as the company is buried in snow. Slowly they dig themselves out.
"We have to get off the mountain! Let's go over the Gap of Rohan and take the west road to my city!" Boromir yells over the wind.
"No, the Gap of Rohan takes us too close to Isenguard!" Aragorn yells back.
"Isenguard Shmisenguard," Laina mutters under her breath. "If we cannot go over the mountain, let us pass through it. Let us go through the Mines of Moria," Gimli suggests.
Laina bursts out laughing. "Oh my god, you look like such a dumbass when you say that," she giggles.
"Let the ringbearer decide," Gandalf tells them.
"No pressure Frodo," Laina adds.
"The mines." Frodo decides after a few minutes of careful consideration.
"God dammit!" Laina yells, to nobody in particular.
Disclaimers: I own half of Middle Earth! Really, I do! I don't own the books or movies, or actors, or rights to anything, but I own half of ME! My friend and I got bored one day and divided it up. Oh, and of course I own Laina (me)
Flames will be used to make hot chocolate!
Chapter 6: The Quest Begins (dun dun duuuuun)
The Fellowship (plus Laina) are walking along.
"Does anybody else hear that music?" Laina asks.
They all look at her as though she's insane. Which, of course, she is.
"No really, there's this really pretty music. It's like doo doo doooo do...oh never mind."
They reach the crest of a hill and the music that Laina hears heightens intensity. Suddenly she belts out the tune to Phantom of the Opera. The others stop and turn to look at her. (a/n: I always think that the Phantom music is going to play there. It just seems to fit.)
"What?" she responds to their odd stares.
Eventually they stop on a rocky hill with ruins to rest. Sam cooks while Frodo and Aragorn watches Boromir try to teach Merry and Pippin how to use a sword.
***15 minutes before the Fellowship arrived***
"Buahahaha!" Molly giggles. (See chapter four)
She runs and hides where Aragorn will hide in a little bit, giggling to herself.
***Back to where we were***
"That's it, move your feet," Aragorn tells the hobbits while Merry and Pippin compliment each other on their 'excellent' swordsmanship constantly.
A few feet away, Gimli starts in with Gandalf. "If anyone were to ask my opinion, which I note they're not-"
"Because you're a dwarf, and nobody CARES what the hell you think." Laina tells him.
Gimli starts to get very angry, but Gandalf stops him and gets him to continue. "I note we're taking the long way round. Gandalf, we could go through the mines of Moria." Gimli tells him.
"No way." Laina insists, stomping her foot.
"I have to agree with her." Gandalf says. "I would only go through the mines if there were no other choice."
Laina spits in Gimli's face. "Ha!"
Suddenly Pippin screams "Ow!"
"Sorry!" Boromir exclaims, but the hobbits won't have it. "Get him Merry!" Pippin yells, as they both attack him.
Laina starts laughing. "Boromir's being beaten up by two hobbits!" she giggles.
Legolas jumps up on a rock and looks off in the distance.
"What's that?" Boromir asks, standing up.
"Just some clouds," Gimli says carelessly.
"It's moving fast, and against the wind." Boromir responds.
"No it's not." Laina states flatly. "The wind is blowing Legolas' hair in the same direction that they're travelling. See that? His hair is blowing behind him and the birds are coming towards him. D'you see that? Towards him. They're moving in the same direction. Jeez, what a bunch of ingnoramuses."
"Crebain from Dunland!" Legolas yells before anyone has a chance to respond to Laina. They all run to hide.
As Aragorn runs and hides under some bushes, he is startled by Molly.
"Hi!" she chirps happily.
He covers her mouth with his hand and hisses at her to shut up. As soon as the crebain are gone, he drags her out with him.
"Molly!" Laina squeals, and runs to hug her friend.
"Ahem." They look up to see everyone staring at them.
"We have to go over the pass of Caradhras. It's bad enough that you're coming with us, but she definitely can't." Gandalf tells them.
"Aw, come on!" Laina pleads, but Gandalf stays stubborn.
"No!"
"All right." Laina pouts.
"Oh! Just a second!" Molly shrieks. She runs over to Aragorn and hugs him so tightly he can hardly breath. Then, with a sudden burst of confidence, she jumps up and kisses him before disappearing. Laina is rolling on the ground she is laughing so hard.
Aragorn has a shocked look on his face. "What just happened?" he asks, still slightly bewildered as to the events that had just rapidly occurred.
"It's better to not ask questions." Boromir tells him.
Soon the company are walking up the mountains. Gandalf is walking in front, followed closely by Sam. Merry and Pippin are behind him with Laina. Legolas and Gimli walk behind them followed by Boromir and Frodo. Aragorn straggles behind. Suddenly Frodo slips and falls.
"A sliding we will go ! A sliding we will go! Hi-ho the dairy-o a sliding we will go! Hey Boromir, can we use you shield thing to go sliding?" Laina asks.
"Yeah!" Merry and Pippin agree.
"No!" Boromir yells.
"Fine." Merry and Pippin all sulk.
"Well, what else are you going to use it for?" Laina asks. "Oh! Maybe it's a sombrero!"
Right then, Frodo realises that he doesn't have the ring. Boromir reaches for it.
"Nooo!" Laina yells, running in slow motion to stop him. She picks up speed on the slippery snow, tries to stop herself, fails, and starts sliding down the mountain on her butt. Luckily, before she gets too far, she slams into Boromir.
"Ow!" he says, glaring at her. He stares at the ring, mesmerised.
"Boromir," Aragorn starts.
"Tis so odd that we should suffer such a fate over so small a thing." Boromir says.
"Yeah, yeah, we all now you have a fetish for shiny things." Laina tells him. "Get over it and give the ring back to Frodo."
Boromir snaps out of it. "Here you go little one." he says, handing the ring back to Frodo.
"And stop calling him little one!" Laina yells as they continue on. He's 10 years older than you!" She hauls herself off the ground, then slips and falls again, covering herself in snow.
Aragorn laughs and helps her up.
"Oh shut up. I'm not some fancy elf who can walk on snow." she yells the last bit, although she knows Legolas can probably already hear her. "So sue me."
As the Fellowship gets further up the mountain, it starts to get more frigid.
"I'm cold!" Laina complains. "I want to go to Hawaii. Hey, wait a minute...I can do whatever I want." she snaps her fingers and disappears. Everyone else hardly even notices.
About half an hour later she comes back. Aragorn and Boromir are both holding two hobbits, and they're in the midst of a snowstorm.
"Man, I love Haw-ahh! It's so cold!!" she screams in the middle of her sentence. Laina never was one for thinking ahead, so she's still in her bathing suit-a red Hawaiian print triangle top bikini with trunk bottoms. "J-j-just a s-s-second." she shivers.
She disappears and returns a minute or so later. Now she's wearing heavy pants lined with fleece and a huge navy blue parka, with faux fur around the hood that's pulled up. She also has on white fluffy mittens.
"Hey, didn't anybody notice that Bill the Pony has disappeared?" she demands. "I'm calling the SPCA. I think this qualifies as abuse. "There is a fell voice in the air," Legolas says, walking over the snow past them.
"Damn prancy elves who can walk on snow..." Laina mutters under her breath, trudging through the snow.
He stops and looks at her. "Pardon me?"
"Nothing." she says innocently, although she knows perfectly well he heard her.
"There is a fell voice on the air," Legolas tells them again.
"No shit, Sherlock," Laina mutters.
"It's Saruman!" Gandalf yells, as snow chunks fall from above.
"He's trying to bring down the mountain!" Aragorn yells.
"Really? I thought he was trying to help us," Laina says with a sarcastic tone.
"Gandalf we must turn back."
"No!" Gandalf yells and tries to counter the curse. Before he can, a lightning bolt hits the snow above and causes an avalanche from above. Legolas pulls Gandalf back just in time.
"Yay Leggy! You saved Gandalf!" Laina screams, as the company is buried in snow. Slowly they dig themselves out.
"We have to get off the mountain! Let's go over the Gap of Rohan and take the west road to my city!" Boromir yells over the wind.
"No, the Gap of Rohan takes us too close to Isenguard!" Aragorn yells back.
"Isenguard Shmisenguard," Laina mutters under her breath. "If we cannot go over the mountain, let us pass through it. Let us go through the Mines of Moria," Gimli suggests.
Laina bursts out laughing. "Oh my god, you look like such a dumbass when you say that," she giggles.
"Let the ringbearer decide," Gandalf tells them.
"No pressure Frodo," Laina adds.
"The mines." Frodo decides after a few minutes of careful consideration.
"God dammit!" Laina yells, to nobody in particular.