They said the love is forbidden, that it was not allowed then why is it that every time there is a rule a to be broken someone breaks it? The abused wife killed her husband, they said it was self defensive but they still sent her to jail for the rest of her life and sent her 2 children to live god knows where with god know who. The mother has no idea, just take her children away and that is penalty enough. But even still something so simple and complicated such as love is so forbidden in one person's life but embraced in another. There is a code that some people live by; something so simple yet complicated by manners of the heart. He is told love is forbidden, that it leads to hurt and suffering and yet I, a simple person from a simple back world planet, is told to embrace it. We met when still very young. I was 14 and he was 10. Back then I did not see it, but he did. He asked me if I was an angel and I dismissed it as childhood fantasy when I was still a child. Why is it that the heart makes most simple things to tragic and hard? If he where not a Jedi we would never had met, never talked, never fallen in to this forbidden love. At the same time I would not have met my soul mate and he would not have met me. I would not have been called an angel by someone so young and innocent that I could believe it. When we met again some 10 years down the road all the things I had dreamed about came true. I saw him again and even if I denied it, I was falling in love. The attempt on my life proved that when he looked in my eyes there was so much emotion that came from other places then just being my guard. It saw it and felt it when the danger to me became too strong to ignore, I am strong and wanted to stay but did I want to stay because I was strong or because I was afraid? Looking back now I think it was because I was afraid, afraid of falling in love with my Jedi protector. The kid from a world even more back water then mine, he called me an angel. I think he knew why I did not want to go the real reason. But he did not push and that's all that matters. I saw in him the same thing I saw in me, love, scared, unsure but determined. That first kiss no matter how short, no matter how unsure spoke more then words could ever hope to. In the arena before our deaths that kiss was a goodbye that was left unfulfilled thankfully. Then came the wedding. So forbidden, so not wanted by those higher then us, but so very wanted by us. It might be crazy that we got married after such a short time together but we where together longer then most realize. There was not a day that went by in those 10 years that I did not think of him and him of me. Crazy as that might sound it is true. And now as I sit here holding our little girl, thinking of him and what he has became as well as the son that the true friend took who knows where I realize the one thing I was most afraid of: being alone but not really alone. Surrounded by people telling me this is why I did not want to marry him, have his children but I saw how the choice hurt him, the scars and the lost love that I know will hunt him for the rest of his life as it will hunt me. I don't have long now even though I am still young, the loss has hit me hard and I feel that my daughter will not get to know me as well as she should. For I am that abused wife sent to live in agony of the lost son, the lost love of my life as well as all those that I trusted and those that kept me safe. This is my jail, my agony my greatest fear.

((((A.N. I know you know who I am talking about so I will not tell you. This is my first star wars fic, I think, and it was suppose to be short but that did not happen, hope you like it. I do not own them however Canada does own cutiepie Hayden Christensen! Peace love and lollipops, trance)))