Jennifer's notes: If I wasn't such a bum this would've been up long ago anyhow, June brings my holidays and Chord's school term we'll see how things work out. Chord pointed out that only Jesus' birthday coincides our school terms praise the Lord! Sorry the chapter is short, by the way.

Chord's notes: Short works short works, especially since we didn't want to drag this out for longer than it had to be. Please review, tell us what you think! Explanations are coming, and we're doing our best, we promise! Oh, and for clarifications, the first set of italics is a flashback. Many thanks to Blake for pointing out that we needed some transition from the last chapter to the next! It'll make sense in the end, trust us.

Disclaimer: We are Matrix fanatics, not the owners themselves. We wish were were, but that's not happening. Argh.






Three Shades of Sky
Chapter Four



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You almost died, man. Tank's words.

The flatline didn't sound, did it?

Curse just stares at him with an awestruck look, a mixture of fear, gratitude and confusion. Her hands are shaking and her breath comes in rapid, shallow gasps for air; she'd run down from the cockpit in tears, only to find Neo sitting up slowly in his chair.

but the switch, I turned the switch, it was my fault—

—as was mine, if you call it that. I knocked your arm aside and we both hit the EMP at around the same time, Shadow says softly, clapping Curse on the back, do not complain that we were a second too late.

The medic, after giving Neo a quick, standard-duty once-over, disappears from the Core, just as Morpheus appears from the ladder. He spots Neo and looks to be realising a sigh of relief, one that he conceals rather well. You're okay, Neo.

I know it. Neo sounds like he means it, too.

He gets up from the chair and the clunking of his boots fades away as he heads for our cabin. For the first time, I notice the light shuddering of my shoulders, how my mouth has gone completely dry. My fingers are curled into my palm, digging into the pale skin, creating shallow creases.



He's okay. Tank is the only one left. I hadn't noticed Morpheus leave, he's fine, Trinity. You heard Shadow, they messed up the EMP and it came on a nanosecond late



Tank smiled. I never thought I'd be glad to have two rookies on the ship who cross each other out.

I guess you're right. I lick my lips. The inside of my mouth is too warm, not really dry but not moist, sticky.

You gonna go to him?

My eyes dart around the room.



your shift now, isn't it?



Take a break.

Tank doesn't need telling twice. Okay, and Trinity, relax. Your man's fine.

Tank heads for the mess hall, and I remain standing in front of the bank of monitors, staring disbelievingly at the screens. Scrolling codes of green. The Matrix. The nightmare, the screwed-up stimulation, almost took his life for the second time. Hell if I'm going to act all fine about that.

It's going to be a long war. One that started much too long ago

~*~

Curse was crying by the time she reached the mess hall, half-heartedly shoving the screeching door shut. She dropped to her knees and disappeared below a table. Muffled sobbing could be heard.

"You know, when people want to cry, they usually opt for the engine room. That gives them a lesser chance of being discovered."

A soft thump was heard, followed by quick scuffling noises and a yelp. Curse's head reappeared from under the table, but the rest of her body remained hidden. She rubbed her head resentfully. Trinity looked down at her from where she'd been standing at the far end of the mess hall, at an angle to the side of the door that Curse couldn't have seen when she'd rushed in. The girl said as much.

"I didn't see you..."

"Don't worry about it. Tears don't make for very good eyesight."

Trinity watched Curse nod and sniffle from under the table. Blue eyes wandered curiously over the red eyes, red nose and red cheeks, before the second-in-command took a seat next to the redhead on the floor. She looked like the top of a traffic light.

"What's bothering you?" said Trinity tentatively after a period of uncomfortable silence. Curse shook her head.

You don't need to do this, you know I'll be okay. Trinity met her with such a level gaze that Curse had to look away, laughing shakily. I don't suppose you get this with too many rookies?

Get what?

Curse wiped her eyes furiously. You know why my name's Curse? Because that's what everyone says I am.

Cross-legged, Trinity ducked her head slightly to avoid bumping it against the table's underside. She turned to study the redhead. No wonder she was having so much trouble. It was all about self-esteem. To put it plainly, Curse had none. Or next to none, anyway.

Curse, you're not a failure-

Curse curled up. So now I'm a failure too.

No, you are not. You're perfectly-

-capable of reaching a higher potential, no, I am not. She stopped for a while, choking. You shouldn't have unplugged me. I'm useless.

Trinity sighed. Curse, we unplug people for many more reasons. It's not totally based on merit. It doesn't have everything to do with freeing the mind.

Curse laughed bitterly. That wasn't exactly my first impression. She stopped suddenly, aghast. I don't know what's come over me. I shouldn't have said that

We all have to say what we feel now and then. You don't have to apologise for everything.

Curse laughed a bit, but this time, there was genuine warmth in her smile. You know who you sound like? She didn't wait for a reply. You sound like my mum. She went quiet. I miss her a lot.

Trinity's brow furrowed. I don't mean to be rude, but you were living alone.

She died four years before I ever touched a computer. Curse smiled sadly. Hey Trinity, you miss anything from the matrix?

We're not supposed to talk about- She stopped. She thought for a while. What did she miss? It'd been so long I guess I miss my home I lived there all my life. There was a park with a red slide two blocks down the road then around the corner

There was an ice-cream parlour! Curse exclaimed. My gosh. I lived across the road

I don't suppose it's against the rules to admit that we all miss matrix food. Every now and then you'll see a soldier with pizza.

Curse grinned sheepishly. So you're human after all... that's good to know.

What do you mean? Trinity frowned slightly. Curse laughed nervously.

It's just looking at Neo Trinity relaxed.

Neo is special. Her eyes glowed, and her tone softened considerably. Curse fought the blush rising to her cheeks and the enormous grin threatening to take over her face. Listen, if it helps, I could go through some of your training with you. Fighting alongside Neo is enough to make anyone most of them, anyway, feel inferior.

whispered Curse awkwardly, getting up from the floor just as awkwardly, narrowly missing hitting her head on the table again. Her left foot had gone completely numb. About Neo-



is he Curse struggled for the right word,



never mind. Smiling, Curse scampered out of the mess hall, leaving Trinity alone to wonder. Critical? Neo?

She had to go see him.



~*~



Trinity knocked twice on the door, not as softly as she'd have under different circumstances. She tried calling Neo's name - he was definitely in there - but there was no answer. One hand was all it took to push the door open.

Neo was there, sure enough, sitting on the bunk bed with his back to her. She shut the door.

What was that about?

He looked up, then. What was what about?

Trinity nodded towards the door. What did you do? To Curse. She's crying.

She is? Neo said, rather incredulously. Trinity was fairly sure she didn't like his tone.

"She was. She mentioned your name, and I want to know what that was all about. She folded her arms across her chest. What's going on, Neo? Curse has been acting... strange, around you lately.

Trinity watched his gaze fall to their bunk's mattress. He wouldn't look at her. Come to think of it, ever since that incident with the experiment, the day the sentinels almost the close brush with danger that almost resulted in no. Trinity did not want to think about it. She refused to think about it, preferred to leave it in the past. Everything was fine, after all, Neo got out and everything was back to normal. Or was it.

She watched him shuffle in his seat, waiting for his response. There was no denying it, however. He had changed.

"What do you mean, strange?"

"I want answers, Neo, not questions." Trinity studied the way he tensed up, as if bracing himself against something. "What is it you aren't telling me?"

"What would I hide from you?"

"Nothing." 'What you're hiding from me right now,' didn't sound appropriate to Trinity. Neither did 'I told you I wanted answers, not questions.'

Out of the blue, Neo snapped. Damn it, Trinity, I'm not hiding anything from you!

It wasn't his way to snap, but it was even more uncharacteristic of her to snap back. Trinity settled for raising an eyebrow and waited for him to continue. His shoulders slumped. Look, I just told her to take the jump program. She's too scared of it to get anywhere...

...you told her to take the jump program? You told her to jump? Told- Trinity couldn't help herself, or forced?

Neo sighed. He released a sharp huff of resentment. Honestly, Trinity. And that girl's such a crybaby.

Trinity stared down piercingly at him. Excuse me? she said coldly.

"We didn't," Neo began, and Trinity found it hard to believe the words that followed were coming from him, "have this sort of problem with the others."

"That's something, coming from someone who agreed to have her use the smaller jump program." Trinity held up one hand against Neo's protests. Self-defense? What was going on here? "I don't disapprove, but I just thought you'd like to know that this... this doesn't make sense."

At that point, the only appropriate course of action would have been to walk out of the cabin without another word. Trinity did so, but not without a second, contemplative glance.

Neo?



~*~



It was dinnertime.

We have tables and chairs too, y'know, grumbled Tank. Shadow swung her legs gaily, left foot locked behind her right ankle. Swallowing, she smirked at Tank.

Too many people onboard my old ship. Not enough space, so I sat on the floor. I am somewhat used to it. She shrugged. Over the past few days, she'd finally started opening up to the rest of the crew, going from monosyllabic to speaking in short sentences. She used the phrase my old ship' about ten times a day. On the upper side, she seemed to be fitting in fairly well, though so far her medical skills had not been put to the test. Considering she was the most easily spared medic of her old ship, this was not entirely comforting.

It's just that your knees happen to be at my eye level, where my bowl should be. Tank mashed a lump in his goo.

The counter is better than the floor. Not as cold.

Curse laughed unexpectedly hard at this point, and the entire table – and counter – turned
to stare at her. She fiercely bent her head over her bowl again, right elbow nearly knocking Morpheus' bowl clear off the table. Hastily he placed his tin mug next to Shadow on the counter. Directly across him, his second-in-command was silently stirring her food around.

Trinity, you've been awfully quiet, commented Tank. The space between Trinity and himself was pointedly empty.

Frowning slightly, Morpheus enquired, Trinity, where's Neo?

In his cabin. Trinity's expression never wavered.

It was then that the door scraped open, Neo framed in the doorway.

You're late, said Morpheus. Neo shrugged indifferently, walking towards the counter without closing the door. Morpheus started again, Where were you?

Trinity frowned slightly. Morpheus had never questioned the whereabouts of his crew unless he needed them to be in specific locations, believing it to be their own privacy. This was the second time in the same exchange that he had. Not to mention the fact that he had actually doubted what she'd said (or, rather, what she'd made up), which was usually unheard of. Captains trusted their second-in-commands completely; that was how it had to be if the entire crew was to survive the war. She held her breath.

The core.

Sunk.

Morpheus cast a sidelong look at Trinity, one that she and she alone could appropriately read; she didn't like what she saw. What were you doing there?

Neo got himself a bowl and filled it. None of your business.

Silence.

Tentatively, Tank spoke up, Hey, Neo, don'cha think it's the Captain's business when we're dealing with his hunk of metal? He laughed nervously. Trinity gave Morpheus a stare for stare, narrowing her eyes.

Morpheus understood what she was about to do and attempted to head her off, Trinity, I think it would be...

Neo. When the captain asks you a question, you answer it. That goes for all officers of a higher rank. Trinity glared at Neo. Do I make myself clear?

Her eyes followed him around the room, as he deliberately went around the table. Neo set his bowl down so forcefully that his gruel slopped out of the bowl and splattered the table. He ignored it. Trinity ignored it and would not take her gaze off him.

Neo sat down on Curse's left, as far from Trinity as possible. Tank, directly opposite him, raised his eyebrows so high they were in the danger of flying off his forehead but said nothing. Trinity glared at Neo, venom in her gaze. Alright then, she said coolly, answer the captain.

I don't want to. Tank allowed himself a rather low whistle and Curse began to inch down the bench, away from the offending Neo.

Never mind, Trinity, Morpheus cut in quietly. I would rather you use your tongue for eating now rather than sniping. Trinity unenthusiastically lifted her spork again.

A while later, Morpheus turned to Curse. Curse. How is your training coming along?

Curse grinned happily, glad that the tension at the table was easing. Trinity's helping me out, gonna be my sparring partner.

Tank blurted, I thought Neo was in charge of rookies?

He is in charge of me. Shadow calmly folded her arms, having set her empty bowl beside her on the counter. She smiled tightly. I am troublesome.

Trinity looked over at Neo, who hadn't reacted at all to Shadow's statement. Why was Shadow covering up for him? It was all too clear that Neo most certainly was not helping Shadow, and Shadow didn't even need assistance – it wasn't like she'd been unplugged yesterday. As a matter of fact, according to the skimpy facts they had wheedled out of her, it was apparent that she'd been free for quite a few years, maybe even longer than Trinity.

How is the jump program? Curse went rigid. It was obviously still a sore spot.

muttered Tank, still can't get the thing?

Curse is afraid of heights, Trinity pronounced clearly.

said Morpheus. Curse looked down at her dinner, wondering if the food was just an excuse to discuss all the day's nasty happenings.

Tank grinned, listen, it's okay.

Tank gets nervous jumping over cracks in the floor, put in Trinity.

Tank laughed loudly. Yeah, that's right, I do.

Actually, I think Curse jumps like shit. Everyone jumped. They'd almost forgotten Neo was there, but he was. He looked uninterested, bored, sitting there playing with his spork.

Even Morpheus looked up. What do you mean by that?

No wait, I take that back. I think shit can jump better than that.

Trinity's spork missed her untouched meal and skittered across the table as she stood up. You will stop this.

Neo bristled. Stop what, exactly?

Stop this. You, ragging on Curse. You're being far too hard on her, when she's trying as hard as she can-

In that case, her hard as she can' is pitiful. I shudder to think what her best' would be like. Oh, and Miss Second-In-Command, just a thought, sneered Neo. but you could do without pulling rank on everyone, just because-

Just because I happen to be the ranking officer, and that ought to say enough for everyone. Rank isn't merely a title to pull over your sorry ass whenever I feel like it, because Neo, sorry to disappoint you, but I don't do immature. I am an experienced fighter, a disciplined soldier, and you will listen to what I have to say without cutting it off, because your survival in the middle of this goddamned war might depend on it.

"Who the hell do you think you are? I'm the One. You can't fight this goddamned war without me.

The only sound to be heard after that was that of a spork dropping to the floor.



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