Hey everyone! I'm back again, school's out, and it's summer vacation. Aaaaannndddd I'm starting driver's ed. Woohoo. Okay. I want to take the time right now to thank all of my reviewers. I don't do it nearly enough. I have survived my finals and I did fairly well, too. All A's, though my World History grade was kinda close. One last thing: the song lyrics are from Painted Black by Vanessa Carlton. Now on with the show!
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Harry, Ron, and Hermione were taking advantage of their break by studying in the library. Harry and Ron were there under protest and took every possible chance to remind Hermione of this.
"Y'know who Professor Hiiragizawa reminds me of?" asked Ron suddenly, out of the blue.
"Who?" asked Harry, desperate for a distraction from his explanation of the common properties of mursorte and how it's used in the Multi-Colored Leaf potion. It's a weed, thought Harry irritably. It doesn't do anything. And who cares about such a stupid, worthless potion, anyway?
"Professor Dumbledore."
The three of them shuddered. One was quite enought, thank you.
Silence reigned for a time until-
"This is so boring," complained Ron, glaring alternately at his potions essay and Most Potente Potions.
Hermione ignored him and continued her research as if he wasn't there.
"How far have you gotten on your essay, Harry?" asked Ron morosely. "Harry?" he repeated when there was no reply and looked over at his friend. He was sleeping, face down in his book.
Ron nudged him and he promptly fell off his chair. "Oww," Harry moaned, crawling back into his seat.
"You fell asleep again," commented Hermione wryly.
"Sorry," moaned Harry, rubbing his eyes.
Hermione and Ron exchanged glances.
"Um...Harry," began Hermione slowly. "I'm your friend, so I'll say this as gently as possible. You-"
"Look like crap," interrupted Ron bluntly.
"Ron!" exclaimed Hermione before clapping her hand over her mouth, remembering that they were in the library.
"Well, it's true," said Ron. "Haven't you been getting any sleep? You're going to need it with O.W.L.s coming up."
"Yes, I have been sleeping. I think I've been sleeping more than usual lately and I feel as if I've been awake the whole time. The extra study period they gave me I've been using to sleep as well."
"After attempting to sneak out first," grinned Hermione.
Harry gave a rueful grin back. The first time he'd practically tripped over Kero. The second he'd bumped into Nakuru. That alone was enough to make him quit for a while and be more cautious in the future. The third time he'd been seen by both Kero and Meiling, though he didn't know how. He'd thought they were sufficiently distracted with their bickering. The fourth time he'd come across Meiling alone. When he'd been caught by both Spinel and Nakuru, that was sufficient enough to make him stay in the Gryffindor Tower for good.
They heard a crash outside in the hallway and the three hurried to the door and peered outside at the mess.
Snape was glowering down at a whimpering Neville who was sitting in a pool of liquid. For a heartstopping moment they thought it was blood, then noted with relief that it was too orangey and the glass that was scattered about, hinted at the shape of a bottle.
"Ten points from Gryffindor!" hissed Snape, bringing out his wand to clean up the mess. "Honestly, Mr. Longbottom, at least attempt to use some of your martial arts skills outside of the club and perhaps, just once, you can avoid killing something out of sheer clutziness!"
Neville scrambled to his feet and made his way over to the trio as the Potions Master stalked off.
Hermione strained her ears to hear him mutter, "Sakura won't be pleased." She puzzled over that cryptic comment as the boys tried to comfort Neville.
"How did Snape know?" asked Harry, puzzled.
"Know what?" asked Ron absently.
"That Neville is the best out of all of us at martial arts. He's advancing rapidly and both Professor Li's are impressed," replied Harry. "Snape wouldn't bother watching practice and I can't imagine him being even the least bit curious."
The four looked at each other and shrugged. Mysteries had been very easy to come by lately.
~*~
"My apologies, Sakura, but Neville managed to break the last bottle of my dreamless sleep potion and it will take me a few days to make a new batch. This is just a regular sleeping potion, unless you wish for the Drought of Living Death," added Severus in jest.
"I'm sure an ordinary sleeping potion will be just fine," replied Sakura with a forced laugh. It seemed to her that every smile, every laugh, every word, even, was fake, a lie. Her eyes were haunted with the visions she had seen. Until she had asked for a potion she had dreaded sleep and awoke as early as her visions allowed her. She thought she had hidden her inner torment even from her friends until she had overheard Syaoran and Tomoyo talking about her. Since then she had forced herself to act more cheerful than ever and as far as she knew, it worked.
"Thank you, Severus," said Sakura, taking the bottle and watched him walk away before shutting the door to her room. She glanced at the clock on her way in and saw that it was almost midnight. Almost everyone would be sleeping but for Severus, Minerva, and Filch, who were patrolling the halls.
With a sigh she threw her head back and drank before putting the empty bottle on the desk and crawling into bed.
None of the teachers had been happy about the news of the pending war and some at the regular teacher's meeting had outright protested that the students and staff would be staying at Hogwarts during the fighting that was to take place outside their doors. Albus had sent for Remus Lupin and Sirius Black and thankfully no mention of the group's true identities had been needed. The nine of them were the wizards' secret weapon, though most didn't know it.
These thoughts receded to the back of her mind as the now-familiar dizzying sensation took place and she was shoved into sleep by the potion.
~*~
I see a red door and I want it painted black
No colors anymore, I want them to turn black
Sakura walked through the dark empty corridors of the school. Her feet were bare and she seemed not to notice the cold, dressed in her pajamas. She didn't know where she was going. She wasn't even aware she was awake. Behind her the dark walls, doors, floor, everything, became black. Sakura was not aware she had sunk into a deep depression. She wasn't aware of anything but her vision, her curse, her nightmare.
I see the girls walk by dressed in their summer clothes
I have to turn my head until my darkness goes
I see a line of cars and they are painted black
With flowers and my love both never to come back
Sakura's eyes were open wide and unseeing, or perhaps seeing something beyond the physical reality of the building. Her feet seemed not to touch the floor and she neither stumbled nor fell.
"Don't break, don't let the glass break," she chanted over and over again under her breath.
Her aura flared wildly, but all who could sense it were asleep, faces troubled, but none stirred, though Syaoran would usually have been the first awake and ready with the rest of the group right behind him.
Sakura was surrounded in darkness, alone, and with every step she took, that area reflected her thoughts and feelings and turned black, as if painted with darkness.
I see people turn their heads and quickly look away
Like a new born baby it just happens every day
I look inside myself and see my heart is black
I see my red door and it's heading into black
Tears trickled down her cheeks and she sobbed, leaning against a wall.
It immediately turned so dark a black that the individual stones could barely be seen.
Sakura almost woke up at that moment, but her vision and the sleep potion dragged her back into unconsciousness.
"Am I selfish?" asked Sakura brokenly, her voice seeming to come from far away as she stared down at the broken fragments in her dream. "Am I truly crying for all of the deaths of this battle and for what everyone will do after the glass breaks, or am I crying because of the broken glass alone? Am I that selfish? Am I so..." she let out a choked sob. "...Black?"
Her body continued down the hall as her mind ran through the questions. She was trapped in her vision.
Maybe then I'll fade away and not have to face the facts
It's not easy facing up when your whole world is black
She came to a full-length mirror in the hallway and faced it. She was the only color reflected back and in some corner of her mind she realized that, saw it, and took no notice.
Gently Sakura reached out to touch the smooth surface. Immediately it clouded over and the image was darkened, tinted.
She shrieked, screaming anger and pain,fear and sorrow. In their beds, those sleeping broke out in a cold sweat, sleep disturbed by an image of blood and fighting, the sound of dying men and women screaming or moaning, the coppery smell of blood. They stirred, but did not awaken, and then the nightmare was replaced and forgotten.
I wanna see it painted painted, painted black, oh baby
I wanna see it painted painted, painted black, oh baby
Sakura's eyes abruptly focused as she jerked awake.
Where am I?
Half blinded by tears and fear of the dark, she stumbled through the closest door, slamming it shut behind her, not even noticing it was the teacher's lounge.
Severus jerked his head up, startled. His wand was halfway throught the motion of a spell when he realized who it was.
"Sakura?" he asked.
Suddenly blackness spread out from her and covered the room, dimming the lights until they were practically useless and he heard Sakura sobbing harshly.
"Minerva!" he bellowed. She had left just moments before out the side door, so would not have seen Sakura coming. Oh, why was this happening to him now? He was no good with crying females. Or any females for that matter. Or anyone, actually.
"Lumos!" he muttered. His wand flickered and almost died, like a candle, as Minerva burst through the door.
"Lumos, lumos, lumos! Dammit, work!" he snarled in frustration as his wand flickered. It wasn't supposed to do that.
"What is going on?" demanded Minerva.
"Light," choked out Sakura, and the card lit up the room, shining off her tear-streaked face.
The two professors frowned at the walls.
"Is it paint?" murmured Severus, prodding the wall with his wand.
Without warning Sakura burst into tears again and Professor McGonagall rushed over, holding the girl close to her as the Potions Master hovered awkwardly around them.
"Sh. It's all right, dear. Don't worry," murmured the woman over and over again.
No more will my green see go turn a deeper blue
I could not foresee this thing happening to you
He had missed the signs, they all had. Sakura had seemed as overly happy and cheerful as ever. It was as she had told Severus before.
"I smell water, a storm."
"What does it smell like?" he had replied, curious.
"...Unusual."
"How so?"
"It smells like a storm of tears."
"...."
"Be careful. Watch out for those you care for."
"Like who?"
"Well, how about Hermione? She's pretty. And intelligent too," she had said with a grin, lightening up the grim mood.
"What do you take me for?! A pedophile?!"
She had been hiding her anguish, he could see that now. He had no idea such a thing could happen to her. Sakura had been right about a storm of tears. Even so, he had a feeling that the storm had not yet come to pass, that she had not been talking about herself at all.
He grimaced. Crying females. He just couldn't understand them.
If I look hard enough into the setting sun
My love will laugh with me before the morning comes
Sakura was murmuring something so that Minerva leaned closer to hear, even as she rocked her back and forth.
"I'm so selfish, so black-hearted, how can I feel like this, so selfish," Sakura was mumbling.
"No, no," whispered Minerva. "Oh, no. You're one of the most unselfish and kind person I've ever met. What's wrong, Sakura? Let us help you."
Eventually Sakura's tears slowed and then finally stopped. She rested there a moment before leaving the security of the warm embrace.
"I'm fine," she said as she stood. "It was just...just a nightmare." She glanced around. "My aura must have projected my mood while I was sleepwalking," she explained as she spread her arms and concentrated on dissipating the black that had overtaken whatever she touched.
With a sigh, she lowered her arms. "I hope I didn't wake anyone," she said as she headed for the door.
Sakura paused. "Perhaps we should use the Drought of Living Death until the dreamless sleep potion is ready. And thank you," she said softly before exiting the room, leaving the two no chance to reply.
She leaned back against the door wearily and closed her eyes for a moment.
I wanna see it painted painted, painted black, oh
Black as night, black as coal
I wanna see the sun blotted out from the sky
Painted, painted, painted black oh baby
Painted painted, painted black