Title: Half of my soul and all of my heart
Author: ladydewinter
Email: ladydewinter@gmx.net
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: W/K first, but I don't really like them...so W/T eventually :-) And this is becoming B/S as well, it seems.
Setting: The story takes place roughly after The Killer in Me, so spoilers up to then. And if you have no idea about Season Three of Angel you'll be spoilt as well...so don't come running to me *lol*
Disclaimer: Willow, Tara, Kennedy, Anya et. al belong to Joss Whedon and ME and - hey you know whom they belong to. The story however is mine. Oh, the title is taken from a book called "Magic's Promise" by Mercedes Lackey. And there may be quotes from the show included in this story - I haven't really marked them, but if it sounds familiar - I mean it as an homage, I don't wanna violate any copyright, really. Please don't sue me!
Feedback: Yes please!!! I really appreciate it.
Distribution: If you want it, you can have it, just let me know where it ends up.
Summary: The challenge continued...
Author's note: As this one is pretty short, and the next as well, I thought I'd make it two updates today... you guys always deserve a treat :-)
*** I blew it, she thought to herself. I endured all of this, just to completely blow it in the end. Congratulations, Tara. It was still dark around her, but little by little it got lighter. "Close your eyes," she heard someone say. Was that Skip? "Okay, now you can open them." She looked around her. They were in the same room they had been in earlier, the one with the christmas lights. She was lying on the bed however. She didn't really know if she wanted to sit up. After all, she had failed. She wondered what was going to happen to her now. Would she just die? Or would she be punished? Skip - if it was Skip who was in the room with her - didn't say anything. She realized she would have to move.
Finally she couldn't stand it anymore and sat up. Yeah, it was Skip. He was sitting on a chair next to the door now, smiling friendly. "Congratulations, Tara."
"For what?" she asked. "I failed, didn't I?"
"No, you didn't. The - demonstration was already over when you -" he didn't know how to put it.
"Screamed," Tara finished the sentence for him.
"Well, yes. Anyway, you passed."
She didn't what to feel now. She passed - now what? After everything she had seen, she wasn't sure if she wanted to go anymore. It looked as if she would have to fight Willow - Willow who hadn't really been happy with her, it seemed. She decided to ask Skip. "Is - ur, Buffy said something that I would have to help save the world. Will I - will I have to stop Willow?"
"I'm sorry - I cannot tell you that."
"Why not?"
"I'm not allowed to tell you anything regarding what you saw. The challenge isn't over yet, you know."
"But you just said it-" Tara was confused.
"I said, the demonstration was over. Not the challenge."
"There's a difference? I thought the demonstration was the challenge?"
"Not quite." He smiled at her again.
She waited for him to continue. As he didn't say anything, she asked him, "So what is going to happen now? How do I finish it?"
He looked away. "No, I don't have to fight you after all, do I? Because I already explained to you I-"
"You don't have to fight me. It's not as easy as that."
Well, that didn't sound too good. "What is it then?" she was starting to get a bit impatient.
"I am going to ask you something now. I don't want you to answer right away - I'll leave you for an hour afterwards. Only then you have to make your choice. Alright?"
Tara nodded.
"Okay...now here it comes: Are you still sure you want to cross over? No, don't answer right away," he told her as he saw her open her mouth. "I want you really to be sure. If you go there, there's no way back - you can't just leave then. Not until it's all over, that is. Then everybody leaves. But you are to be there to prevent just that. Anyway, what I'm saying really is that if you go, you go there until you die. And I can't promise you that you'll be happy."
"W-What if I - what if I say no?" she asked.
"Then you'll die. You can't return to your old world, you have no anchor there."
"I see. So it's due or die, is it?"
"Yes."
"Okay. Um, so, I'll think about it now, right?"
"Yes. I'll be back in an hour. If you choose to make your decision sooner, just call me."
She only smiled at him in return. He opened the door and was about to leave, when he turned around again. "You are very brave," he told her once more. She looked away and heard the door close.
Tara sighed and got off the bed. She walked about the room for a while, trying not to think for a moment. That was impossible, however... all the images kept floating by... she wasn't able to push them back. Now she had to make a choice.
It wasn't as easy as it had been anymore. At the beginning it had seemed all she had to do was go to that other world and she would live together with Willow happily other. Then they told her she had to help stop the Apocalypse, and now this seemed to entail stopping Willow... maybe even killing Willow. At that thought she felt sick. She remembered watching Buffy fight Angel. I could never do that, she told herself. Never. I - what is this supposed to be? Why - why in the world would the Powers that Be separate Willow and me only to reunite us again to separate us again?
There were several answers to that question, she realized. One was that the demonstration was just a trick, that none of it had ever really happened. She couldn't believe that, however. It had all seemed too real. And that would explain why Buffy hadn't want to tell her about Willow... and why Willow hadn't - Tara remembered she had told Buffy to tell Willow she loved her... and there had obviously been no answer from Willow - maybe because she had become all apocalyptic. Or maybe - a thought even more horrible - maybe she didn't love her anymore. Maybe she was in love with this dark haired girl. Maybe she had already forgotten-
No, now she was being stupid. She remembered what Buffy had said at their first meeting - Willow wanted her to come back. And - and Buffy wanted her to come back, needed her. And Faith as well. She tried to forget the thought about possibly having to kill Willow. She wouldn't have to do that, she hoped.
So what was she to do? It would be so much easier just to choose death - although she had no idea what it would be like, she was positive it would be a lot more peaceful than crossing over. But peaceful didn't mean better, she decided. And Skip was right - she was brave, and strong... what had her Mom always told her? "You've got a world of strength in your heart." So the decision wasn't that hard.
"Skip," she called.
She blinked, and there he was, standing in front of the door. "You already made your choice?" he asked her.
"I did." He nodded.
"Do you want to cross over?" There was a pause.
"Yes."
He smiled, obviously pleased. "Wonderful. Now you really passed the challenge. Congratulations." With that, he stretched out his hand. Tara took is, and they shook hands. "It was an honour meeting you, Tara."
She blushed at hearing that. "Thank you. I-Is there anything else I need to know?"
"No, nothing you won't pick up along the way. I'm confident you'll be doing fine."
"So - what do I do now?"
"You? You don't have to do that much. I'll just open that door, and you walk through it. No fighting." He grinned.
"No fighting - that's really good." She stood there, waiting for him to step aside.
"Oh, I'm sorry." He took a few steps back and opened the door for her. "Good luck." Outside it was dark. But she wasn't afraid.
"Goodbye, Skip," Tara smiled at him. Then she crossed the doorstep and shut the door behind her.
***
Author: ladydewinter
Email: ladydewinter@gmx.net
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: W/K first, but I don't really like them...so W/T eventually :-) And this is becoming B/S as well, it seems.
Setting: The story takes place roughly after The Killer in Me, so spoilers up to then. And if you have no idea about Season Three of Angel you'll be spoilt as well...so don't come running to me *lol*
Disclaimer: Willow, Tara, Kennedy, Anya et. al belong to Joss Whedon and ME and - hey you know whom they belong to. The story however is mine. Oh, the title is taken from a book called "Magic's Promise" by Mercedes Lackey. And there may be quotes from the show included in this story - I haven't really marked them, but if it sounds familiar - I mean it as an homage, I don't wanna violate any copyright, really. Please don't sue me!
Feedback: Yes please!!! I really appreciate it.
Distribution: If you want it, you can have it, just let me know where it ends up.
Summary: The challenge continued...
Author's note: As this one is pretty short, and the next as well, I thought I'd make it two updates today... you guys always deserve a treat :-)
*** I blew it, she thought to herself. I endured all of this, just to completely blow it in the end. Congratulations, Tara. It was still dark around her, but little by little it got lighter. "Close your eyes," she heard someone say. Was that Skip? "Okay, now you can open them." She looked around her. They were in the same room they had been in earlier, the one with the christmas lights. She was lying on the bed however. She didn't really know if she wanted to sit up. After all, she had failed. She wondered what was going to happen to her now. Would she just die? Or would she be punished? Skip - if it was Skip who was in the room with her - didn't say anything. She realized she would have to move.
Finally she couldn't stand it anymore and sat up. Yeah, it was Skip. He was sitting on a chair next to the door now, smiling friendly. "Congratulations, Tara."
"For what?" she asked. "I failed, didn't I?"
"No, you didn't. The - demonstration was already over when you -" he didn't know how to put it.
"Screamed," Tara finished the sentence for him.
"Well, yes. Anyway, you passed."
She didn't what to feel now. She passed - now what? After everything she had seen, she wasn't sure if she wanted to go anymore. It looked as if she would have to fight Willow - Willow who hadn't really been happy with her, it seemed. She decided to ask Skip. "Is - ur, Buffy said something that I would have to help save the world. Will I - will I have to stop Willow?"
"I'm sorry - I cannot tell you that."
"Why not?"
"I'm not allowed to tell you anything regarding what you saw. The challenge isn't over yet, you know."
"But you just said it-" Tara was confused.
"I said, the demonstration was over. Not the challenge."
"There's a difference? I thought the demonstration was the challenge?"
"Not quite." He smiled at her again.
She waited for him to continue. As he didn't say anything, she asked him, "So what is going to happen now? How do I finish it?"
He looked away. "No, I don't have to fight you after all, do I? Because I already explained to you I-"
"You don't have to fight me. It's not as easy as that."
Well, that didn't sound too good. "What is it then?" she was starting to get a bit impatient.
"I am going to ask you something now. I don't want you to answer right away - I'll leave you for an hour afterwards. Only then you have to make your choice. Alright?"
Tara nodded.
"Okay...now here it comes: Are you still sure you want to cross over? No, don't answer right away," he told her as he saw her open her mouth. "I want you really to be sure. If you go there, there's no way back - you can't just leave then. Not until it's all over, that is. Then everybody leaves. But you are to be there to prevent just that. Anyway, what I'm saying really is that if you go, you go there until you die. And I can't promise you that you'll be happy."
"W-What if I - what if I say no?" she asked.
"Then you'll die. You can't return to your old world, you have no anchor there."
"I see. So it's due or die, is it?"
"Yes."
"Okay. Um, so, I'll think about it now, right?"
"Yes. I'll be back in an hour. If you choose to make your decision sooner, just call me."
She only smiled at him in return. He opened the door and was about to leave, when he turned around again. "You are very brave," he told her once more. She looked away and heard the door close.
Tara sighed and got off the bed. She walked about the room for a while, trying not to think for a moment. That was impossible, however... all the images kept floating by... she wasn't able to push them back. Now she had to make a choice.
It wasn't as easy as it had been anymore. At the beginning it had seemed all she had to do was go to that other world and she would live together with Willow happily other. Then they told her she had to help stop the Apocalypse, and now this seemed to entail stopping Willow... maybe even killing Willow. At that thought she felt sick. She remembered watching Buffy fight Angel. I could never do that, she told herself. Never. I - what is this supposed to be? Why - why in the world would the Powers that Be separate Willow and me only to reunite us again to separate us again?
There were several answers to that question, she realized. One was that the demonstration was just a trick, that none of it had ever really happened. She couldn't believe that, however. It had all seemed too real. And that would explain why Buffy hadn't want to tell her about Willow... and why Willow hadn't - Tara remembered she had told Buffy to tell Willow she loved her... and there had obviously been no answer from Willow - maybe because she had become all apocalyptic. Or maybe - a thought even more horrible - maybe she didn't love her anymore. Maybe she was in love with this dark haired girl. Maybe she had already forgotten-
No, now she was being stupid. She remembered what Buffy had said at their first meeting - Willow wanted her to come back. And - and Buffy wanted her to come back, needed her. And Faith as well. She tried to forget the thought about possibly having to kill Willow. She wouldn't have to do that, she hoped.
So what was she to do? It would be so much easier just to choose death - although she had no idea what it would be like, she was positive it would be a lot more peaceful than crossing over. But peaceful didn't mean better, she decided. And Skip was right - she was brave, and strong... what had her Mom always told her? "You've got a world of strength in your heart." So the decision wasn't that hard.
"Skip," she called.
She blinked, and there he was, standing in front of the door. "You already made your choice?" he asked her.
"I did." He nodded.
"Do you want to cross over?" There was a pause.
"Yes."
He smiled, obviously pleased. "Wonderful. Now you really passed the challenge. Congratulations." With that, he stretched out his hand. Tara took is, and they shook hands. "It was an honour meeting you, Tara."
She blushed at hearing that. "Thank you. I-Is there anything else I need to know?"
"No, nothing you won't pick up along the way. I'm confident you'll be doing fine."
"So - what do I do now?"
"You? You don't have to do that much. I'll just open that door, and you walk through it. No fighting." He grinned.
"No fighting - that's really good." She stood there, waiting for him to step aside.
"Oh, I'm sorry." He took a few steps back and opened the door for her. "Good luck." Outside it was dark. But she wasn't afraid.
"Goodbye, Skip," Tara smiled at him. Then she crossed the doorstep and shut the door behind her.
***