Title: Half of my soul and all of my heart
Author: ladydewinter
Email: ladydewinter@gmx.net
Rating: PG 13
Pairing: W/K first, but I don't really like them...so W/T eventually :-) And this is becoming B/S as well, it seems.
Setting: The story takes place roughly after The Killer in Me, so spoilers up to then. And if you have no idea about Season Three of Angel you'll be spoilt as well...so don't come running to me *lol*
Disclaimer: Willow, Tara, Kennedy, Anya et. al belong to Joss Whedon and ME and - hey you know whom they belong to. The story however is mine. Oh, the title is taken from a book called "Magic's Promise" by Mercedes Lackey. And there may be quotes from the show included in this story - I haven't really marked them, but if it sounds familiar - I mean it as an homage, I don't wanna violate any copyright, really. Please don't sue me!
Feedback: Yes please!!! I really appreciate it.
Distribution: If you want it, you can have it, just let me know where it ends up.
Summary: Spike and Tara talk.
Author's note: I know it's been ages since my last update, and I guess it'll take some time until the next as well - my cat gave birth to four kittens and the whole world (it seems) is coming to visit me - or them. I'll do my best though, I promise. Don't be mad... or sad :-)
***
Spike heard the front door open and close. Well, that probably wasn't Angel. Pity, really. He even would have taken a broom and taken care of the dust, he thought grimly. Upstairs, just when he left, things had been looking up... but he wasn't sure how they were now. Whether Buffy was already deeply in love with his grandsire again. Well, at least they were most probably not having crazy naked sex. That was something.
He snorted and stood up from his bed. Who was he fooling? That was nothing. Just as he had the feeling he was breaking through her shell, as he had begun to hope she might actually love him, he had to come back. As always, taking his woman away. He started pacing. If he really was, what should he do? Fight? Well, turning her first and probably greatest love into a big pile of dust probably wouldn't make her happy, he conceded. And if he should be so unlucky to be dusted - well, that wasn't the aim of the game either.
Great. He wondered what they were doing upstairs? He heard somebody pacing around upstairs... then some voices. Definitely not Buffy's though. Again, good or bad?
Suddenly, the door to the basement opened. He turned around to see who it was.
"Oh. You."
"I'm sorry, am I interrupting your - pacing?" Tara smiled as she walked down the steps."
"No, I just thought you were someone - different, you know?"
"There aren't so many people left now," she told him. "I mean, apart from the dozens of girls in the backyard... Buffy and Dawn have left for school, Xander's at work, Willow has classes...the others are still doing research..."
"Red really went to her classes today? Wouldn't have thought that. I mean with you being back and all."
"You don't know her." Tara grinned, a twinkle in her eye.
"I guess I don't. Not like you anyway." They shared a brief look of understaning. Sympathy. Then Spike asked, "Why research again? I thought they had everything figured out."
"I don't know about that. I just heard Mr. Giles say something about cross referencing and..."
"Yeah, I think that's his hobby," Spike said drily.
"Probably very relaxing." She laughed almost quietly. He chuckled. Then he looked at her intently .
"What is it?" she asked.
"I dunno. You're -"
"Different?" she continued as she didn't seem too sure how to continue. "Yeah, everybody seems to be thinking that."
"That's because you are. I mean, not that I knew you that well, but you've been here what - twelve hours, and already I get the feeling I know you better than I did before. You're a bit -less shy, you're more there, y'know?"
"I think I do. Willow and the others didn't tell me much, but everybody seems to be surprised when I - I dunno, say something - do something out of my own impulse. I guess I didn't do that before."
"Not that much, you didn't. But it's good - that you're more - there."
"You think so?" She didn't seem to be too sure of that.
"You think Red won't love you anymore."
Tara looked away and hid her face behind her hair. "That's more like the old you, you know," he commented.
"What?"
"Hiding like that."
"I thought you never noticed me."
"Well, sometimes I did. Anyway, just so you know - she'll always love you. I may not know too much, but well - you two are practically made for each other."
Tara sighed. "I don't know. Things are so much - they are different here."
"What, you mean with the demons and the vampires and the impending apocalypse?" He grinned.
"No, I mean - with the people. I can't believe Xander left Anya at the altar. They were - they are so happy and perfect together in my - the other world."
"Are they married already?" Spike wanted to know.
"What?" she seemed confused.
"You know, did they do it? Tie the knot, go actually through with it?"
"No, but-"
"No but," he interrupted her. "They may have seemed happy, but maybe they have been having the same doubts the whel - I mean Xander here had. And Anya. You never know what other people really feel. And even if they were married - what matters is what people feel."
"Huh?"
"Granted, I may have skipped a few points just now," he smiled. "What I'm trying to say is that Red loves you. Will always love you. And if I'm not completely mistaken, you love her too."
Tara didn't reply. "I'm not blind - the way you look at her - they way you just told me I didn't know her - the way there seems to be something missing when she's not around... I can see you feel it. I know how that feels." He paused, not sure how to continue. Tara looked at him.
"You aren't different," she told him. Then she frowned. "Except for the - y'know - whole being a vampire... I mean, you're just as nice as you are - I mean as Will is - I..."
"I get it." They didn't look at each other, for a moment lost in their own thoughts. Then Tara said, "Angel's still here."
Spike laughed shortly. "I bet he is. Otherwise there wouldn't be too much left of him, I guess."
"What - I mean - why..." she didn't seem to be sure how to ask.
"Yes?"
"Why do you hate him?"
"I don't hate him. I just - don't like him too much."
"I could see that." Tara sounded amused. "Is it because he was Buffy's first boyfriend?"
Spike glanced at her, confused. Then he realized. "You don't know, do you?"
"Know what?" She seemed curious.
"Things are a bit more complicated than that. Angel's my grandsire. You know what that means?"
She shook her head. "Angel made the vampire - sired the vampire - who made me. But he was more like a father figure. In the worst sense. We - I can't remember a time he didn't - we didn't hate each other. We're too different, I guess. He never liked me. Still doesn't."
"You wanted him to like you." It wasn't a question.
"No! I wanted - I just wanted to be better - worse than him. In a way that's still the same, you know? Then he got his soul and went away and when we met again we were enemies of the mortal kind - and when he lost it again, he stole my girlfriend. And now-"
"You're afraid he's doing that again."
He laughed almost contemptously. "Buffy's not - I mean I bet she wouldn't liek to be called my girlfriend."
"I'm not sure about that," Tara told him. Then she added, softly, "I'm not blind either."
He nodded, slowly. Then he sighed. "Well, you said she left for work, then?"
"Yes, and everyone except Angel and I are gone, more or less."
Spike raised an eyebrow. "Meaning?"
"Meaning there's a perfect opportunity to talk to him. About stuff. He has a soul now, too. Hasn't he? Maybe that'll make things easier." He didn't seem to happy. "You don't have to be best friends, you know? But I think you should talk - reasonably. I guess if he wants to help he'll stick around for some time, and I'm sure Buffy won't be too happy if you two circle each other like... you know... two guys fighting for her. I wouldn't like that."
He grinned. "I bet you wouldn't. But what if it were girls?"
"Very funny. You know what I mean."
"Yes. You're making too much sense, you know?"
She smiled smugly. "Dito."
"Where is he, then?"
"Still in the kitchen, I think. It's still dark there. But I can send him down here if you want." She waited for him to answer.
"No, I'll go upstairs. This feels too much like-"
"Your territory? Right, on to neutre grounds then." She smiled encouragingly at him, leading the way up the staircase. "I'll be upstairs," she told the two vampires when she and Spike had entered the kitchen. "I'll try to find some more of my stuff... and I guess I should try and read some of the books about witchcraft."
She didn't wait for them to reply, but simply left. Well then, a talk with the poofter it was. What a great day.
Author: ladydewinter
Email: ladydewinter@gmx.net
Rating: PG 13
Pairing: W/K first, but I don't really like them...so W/T eventually :-) And this is becoming B/S as well, it seems.
Setting: The story takes place roughly after The Killer in Me, so spoilers up to then. And if you have no idea about Season Three of Angel you'll be spoilt as well...so don't come running to me *lol*
Disclaimer: Willow, Tara, Kennedy, Anya et. al belong to Joss Whedon and ME and - hey you know whom they belong to. The story however is mine. Oh, the title is taken from a book called "Magic's Promise" by Mercedes Lackey. And there may be quotes from the show included in this story - I haven't really marked them, but if it sounds familiar - I mean it as an homage, I don't wanna violate any copyright, really. Please don't sue me!
Feedback: Yes please!!! I really appreciate it.
Distribution: If you want it, you can have it, just let me know where it ends up.
Summary: Spike and Tara talk.
Author's note: I know it's been ages since my last update, and I guess it'll take some time until the next as well - my cat gave birth to four kittens and the whole world (it seems) is coming to visit me - or them. I'll do my best though, I promise. Don't be mad... or sad :-)
***
Spike heard the front door open and close. Well, that probably wasn't Angel. Pity, really. He even would have taken a broom and taken care of the dust, he thought grimly. Upstairs, just when he left, things had been looking up... but he wasn't sure how they were now. Whether Buffy was already deeply in love with his grandsire again. Well, at least they were most probably not having crazy naked sex. That was something.
He snorted and stood up from his bed. Who was he fooling? That was nothing. Just as he had the feeling he was breaking through her shell, as he had begun to hope she might actually love him, he had to come back. As always, taking his woman away. He started pacing. If he really was, what should he do? Fight? Well, turning her first and probably greatest love into a big pile of dust probably wouldn't make her happy, he conceded. And if he should be so unlucky to be dusted - well, that wasn't the aim of the game either.
Great. He wondered what they were doing upstairs? He heard somebody pacing around upstairs... then some voices. Definitely not Buffy's though. Again, good or bad?
Suddenly, the door to the basement opened. He turned around to see who it was.
"Oh. You."
"I'm sorry, am I interrupting your - pacing?" Tara smiled as she walked down the steps."
"No, I just thought you were someone - different, you know?"
"There aren't so many people left now," she told him. "I mean, apart from the dozens of girls in the backyard... Buffy and Dawn have left for school, Xander's at work, Willow has classes...the others are still doing research..."
"Red really went to her classes today? Wouldn't have thought that. I mean with you being back and all."
"You don't know her." Tara grinned, a twinkle in her eye.
"I guess I don't. Not like you anyway." They shared a brief look of understaning. Sympathy. Then Spike asked, "Why research again? I thought they had everything figured out."
"I don't know about that. I just heard Mr. Giles say something about cross referencing and..."
"Yeah, I think that's his hobby," Spike said drily.
"Probably very relaxing." She laughed almost quietly. He chuckled. Then he looked at her intently .
"What is it?" she asked.
"I dunno. You're -"
"Different?" she continued as she didn't seem too sure how to continue. "Yeah, everybody seems to be thinking that."
"That's because you are. I mean, not that I knew you that well, but you've been here what - twelve hours, and already I get the feeling I know you better than I did before. You're a bit -less shy, you're more there, y'know?"
"I think I do. Willow and the others didn't tell me much, but everybody seems to be surprised when I - I dunno, say something - do something out of my own impulse. I guess I didn't do that before."
"Not that much, you didn't. But it's good - that you're more - there."
"You think so?" She didn't seem to be too sure of that.
"You think Red won't love you anymore."
Tara looked away and hid her face behind her hair. "That's more like the old you, you know," he commented.
"What?"
"Hiding like that."
"I thought you never noticed me."
"Well, sometimes I did. Anyway, just so you know - she'll always love you. I may not know too much, but well - you two are practically made for each other."
Tara sighed. "I don't know. Things are so much - they are different here."
"What, you mean with the demons and the vampires and the impending apocalypse?" He grinned.
"No, I mean - with the people. I can't believe Xander left Anya at the altar. They were - they are so happy and perfect together in my - the other world."
"Are they married already?" Spike wanted to know.
"What?" she seemed confused.
"You know, did they do it? Tie the knot, go actually through with it?"
"No, but-"
"No but," he interrupted her. "They may have seemed happy, but maybe they have been having the same doubts the whel - I mean Xander here had. And Anya. You never know what other people really feel. And even if they were married - what matters is what people feel."
"Huh?"
"Granted, I may have skipped a few points just now," he smiled. "What I'm trying to say is that Red loves you. Will always love you. And if I'm not completely mistaken, you love her too."
Tara didn't reply. "I'm not blind - the way you look at her - they way you just told me I didn't know her - the way there seems to be something missing when she's not around... I can see you feel it. I know how that feels." He paused, not sure how to continue. Tara looked at him.
"You aren't different," she told him. Then she frowned. "Except for the - y'know - whole being a vampire... I mean, you're just as nice as you are - I mean as Will is - I..."
"I get it." They didn't look at each other, for a moment lost in their own thoughts. Then Tara said, "Angel's still here."
Spike laughed shortly. "I bet he is. Otherwise there wouldn't be too much left of him, I guess."
"What - I mean - why..." she didn't seem to be sure how to ask.
"Yes?"
"Why do you hate him?"
"I don't hate him. I just - don't like him too much."
"I could see that." Tara sounded amused. "Is it because he was Buffy's first boyfriend?"
Spike glanced at her, confused. Then he realized. "You don't know, do you?"
"Know what?" She seemed curious.
"Things are a bit more complicated than that. Angel's my grandsire. You know what that means?"
She shook her head. "Angel made the vampire - sired the vampire - who made me. But he was more like a father figure. In the worst sense. We - I can't remember a time he didn't - we didn't hate each other. We're too different, I guess. He never liked me. Still doesn't."
"You wanted him to like you." It wasn't a question.
"No! I wanted - I just wanted to be better - worse than him. In a way that's still the same, you know? Then he got his soul and went away and when we met again we were enemies of the mortal kind - and when he lost it again, he stole my girlfriend. And now-"
"You're afraid he's doing that again."
He laughed almost contemptously. "Buffy's not - I mean I bet she wouldn't liek to be called my girlfriend."
"I'm not sure about that," Tara told him. Then she added, softly, "I'm not blind either."
He nodded, slowly. Then he sighed. "Well, you said she left for work, then?"
"Yes, and everyone except Angel and I are gone, more or less."
Spike raised an eyebrow. "Meaning?"
"Meaning there's a perfect opportunity to talk to him. About stuff. He has a soul now, too. Hasn't he? Maybe that'll make things easier." He didn't seem to happy. "You don't have to be best friends, you know? But I think you should talk - reasonably. I guess if he wants to help he'll stick around for some time, and I'm sure Buffy won't be too happy if you two circle each other like... you know... two guys fighting for her. I wouldn't like that."
He grinned. "I bet you wouldn't. But what if it were girls?"
"Very funny. You know what I mean."
"Yes. You're making too much sense, you know?"
She smiled smugly. "Dito."
"Where is he, then?"
"Still in the kitchen, I think. It's still dark there. But I can send him down here if you want." She waited for him to answer.
"No, I'll go upstairs. This feels too much like-"
"Your territory? Right, on to neutre grounds then." She smiled encouragingly at him, leading the way up the staircase. "I'll be upstairs," she told the two vampires when she and Spike had entered the kitchen. "I'll try to find some more of my stuff... and I guess I should try and read some of the books about witchcraft."
She didn't wait for them to reply, but simply left. Well then, a talk with the poofter it was. What a great day.