Disclaimer: I own nothing, save this plot.
I know it's sad but true.
Anything you recognize
Belongs to You-Know-Who
A/N: I think I may have come across as a bit confusing in the last chapter's author's notes. After this chapter, I will have exactly two chapters left to upload to ffnet. Don't worry, I wouldn't leave the story THAT unfinished ~ ~ Don't be surprised to see a sequel though! =) Lots of cookies to all those who reviewed ~ And since I'm feeling generous, cookies to those who read but didn't review. I love you all anyway! (But don't be afraid of the review button ~ I promise it won't hurt!)
~ Chapter 22 ~
Angeline sat in Lyle's office sorting through papers and personal belongings and boxing the items she wished to keep. The task would have been much less time consuming if she had a wand, but in her present frame of mind, the wand probably wouldn't be very useful. Madam Pomfrey had released her from the medical wing one week ago with the demand that she would not over exert herself. She had spent most of her time closed up in her room, electing to eat there as well in order to avoid unnecessary conversation. She had resumed teaching her Arithmancy class, but her heart truly wasn't in it. Several times Hermione had attempted to engage her in conversation after class, but she had successfully wormed her way out of it by claiming that she was tired or had a headache.
Her leg had been unhealable by magical means, and she was having to adjust to using crutches. Snape had nearly slammed into her in the hall one evening as they were both rushing about. Angeline had almost lost her balance, but Snape's arms had shot out to steady her. They exchanged awkward apologies and continued on their way. Other than this one confrontation, Snape had avoided Angeline as much as she avoided him. Both had assumed that the other did not want their company.
Angeline placed the last of the papers in a box and hobbled over to the desk. She was about to send for a house elf to help her carry off the boxes when she realized that she had missed the top drawer of the desk. When she opened the drawer, a small, bound parchment with a red ribbon caught her eye. She unraveled it and began to read.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Dear Ange,
I placed a spell on this letter to remain hidden until
my departure from Hogwarts, which if you're reading
this, I assume has occurred.
I don't know how much good this is going to do, but I
know I owe you an explanation and an apology. First
of all, as I am sure you have figured out by now, I am
a Death Eater. Voldemort first approached me this
summer and I agreed to do a service for him in
exchange for getting father out of Azkaban. I know
what you're thinking, but people can change, Ange.
I know if Father is given a chance, things could be
much different.
I didn't know until we were sent to Hogwarts exactly
what Voldemort wanted me to do. When he told me
that I was to bring you for a Binding ceremony, I was
reluctant, but Voldemort promised you would not be
hurt. I knew that you had been working on a counter
potion when we were younger, so I took your diary from
your room before Christmas and copied down the ingredients.
I had not finished the process when you found your diary in
my room. I'm sorry, but I had to use a memory charm on
you to make you think you had left it there by mistake.
When I took you from your room, I looked for your diary
again and I couldn't find it anywhere. I apologize for the
state I left your room in.
Second, I won't be able to see you for a while, because I
know Dumbledore will never let me near the school once
he has found out what I am. A lot has happened this year
in the school that I am sure you suspected I did, but I
assure you that I did not hurt anyone in the school. I cannot
tell you anymore than this for safety reasons.
I don't know if you'll ever be able to forgive me for betraying
your trust, but I hope that you'll understand one day. As
a Death Eater, I will be able to bring our family back
together. I'll never let anyone hurt you, Ange, no matter
what the cost. One day maybe Father will come around
too. I just hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me.
Always remember that I love you and I'll always be
watching out for you, no matter where I am. Maybe
one day I'll see you again.
Love always,
Lyle
P.S. Always follow your heart. That's one lesson
that you've always tried to teach me, but I was always
too stubborn to listen to until now.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Angeline clinched the parchment in her hands and sobbed uncontrollably. Her grief had finally caught up to her and the finality of the situation set in as she buried her face in the sleeve of her robes.
Snape was passing by the door of Lyle's office on his way to dinner when he heard someone inside the room crying. He swept silently inside and saw Angeline at the desk shaking in an attempt to gain control. She had not seen him enter, so he stood and watched her silently for a few moments. Her head was down on the desk and her face was buried in the layers of robes she was wearing. It muffled her crying only minimally.
"I don't suppose you would want company?" Snape said quietly.
Angeline jumped up and turned her back to Snape to keep him from seeing her face.
"I'm sorry I startled you. I was on my way to dinner~"
"You don't have to stay. It's not part of your job description, you know," she managed to speak in a tight, shaky voice.
Snape moved around to face Angeline. Her face was tear stained and flushed. Her necklace had a tiny amount of blue mist fizzling about in the center. She obviously was still extremely weak, otherwise it would have had more color in it.
"No." Snape gently urged Angeline back into the seat. "I'm sorry that I said what I did." He watched her closely as the tears continued to stream down her face.
Snape knelt down in the floor before her and took her hand. She felt childish crying in front of him, but the flood gates had been opened, and she had no else to talk to. She handed Snape the letter and he read it quietly. He nodded and gave it back. He stared deep into her eyes and tried to figure out what was running through her mind.
"I just don't understand ~ how could he ~ I mean ~ what was he thinking?" Angeline's sorrow was laced with frustration and anger. "If I had only known ~" she trailed off as the memories came flooding back causing her voice to choke up. She stood abruptly, pulling her hand away to use her crutches. "But listen to me ramble on about my problems," she said while attempting rather unsuccessfully to sound as though she had cleared her mind. "I need to hurry up and get these things out of here. I still have homework to grade, tests to work on ~"
"Angeline," Snape interrupted her and placed his hands on her shoulders. He knew she was still crying because her shoulders were shaking.
" ~ and I have to ~ have to ~" Angeline fought to push the images from her mind. Thoughts of her father swept through her mind. She understood how much Lyle craved having their father in his life, but she had been terrified of him as a child and Lyle had almost always given up the rare father-son moments in order to keep their father from abusing her. Now Lyle was dead and her father was alive. Her worst nightmares had come true all in one night and she couldn't seem to find any way to cope with it all.
Angeline's legs felt like jelly. Snape forced her to face him, and before she could think, he had pulled her close against him. His cloak enveloped her and she felt his warmth around her body. Her face was pressed into his chest, hiding her eyes from the harsh world around her. As she wept, Snape pulled her protectively closer and ran one hand through her hair.
In what felt like an eternity later, Angeline's tears had melted into exhaustion. She felt as though a burden had been lifted from her soul, taking all of its negative energy with it. She became aware of where she was as if awakening from a trance, and she realized how comforting Snape was. She listened intently to his heart beating in her ear as his chest rose and fell rhythmically. It was then that she hoped the moment would never end. She wanted to remain there with Snape and not ever have to think about the rest of the world again.
Like all good things, the moment did end. Dumbledore knocked on the door and stepped into the room considerately remaining silent until Angeline was ready to turn and face him.
"I thought I would come and see how everything was going since neither of you came to dinner." Dumbledore's blue eyes twinkled compassionately as he watched Angeline dry the tears from her face and turn to face him.
"I'm sorry ~"
"There's no need to apologize, my dear. I'd say you were about due for a meltdown. I knew you were handling your stress a little too well," Dumbledore offered with a gentle smile. "Everyone has to deal with pain in their own time and in their own way ~ you just allowed yours to pile up and attack you all at once."
"You haven't been sleeping well at night, have you?" Snape asked.
Angeline shook her head and crossed her arms. "No, as a matter of fact, I haven't. I've been ~" she stopped because she felt a bit foolish.
"Having nightmares," Snape finished her sentence.
"Yes," she offered hesitantly.
Dumbledore cleared his throat and looked at his watch. "Well, I do believe that you two have everything in order here, so I shall leave you to your thoughts ~ oh, I will be leaving next week for the mountains. I do not anticipate being back before the term is over, but Minerva knows how to reach me should anything be wrong. I have quite a bit of planning to do before this summer, but I know I am leaving the children in the hands of a very capable staff." Dumbledore's last sentence sent a twinge of pride through both Angeline and Snape. Dumbledore nodded and slipped silently out of the room.
"If you are feeling up to it, we can ride back on the train with the children at the end of the term to visit Ollivanders to see about getting you a new wand."
Angeline's gaze fell to the floor. "Severus ~ I don't even know if I can still ~ if I'm still able to ~"
"Nonsense. Look at your necklace."
Angeline looked in a mirror and saw the blue mist grow.
"Granted, it will not be an easy road, but with help, you'll recover."
"Voldemort did succeed in ridding me of my mediphagic powers. That's something that I've lost forever." Angeline was a little discouraged, but she had at least come to terms with all she had been harboring. "I'm afraid that everything else is only speculation."
"You need to rest. Everything will fall into place when you regain your strength." Snape tilted her chin up so that their eyes would meet. "Leave these boxes here and I will tend to them." Angeline made a motion to speak, but Snape continued. "I want you to take a Dreamless Sleep potion for the next few nights. That will give you the strength to ort through your nightmares later."
Angeline offered no protest as he escorted her out of the room. "You go on upstairs and prepare for bed, and I'll be up shortly with the potion."
I had taken Angeline a while to hobble up the stairs to her room from the office, so she had just barely gotten her evening robe on when Snape knocked on the door. She bid him inside and made her way into the bedroom. As she leaned her crutches up against the wall and slid onto the bed, Snape poured the potion into a goblet.
"Angeline, how did you discover the counter potion for the Binding poison?" The question had been rattling in his mind for days, and he found it creeping out without thinking.
"Father performed a Binding ceremony on Mother when I was younger," she answered as she remembered the event with bitterness. "He thought he would be able to harvest her powers for himself before letting her die, so he broke out of Azkaban and hunted us down. He waited until Lyle and I were both in school and then he attacked her in our house ~ When I came home for Christmas break, I found her in the bedroom on the floor. I don't know exactly how long she had been there." Angeline cleared her throat before continuing. "Anyway, it sort of became my obsession, and I spent my free time learning healing charms and defense against the dark arts. When I graduated, I joined a ministry department for a few years and investigated instances specifically related to the Forbidden Arts. I created the potion based on research I had conducted. I had never actually had the opportunity to test it ~ but I suppose it works considering I'm sitting here rambling to you," Angeline smiled feebly. "When I went as far as I could with it, I quit the ministry position and obtained a job as a nurse in a local hospital. I still experimented with different potions while I was there. I suppose it's become a bit of a hobby." A small sigh escaped her. She had relived enough childhood memories for one lifetime, and her fatigue had caught up with her.
Snape looked at Angeline with intrigue. "Sorry to make you relive old memories," he said as if reading her mind. "Here, drink all of it," he said as he handed her the goblet.
She took it in her hands and sighed again. She glanced at Snape and then turned up the goblet to drink its contents. Immediately she felt a comforting warmth surround her. Her entire body felt as though it were floating, and all of her aches and pains disappeared. She was vaguely aware of Snape taking the goblet from her hand, and she was completely carried away into darkness a second later.
Snape caught Angeline's swaying body and laid her comfortably back in the bed. He had never seen the potion work so quickly and he realized just how weary she must have been. He placed the goblet on the night stand and propped her cast-bound leg up on a pillow. He loosened her robe and then pulled the covers up over her. As he crossed the room, he took one last glance at her serenely sleeping form and a caring smile crept upon his face. He thought about Lyle's last words and then left to bring Lyle's things up from the office.
***
***
***
A/N: Yay! One down, two to go. Thanks for reading, and don't forget to review!
I know it's sad but true.
Anything you recognize
Belongs to You-Know-Who
A/N: I think I may have come across as a bit confusing in the last chapter's author's notes. After this chapter, I will have exactly two chapters left to upload to ffnet. Don't worry, I wouldn't leave the story THAT unfinished ~ ~ Don't be surprised to see a sequel though! =) Lots of cookies to all those who reviewed ~ And since I'm feeling generous, cookies to those who read but didn't review. I love you all anyway! (But don't be afraid of the review button ~ I promise it won't hurt!)
~ Chapter 22 ~
Angeline sat in Lyle's office sorting through papers and personal belongings and boxing the items she wished to keep. The task would have been much less time consuming if she had a wand, but in her present frame of mind, the wand probably wouldn't be very useful. Madam Pomfrey had released her from the medical wing one week ago with the demand that she would not over exert herself. She had spent most of her time closed up in her room, electing to eat there as well in order to avoid unnecessary conversation. She had resumed teaching her Arithmancy class, but her heart truly wasn't in it. Several times Hermione had attempted to engage her in conversation after class, but she had successfully wormed her way out of it by claiming that she was tired or had a headache.
Her leg had been unhealable by magical means, and she was having to adjust to using crutches. Snape had nearly slammed into her in the hall one evening as they were both rushing about. Angeline had almost lost her balance, but Snape's arms had shot out to steady her. They exchanged awkward apologies and continued on their way. Other than this one confrontation, Snape had avoided Angeline as much as she avoided him. Both had assumed that the other did not want their company.
Angeline placed the last of the papers in a box and hobbled over to the desk. She was about to send for a house elf to help her carry off the boxes when she realized that she had missed the top drawer of the desk. When she opened the drawer, a small, bound parchment with a red ribbon caught her eye. She unraveled it and began to read.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Dear Ange,
I placed a spell on this letter to remain hidden until
my departure from Hogwarts, which if you're reading
this, I assume has occurred.
I don't know how much good this is going to do, but I
know I owe you an explanation and an apology. First
of all, as I am sure you have figured out by now, I am
a Death Eater. Voldemort first approached me this
summer and I agreed to do a service for him in
exchange for getting father out of Azkaban. I know
what you're thinking, but people can change, Ange.
I know if Father is given a chance, things could be
much different.
I didn't know until we were sent to Hogwarts exactly
what Voldemort wanted me to do. When he told me
that I was to bring you for a Binding ceremony, I was
reluctant, but Voldemort promised you would not be
hurt. I knew that you had been working on a counter
potion when we were younger, so I took your diary from
your room before Christmas and copied down the ingredients.
I had not finished the process when you found your diary in
my room. I'm sorry, but I had to use a memory charm on
you to make you think you had left it there by mistake.
When I took you from your room, I looked for your diary
again and I couldn't find it anywhere. I apologize for the
state I left your room in.
Second, I won't be able to see you for a while, because I
know Dumbledore will never let me near the school once
he has found out what I am. A lot has happened this year
in the school that I am sure you suspected I did, but I
assure you that I did not hurt anyone in the school. I cannot
tell you anymore than this for safety reasons.
I don't know if you'll ever be able to forgive me for betraying
your trust, but I hope that you'll understand one day. As
a Death Eater, I will be able to bring our family back
together. I'll never let anyone hurt you, Ange, no matter
what the cost. One day maybe Father will come around
too. I just hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me.
Always remember that I love you and I'll always be
watching out for you, no matter where I am. Maybe
one day I'll see you again.
Love always,
Lyle
P.S. Always follow your heart. That's one lesson
that you've always tried to teach me, but I was always
too stubborn to listen to until now.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Angeline clinched the parchment in her hands and sobbed uncontrollably. Her grief had finally caught up to her and the finality of the situation set in as she buried her face in the sleeve of her robes.
Snape was passing by the door of Lyle's office on his way to dinner when he heard someone inside the room crying. He swept silently inside and saw Angeline at the desk shaking in an attempt to gain control. She had not seen him enter, so he stood and watched her silently for a few moments. Her head was down on the desk and her face was buried in the layers of robes she was wearing. It muffled her crying only minimally.
"I don't suppose you would want company?" Snape said quietly.
Angeline jumped up and turned her back to Snape to keep him from seeing her face.
"I'm sorry I startled you. I was on my way to dinner~"
"You don't have to stay. It's not part of your job description, you know," she managed to speak in a tight, shaky voice.
Snape moved around to face Angeline. Her face was tear stained and flushed. Her necklace had a tiny amount of blue mist fizzling about in the center. She obviously was still extremely weak, otherwise it would have had more color in it.
"No." Snape gently urged Angeline back into the seat. "I'm sorry that I said what I did." He watched her closely as the tears continued to stream down her face.
Snape knelt down in the floor before her and took her hand. She felt childish crying in front of him, but the flood gates had been opened, and she had no else to talk to. She handed Snape the letter and he read it quietly. He nodded and gave it back. He stared deep into her eyes and tried to figure out what was running through her mind.
"I just don't understand ~ how could he ~ I mean ~ what was he thinking?" Angeline's sorrow was laced with frustration and anger. "If I had only known ~" she trailed off as the memories came flooding back causing her voice to choke up. She stood abruptly, pulling her hand away to use her crutches. "But listen to me ramble on about my problems," she said while attempting rather unsuccessfully to sound as though she had cleared her mind. "I need to hurry up and get these things out of here. I still have homework to grade, tests to work on ~"
"Angeline," Snape interrupted her and placed his hands on her shoulders. He knew she was still crying because her shoulders were shaking.
" ~ and I have to ~ have to ~" Angeline fought to push the images from her mind. Thoughts of her father swept through her mind. She understood how much Lyle craved having their father in his life, but she had been terrified of him as a child and Lyle had almost always given up the rare father-son moments in order to keep their father from abusing her. Now Lyle was dead and her father was alive. Her worst nightmares had come true all in one night and she couldn't seem to find any way to cope with it all.
Angeline's legs felt like jelly. Snape forced her to face him, and before she could think, he had pulled her close against him. His cloak enveloped her and she felt his warmth around her body. Her face was pressed into his chest, hiding her eyes from the harsh world around her. As she wept, Snape pulled her protectively closer and ran one hand through her hair.
In what felt like an eternity later, Angeline's tears had melted into exhaustion. She felt as though a burden had been lifted from her soul, taking all of its negative energy with it. She became aware of where she was as if awakening from a trance, and she realized how comforting Snape was. She listened intently to his heart beating in her ear as his chest rose and fell rhythmically. It was then that she hoped the moment would never end. She wanted to remain there with Snape and not ever have to think about the rest of the world again.
Like all good things, the moment did end. Dumbledore knocked on the door and stepped into the room considerately remaining silent until Angeline was ready to turn and face him.
"I thought I would come and see how everything was going since neither of you came to dinner." Dumbledore's blue eyes twinkled compassionately as he watched Angeline dry the tears from her face and turn to face him.
"I'm sorry ~"
"There's no need to apologize, my dear. I'd say you were about due for a meltdown. I knew you were handling your stress a little too well," Dumbledore offered with a gentle smile. "Everyone has to deal with pain in their own time and in their own way ~ you just allowed yours to pile up and attack you all at once."
"You haven't been sleeping well at night, have you?" Snape asked.
Angeline shook her head and crossed her arms. "No, as a matter of fact, I haven't. I've been ~" she stopped because she felt a bit foolish.
"Having nightmares," Snape finished her sentence.
"Yes," she offered hesitantly.
Dumbledore cleared his throat and looked at his watch. "Well, I do believe that you two have everything in order here, so I shall leave you to your thoughts ~ oh, I will be leaving next week for the mountains. I do not anticipate being back before the term is over, but Minerva knows how to reach me should anything be wrong. I have quite a bit of planning to do before this summer, but I know I am leaving the children in the hands of a very capable staff." Dumbledore's last sentence sent a twinge of pride through both Angeline and Snape. Dumbledore nodded and slipped silently out of the room.
"If you are feeling up to it, we can ride back on the train with the children at the end of the term to visit Ollivanders to see about getting you a new wand."
Angeline's gaze fell to the floor. "Severus ~ I don't even know if I can still ~ if I'm still able to ~"
"Nonsense. Look at your necklace."
Angeline looked in a mirror and saw the blue mist grow.
"Granted, it will not be an easy road, but with help, you'll recover."
"Voldemort did succeed in ridding me of my mediphagic powers. That's something that I've lost forever." Angeline was a little discouraged, but she had at least come to terms with all she had been harboring. "I'm afraid that everything else is only speculation."
"You need to rest. Everything will fall into place when you regain your strength." Snape tilted her chin up so that their eyes would meet. "Leave these boxes here and I will tend to them." Angeline made a motion to speak, but Snape continued. "I want you to take a Dreamless Sleep potion for the next few nights. That will give you the strength to ort through your nightmares later."
Angeline offered no protest as he escorted her out of the room. "You go on upstairs and prepare for bed, and I'll be up shortly with the potion."
I had taken Angeline a while to hobble up the stairs to her room from the office, so she had just barely gotten her evening robe on when Snape knocked on the door. She bid him inside and made her way into the bedroom. As she leaned her crutches up against the wall and slid onto the bed, Snape poured the potion into a goblet.
"Angeline, how did you discover the counter potion for the Binding poison?" The question had been rattling in his mind for days, and he found it creeping out without thinking.
"Father performed a Binding ceremony on Mother when I was younger," she answered as she remembered the event with bitterness. "He thought he would be able to harvest her powers for himself before letting her die, so he broke out of Azkaban and hunted us down. He waited until Lyle and I were both in school and then he attacked her in our house ~ When I came home for Christmas break, I found her in the bedroom on the floor. I don't know exactly how long she had been there." Angeline cleared her throat before continuing. "Anyway, it sort of became my obsession, and I spent my free time learning healing charms and defense against the dark arts. When I graduated, I joined a ministry department for a few years and investigated instances specifically related to the Forbidden Arts. I created the potion based on research I had conducted. I had never actually had the opportunity to test it ~ but I suppose it works considering I'm sitting here rambling to you," Angeline smiled feebly. "When I went as far as I could with it, I quit the ministry position and obtained a job as a nurse in a local hospital. I still experimented with different potions while I was there. I suppose it's become a bit of a hobby." A small sigh escaped her. She had relived enough childhood memories for one lifetime, and her fatigue had caught up with her.
Snape looked at Angeline with intrigue. "Sorry to make you relive old memories," he said as if reading her mind. "Here, drink all of it," he said as he handed her the goblet.
She took it in her hands and sighed again. She glanced at Snape and then turned up the goblet to drink its contents. Immediately she felt a comforting warmth surround her. Her entire body felt as though it were floating, and all of her aches and pains disappeared. She was vaguely aware of Snape taking the goblet from her hand, and she was completely carried away into darkness a second later.
Snape caught Angeline's swaying body and laid her comfortably back in the bed. He had never seen the potion work so quickly and he realized just how weary she must have been. He placed the goblet on the night stand and propped her cast-bound leg up on a pillow. He loosened her robe and then pulled the covers up over her. As he crossed the room, he took one last glance at her serenely sleeping form and a caring smile crept upon his face. He thought about Lyle's last words and then left to bring Lyle's things up from the office.
***
***
***
A/N: Yay! One down, two to go. Thanks for reading, and don't forget to review!