Allen was staring at Van and me. "Hitomi."
"What?" I snapped. "Oh, sorry."
He ignored it. "There's something I have to tell you."
"What is it?"
"Uh…" He looked at Van. "Uh…"
I kept quiet.
"The thing is…um…"
"Spill it." Van said angrily beside him.
Allen's eyes turned cloudy. "The thing is…I'm sorry…"
I felt the tears. Oh yeah. "About what?" My voice, I knew, was starting to quiver.
"I'm in love with Millerna."
When he said it himself, it sounded like a knife just struck my heart. "Oh." I turned away from both of them.
"And, uh…" I heard him take a deep breath. "I want to break up."
"Oh." I murmured once again.
The place was quiet and hushed. I knew I couldn't keep the tears in. I cried freely and felt my shoulders shaking. Someone was coming over to me, but I stopped him, whoever it was. "Don't go near me right now."
"I'm so sorry, Hitomi…"
"Don't give me that." I said through gritted teeth. "Don't give me that!" I cried.
"All right, I won't."
I turned back around and faced him. "You do not have the right to do this to me!!" I yelled. "You can't just break my heart like this! I trusted you to take care of me! To love me as much as I loved you!! And I hate you! I hate you for throwing that in my face!! And…and…" I sobbed and gulped. "Y-you can't do this to me…"
"Look, I loved you, Hitomi. I did, so much…but…"
"You just got bored of me."
"N-not…no…"
I paused. "I don't hate you, Allen…I loved you so much…and it just hurts."
"I'm really sorry."
I shook my head. "Please don't..."
"Ok…I-I…"
"You don't apologize for something you intend to do." I glanced away and looked at Van. His eyes were full of compassion and…and concern. "Can you open the elevator? I want to go back to my dorm."
He watched me and said, "ok."
He pressed the 'stop' button again and it worked. The elevator stopped on the nearest floor and I got out as fast as I could.
*Allen and Van's conversation*
"God that sucked." Allen muttered.
"I can't believe you, Allen." Van replied. "I can't believe you hurt her that much."
He kept quiet.
"So what are you gonna do now?"
"I don't know." He shook his head. "I really don't know."
"Let's go back up, huh?"
"Yeah." He said grudgingly.
*Normal POV*
I opened the door to our dorm and walked to the bathroom. I washed my face up and wiped. I got out and walked to the living room where Millerna was.
"Hey, what happened?" Millerna asked concernedly.
I smiled ruefully. "I broke up with Allen."
"You did?"
"Yeah." I glanced away. "It's ok."
She walked over to me and rubbed my back. "I'm sorry, Hitomi."
"It was no one's fault." I put my head down on the couch spine. "I just wish I didn't fall in love with him and get hurt like this."
"But you know that love hurts…you were warned, remember?"
"Yeah I know." I sighed. "Anyway…"
"It'll be okay. Allen's not the only guy in this world."
"I see that." I giggled.
She laughed. "Besides, I want to tell you that I am not interested in Van anymore."
"You're not?" I asked, surprised.
"Nope." She grinned. "He's interested in someone else, and besides…I've taken a liking to another guy." She blushed.
"Is it anyone I know?"
"I'm sorry, but I can't tell you."
"How come?"
"You'll get mad at me for…liking him. I have no intention of dating him. I just………I'm just…"
"Is it Allen?" I asked pensively.
"I'm so sorry." Millerna buried her face on my back.
I patted her. "It's ok, Millerna. You're entitled to your own feelings." I smiled at her. "I think you should date him."
"No. No…"
"I think you want to."
"I-I…I…" She started. "No, because I value our friendship more than I value him."
"That's so sweet, Millerna." I hugged her. "You're the best friend a girl could ever have."
"You too, Hitomi."
I looked at her. "I want to tell you something. We broke up in the elevator and Van was there."
"How did that happen?" She asked.
"Wait. The first thing, well the second thing that Allen told me…was he was in love with you."
Her eyes widened. "What??" Her cheeks turned so pink it was adorable. "You're kidding me."
"I'm not. He said, I'm so sorry…and then he said that he loves you."
"Gosh I feel so horrible." Millerna stood up. "I am not the best friend a girl could have. I am the worst." She said quietly.
"No you aren't!" I insisted. "I'm glad that he loves you and not some bimbo in this school."
She frowned. "But Hitomi, I feel like…I feel like I'm taking your man…"
"Don't. He's not mine anymore." I glanced down at my hands.
***
The rest of the night pretty much went like that. Millerna and I talked it over. As much as I hated facing the girl Allen dumped me for………she was still my best friend and nothing could change that ever.
***
It was the first day of Spring Break. I found out that Millerna was planning to go home. All the plans that I made to go back home and surprise my family went down the drain. I didn't feel like leaving the school. I just stayed in my dorm without anyone, so it was really boring. I never even got a chance to talk to Allen after the break-up, which was something I was really glad for.
***
Early morning of the second day of Spring Break, I was hungry for food and the dorm absolutely had none. I completely forgot to buy any food or supplies. My stomach was starting to talk to me, saying that if it weren't fed, it'd die on me. The only choice I had was to go down to their dorm and ask for food…that was very hard for me. I had to swallow my pride and face him again. I just hoped he wasn't there.
I walked to the elevator wearing my pj's. There were no people in the lobby of our floor. I finally got to their room and knocked quietly on the door. I waited a while and no one opened the door. I tried once again, louder this time, and Van opened it.
"Hey." His eyes widened at seeing me.
"Hi." I said shyly. "Is he here?" I asked quietly.
"No, he went on vacation." He replied. "You looking for him?"
"No, no." I smiled and went in. "Thank God he's not here."
He looked surprised. "Ok…"
"The thing is…I have no food in my dorm and I'm really hungry."
"Why didn't you buy last night?"
"I forgot." I mumbled.
"Oh."
I followed him back to his room and saw that it was still kept neat. "You kept your promise." I smiled happily. "Thank you."
"It wasn't hard." He winked. "Listen, I'm gonna go back to sleep, ok? I got one more hour."
"Do you mind if I eat some of your stuff?"
"I've always minded, but you eat it anyway."
"Right." I closed his door and walked to the kitchen. 'I wonder why Van didn't go anywhere.'
I didn't want to go back to my apartment, so I stayed at his. I watched some TV while snacking on some toast and pancakes. He finally woke up and went to the bathroom first. When he was freshened up, he glanced at me.
"Wow, you did eat a lot."
"Yep." I grinned. "I made some pancakes for you. It's in the microwave."
"Thanks." He smiled.
"It's your stuff." I shrugged and kept watching.
He brought the pancakes to the living room and sat beside me. "How come you didn't go anywhere?" I asked him.
"Don't know." He shrugged his shoulders. "My folks don't really care. As long as I go back for summer, they're fine with me staying here during other holidays."
"Even Christmas?"
"Yeah."
"Wow." I looked at the TV again. "Don't you miss your family, though?"
"Sure."
I scoffed.
"How about you?" He asked, nudging me.
"I wanted to go back to my family, but after the break-up………I really wasn't in the mood to go anywhere."
"I understand."
I hesitated a while until I just had to ask him. "Van?"
"Yeah?"
"When I broke up with Allen, I didn't break up with you, did I?"
"What do you mean?" He asked, staring at me confusingly.
"It's just that…you're my friend too, and I-I…I enjoy coming here. So…do you mind if I stay here…with you everyday? It gets so boring in the apartment without anybody to talk to."
"I like having you here." He grinned. "You're nice company."
"Good, it's good, not nice."
He laughed. "Mean the same."
"Not the right grammar, though." I smiled. "Thanks."
"Yep."
I stared at the TV for the longest time. And I got pretty bored.
"Let's go out, k?" I asked. "After I change."
"Go out?"
"Yeah. Let's go to the mall." I grinned.
He laughed. "Uh, no."
"What? Why not?"
"I'm a guy. So you see…guys don't go to malls with girls."
"Oh I realize that, but see, this girl," I pointed to myself, "doesn't take long to shop."
"Oh I see." He smiled. "But listen, that's a lie."
I pouted. "Fine, it is, but come on, Van! I don't have anybody to go with! And it's gonna be so boring if you stay here all by yourself!"
He sighed. "I'd rather watch TV than hang out in the mall."
"But we're not going to hang out in the mall." I persuaded. "I just need to buy a few things."
"How long?"
"Um…no more than an hour."
"Well…"
"Van, please!"
He stared at me, deciding.
I smiled my most charming smile.
He sighed. "Fine, fine. Happy?"
"Yes." I grinned. "I'll be back."
***
When it was 12:30pm, I decided to go back to my dorm and change into more appropriate clothes. Then I went back up. I knocked on the door and Van opened it. He looked…wow. He wore a pair of baggy jeans, which he looked so hunky in and a silver Nike shirt. He smelled so nice too.
"Hey." I smiled nervously.
"'Ey. Let's go." He got out of the room and locked the door.
"Ok."
***
We walked together to the nearby mall. "All right, so I'm timing you. I'm gonna go to the Entertainment store and you meet me there in an hour."
"Wait a second." I stopped. "You're not coming with me?"
"I'm already going to the mall with you! What more do you want?"
"Fine." I sighed. "I'll just meet you there then." I said silently.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to say it like that." He put a hand on my shoulder.
"Really now?" I squinted my eyes at him.
He laughed and backed off. "Seriously."
"Ok fine." I grinned.
"I'm going." He started to walk.
"Bye, Van." I called.
"See ya."
***
I went to the stores I needed to go to. In the end, I held 4 bags, but they weren't heavy. I bought a pair of shoes, two shirts, one blouse, and two pairs of jeans, a few cosmetics, and two CDs. I found the Entertainment store Van was talking about and looked for him through the glass.
I went in and walked over to him. "Van." I called quietly.
He turned around and grinned. "You're back."
"Right on time."
"Ok. Just let me buy this."
"What is it?"
"CD."
"CD of?"
"It's a CD, all right?"
I decided to back off.
***
When he finished paying, we went to a nearby bench. "Can we go back to the school? I just need to put these bags down and we can go do something else."
"Yeah ok."
I stood up, but he had no intention to. "Van...!"
"Yeah?"
"Aren't you coming back with me?"
"No." He gave me that look. "You're going back to put your stuff down. I only got this CD with me."
"Ugh, fine. Leave me out on the streets. If I get kidnapped, I'm blaming you." I muttered.
"Fine, I'm going with you." He stood up quickly.
That surprised me. "Oh…ok."
"Although I have a hard time thinking you'll get kidnapped. You're a 22-year-old woman."
"So? There are such things as drunk guys or rapists."
"You got a point."
"Thank you."
I put my bags down in my room and he put his CD in his room. We met at the first floor lobby and went out again. The sun seemed to be getting sunnier by the hour. It was pretty outside. The flowers were blooming and the grasses were freshly cut.
"So what is your CD?" I asked.
"Lay off, will you?" He asked back.
"Come on. It's not that hard to just say it." I nudged again.
He sighed, irritated. "It's a Shakira CD, all right?" He got so red.
I giggled. "Okay!"
"She's got a nice voice, that's all." He defended.
I laughed again. "Whatever you say."
"Fine, she's hot."
I looked up at his reddened face. "Your secret's safe with me. No one will know."
He glanced at me. "It's not a secret."
"Oh?"
"A lot of guys like her." He muttered. "I just happen to be………one of them."
I giggled.
Then he changed the subject. "Where are we going now?" Van asked.
"You want to go to the park?"
"Why not."
***
The park was about 2 blocks away from our school, but you could see it clearly. There were a lot of kids playing around and many people relaxing. I even saw some people I knew from school.
"There are too many people." Van complained.
"I know, but it'll be fun." I smiled.
"I don't like kids."
"You were a kid once."
"So? I didn't like me when I was a kid."
"Why don't you like kids?"
"They're annoying and bratty."
"Not all of them."
"Sure. You think that now."
"Van…they're not that bad." I insisted.
"Ah well."
***
We got to the park and walked along the grass. There were a lot of picnic tables and we could smell the roasting of barbecued pork. The playgrounds were filled with so many kids. The water park beside it was full of little kids running around in bathing suits.
"I want to be a kid again." I murmured.
"Why??"
"I don't know. It seems fun to be just…carefree. No problems to worry about…"
"But being a kid means you can't be independent."
"Sure, but still." I glanced at the basketball court. "Hey, you should play."
"Play what?"
"Basketball."
He smirked. "Nah."
"Why not?"
"Those kids are too young for me."
"So?"
"It wouldn't be fair. I'd get the advantage."
"I see."
"Let's just go walk around."
"Ok." I smiled. I was glad that he was willing to go to the park with me and walk around.
***
I glanced around. "What are you going to do after college?"
"I…I, uh, I guess I'll be a Computer Programmer. Those are the courses I'm taking, so…yeah."
"You don't sound sure of it." I looked up at him.
He let out a regretful laugh. "I'm not. My parents forced me to do it."
"How come?"
"My dad's a programmer and he's really successful. I guess they thought that if I took it too, I'd be successful like him."
"But you don't like doing it?"
"Nope. Never was interested in computers."
"Didn't you ever try telling them that it wasn't the thing for you?"
He glanced at me. "Why so curious?"
I smiled lightly. "I don't know."
He watched me for one more second and then he continued. "I tried a lot of times to tell them that this wasn't what I wanted to do, but they always found a way to ignore it. They kept saying that it didn't matter, just as long as you were successful and you got a lot of money, the job didn't matter."
"That's harsh."
"Yeah I know." He reached for a leaf on the tree. "Just thinking of…working on computers the rest of my life, it scares me. I'll never be able to enjoy what I'm doing, which sucks."
"Sorry, Van."
"Ah well. Someday, maybe I'll start liking it." He paused. "How about you? What are you going to do after college?"
"I'm going to be a Computer Animator." I nodded. "I always wanted to do something in computers and animation."
"That's a good choice."
"I made it a long time ago."
"Lucky your parents didn't force you."
"I guess so." I looked up at him. "I'm sorry your parents made your decision."
"I got over it a long time ago." He looked at me too.
"Are you planning to leave the city after you graduate?"
"Uh…not sure. If I find a job here, then I don't think so…but you never know. You?"
"Yeah." I smiled. "I always wanted to go back to Japan and get a job there…near my family."
"So you got a close-knit family, huh?"
"You could say that." I laughed.
***
Later on, we walked by the grassy fields. "I got an idea." He grinned and took my hand. "Come on."
"Where are we going?" We walked to the water park.
I then knew what he was going to do. I tried prying my hand off. "Van, no! Van…no!!"
"Come on, Hitomi! It'll be fun!!" He kept on pulling me.
"No!! Please don't!" I begged as I laughed. "No!!"
"If you don't come with me, I'll be forced to carry you!"
My eyes widened. "You wouldn't dare!"
"Try me!" He had a mischievous sparkle in his eyes.
"Aah, Van no!!"
The next thing I knew he picked me up and started carrying me towards the water park. "No! Van, put me down this instant!!" I yelled.
"You said you wanted to be a kid again!!"
"I didn't mean it!!" I protested. "Put me down!"
"No way!!"
Suddenly, I felt cold water hit my bare arms. I shut my eyes and covered my face, and then I felt him put me down. I looked up and saw that we were indeed in the middle of the water park. Kids were running around us. I heard Van's deep laughing from one side. I felt my clothes getting soaked from head to toe.
"Aah! Van, you suck!!" I couldn't help but laugh at what he did. I attempted to punch him, but he took a hold of my wrists.
"Hey relax! Have fun! This is probably the only time we get to have fun till we gotta go back to class!" He pulled me close and I wanted to run.
"I'm getting wet!!" I wiped my face.
"You think I'm not?"
I looked up at him and saw his beautiful eyes. I felt almost breathless. "No…"
He wiped a hair away from my eyes. "It's just water…"
"Mm-hmm…"
After at least…a good 20 seconds of staring, I felt him wrap his arms around my waist. Oblivious to everything, I put my arms around his neck and leaned up slowly. He was starting to lean down to me while pulling me closer to him. Suddenly, I felt something push my legs and his too.
"What the hell…?" He whispered.
I glanced down and saw two kids, no more than 5, pushing us. I gasped and stared at them. "What are you guys doing?"
"You have to move! You're stepping on our house!"
Van and I stared down at our feet and saw a huge circle drawn with chalk. There was a house in the middle.
"Oh gosh, we're sorry." I grinned. "We didn't see it."
"It's okay." They showed toothy smiles.
Van and I moved away, and I felt embarrassed. My cheeks were too pink for their own good and I could see his cheeks were light pink. He seemed to be staring at me and I felt very nervous under his gaze. My heart was beating loudly. I couldn't believe what we were about to do. That was the second time something was going to happen…
"Uh…" He started.
"Van…" I walked over to him.
"Yeah?" He asked quietly, looking at me.
"Um…" I blushed heavily. "This might not be the best time to tell you this…but…"
"What?"
"I'm cold."
His eyes widened. "Oh. Um…my clothes are wet too. You want to go back to the dorm and change?"
I suddenly felt shy. "Is it ok?"
"Yeah." He grinned. "I wanna change too."
Someway or another, that grin of his always made me feel so happy…even when I was at my worst, I'd feel content.
***
We walked together back to the school. "I had fun." I laughed. "Thank you."
He grinned. "Told you it'd be fun."
***
The next two days we enjoyed so much. We went anywhere we could and sometimes we played basketball or volleyball, but it was really fun. I had a great time. The only thing was I was afraid of what I was feeling towards him. It was only about 4 days since Allen and I broke up and already I was crushing on someone else.
We were walking back to the dorm and it was 9pm. The streets were fairly dark and I was getting cold. I shivered automatically and glanced at the houses. "You cold?" Van asked.
"I-I'm fine." I smiled up at him.
"You don't look it."
"It is cold, you know." I looked down.
Suddenly I felt his arm around my shoulders and pulled me close to him. "Feel better?"
I looked up and kissed his cheek. "Thank you."
It was almost hard to see the pink tint in his cheeks. "No problem."
***
We got to the dorm and we went up to my room first. "I'll see you tomorrow." Van grinned at me.
I blushed under his smile. "Ok. Thank you for today. I had fun."
"Yeah me too."
I fidgeted.
"Well…I'm going to go." He said.
I looked up and nodded. "Bye Van."
"Bye Hitomi."
The next thing I knew, he kissed me lightly on the cheek and left. I felt so hot and I almost didn't stop touching my cheek. His lips felt so…so wonderful on my skin…I couldn't help but wish that I would get to feel his lips on mine.
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