Disclaimer: The Lord of the Rings, and all its characters, races, and creatures, as well as our beloved Middle Earth, belongs to JRR Tolkien.
I am going to kill that Elf!
I just awoke and sat up in my bedroll. I glanced to the side of me expecting to see Legolas asleep where I left him the night before, and what do I find? An empty bedroll! No Elf! The bandage I had so carefully wrapped around his injury late last night is bundled into a ball and tossed to the end of the pallet, but the one who should be wearing it is nowhere to be seen. I suppose this means the truce is off?
"Ai!" Legolas shouted from the brush. "Sweet Eru!"
I closed my eyes. Were not these same words uttered not just yesterday morn?
I looked across the fire to where Gimli sat muttering and shaking his head. The look he had on his face told me that Legolas was indeed feeling much better today, and was in fact back to his same irritating self.
"I will not even rise to the Elf's bait again this morning. I have been the butt of one too many of his jests already," Gimli said with the air of a man in the throes of a massive headache.
"You think he is not really in trouble again?" I asked skeptically.
"He has been doing this sort of thing for the past hour already," Gimli insisted. "I am surprised he has not awoken you by now. In fact, I believe that to be his sole purpose, if you would ask my opinion of the whole affair."
Part of me wished to laugh at Gimli's silliness, but the larger part of me just wanted to cry. I had so liked the nice Elf I had been tending to, and now he was gone—replaced by that wicked Elf who vexed me to no end.
"I suppose an Elf could die, bitten by ten adders in the brush, and no one would come to his aid," Legolas said with a frown as he made his way toward the fire. He was indeed feeling better. I had never seen him in such an—Elven mood. I could not describe it in any other way. He was light on his feet. Not even a limp! He was beyond alert. His face literally shone. His expression screamed sharpness. It was as if everything about being an Elf had been renewed for him overnight.
I seriously needed to have some very deep discussions with Elrond once he was back in residence in Imladris. He had some extensive teaching on the intricacies of Elves to impart to me, that was apparent.
"Were an Elf indeed bitten by ten adders in the brush, he would not be needing any aid, for he would be beyond it!" Gimli said snidely to the grousing Elf. "It will please you, no doubt, that you have accomplished your goal of waking the lass, Legolas."
"It is about time she was up," he declared. "The morning grows old. Up with you, Naneth! See to yourself, so that we may be off. We've leagues to travel yet today."
"Do not call me that, Legolas," I said lamely. "I am not your mother."
"You objected not yesterday," Legolas said with a bit too much perkiness.
"Yesterday, you were sick and pathetic, with a face only a mother could love," I replied. "Today, you are vexing and obnoxious, with a face I am not sure anyone could love."
"Are we not crabby this morning, dear healer?" the Elf asked sarcastically.
"Well if I am, you have only yourself to blame for it," I told him. "I awake only to find you up on your leg before I have given you leave to be so. You have removed your bandage, and you are playing pranks on Gimli and waking me up after I toiled for hours over you yesterday and last night. I asked naught from you in return and what do I get but naught and less?"
I rose from my bed and gathered some clothes and my soap and a towel. I was going to clean myself up and try to improve my mood somewhat. Perhaps if I soaked my head in the river it would calm my urge to kill this blasted Elf.
It took me not long at all to get myself scrubbed and dried and clad in clean clothes. I made my way back up the slant of the Bruinen's bank and walked tiredly into the campsite. I could hardly believe my eyes as I beheld what was before me. The entire campsite was swept clean of our gear. Dori was saddled and bridled. She had been brushed, and from the looks of her satisfied expression, someone had given her some sort of treat that she liked. I usually brushed my hair out till it dried somewhat and then put it back up into its pins, but it appeared that Legolas was not going to give me the time to do so this morning. Besides, everything was packed up, and I felt not like unpacking it. I draped the wet towel in front of the saddle, intending to wash it later this evening when we camped for the night. My dirty clothes went into my bag reserved for such things, and I supposed I was ready, except for one very important thing—I had not gotten to have my morning tea. Woe is me.
I felt very much like I had the day after I had taken too much Valerian—extremely tired and unable to come fully awake. I was truly going to miss my morning tea. I gave Dori a pat as I took the reins and hefted myself into the saddle. As I settled both of my boots into the stirrups, and adjusted my seat, I noticed that Legolas was standing beside me, a steaming cup in his hands nestled within the pad in which I had served tea to him just last night.
"I believe you take it with lots of honey?" he asked with a genuine smile.
I took the cup eagerly, and thanked him profusely, almost gushing, I am sure, so grateful was I for such a wonderful gift.
"I am sorry if I am being vexing again today," he explained, "but since I spent the entire day abed yesterday, I find myself with an excess of energy." I heard Gimli stifle a curse of incredulity or some such thing beneath a thin disguise of a cough as Legolas leapt atop his horse. The Elf then urged the beast up next to a fallen log where Gimli could boost himself into place behind him. We walked our horses slowly while I sipped at my tea and savored every last drop.
"Legolas," I said, "I know I said this before, but thank you for the tea. You truly know not how much it means to me to have it this morning."
"Do me one favor," he said, in what appeared to be complete seriousness. "Simply remember this gesture when I become vexing, because half of the time, I know not what I have done to make you so angry."
I laughed. "I promise to try." I suddenly remembered the rolled-up bandage I had seen left on his bedroll.
"Legolas," I said skeptically, "is your injury truly healed so completely you need not even a small bandage any more?"
He glanced at me and said, "Yes, it truly is. There is a scab, if you must know, and it is a bit sore. But it does not cause me to limp, as you could plainly see for yourself. However, after a few hours on horseback, I imagine it will stiffen, and I will limp for a while once we stop; at least until I work the stiffness out once again. The swelling is almost completely down—these are the leggings you cut yesterday—I sewed them up while you slept; my boot is a little more snug than usual, but not perilously bad. I will watch it to make sure it does not swell unduly. I am fine, and I thank you for your healing and your continued concern."
"And I thank you for a thorough report," I answered with a smile. My was he wordy this morning. "Now I will not bother you about it again." At his sideways skeptical look I added, "I promise!" He simply smiled.
I finished my tea and stowed the cup in one of my bags. Legolas kicked up his beautiful Elven horse and I did the same to Dori, and we rode without stopping till well past the noon hour. It was so beautiful here, on this side of Middle Earth. So lush and green near the Bruinen, and yes, we could still hear the Loudwater call. This type of countryside was so foreign to me, compared with the grasslands of Rohan; the golden grasses that rolled as a sea in the never ceasing wind over the plain. I put the thoughts from my mind. Even among all of this beauty, thoughts of my home left my heart bereft for the sight of it.
We stopped about mid afternoon, much to my happiness. I was definitely flagging. I was not even aware of it, so caught up in the rhythm of the ride was I; until I felt two different arms steady me, even though our pace had not slowed. I suddenly became more alert, and realized that Legolas and Gimli both were bracing me in my saddle, and as soon as I knew I had almost fallen, I quickly righted myself, shrugged out of their grasp and slowly brought Dori completely to a halt.
"I suppose that is my clue that I need to stop and rest, is it not?" I asked, embarrassed. "I am sorry to slow us down so much. I know not what is wrong with me."
"Could it have something to do with you acting as a healer all of yesterday and most of the night, then not being allowed to get all the sleep you required—not to mention being with child—as well as not having been allowed to eat a meal at a regular time?" Gimli demanded, growing louder as he aimed his tirade at the Elf seated in front of him on the horse.
Legolas was down off his mount before Gimli was even finished berating him for all his sins against me, and had his Elven hands around my waist, helping me from Dori's back. He steadied me as he walked me toward a stand of trees, and he helped me sit against the trunk of one of them.
"I could help you lie down, if you would prefer," he said with such concern I almost laughed.
"No," I said shakily. "I will be fine. In fact, just bring me something from the pack horse, and let me eat a bit, and I'll be ready to ride in just a few minutes. No need to fuss."
He didn't answer me. He stood and returned to where the horses were, holding out his arm to help Gimli down from the horse where he was perched. Gimli came over to where I was sitting, bearing one of the bags containing some of the food. He began sorting through it, offering me different choices. The choices were becoming fewer. We had been on the journey for over three weeks now, but I could still choose from apples, pears, a small assortment of nuts and three and a half strips of dried venison. I chose a pear, a strip of the dried meat and all of the nuts. So they could call me a hog, I cared not. Too bad. I was hungry and on the verge of collapse. I topped it off with water from my water skin and felt immensely better for having had the meal, truth be known.
"Well, sirs," I said as I rose, "I'm ready to ride. How about the two of you?"
"I am not ready," Legolas said.
"I am not either," Gimli added.
"Why not?" I asked suspiciously. "You are simply sitting there; you aren't doing anything else. Why aren't we leaving?"
"I am just not ready yet," Legolas said again.
"Neither am I," Gimli echoed.
"What is going on?" I asked. "If you two are doing this because you think I cannot sit a horse any longer, you are both wrong. Now come on. Get up and let us be on our way."
"I am not ready to go!" Legolas said, sounding irate. "Now sit down over there and quit making so much noise!"
"Legolas!" Gimli yelled. "I agreed that we should rest here for a few hours, but I have had enough of your mouth! I know not what gives you the idea that you may speak to Maeren in any way that you choose, but you may not—not in my presence you may not!"
Valar no! It couldn't be! Not the ridiculous weeping again!
I turned myself around and fled to where I could hear the Bruinen calling the most loudly. I didn't run. I could barely even walk, blinded as I was by my tears. I was soon far enough into the trees, and near the river for comfort, and I lay myself down to cry my heart out. I was so desperately tired and everything seemed so wrong right now. We were all of a sudden shouting at each other, I felt so horrible, and I was missing my home again. I knew that most of my melancholy was simply brought on by the stress of yesterday, and the overwhelming fatigue that I felt. Just given time and the venting of a few of these tears, and all would be right again. I knew it. I just had to get through this, that was all.
It did not take long before I was asleep. I really know not how long I actually slept, but the shadows were lengthening when I finally awoke. And I wasn't alone. Legolas was sitting right beside me. He had his boots flat on the ground, his legs forming a bridge from his feet to his hips on the ground, and his arms were resting on his knees. He somehow knew I was awake, but I know not how-I'd opened my eyes for only a second. Perhaps he noticed the difference in my breathing.
"I am sorry for shouting at you, Maeren," he said quietly. "I truly did not mean to make you cry. You see, I felt guilty for waking you up this morning and pushing you so hard and making you miss your meals today. So what did I do? I took it out on the one I am guilty of harming. One of my many faults."
The Elf was humbling himself? And to me?
I opened my eyes, and since I was lying on my side, I looked up at him. His face was serious, and though he wasn't exactly frowning, he did have a little furrow between his brows, as if he was puzzled by something.
"What exactly do you want from me, Legolas?" I asked tiredly. For some reason I felt as if there was more to this than just a need for a simple confession.
"I only want your forgiveness," he replied, "that is all."
"Something confuses you, though," I said almost in accusation. "Just say what is on your mind. Stop walking on tiptoes. It is you who is liable to bite among our group, not me."
"What confuses me," he said in all earnestness, "is your ability to weep in an instant. One moment you are fine, the next you are crying. I have never witnessed anything like it before. It is worrisome. I like it not. It confuses me, and more importantly—it scares me, and nothing much scares me. That angers me even more!"
I started laughing then, though it was a weak attempt and it didn't last long. I found my melancholia had not totally lifted after all. Probably only a night's rest was going to banish it completely.
"Legolas," I began in explanation, "let me first tell you that whether you believe it or not, I am not a weeper by nature. I weep at the regular events—births, deaths, that sort of thing. However, when a woman is with child, something occurs within her body that changes her. She weeps easily and often. However, most healers—which I remind you are for the most part men—say it is simply emotion wrought by the newness of the condition and the drastic change in the appearance in the woman's body. Her body grows huge and misshapen and she sees herself as ugly and is afraid her husband will not love her that way. The healers also say that the fear of the pain of the birth itself has the woman on edge, causing her to be near to tears at all times. Another favorite is that she fears she will not make a good mother and likewise this causes her emotions to bubble over.
"I can see how these ideas might make sense for first time mothers, but this sort of thing happens to a woman every single time she is with child. After a woman has six children, she no longer cares if her husband finds her beautiful or not! He obviously does, or she would not be in the condition she is in! These explanations are too simple; they make no sense to me, for while childbirth is no walk in the garden, I have been through it before, and know what to expect, yet here I am weeping about something that ordinarily I would yell back at you for. No, it is not fear or any such thing that makes a women that is with child weep. I know not what it is yet, but one day, healers will know, and it won't be something stupid such as what they think now."
I glanced at Legolas and was surprised at the look of genuine interest he had on his face. For once I had said more than one consecutive sentence, and he hadn't gone glassy-eyed with disinterest before I was less than half way through with the statement. As I sat there watching him, I saw his gaze shift—directly to where my baby was playing within my body. I decided to take a chance with the Elf, a huge chance, since he already thought me of loose character, but if his curiosity was truly Elven—and I knew that it was—he would not be able to resist.
I sat completely upright, and crossed my legs, inching just a bit closer to the Elf at my side. I took one of his hands from atop one of his knees. He gave me just the token amount of resistance, but not much of which to speak.
"Trust me," I said. I placed his hand over the swell of my abdomen, just as the baby made a dash beneath it. Legolas' eyes grew wide, and his lips parted slightly in awe. His gaze darted to mine as the baby turned quickly again within me.
"That is amazing," he breathed. "How can you think of anything else, with all of that happening within you?"
"When one stops to think of it, it is truly amazing, is it not?" I asked. "Unfortunately, over time, one gets used to it. There are times, as the baby grows larger that it can become rather painful. The baby decides to take a nap in a particular place that sends shooting pain down the leg or through the lower back. And when it gets on toward the time when the baby is due to be born, and there is hardly any room for it to maneuver anymore, the baby cares not. He continues to play and swim, using elbows and knees—quite roughly at times. Sleep becomes but a fleeting memory for the mother-to-be."
Legolas laughed and removed his hand from my stomach.
"Thank you for allowing me to feel that," he said sincerely. "After my being rude to you, you can still be kind to me. Why do you vex me so, Maeren? I wish I knew the answer to my question."
"I wish I knew it, too," I replied. "Then I would not do whatever it is. I wish not to be yelled at any more."
Legolas stood and held out his hands to me, to help me rise as well. As soon as I had, he did not relinquish his hold on them; he pulled me into his arms for a moment, and gave me a hug. To say I was surprised would be putting it mildly.
Into my ear he said quietly, "I know a mere embrace cannot take away the hurt that I cause; it is but a small token of gratitude for all you have done for me. I hope you accept it, and try not to think too ill of me. I truly am a good person—to everyone else but you, I am sorry to say. I am very sorry to say." He drew back and gave me a sad smile. But as quickly as the sad smile had come, it was gone, replaced by a mischievous grin with a gleam in his eyes to match.
"Now," he said, as he grabbed my hand and began leading me back to where we had been a few hours ago. "We are stopping for the rest of the day. Gimli and I will be taking care of you." He held up a hand at my protest, silencing me before I could even utter a word. "You are to rest, or to read, or to bathe—anything you wish to do. If you prefer to help us or whatever it is you want to do, you may do it. No matter what it is."
I could not believe my ears! Not only were we stopping, I could sleep for the rest of the day and the night as well if I chose. I could have twenty cups of tea, if I thought that I could hold them all, and not wear myself out answering Mother Nature's calls all the night long!
Oh, the possibilities.
o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o
The first order of business, was to see to my sweet Dori. I had neglected her for far too long. I needn't have worried, however. Dori had been freed of her tack, brushed and set free with the other two horses, and they were all three happily grazing on the sweet grass that grew all around this lush countryside. My gear had been stowed to one side as it always was, and I could move it wherever I would want to, whenever I got to it. Gimli was seated at the small fire smoking his pipe, and he gave me a warm smile as I came walking into the clearing.
"Gimli," I said, "I am sorry for being so cranky. It is simply fatigue; that is all."
"Think nothing of it, lass," my sweet Dwaven friend said kindly. "I only hope you gave that Elf the tongue lashing he deserved before you brought him back here, that is all."
"Believe it or not, Gimli," I said confidentially as I sat down beside him, "he gave one to himself."
Gimli's feigned stunned expression was laughable and something told me it wasn't entirely feigned.
"Tis hard to believe, to be sure," Gimli stated as he started to smile. "But I have seen you work a bit of magic on that lad a time or two in the past few days, so it is not entirely surprising me to hear you say such a thing."
I laughed at his words and rose once again.
"Legolas told me I could do exactly as I wished," I said skeptically. "Was he telling me truthfully?"
"That he was, my dear," Gimli affirmed. "Anything your dear heart desires. Your wishes are our commands."
"Hmmm," I mumbled. "I will give this some thought while I go soak my head once again in the Loudwater. Perhaps it can clear some more of the cobwebs out from between my ears. My mind has not been very clear today and I like it not at all."
I went to my bags and rummaged through my clothes. Along with clean under things, I chose a nightdress, of all things. I ached for comfort that these leggings just could not give me this evening. I actually chose two - one would have been too thin, and I wanted not to be thought of as anything other than proper. They were plain, white, simple, billowy dresses, with short sleeves and round necklines and no waistlines, and they would hang to my ankles. I dug further within my bag for some clean stockings, and my shoes for a change. Comfort. What a relief. I gathered the rest of my bathing items and fled to the river, and was gone for quite a long while, compared to the length of time it usually took me. I had gotten quite used to the idea that I had an audience for the most basic of functions. In fact, I had ceased to think about it anymore. It would do me no good. I would only get angry and it would change nothing. Somewhat like beating an already dead horse—useless.
When I finally made my way back to the campsite, the sun was still a bit above the horizon, and Legolas and Gimli had something for supper—which on closer inspection, turned out to be two large hares—roasting over the fire. I stowed my bath items, hung up my towel and spread my bedroll close to the fire. My hair was wet, and I was still a bit chilled from the coldness of the Bruinen. I fetched my comb and sat myself down on my bed and began to comb through the tangles in my hair. Every once in a while, I would have to set down the comb and work a knot out with my fingers. My hair was thick and the knots it tangled into could be formidable indeed.
After I had set down my comb for perhaps the tenth time, Legolas sat down beside me, and slapped my hands gently away from the knot I was working with. I frowned at him, but he smiled at me, and began working at the knot in my hair. It didn't take him nearly the amount of time to work through it than it had been taking me to untangle the others I had been working with, so when he took up my comb, I didn't protest. He ran the comb gently through my hair, stopping before he would come to a knot, then working the tangle free, and continuing with the combing, until my entire head would allow the passage of the comb without complaint. He handed the comb back to me and I thanked him. He got up and returned to the roasting hares. Gimli smiled at me, as if to tell me I was working miracles with this blasted Elf, I suppose. I sat there steeped in the warmth of the fire, and thankful that the mood of our group had turned from quarrelsome back to amicable. I could handle amicable while I was tired. I had proved this afternoon, that I could not handle quarrelsome in my present state of fatigue.
"Legolas," I said, "before the light is completely gone, I would like to see your leg where the adder bit you yesterday."
He looked at me from the corner of one eye. "You promised you would not ask me about it again," he said. "You would go back on your word?"
"You did not mean what you said when you told me that I could do anything I wished?" I asked. "This is what I wish."
"So now you would use guilt on me?" he asked accusingly. That familiar sting he used when speaking to me when I irritated him was just on the fringes of the words he spoke. It seemed as if I was using that elusive 'vexing' way I had about me again, but for the life of me, I still could not pinpoint just exactly what it was I was doing to provoke him—besides being alive and on Middle Earth.
"I am using no guilt," I declared. "Earlier this afternoon, I gave you a glimpse of my small miracle. I thought you may like to share with me the mystery of your Elven healing, which to me is quite a bit more than just a small miracle. As a healer it is a phenomenon that muddles my mind. I do not understand it and never will. That is why I ask this of you. Not to force guilt on you, or to have some kind of power over you. Only to satisfy a fraction of my curiosity of the mystery of Elves."
Legolas closed his eyes momentarily, then opened them again, giving me a look that was almost a plea for my forgiveness. Instead of apologizing needlessly, however, Legolas sat down beside me once again, and began tugging at his boot. He had it off in short order, not at all going through the song and dance Gimli and I had to go through to accomplish its removal yesterday morning. He then pushed his leggings up his leg until the bite mark—or the vague mark that was left—was visible. He turned the back of his leg toward me, so I could get a better look. I peered down at it, and ran my index finger along scab, that flaked off as I touched it, revealing a faint white scar beneath it. I shook my head at the wonder of it. His leg was lean and muscled as it always was. I pressed my fingertip into the muscle for a few seconds and not a dent remained. No hint of swelling in it at all. It defied all reason. Miraculous.
"Thank you, Legolas," I said. "I simply would not have believed it had I not witnessed it myself. An adder bite has a man out of action for at least three weeks, and that is if there are absolutely no complications. Say he was bitten and his leg had to be drained, as yours did; it would be a month at least before he could again be back to his work, whatever his work happened to be. When I said last night that the draining would have immediate results, I had no idea that with Elves it would be that immediate. I meant that perhaps by this evening your leg may be half the size it was last night. That is why it frustrated me so to find you up and about this morning without my leave. And now, it is completely healed. It is beyond all my rational thought."
The Elf began lowering his leggings back into place and replacing his boot back on his foot.
Surprising me again, he placed his forehead against mine and said quietly, "I will not ask your forgiveness again, just know that it is silently asked for at all times that I hurt you. You deserve so much better than what I give you. If you decide to sever what small amount of friendship we have, I would not blame you. You have every right to.
"Yet think not that I will not protect you with my life should you need it. And I say that not only because you carry Aragorn's child. At one time that would have been the only reason I would have done so. Now I do it out of love for you. You vex me unbelievably at times; I just want to shake you. But you have my heart nonetheless. You are a remarkable person, and I would be honored to count you among my friends, but I would understand were you to not return the honor."
I took his face in my hands and turned it so that I could place a kiss on one of his cheeks.
"Legolas," I said sincerely, "I have tried several times to describe our relationship to myself, and I have been unable to. I love you—I hate you. I know not which it is. It is both at times, I believe. I have decided that we are as oil and water; we do not mix, we simply exist side by side. That need not mean we must be at war with one another, but neither does it mean we must adore one another either. I suspect we will continue to vex and yell at each other, but as long as we do not allow it to degenerate into something ugly and prolonged, we will be all right with each other. And possibly, if we could perhaps find something humorous in our disagreements, we may be better able to diffuse some of the more spiteful situations, do you not agree somewhat with these ideas?"
"I believe they have merit," he replied. "I am ready to try anything at this point, Maeren. I feel very ashamed of myself for the way that I treat you, but even feeling this way does not stop me from doing it. I fear I need counsel with Lord Elrond, or at the very least with my father, the King." This last statement was delivered by the Elf with such dismay that I wanted to laugh, but I dared not to. He was so serious and had meant what he said so profoundly, that I just could not do such a thing.
I was saved from trying to think of what exactly to say, when Gimli announced that our feast was at hand. Praise be for Dwarves with excellent timing! I knew not what to say to Legolas after his last comment, and truthfully, I was afraid to open my mouth for fear I would burst out laughing.
It was unusual to have Gimli serving the two of us. It was usually Legolas who would hunt, and for the most part, prepare and serve the meals. Gimli and I would clean up afterward, and we usually set up the camp and broke it down to depart as well. This had been an uncommon day from all perspectives.
Gimli doled out generous portions of the meat to each of us, and we all ate with relish—well Gimli and I did. I think that Legolas never ate with anything but polished finesse. I wondered to myself if his mother ever used a bib when she fed him when he was an infant. I was convinced that if I took much time trying to figure out the inner workings of Elves, that I would be rendered senseless by the attempt. Trying to decipher Elves was just too much to ask of one Human brain.
As soon as we were finished, Gimli and Legolas began to clear away the remains of our meal. I started to rise to help, but they both threw a small fit, so I remained seated on my bedroll. It wasn't long before I removed my shoes and curled up on my side beneath my blanket, just watching the fire and listening to my friends as they bantered back and forth while they set the camp to rights for the night.
My friends. Gimli was well and truly my friend. Was Legolas? I still wasn't sure. He was a sort of person one looked for in a friend. All you had to do was look into his face and see it. It was definitely there. He was loyal, kind, generous—all the things people would want in a friend. Only he couldn't find it within his heart to give those things to me. It was puzzling why he could not manage to do so. Well, I liked him well enough, but it certainly would not break my heart, nor would I pine away for want of his friendship, so I would not spend any more time trying to figure it out. It was simply a puzzle, that's all. A very silly puzzle.
I reluctantly sat up - nature was calling me, and if I did not heed the call now, I would have to wake from a sound sleep to do so later. I put my shoes back on and walked a short distance into the brush. I found an appropriate spot and dropped my drawers, so to speak, did my business, and just as I was about to make my way back to the clearing of our campsite, I heard a low growl from somewhere behind me. I felt the hair on the back of my neck rise, and the skin tingle there as well. I stood still as a stone, not daring to move. Surely Gimli or Legolas saw me leave the campsite. I always took it for granted that they followed me wherever I went; they had done so since the very first day. If they had, why were they not doing something about whatever it was that was growling at me from a few feet away?
I wanted to run, but knew that was exactly the wrong thing to do. Prey ran away from the hunter. If I wanted to be caught, running was what I should do. I forced myself to stand there and shake. I had begun to tremble with the fright of it all, unable to stop myself no matter how many times I tried to make myself be calm. I could actually hear stealthy footfalls of whatever it was that was stalking me now. It stopped once again, emitting another low eerie growl. I wanted to shout for my comrades, but of this I was not so sure. Should I be quiet, or should I make noise? Would it scare the beast away, or would it scare it into attacking me? I squeezed my eyes shut and began to pray to the Valar for deliverance from whatever fell beast this predator was.
Then suddenly, there were yellow eyes gleaming a short distance away. It was fairly dark out by now, but the moon was three quarters full and cast quite a bit of light. It was a large wolf, and I fancied I could see its fangs drip as its mouth hung open hungrily, waiting to make a meal of me. It kept its yellow eyes trained on me, but I know not why it simply stood there and stared at me. Not that I was complaining about it, other than the uncertainty was irritating. If it was going to harm me, I would just as soon it attack as continue to draw the suspense out this way.
It seemed to suddenly decide to do just that. It got a determined look in its eyes and lowered its head. Its growl became fierce and it began at first walking toward me. Its speed increased rapidly and at the last moment it took a huge leap—
I closed my eyes and screamed, dropping as I did so, and I covered my head with my hands. I thanked the Valar for all I had been given in my life, and asked them to watch over my father and brothers, and all the friends I had been blessed with—perhaps even Legolas—
The next thing I knew I was being held in strong arms, and I was weeping and holding on to Legolas for dear life. Gimli was suddenly right beside me, and before I knew it, Legolas had lifted me up and was carrying me back to the campsite. He sat upon my bedroll, with me still in his arms, and he cradled me and rocked me as I wept hysterically.
"Lass, it is all right now, sweetheart," I heard Gimli croon, "twas a wolf, but Legolas shot it through the heart with an arrow. You are safe now, my dear."
Legolas said nothing, but he held me tightly, and it was just the comfort I needed.
"Gimli," I heard Legolas say, "could you make her a cup of tea? I think that would help. She usually likes that, you know."
"That is a good idea, lad," I heard Gimli answer. "I will get right to it." And I heard Gimli begin to make my liquid comfort. What wonderful friends I have—both of them.
I finally had control of myself somewhat, and I lifted my head, wiping my eyes on the backs of my hands.
"It seems all I can do today is weep, does it not?" I asked shakily, with a weak laugh. It felt strange sitting so familiarly in the Elf's lap this way. Then I had an irritating thought.
"I mean not to be ungrateful, but—what took you so long?" I asked almost whining.
Legolas laughed lightly at my tone, I believe.
"I am sorry about that, Maeren," he replied, "but the wolf was a female with cubs, and I hated to kill her unless I was certain she was going to harm you. Please believe me—I had the situation under control at all times. I know you did not know that, and I am very sorry for the fright that it caused you. I wanted to avoid having to kill the cubs as well. They will not survive on their own. They will be too young to do so, and to leave them alive would be cruel. I truly had only good intentions in waiting to fire upon the wolf."
"I mean not to doubt you," I said with a great deal of doubt, "but how in Valar's name could you tell in the dark it was female, much less that it had cubs?"
"Elven mystery again, Maeren," he replied. "My eyesight is very good in the dark. Her body hung low to the ground; she was obviously nursing cubs."
I couldn't help myself, I put my arms around his waist again. Thinking about that wolf leaping at me, brought shivers up and down my spine once more, and I needed the solid comfort of someone to hold.
"I am sorry for complaining, Legolas, and for doubting you," I said sincerely. "Thank you for saving my life. There is no doubt, that wolf would have killed me had you not been there with your bow."
He tightened his hold on me once again, and replied, "I told you before, I will protect you with my life, and I meant it. You have nothing to fear as long as you are with me. Nothing at all."
Gimli had my tea ready, and was asking me how much honey to instill in it. Legolas relinquished his hold on me, scooting over and making room for me to sit up on my own. I took the cup of hot honeyed tea from Gimli, thanking him profusely. I sipped and savored the beverage as if it was the finest of expensive wines ever offered, and to me, it was better. I was finally beginning to relax somewhat.
"How will you find the cubs in the dark?" I asked Legolas as I drank from my cup. "More Elven mystery?"
"I suppose you would think so," he replied. "I will find her track leading away from her body. Ithil is three-quarters, and provides good light for tracking. Wolf scent is not hard to discern, then I have simply to listen for their little voices. It should not take me long."
"Makes me sad," I declared bleakly, "though I well understand the need for it. They cannot be allowed to starve to death."
When the cup was empty, Gimli held his hand out to me, to take my empty cup, and I smiled and gave it to him, bowing my head to him in thanks. Legolas patted the bedroll, inviting me to lay myself down and get comfortable, which I did; I was fast beginning to flag. I lay flat on my back, with Legolas sitting right by my head, and he began to idly stroke my hair. I somehow got the feeling that perhaps the wolf coming after me may have scared the Elf a bit more than he had let on.
"Gimli," I heard Legolas say, "look." I saw him gesture with his head down toward me.
What on Middle Earth was the Elf up to now?
"What, you crazy Elf?" Gimli asked, somewhat perturbed.
"Look at Maeren's stomach," Legolas said with more firmness.
"Yes?" Gimli said. "So?"
"Come closer, you nearsighted Dwarf," Legolas laughed, "and Maeren will show you something amazing."
"Truly, Gimli," I piped in, "What Legolas is saying is true. I have something amazing to show you."
Gimli sighed hugely and shook his head. "I am very tired, you two. I feel not like playing any games, so this had better be good!"
"Trust us, it is," Legolas said, grinning widely.
Gimli walked around the fire and sat beside me. "All right, I am here. Where is this show I am needing to attend?"
I flattened my back against my bedroll, and smoothed the wrinkles out of my nightdresses. My stomach was not huge by any means yet, and one had to look closely to see the baby as it moved, but it could be done if you looked long enough. I only hoped the child would cooperate this time. We were soon rewarded when my baby swam through my womb, causing a ripple effect over my abdomen. Gimli's lips parted and he uttered a small gasp. I could not resist his awe, so I took his hand, and placed it on my belly, just as I had done with Legolas' earlier today. He was very skeptical at first, wondering if it was proper, I am sure. I would not let his hand go, and made him let me place it where I would. The look of awe on his face brought tears to my eyes once again.
"Maeren!" he gasped, "the wonder of it all!"
"See?" Legolas said, all grins. "Aragorn's child moves within her all the time." Legolas leaned over and placed his hand next to Gimli's glancing at my face, with his eyebrows raised, asking permission belatedly, I suppose. I simply smiled and nodded my head, finding joy in their wonder over such a small thing—something I took for granted, but to the Elves, at least, was something that was rarer than rare to them.
We stayed gathered together in this way for several minutes; I flat on my back, with an Elf and a Dwarf leaning over my belly, hands touching my body hoping to catch fleeting movements of the child within me.
I wondered what Aragorn would say if he could see us here now. Had he any idea what an uproar we had inadvertently caused among his friends—especially among the Elves? Somehow, I thought he probably did not. And he most assuredly would not believe his eyes were he to witness this scene, as it was displayed at this moment in time.
I unsuccessfully stifled a huge yawn, and Gimli was the first to remove his hand. He swatted Legolas' hand away from me, and helped me straighten my blanket out. He then actually tucked me in! Before leaving me for the night, he bent and kissed my cheek.
"Lass, that was as close to losing you as I ever wish to get," he said gruffly. "Do not be scaring me that way ever again!"
"You have my word, Gimli," I said sincerely. "The next time I have a wolf at my beck and call, I will tell it to leave me be and not attack. Will that suit you, dear friend?"
"That suits me, lass," he said, with tears in his eyes. He gave my arm one last pat and rose. He and Legolas had a quiet conversation across the campsite from me, then Gimli found his bedroll, and with surprising speed and deftness, rolled himself up in it and seemed to sleep almost in one moment.
I was not long behind him, I knew, but in the back of my mind, I was still fearful. I had this feeling that something was going to leap out at me when I least expected it. I liked it not at all. I am not usually a person given to irrational fear, although nearly being eaten by a ferocious wolf could hardly be classified as being irrational, I do not believe. It seems that Legolas sensed that I was still afraid. He was soon by my side, crouched next to me. He had his bow in hand, and his quiver strapped on. He was going to find the poor little wolf cubs.
"Fear not, Maeren," he said kindly. "Gimli sleeps loudly, it is true, but he does sleep lightly when he is the only one left as protection. And he is quite formidable with his axe. You have not seen him in action, and I am not sure you truly want to.A fierce warrior he is, have no doubt about it. I will be back soon, and I promise to watch over you. Have no fear. Sleep soundly and peacefully. The small swimmer needs you to rest."
I smiled. "Thank you again, Legolas. You are a true friend."
His smile widened at my words, and I knew then that we had finally reached a goal we had both been striving for—true friendship between us. Yes, we would vex and irritate each other, without doubt. He would yell at me, and I would probably yell back and weep again, truth be known. But I believe that deep down, we both now knew that we were well and truly friends.
Friends. Whoever would have thought? Legolas and Maeren are friends.
Miracles do happen.
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