Title: Single Turn, Lifes Regrets Part 2 (MAJOR SEASON SEVEN SPOILERS)
Author: Lynds
Author's Note: This is out later than I thought I was hoping yesterday it
could have been out but stuff happens and I couldn't so I got it out a day
late. Thank you; Jewel! You are the best for your nagging that gets me
writing and for your kind words! Kiosha, Mary thank you for helping me with
ideas and checking it over for me. Claire, Lydia, FAITH, Magy, Court, Kylie
and EVERYONE else...Thank you for the feedback. I got quite a bit and
that's probably why this piece came together so quickly....So thank you.
Hope you all enjoy this part..It's short again but I could have it out
quick..... One more thing, did very quick POV change and that's what &&&&
is for.
Summary: Season 7 spoilers....Summary in the 1st part...
Disclamier: Don't own them.
Dedication: Jewel.........Here ya go, thanks for the kind words it was very
sweet and this next piece is all for you! Enjoy it and I promise since you
said you'd write, I'll write more for part 3 very very soon! here ya go!
"Single Turn, Lifes Regrets" Part 2
Lindsay's POV
I stood there half asleep and yes a little hungover and my soon to be ex-
husband is in front of me. I had to wipe my eyes more than once, I thought
I was crazy. Not only did I see him, well I thought I did but he was
wearing those navy blue pajamas. Okay, Lindsay shut up, you're not to think
that anymore about him.
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Great, I'm here now what the hell am I supposed to do? Think Donnell,
think! I feel her eyes on me and I don't really like it. Well okay the fact
I'm still in my pajamas might have some reasoning to it, but still. Didn't
she learn staring was impolite? Well if she didn't she should, I don't want
my son staring at people all the time, think of what it would do to their
self - esteem. Bobby, you're here to talk to her not talk about staring and
pajamas, now do something! I kept hearing that little mean voice in my head
telling me that over and over. Oh, don't you hate that voice!
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I reached out and hit his chest just to make sure he was real.
"Ow!" I heard him scream and he wobbled a little. Yup, it was him alright!
"I'm sorry."
"I know you're mad at me but physical abuse?" He spoke a little too loudly.
"I didn't know if it was really you. I was just making sure." I spoke still
sleeping, well not really but I wish!
"No, it's a stranger Lindsay, of course it's me!" He was getting upset at
me! He's the one that should be on his knees begging me to take him back. I
had to smile at that picture. "Why are you smiling?" He spoke, his voice
softer.
"No reason. Why are you here?" I snapped back to reality and looked at him,
my arms crossed my chest.
"I love you." I rolled my eyes and turned to walk inside. "I know you love
me too." I laughed to myself. First he takes my trust I have for him from
me and now he's telling me things he thinks I know. I turned to face him
and walked right up to him.
"You know?" I said rather loudly. He nods his head, he looks so frightened
of me, like I'd hurt him. Well, don't think I haven't though about it
because I have.
"Yes."
"And how the hell do you know I love you?" I was beyond mad now, and I
didn't care about my raised voice. He stepped toward me. "Back off Bobby!
Back off!" I pushed him away and I was already in tears. It was amazing how
just looking at him made me cry, I was supposed to hate him for what he
did, he was supposed to be the last in my mind but I felt for him so much,
I still love him. NO! Lindsay, NO! I have to stop. I can't go down that
road again I know what happened last time and I'm not hurting myself or my
son anymore. I need to do this, I am doing the right thing. Good girl, keep
saying that Lindsay and you'll be okay.
"If you didn't love me you wouldn't be in tears right now for practically
no reason. If you didn't love me you wouldn't have opened that door to let
me in. If you didn't love me you wouldn't be standing here still listening
to me and if you didn't love me you wouldn't be wearing my clothes or your
wedding rings." He pointed to my left hand. Damn that man! Can't hide
anything from him. I tried to hold back a grin and pulled a stong front on.
"Well, maybe I opened the door because I wanted to and I'm standing here
because I didn't feel like sleeping and maybe I'm in your clothes because I
don't have my pajamas packed yet, maybe they're still at your home! Maybe I
am wearing my rings because I haven't had time to take them off. Maybe I am
upset because the man I've devoted my life to forever has been unfaithful
and I can't trust him, and it hurts so much because I *loved* him!" I was
screaming at him now and I didn't mean too. It just happened. I looked at
him and I saw tears in his eyes too. We stood there in silence before I
heard the neighbors yelling at us to shut up.
"Guess your mom's neighbors don't want to hear our argument." He tried to
make light of the moment. That's Bobby for you.
"Guess not. Look maybe we could finish this in the hall inside?" Why are
you doing this. Rule number one: You don't have a conversation about love
with the man you're divorcing. Rule number two: You don't then invite him
into your home. Okay two rules Lindsay so far and you've broken them both.
Nice job!We walked inside and stood by the large staircase. I leaned
against it for support I thought for sure my knees would give in. "Now what
is the real reason you came here for?" I lowered my voice now being in the
house I didn't want to wake the baby.
"I went to see dad today."
"Congradulations. Tell him this failed marriage was all my fault?"
"No, of course not. It wasn't all your fault."
"Oh yeah right. I forgot." My voice was bitter.
"Linds, it wasn't. We both weren't working on keeping our marriage
together. Dad knows that. And Linds, it was mostly my fault." I looked up
at him and saw the pain and hurt in his eyes.
"Bobby." I sighed. "It wasn't all your fault, but let's not argue about
this. What's done is done."
"Is it?" I looked at him, what was he thinking.
"What?"
"Is it done? Is there anything we can do Lindsay?" I was so hoping that
question wasn't going to come up.
"Of course we could do something, but I'd end up being hurt all over, you
would and our son would. I'm not willing to risk that."
"So there is nothing we can do? We're really going through with the
divorce?" He was crying. Bobby and the damn tears, how could that not pain
me? I did the only thing I could think about and I walked to him and hugged
him. I felt his warm ams around me. They, weren't the arms of the man I
knew and loved though. Instead of giving me strength they needed strength.
We cried in each other's arms, finally I pulled back and looked at him. I
did love him, I couldn't deny that. But he hurt me, and I couldn't trust
him. I couldn't stay with a man I don't trust.
"I don't know Bobby. I can't trust you, I've lost that trust. You took that
trust away, and I can't be with a man I no longer trust in." I was crying
too.
"Can you.... do.. do you think that trust will ever come back?" He could
barely speak, I'd never seen Bobby like this.
"I don't know. It's too soon, I don't know."
"If it's too soon, why the divorce?" I looked into his eyes. Again, I had
no answer.
"Because you slept with another woman. You committed adultery, and I've
lost all my trust for you."
"But can't you hold off on the divorce, just wait."
"Wait for what Bobby? To change my mind? What suddenly overnight my mind
will change?" I was getting angry again.
"No, but maybe you and I could see someone, maybe we can get help, fix
this." I shook my head.
"No, no. You only want help now that you've had your little fun with that
little slut! That's all you cared about, you got what you wanted and now
only now you want to fix this mess! NO!" I walked to the front door and
opened it only to be stopped again. This time by the minature Bobby.
"Mommy." He was at the top of the staircase rubbing his eyes. I looked up
and also saw Bobby look up at him. "Daddy!" He screamed and toddled down
the stairs to Bobby. With open arms on both boys I saw them each run to
each other. Bobby picked our son up and held him in his arms. For the
millionth time that night, I saw his eyes fill with tears. Look what he had
done to not only me, but our son too. Our family. Because of his infedelity
our whole family was hurting.
"Hey sport. What are you doing up?" That's when I interjected. I walked
over and reached for my son.
"Yes, what are you doing up?" I lifted him into my arms and started to walk
upstairs.
"I woked up, and looked for you but you wasn't there." I kissed his head
and pushed some of the hair out of his eyes.
"I'm sorry baby, I was just talking to daddy." My son turned back to his
father and reached his arms out to him.
"Daddy." I looked at Bobby and he walked towards me.
"Little guy, I have to go, I just came to say good night to mommy and to
tell her I loved her." I was looking into his eyes and I knew he wasn't
lying. I smiled a little and turned my focus back to my son.
"Come on, give daddy a kiss and then it's time to go to bed." He jumped
down from my embrace and ran into his father's arms. It pained me to see
this.
"Love you daddy." Bobby kissed our son's forehead and then his nose and
hugged him. Little Bobby's arms clung around his father's neck.
"Love you so much little guy. I'll see you soon okay?" My son nodded with a
little smile.
"Pwomise?"
"of course, I just have to go for now okay?"
"Otay. Love you."
"I love you too." He walked to me and put our son in my arms.
"I'm going to put him to bed."
"Yeah, I should get going. I'm sorry I came over tonight."
"I'm not." And I meant it. I smiled a little to him and he smiled back.
"Well, I'll be over tomorrow to come get you."
"Thanks."
"No problem. Thank you Linds." I looked at him and didn't know at first
what he was thanking me for but then I knew it was better to just say your
welcome.
"Your welcome." I walked him to the door.
"Bye daddy!" My son waved to his father sleepily.
"Bye son." And I saw the tears in his eyes and felt them in mine. I closed
the door and walked up the stairs. I laid my son in his bed and tried
holding the tears back, just looking at him I saw his father. I pulled the
covers up and over the little guy and reahced to give him a kiss. Before I
could though he reached out and put his hand on my cheek.
"Mommy otay?" This just made the tears harder to control. I just nodded my
head. "Why you sad mommy?" I hugged him and he hugged me. This little boy
was full of so much love, why couldn't his father be?
"I'm just having a bad day. Remember how mommy told you sometimes you just
have a day where things happen you never wanted to?" He nodded. "Well,
mommy had one of those days today." He sat up and came into my lap.
"I sorry mommy." And he kissed my nose this time. I had to smile at the
love in my child's eyes.
"It's okay, you made it better." He clapped his hands and smiled. I hugged
him once more and laid him down again.
"What about daddy?" I looked at him.
"What? What about daddy?"
"How come he so sad?" I couldn't hold my tears back.
"Because mommy and daddy aren't having good days today and we both felt
sad." I didn't know what I should say. "Buddy, for a real answer you have
to ask daddy."
"I hope you and daddy feel better mommy."
"Thanks baby, I'm sure if you tell daddy that tomorrow it'll make him feel
a little better."
"I will."
"Goodnight baby. Sleep tight."
"You too mommy." I walked out the door and turned the light off. "Mommy
wait!" I turned the light back on and saw him toddling out of bed and
hugging my leg. He went right back to his bed and hopped in then he looked
at me. "I here if you need hugs!" And he turned on his side falling to
sleep. I cried harder and whispered to my little boy.
"Thank you." I turned off the lights and walked into my room crying myself
to sleep.
End of Part 2.......Jewel I promise less waiting this time if everyone
wants me to continue!
Author: Lynds
Author's Note: This is out later than I thought I was hoping yesterday it
could have been out but stuff happens and I couldn't so I got it out a day
late. Thank you; Jewel! You are the best for your nagging that gets me
writing and for your kind words! Kiosha, Mary thank you for helping me with
ideas and checking it over for me. Claire, Lydia, FAITH, Magy, Court, Kylie
and EVERYONE else...Thank you for the feedback. I got quite a bit and
that's probably why this piece came together so quickly....So thank you.
Hope you all enjoy this part..It's short again but I could have it out
quick..... One more thing, did very quick POV change and that's what &&&&
is for.
Summary: Season 7 spoilers....Summary in the 1st part...
Disclamier: Don't own them.
Dedication: Jewel.........Here ya go, thanks for the kind words it was very
sweet and this next piece is all for you! Enjoy it and I promise since you
said you'd write, I'll write more for part 3 very very soon! here ya go!
"Single Turn, Lifes Regrets" Part 2
Lindsay's POV
I stood there half asleep and yes a little hungover and my soon to be ex-
husband is in front of me. I had to wipe my eyes more than once, I thought
I was crazy. Not only did I see him, well I thought I did but he was
wearing those navy blue pajamas. Okay, Lindsay shut up, you're not to think
that anymore about him.
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Great, I'm here now what the hell am I supposed to do? Think Donnell,
think! I feel her eyes on me and I don't really like it. Well okay the fact
I'm still in my pajamas might have some reasoning to it, but still. Didn't
she learn staring was impolite? Well if she didn't she should, I don't want
my son staring at people all the time, think of what it would do to their
self - esteem. Bobby, you're here to talk to her not talk about staring and
pajamas, now do something! I kept hearing that little mean voice in my head
telling me that over and over. Oh, don't you hate that voice!
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I reached out and hit his chest just to make sure he was real.
"Ow!" I heard him scream and he wobbled a little. Yup, it was him alright!
"I'm sorry."
"I know you're mad at me but physical abuse?" He spoke a little too loudly.
"I didn't know if it was really you. I was just making sure." I spoke still
sleeping, well not really but I wish!
"No, it's a stranger Lindsay, of course it's me!" He was getting upset at
me! He's the one that should be on his knees begging me to take him back. I
had to smile at that picture. "Why are you smiling?" He spoke, his voice
softer.
"No reason. Why are you here?" I snapped back to reality and looked at him,
my arms crossed my chest.
"I love you." I rolled my eyes and turned to walk inside. "I know you love
me too." I laughed to myself. First he takes my trust I have for him from
me and now he's telling me things he thinks I know. I turned to face him
and walked right up to him.
"You know?" I said rather loudly. He nods his head, he looks so frightened
of me, like I'd hurt him. Well, don't think I haven't though about it
because I have.
"Yes."
"And how the hell do you know I love you?" I was beyond mad now, and I
didn't care about my raised voice. He stepped toward me. "Back off Bobby!
Back off!" I pushed him away and I was already in tears. It was amazing how
just looking at him made me cry, I was supposed to hate him for what he
did, he was supposed to be the last in my mind but I felt for him so much,
I still love him. NO! Lindsay, NO! I have to stop. I can't go down that
road again I know what happened last time and I'm not hurting myself or my
son anymore. I need to do this, I am doing the right thing. Good girl, keep
saying that Lindsay and you'll be okay.
"If you didn't love me you wouldn't be in tears right now for practically
no reason. If you didn't love me you wouldn't have opened that door to let
me in. If you didn't love me you wouldn't be standing here still listening
to me and if you didn't love me you wouldn't be wearing my clothes or your
wedding rings." He pointed to my left hand. Damn that man! Can't hide
anything from him. I tried to hold back a grin and pulled a stong front on.
"Well, maybe I opened the door because I wanted to and I'm standing here
because I didn't feel like sleeping and maybe I'm in your clothes because I
don't have my pajamas packed yet, maybe they're still at your home! Maybe I
am wearing my rings because I haven't had time to take them off. Maybe I am
upset because the man I've devoted my life to forever has been unfaithful
and I can't trust him, and it hurts so much because I *loved* him!" I was
screaming at him now and I didn't mean too. It just happened. I looked at
him and I saw tears in his eyes too. We stood there in silence before I
heard the neighbors yelling at us to shut up.
"Guess your mom's neighbors don't want to hear our argument." He tried to
make light of the moment. That's Bobby for you.
"Guess not. Look maybe we could finish this in the hall inside?" Why are
you doing this. Rule number one: You don't have a conversation about love
with the man you're divorcing. Rule number two: You don't then invite him
into your home. Okay two rules Lindsay so far and you've broken them both.
Nice job!We walked inside and stood by the large staircase. I leaned
against it for support I thought for sure my knees would give in. "Now what
is the real reason you came here for?" I lowered my voice now being in the
house I didn't want to wake the baby.
"I went to see dad today."
"Congradulations. Tell him this failed marriage was all my fault?"
"No, of course not. It wasn't all your fault."
"Oh yeah right. I forgot." My voice was bitter.
"Linds, it wasn't. We both weren't working on keeping our marriage
together. Dad knows that. And Linds, it was mostly my fault." I looked up
at him and saw the pain and hurt in his eyes.
"Bobby." I sighed. "It wasn't all your fault, but let's not argue about
this. What's done is done."
"Is it?" I looked at him, what was he thinking.
"What?"
"Is it done? Is there anything we can do Lindsay?" I was so hoping that
question wasn't going to come up.
"Of course we could do something, but I'd end up being hurt all over, you
would and our son would. I'm not willing to risk that."
"So there is nothing we can do? We're really going through with the
divorce?" He was crying. Bobby and the damn tears, how could that not pain
me? I did the only thing I could think about and I walked to him and hugged
him. I felt his warm ams around me. They, weren't the arms of the man I
knew and loved though. Instead of giving me strength they needed strength.
We cried in each other's arms, finally I pulled back and looked at him. I
did love him, I couldn't deny that. But he hurt me, and I couldn't trust
him. I couldn't stay with a man I don't trust.
"I don't know Bobby. I can't trust you, I've lost that trust. You took that
trust away, and I can't be with a man I no longer trust in." I was crying
too.
"Can you.... do.. do you think that trust will ever come back?" He could
barely speak, I'd never seen Bobby like this.
"I don't know. It's too soon, I don't know."
"If it's too soon, why the divorce?" I looked into his eyes. Again, I had
no answer.
"Because you slept with another woman. You committed adultery, and I've
lost all my trust for you."
"But can't you hold off on the divorce, just wait."
"Wait for what Bobby? To change my mind? What suddenly overnight my mind
will change?" I was getting angry again.
"No, but maybe you and I could see someone, maybe we can get help, fix
this." I shook my head.
"No, no. You only want help now that you've had your little fun with that
little slut! That's all you cared about, you got what you wanted and now
only now you want to fix this mess! NO!" I walked to the front door and
opened it only to be stopped again. This time by the minature Bobby.
"Mommy." He was at the top of the staircase rubbing his eyes. I looked up
and also saw Bobby look up at him. "Daddy!" He screamed and toddled down
the stairs to Bobby. With open arms on both boys I saw them each run to
each other. Bobby picked our son up and held him in his arms. For the
millionth time that night, I saw his eyes fill with tears. Look what he had
done to not only me, but our son too. Our family. Because of his infedelity
our whole family was hurting.
"Hey sport. What are you doing up?" That's when I interjected. I walked
over and reached for my son.
"Yes, what are you doing up?" I lifted him into my arms and started to walk
upstairs.
"I woked up, and looked for you but you wasn't there." I kissed his head
and pushed some of the hair out of his eyes.
"I'm sorry baby, I was just talking to daddy." My son turned back to his
father and reached his arms out to him.
"Daddy." I looked at Bobby and he walked towards me.
"Little guy, I have to go, I just came to say good night to mommy and to
tell her I loved her." I was looking into his eyes and I knew he wasn't
lying. I smiled a little and turned my focus back to my son.
"Come on, give daddy a kiss and then it's time to go to bed." He jumped
down from my embrace and ran into his father's arms. It pained me to see
this.
"Love you daddy." Bobby kissed our son's forehead and then his nose and
hugged him. Little Bobby's arms clung around his father's neck.
"Love you so much little guy. I'll see you soon okay?" My son nodded with a
little smile.
"Pwomise?"
"of course, I just have to go for now okay?"
"Otay. Love you."
"I love you too." He walked to me and put our son in my arms.
"I'm going to put him to bed."
"Yeah, I should get going. I'm sorry I came over tonight."
"I'm not." And I meant it. I smiled a little to him and he smiled back.
"Well, I'll be over tomorrow to come get you."
"Thanks."
"No problem. Thank you Linds." I looked at him and didn't know at first
what he was thanking me for but then I knew it was better to just say your
welcome.
"Your welcome." I walked him to the door.
"Bye daddy!" My son waved to his father sleepily.
"Bye son." And I saw the tears in his eyes and felt them in mine. I closed
the door and walked up the stairs. I laid my son in his bed and tried
holding the tears back, just looking at him I saw his father. I pulled the
covers up and over the little guy and reahced to give him a kiss. Before I
could though he reached out and put his hand on my cheek.
"Mommy otay?" This just made the tears harder to control. I just nodded my
head. "Why you sad mommy?" I hugged him and he hugged me. This little boy
was full of so much love, why couldn't his father be?
"I'm just having a bad day. Remember how mommy told you sometimes you just
have a day where things happen you never wanted to?" He nodded. "Well,
mommy had one of those days today." He sat up and came into my lap.
"I sorry mommy." And he kissed my nose this time. I had to smile at the
love in my child's eyes.
"It's okay, you made it better." He clapped his hands and smiled. I hugged
him once more and laid him down again.
"What about daddy?" I looked at him.
"What? What about daddy?"
"How come he so sad?" I couldn't hold my tears back.
"Because mommy and daddy aren't having good days today and we both felt
sad." I didn't know what I should say. "Buddy, for a real answer you have
to ask daddy."
"I hope you and daddy feel better mommy."
"Thanks baby, I'm sure if you tell daddy that tomorrow it'll make him feel
a little better."
"I will."
"Goodnight baby. Sleep tight."
"You too mommy." I walked out the door and turned the light off. "Mommy
wait!" I turned the light back on and saw him toddling out of bed and
hugging my leg. He went right back to his bed and hopped in then he looked
at me. "I here if you need hugs!" And he turned on his side falling to
sleep. I cried harder and whispered to my little boy.
"Thank you." I turned off the lights and walked into my room crying myself
to sleep.
End of Part 2.......Jewel I promise less waiting this time if everyone
wants me to continue!