It was like somebody had reconnected his soul to the rest of his body, like fixing a break in a circuit in his mechanical arm, and that someone was slowly lowering him back in to the land of the living.

His eyes snapped open as if he was waking up from a bad dream. That was, after all, what he'd been experiencing. What he felt next made him question whether he'd walked from one nightmare into the next.

Anja sat on the edge of his bed, watching over him. He would have felt happy that she cared so much to stay by his side if not for the look in her eyes. They looked at him, two cold chips of volcanic rock, as she stared mercilessly.

"Hello love," He said quietly, testing the waters. It occurred to him that he'd never mentioned to her anything that alluded to his flashbacks. He just hoped that she wasn't upset because of that.

She was silent for a few seconds before her lips parted from their pressed-together position. "You lied to me," She said simply as the anger rose up and overtook her.

"What?" He asked in shock, trying his best to act surprised when he truly wasn't. "I never did anything of the sort!"

"You lied to me about being clean!" She exclaimed, her voice suddenly booming. "You're still on spice –" She paused, choking back a sob, "And you went around and did it behind my back thinking I'd never figure it out!"

"Anja, I'm telling you. I never lied to you. If you believe anything, believe me now when I tell you that I AM clean. That was just a flashback, one of the many side effects that I have to deal with because of my mistakes. I'm just sorry you had to witness it," Brodey said earnestly as he reached out to touch her hand. Anja quickly recoiled at his touch but continued to listen. "They were never able to cleanse me of the toxins. I crave Ganliet constantly. There's nothing I can do about that or the flashbacks. That's why I have the extract supply with me. I normally can prevent episodes like the one I had if I get it quickly enough."

"Why should I believe you?" She asked as tears clung to her eyelashes. "This isn't the first time you've kept information from me about yourself. I've told you all about myself but you just hide away inside like a little boy! I don't understand you, Brodey. Why do you have to be so secretive?"

"I don't know," He said gently. "But what I do know is that I love you and care about you deeply. I never meant to hurt you. I just wasn't thinking when I didn't tell you."

"Oh Brodey, I don't know if I can trust you anymore!" She sobbed with tears rolling down her face.

"Shhhh, don't say that," He whispered, sitting up to pull her into a tender hug. He kissed the top of her head, letting her tears trickle down his bare chest as he stroked her hair. "I promise I'll be more open with you. No more secrets."

"You promise?" Anja sniffed, her voice muffled as she spoke against his chest.

"Yes, sweetheart," He insisted softly, cupping her face in his hands and planting a kiss on her forehead. "I promise."

"Awwww, ain't that a disgustingly sweet moment?" Kyp taunted from the doorway.

"Durron, I'm going to kill you now," Anja hissed, moving to stand up and run after him.

Brodey pulled her closer, trying to keep her from leaving so quickly. "Kyp, can't we have a little alone time?"

With a brief cocky salute Kyp acknowledged Brodey's request. He vanished to go bother Jaina and Jag some more, leaving the two alone once again.

"So, if I recall correctly, you were saying something about a surprise you had for me before I passed out?" Brodey asked, raising one eyebrow at her suspiciously.

"Well, I'm not so sure you deserve it now, after lying to me," Anja said with a coy smile.

"Come on!" Brodey pleaded. "I'm really sorry about that. Really I am, but you're killing me here! I want to know what my surprise is."

"This," She said softly as she pressed against him and kissed him fervently.

~*~*~

"What do you want out of life?" Anja asked quietly, trailing her fingers along the lean muscles of his upper arm.

The two had been lying there, snuggling together under a thermal blanket, for what now seemed like hours.

"Wow, Miss Gallandro, what is this?" Brodey laughed as he pulled her closer, wrapping her in a warm embrace. "I cave once and you immediately start asking the difficult questions!"

"Just answer the question, secret boy!" She teased, smacking him playfully on the arm.

"Fine," He said with a smirk as he gazed up at the ceiling. "I guess I want what everybody wants. You know what I'm talking about. I want a place to call home, a loving family, and a purpose in life."

"Mmmm," Anja muttered dreamily as she kissed his shoulder. "Do you think you'll get all that?"

Brodey gave a small snort in response to her candid question. "Definitely not. There are days when I think I won't get any of it, but that's just the pessimist in me coming out."

"You know what I think?" She muttered as her kisses found their way up to his cheek.

"No, I don't. What does Anja Gallandro think about this issue?" Brodey teased, turning his head to kiss the tip of her nose.

"I think that if you really believe that you can achieve something, anything, then there's a much greater chance of it coming true," She said enthusiastically while motioning with her hands.

"Sounds good to me," He shrugged. "The problem is that my confidence is blown after the hand I've been dealt."

"Heh. Believe me, I'm with you there," Anja answered soberly. "Few people have had to go through what we have. Jaina Solo and her family are definitely included among those few. I think you just have to work through all that and keep the faith that at some point your bad luck will run out. Then things will be fine again."

Brodey nodded silently, contemplating her words, but gradually the corners of his mouth curled up into a smile. "I never knew you were one to have faith in anything besides the almighty credit. I'm surprised with you!"

"Narundi, I'm simply loaded with surprises. Just you wait and see!" She chuckled and brushed his shaggy bangs out of his eyes.

"I can hardly wait to see what the next one is!" He laughed back with a wink.

The ship suddenly bucked and shuddered, as if it was set to go off on some predetermined cue, right as the last word escaped Brodey's lips. It tossed them around so violently that they had to cling to the edge of the bed and each other to keep from falling hard onto the cold metal floor.

"Seriously, I had NOTHING to do with that one," Anja insisted as fear crept into her deep brown eyes.

The jostling had stopped already, giving them time to recover, but the lights were growing dimmer by the second. Brodey could only hope that it was just his mind playing tricks on him.

"I'm going to see what's going on with the power," He grumbled as he struggled into his pants. His clumsiness and the lack of light in the room contributed to a number of bruises. He cursed loudly as he hopped around with one leg in, banging into walls and other objects.

"Brodey," Kyp called from the cockpit. "We've got a situation here!"

"What is it?" Brodey asked anxiously as he entered the cockpit and crouched down in between the pilot and copilot seats. "What did you do to my ship?"

"Well, we're not quite sure yet," Jaina said uneasily and Brodey could sense she was only telling half of the truth. "What we do know is that we're losing power fast."

"What are you saying?" Brodey asked impatiently. "Is there a planet nearby?"

"Yes, but it's occupied," Jag said, his brow furrowing with worry.

"I don't care," Brodey snapped. "Better there than sitting out here, with no power or life support, just waiting to die or be picked up by the Vong."

"Kid, you're not thinking clearly," Kyp warned in a parental tone.

"Kyp, shut up," Brodey responded coolly. "I assure you that I haven't thought this clearly in years. Set a course for that planet. We're taking her in."

"You mean?" Jaina asked hesitantly.

"Yup," Brodey interrupted. "Crash landing time!"

"Don't you think we should think this over?" Jag protested uneasily, wringing his hands on the legs of his jumpsuit. "It seems like a rather rash decision to me."

"Fel, I like you," Brodey said mildly as he draped an arm over the shorter man's shoulders. "Please don't make me hurt you. It's my ship. Therefore, it's my call."

"You arrogant Son of a Hutt!" Jag hissed in outrage. "Jaina, you're not going to let him get away with that, are you? He's going to get us all killed!"

"Actually, I am going to let him get away with it," Jaina said in a soft but grave tone. "It's the best shot we've got."

Jag abruptly closed his mouth and turned back to his job as copilot but it didn't take a jedi to tell he was not pleased. The muscles of his jaw clenched as he set his teeth firmly together and glared down at the console. He felt betrayed, even though a tiny part of him knew that this was the best alternative, and he still couldn't believe that Jaina would let anyone trample all over her authority.

"Well kid, if we end up dead from this you can bet that I'll be chasing you with a vibroblade all over the afterlife," Kyp joked, trying to sound light-hearted but failing wretchedly. It came out sounding more like a nervous warning.

"You can go run all over your afterlife looking for me, but I won't be there," Brodey noted as he jabbed a finger into Kyp's chest. "I'm going to be down on that planet, decaying in that wreckage until there's nothing left of me."

"I thought you were religious," Kyp commented with great curiosity.

"Yup, but I got over it," Brodey replied bluntly, shrugging his shoulders.

"What about all that talk of gods that you worshipped?" Kyp asked, even more confused.

"Stang, Kyp! Haven't you ever heard of mythology?" Brodey asked edgily. "We're about to crash into an unknown planet and all you can think to talk about is my religious beliefs? Wake up and smell the caf!"

"All right, I'm sorry I asked," Kyp muttered with a roll of his eyes as he took his seat next to Brodey and tightened his crash webbing.

"So, did anybody say why we're running out of power?" Anja asked, popping up on Brodey's other side.

"Big boom on outside of ship," Kyp explained slowly, using a primitive form of sign language.

"Durron!" Anja bellowed in annoyance.

"Why did I sit in between you two?" Brodey asked as he threw up his hands in a gesture of hopelessness.

"Because you love us so very much!" Kyp cooed mockingly, pinching Brodey's cheek until the younger man smacked his hand away.

"Sticks, how's that landing going?" Brodey inquired, shifting his attention to more pleasant things.

"About as well as you can expect from a crash, Cat," She answered nervously. "We're entering the atmosphere. Hold on tight back there."

The small passenger cruiser shook from the turbulence of the planet's dense atmosphere. Holding on for dear life was the only option as the craft descended rapidly into the lush jungle canopy.

Anja grabbed Brodey's hand tightly and he gratefully returned the squeeze, bracing for the ship's imminent impact. The Stingray scraped perilously against branches like the gnashing of teeth before the ship came to a bone-grinding and utterly silent stop.