Disclaimer: I do not own "Harry Potter", etc, etc, etc. It all belongs to
J.K Rowling, except for stuff you don't recognize.
Summary: Some wounds may never heal . . .
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~ Miles To Go Before I Sleep
- Chapter Three: Watch The Woods Fill Up With Snow
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" - Can't believe this happened; why her, for Merlin's sake?"
"D'you think she can handle waking up and changing herself? I mean, none of us can exactly - "
"Point received, Ron, thanks."
"Uh - what about Sirius, Prof - dammit - Remus? He was pretty shaken up. Do - do you think he got any sleep last night?"
Pause.
"I don't think so, but - well - none of us did, did we? Padfoot just stayed by the bed we moved her to and kept an eye on her - I only wonder how we're all going to deal with this, how SHE'S going to be able to - "
Sirius squeezed his weary eyes shut and then opened them again. He could hear them all too clearly, standing outside the room Hermione was using in the late hours of the morning, each worrying about their victimized friend and now, apparently, him too.
He turned his head to look back at her, lying still on the bed, curled up under the covers with a slightly troubled look on her face. He was grateful that at least she was being spared the nightmares, but everything in him ached for what she must be feeling, and how she was going to handle things when she woke up -
Once she was recovering, though, Sirius would be out of here like a curse, in search of the man who had done this to her.
"Mmmph."
He started, and leaned forward to take her hand and squeeze it gently. "Hermione?" he prompted softly, wondering if she was about to wake.
And then, her eyes opened.
"Wow," she murmured in a painfully soft voice, blinking slowly at him with thick lashes, "This seems to have become a habit of greeting, Sirius."
"Hey, 'Mione," he smiled down at her. "How're you feeling?"
"Feeling . . ." that seemed to jerk her back to the reality, and Sirius watched as she remembered, as those eyes filled again with that haunted shadow that made his heart break and made him want to break something else.
He swallowed. "Do you - do you want to see Harry, or Ron? Or Remus?"
"Sure." She shrugged weakly, trying to sit up. "But - but I'd rather have a shower and change first."
Crookshanks, curled up on Sirius's lap, purred in distress and tried to leap over to his mistress, but Sirius kept him at bay, knowing that the last thing Hermione needed was overwhelming affection.
He stood up. "We'll get some food ready while you change," he offered. "If you need anything - "
"I know where to come for it." She finished with a crooked smile. "Don't worry about me, Sirius. I'm - I'll be fine."
"'Course you will."
He turned away quickly and headed for the door, afraid that the tears that were clogging his throat might surface. By the time he reached the living room outside, however, anger had become his blanketing emotion again.
The three in the room turned around at the sound of Hermione's door closing.
"Well?" Ron jumped up. "How is she?"
"As well as can be expected." Sirius said quietly. "Take it easy, Ron."
Ron scowled. "I hate it when people say 'as well as can be expected'. You sound like Mum."
"Thanks for the warning."
Harry and Remus looked at Sirius closely. "Are you all right, Padfoot?" Remus asked gently. "You look tired, and rather - "
"I'm fine."
"Everyone says that." Ron pointed out irrepressibly, but subsided at a warning glare from Harry, who then stood up and asked Sirius whether Hermione was showering and whether they should all get some breakfast ready (none of them had eaten). Sirius nodded, and followed them numbly to the kitchen.
What lay in store for them all, he wondered, if Hermione couldn't get past the horror of what she'd experienced? Little as they might want to admit it, she was a rock that kept them all grounded, especially Harry and Ron in their wilder moments, and she had a moralistic, responsible streak that even Remus sometimes couldn't match. What would they do without their Hermione with them?
And what about her? How was she supposed to live through each day with the demons shadowing and haunting her, terror striking her at every unfamiliar corner when she wondered whether her attacker was waiting around the curb . . .?
Sirius's jaw clenched with anger, and he barely noticed what he was doing as he helped Remus by chopping tomatoes.
What would it do to her to find another piece of herself dying each day as she withdrew further and further into her self-protective shell? Sirius knew that it was up to them to make life as normal as possible for her, and keep her alive as best they could, but wasn't their a limit to how much they could do? He hated it; feeling so helpless and angry; but he didn't have a choice - not yet anyway.
She was like a forest, he thought with a slightly bitter smile, a beautiful forest that had grown and protected for years, and was now the victim of an onslaught of danger and demons, being suffocated and buried under a torrent of snow . . .
"Hi."
The sound of her voice, soft and tentative, made him jerk out of his thoughts and whirl around to see her standing in the doorway of the kitchen. Remus at once flashed her a warm smile and asked her whether she wanted bacon or ham, and Ron, with surprising swiftness, began describing to her the full recovery of his broken arm (a subject that seemed to divert her somewhat) but Sirius once again found himself speechless, and heard Harry exhale sharply beside him.
She looked so vulnerable and small, clad in pajamas that were a size too big for her, her hair flopping around her face aimlessly. In her arms was a teddy bear.
Harry headed over to the table and sat down as Remus served bacon around. Sirius sank into one of the chairs as well, and glanced at Hermione once more before trying to listen to the conversation they were having.
"Personally, I don't see what Harry ever saw in Cho," Ron was saying with utter conviction. "She was plain stupid, and rather disloyal, if you ask me."
"Luckily, Ron, I don't think Harry was asking you."
Ron grinned at Remus. "All right, fair point. But, Harry," he added quickly, "She was pretty bad-looking."
"Oh, she was all right." Hermione put in, surprising them all. Her voice was still rather timid, however, and it caused Sirius a pang to think of what she was going through.
Harry 'hah'-ed triumphantly. "Well, at least someone agrees with me." He declared. "Not," he added hurriedly, "That I still like her at all!"
"Fleur's still the best." Ron declared, and Remus and Harry both began to laugh; Ron was so predictable.
Hermione snorted. "Sure she is, Ron." She said with a slight edge of sarcasm. "She's just the peach of them all."
They all laughed at that, but Sirius knew something was wrong the instant Ron shot back good-naturedly with: "And I suppose VICKY was the best of choices, eh?"
Something - Sirius couldn't describe what it was - flickered in Hermione's eyes and they suddenly went dead, but not before he saw the flash of pain cross her features. His heart stopped. Maybe Hermione was still sensitive about her breakup with the Bulgarian Quidditch player, but then again, Sirius had never found out exactly WHY they'd broken up.
He shook his head. It was impossible. How could it be - ?
"Sirius?" Harry frowned at him. Obviously, if the others had sensed anything as well, they weren't showing it. "Something wrong?"
"Too much salt." He quickly swallowed his bacon, although it felt like a stone squeezing down his throat, and stared furiously down at his plate.
Hermione didn't speak up again for the rest of breakfast.
And Sirius, helpless and angry, could do nothing but watch the woods fill up with snow.
** TBC.
**
A/N: Chapter Four will be up as soon as I can get some time to write! Thanks so much for reviewing so far, and please keep on doing so! Enjoy!
Summary: Some wounds may never heal . . .
**
*
~ Miles To Go Before I Sleep
- Chapter Three: Watch The Woods Fill Up With Snow
*
**
" - Can't believe this happened; why her, for Merlin's sake?"
"D'you think she can handle waking up and changing herself? I mean, none of us can exactly - "
"Point received, Ron, thanks."
"Uh - what about Sirius, Prof - dammit - Remus? He was pretty shaken up. Do - do you think he got any sleep last night?"
Pause.
"I don't think so, but - well - none of us did, did we? Padfoot just stayed by the bed we moved her to and kept an eye on her - I only wonder how we're all going to deal with this, how SHE'S going to be able to - "
Sirius squeezed his weary eyes shut and then opened them again. He could hear them all too clearly, standing outside the room Hermione was using in the late hours of the morning, each worrying about their victimized friend and now, apparently, him too.
He turned his head to look back at her, lying still on the bed, curled up under the covers with a slightly troubled look on her face. He was grateful that at least she was being spared the nightmares, but everything in him ached for what she must be feeling, and how she was going to handle things when she woke up -
Once she was recovering, though, Sirius would be out of here like a curse, in search of the man who had done this to her.
"Mmmph."
He started, and leaned forward to take her hand and squeeze it gently. "Hermione?" he prompted softly, wondering if she was about to wake.
And then, her eyes opened.
"Wow," she murmured in a painfully soft voice, blinking slowly at him with thick lashes, "This seems to have become a habit of greeting, Sirius."
"Hey, 'Mione," he smiled down at her. "How're you feeling?"
"Feeling . . ." that seemed to jerk her back to the reality, and Sirius watched as she remembered, as those eyes filled again with that haunted shadow that made his heart break and made him want to break something else.
He swallowed. "Do you - do you want to see Harry, or Ron? Or Remus?"
"Sure." She shrugged weakly, trying to sit up. "But - but I'd rather have a shower and change first."
Crookshanks, curled up on Sirius's lap, purred in distress and tried to leap over to his mistress, but Sirius kept him at bay, knowing that the last thing Hermione needed was overwhelming affection.
He stood up. "We'll get some food ready while you change," he offered. "If you need anything - "
"I know where to come for it." She finished with a crooked smile. "Don't worry about me, Sirius. I'm - I'll be fine."
"'Course you will."
He turned away quickly and headed for the door, afraid that the tears that were clogging his throat might surface. By the time he reached the living room outside, however, anger had become his blanketing emotion again.
The three in the room turned around at the sound of Hermione's door closing.
"Well?" Ron jumped up. "How is she?"
"As well as can be expected." Sirius said quietly. "Take it easy, Ron."
Ron scowled. "I hate it when people say 'as well as can be expected'. You sound like Mum."
"Thanks for the warning."
Harry and Remus looked at Sirius closely. "Are you all right, Padfoot?" Remus asked gently. "You look tired, and rather - "
"I'm fine."
"Everyone says that." Ron pointed out irrepressibly, but subsided at a warning glare from Harry, who then stood up and asked Sirius whether Hermione was showering and whether they should all get some breakfast ready (none of them had eaten). Sirius nodded, and followed them numbly to the kitchen.
What lay in store for them all, he wondered, if Hermione couldn't get past the horror of what she'd experienced? Little as they might want to admit it, she was a rock that kept them all grounded, especially Harry and Ron in their wilder moments, and she had a moralistic, responsible streak that even Remus sometimes couldn't match. What would they do without their Hermione with them?
And what about her? How was she supposed to live through each day with the demons shadowing and haunting her, terror striking her at every unfamiliar corner when she wondered whether her attacker was waiting around the curb . . .?
Sirius's jaw clenched with anger, and he barely noticed what he was doing as he helped Remus by chopping tomatoes.
What would it do to her to find another piece of herself dying each day as she withdrew further and further into her self-protective shell? Sirius knew that it was up to them to make life as normal as possible for her, and keep her alive as best they could, but wasn't their a limit to how much they could do? He hated it; feeling so helpless and angry; but he didn't have a choice - not yet anyway.
She was like a forest, he thought with a slightly bitter smile, a beautiful forest that had grown and protected for years, and was now the victim of an onslaught of danger and demons, being suffocated and buried under a torrent of snow . . .
"Hi."
The sound of her voice, soft and tentative, made him jerk out of his thoughts and whirl around to see her standing in the doorway of the kitchen. Remus at once flashed her a warm smile and asked her whether she wanted bacon or ham, and Ron, with surprising swiftness, began describing to her the full recovery of his broken arm (a subject that seemed to divert her somewhat) but Sirius once again found himself speechless, and heard Harry exhale sharply beside him.
She looked so vulnerable and small, clad in pajamas that were a size too big for her, her hair flopping around her face aimlessly. In her arms was a teddy bear.
Harry headed over to the table and sat down as Remus served bacon around. Sirius sank into one of the chairs as well, and glanced at Hermione once more before trying to listen to the conversation they were having.
"Personally, I don't see what Harry ever saw in Cho," Ron was saying with utter conviction. "She was plain stupid, and rather disloyal, if you ask me."
"Luckily, Ron, I don't think Harry was asking you."
Ron grinned at Remus. "All right, fair point. But, Harry," he added quickly, "She was pretty bad-looking."
"Oh, she was all right." Hermione put in, surprising them all. Her voice was still rather timid, however, and it caused Sirius a pang to think of what she was going through.
Harry 'hah'-ed triumphantly. "Well, at least someone agrees with me." He declared. "Not," he added hurriedly, "That I still like her at all!"
"Fleur's still the best." Ron declared, and Remus and Harry both began to laugh; Ron was so predictable.
Hermione snorted. "Sure she is, Ron." She said with a slight edge of sarcasm. "She's just the peach of them all."
They all laughed at that, but Sirius knew something was wrong the instant Ron shot back good-naturedly with: "And I suppose VICKY was the best of choices, eh?"
Something - Sirius couldn't describe what it was - flickered in Hermione's eyes and they suddenly went dead, but not before he saw the flash of pain cross her features. His heart stopped. Maybe Hermione was still sensitive about her breakup with the Bulgarian Quidditch player, but then again, Sirius had never found out exactly WHY they'd broken up.
He shook his head. It was impossible. How could it be - ?
"Sirius?" Harry frowned at him. Obviously, if the others had sensed anything as well, they weren't showing it. "Something wrong?"
"Too much salt." He quickly swallowed his bacon, although it felt like a stone squeezing down his throat, and stared furiously down at his plate.
Hermione didn't speak up again for the rest of breakfast.
And Sirius, helpless and angry, could do nothing but watch the woods fill up with snow.
** TBC.
**
A/N: Chapter Four will be up as soon as I can get some time to write! Thanks so much for reviewing so far, and please keep on doing so! Enjoy!