Jamie's Miracle
Chapter 9
Broe 83
On the way home from the doctor' office I was ecstatic. But Jamie was quiet. Too quiet. I took one hand off the wheel and gently squeezed her hand.
"You okay?" I asked softly.
She turned toward me. "Mmm Hmm," she said barely above a whisper.
She tried to turn around before I saw it, but I saw it. Her lip trembled and a lone tear fell down her soft, pale cheek. I started to question her about it but then I stopped. She would share it with me in her own time. If you love somebody, you have to trust that they'll be open with you. That is one of the many lessons Jamie taught me in our short time together.
"I'm gonna pull the car in the garage, it's supposed to rain later." I said as we pulled in the driveway.
" 'Kay" Jamie answered but I don't really think she heard me.
When I got in the house I went straight upstairs. I'm not really sure why, I just felt like I should for some reason. When I turned the corner to go in to our bedroom, I found Jamie lying on the bed. Her back was to me but I could tell she was crying. I took off my shoes and gently climbed in to bed behind her and put my arms around her. When she felt me, her body relaxed but her crying became stronger.
I kissed her shoulder, "Whatcha thinkin'?
She had to take a few deep breaths before she could answer. "Oh Landon, it's awful."
"What is sweetheart, the baby?" I asked struggling to understand.
"No," she answered slowly, "well, yes. I'm not sure. I'm not sure of anything anymore."
She trailed off and began to sob. I just let her cry for a few minutes as I listened to the sound of the rain that had begun to fall outside.
"I've lost my hope." She said quietly when she could speak again.
I stroked her hair as I waited for her to continue wanting to know the whole story before I put in my two cents.
"Growing up, whenever I was sad, scared, hurt, or sick, I would turn to my faith and I could always find an explanation for the bad stuff in my life. But I can't explain this, Landon. Why would God bless me with a child when He knows I would have to leave it? It's bad enough that I have to leave you but now. This can't be in God's plan, it just can't, it doesn't make sense."
She began to cry again. I rubbed her arm in a vain effort to comfort her and I suddenly realized how thin she was getting.
'Don't think about that now Landon, you gotta be strong think of a way to make her feel better.to give her back her hope.'
From out of nowhere, I began to sing. It must have been a miracle because I had never sang before or since nor do I have any need to. The melody that filled the air was a familiar one:
THERE'S A SONG THAT'S INSIDE OF MY SOUL IT'S THE ONE THAT I'VE TRIED TO WRITE OVER AND OVER AGAIN I'M AWAKE IN THE INFINITE COLD BUT YOU SING TO ME OVER AND OVER AGAIN.
When I finished the song Jamie rolled over and looked at me, "Promise me Landon, promise me you'll tell our baby all about me when I'm gone. Promise me the people I love won't forget me."
I touched her cheek. I loved her softness. It's one of the things that I carry with me even now. "I love you, Jamie. You'll always be with me, right here." I pointed toward my heart.
I kissed her hands and she smiled at me. Then she rolled back over and we lay there together listening to the rain, which oddly enough, seemed gentler, even though it wasn't. I don't know how long it took before my earlier alarm about Jamie's health left my head, but eventually it did and I fell asleep.
On the way home from the doctor' office I was ecstatic. But Jamie was quiet. Too quiet. I took one hand off the wheel and gently squeezed her hand.
"You okay?" I asked softly.
She turned toward me. "Mmm Hmm," she said barely above a whisper.
She tried to turn around before I saw it, but I saw it. Her lip trembled and a lone tear fell down her soft, pale cheek. I started to question her about it but then I stopped. She would share it with me in her own time. If you love somebody, you have to trust that they'll be open with you. That is one of the many lessons Jamie taught me in our short time together.
"I'm gonna pull the car in the garage, it's supposed to rain later." I said as we pulled in the driveway.
" 'Kay" Jamie answered but I don't really think she heard me.
When I got in the house I went straight upstairs. I'm not really sure why, I just felt like I should for some reason. When I turned the corner to go in to our bedroom, I found Jamie lying on the bed. Her back was to me but I could tell she was crying. I took off my shoes and gently climbed in to bed behind her and put my arms around her. When she felt me, her body relaxed but her crying became stronger.
I kissed her shoulder, "Whatcha thinkin'?
She had to take a few deep breaths before she could answer. "Oh Landon, it's awful."
"What is sweetheart, the baby?" I asked struggling to understand.
"No," she answered slowly, "well, yes. I'm not sure. I'm not sure of anything anymore."
She trailed off and began to sob. I just let her cry for a few minutes as I listened to the sound of the rain that had begun to fall outside.
"I've lost my hope." She said quietly when she could speak again.
I stroked her hair as I waited for her to continue wanting to know the whole story before I put in my two cents.
"Growing up, whenever I was sad, scared, hurt, or sick, I would turn to my faith and I could always find an explanation for the bad stuff in my life. But I can't explain this, Landon. Why would God bless me with a child when He knows I would have to leave it? It's bad enough that I have to leave you but now. This can't be in God's plan, it just can't, it doesn't make sense."
She began to cry again. I rubbed her arm in a vain effort to comfort her and I suddenly realized how thin she was getting.
'Don't think about that now Landon, you gotta be strong think of a way to make her feel better.to give her back her hope.'
From out of nowhere, I began to sing. It must have been a miracle because I had never sang before or since nor do I have any need to. The melody that filled the air was a familiar one:
THERE'S A SONG THAT'S INSIDE OF MY SOUL IT'S THE ONE THAT I'VE TRIED TO WRITE OVER AND OVER AGAIN I'M AWAKE IN THE INFINITE COLD BUT YOU SING TO ME OVER AND OVER AGAIN.
When I finished the song Jamie rolled over and looked at me, "Promise me Landon, promise me you'll tell our baby all about me when I'm gone. Promise me the people I love won't forget me."
I touched her cheek. I loved her softness. It's one of the things that I carry with me even now. "I love you, Jamie. You'll always be with me, right here." I pointed toward my heart.
I kissed her hands and she smiled at me. Then she rolled back over and we lay there together listening to the rain, which oddly enough, seemed gentler, even though it wasn't. I don't know how long it took before my earlier alarm about Jamie's health left my head, but eventually it did and I fell asleep.