A/N: Hey guys! Thanks for the reviews! Anyway, I hope you like the chapter! I'm thinking of working a sub-plot in... any ideas?
Oh yeah, I forgot to mention, I obviously don't own Degrassi or any of it's characters!
" One thing I know fo sho', is that you don't give a shit about me, and so I'm walking out the door..." Paige's alarm clock droned on. All night she hadn't slept well. Everytime she heard the slightest noise, she was sure it was Dean, coming back to rape her. Whenever the house creaked, she sat up in bed, panicked. It was stupid, but she was still scared. Paige didn't want to go to school. All she wanted to do was sit in bed and cry, but that wasn't gonna happen. Quickly she threw on a pair of baby blue sweats, and a white, baggy v-necked shirt. She threw her hair into a quick ponytail. She knew there were bumps in it, but she couldn't bring herself to care. Sighing, she walked downstairs, into the kitchen.
"Hey honey!" her mom said cheerfully.
Paige forced a smile. "Hey mom."
Her mom saw right through her forced smile. "Paige... what's wrong?"
Paige shrugged. "Nothing mom.. I'm just... a bit tired. I couldn't fall asleep last night."
Paige's mom looked her over carefully. "Well.. when you're ready to tell me the real reason, I'm here."
Paige blinked back tears. Her mother wouldn't be so understanding once she knew that her precious daughter was a slut. "Whatever mom.. I'm fine."
Her mother sighed. "Alright. I made you some oatmeal." she said, passing her a bowl.
Paige's stomach lurched at the sight of food. If she ate that, she would throw it all up. "Um.. I'm not too hungry mom. I'm just gonna go to school, ok?"
Her mother threw her hands up in the air. "Fine Paige. Bye. Have a nice day at school!" Paige waved weakly and walked out the door. The air was fresh and cool, usually her favourite kind of day. Slowly she walked to school, with her head down. She knew that if anyone looked at her, she'd burst into tears. Paige slowly approached the school, and walked inside rather than socializing. She sat down at her desk in her homeroom, and stared straight ahead at the door. The bell rang, and everyone walked in. They all looked surprised to see Paige sitting in class already, and of course her outfit was highly out of character. Paige looked down at her hands, as she felt everybodys eyes on her. *Stop looking at me... I'm nothing special.. just look away.. please..* she thought silently. The silence in the room was defeaning. Paige wanted to scream, to shout, anything. But that wouldn't do at all. Because if she screamed, she wouldn't be able to stop talking. And everyone would find out. Hazel walked up to Paige's desk.
"Paige! Hey!" she paused as she wrinkled her nose. "Um.. is the grunge look back or something?"
"Huh? Oh wait.. you mean my clothes right?" Hazel nodded. "I just felt like being comfortable, ok? I don't understand why it has to be such a big deal!" Paige said, practically shouting. Everyone stared at her again, and a knot welled up her throat. It felt as if there was huge neon sign above her head that said slut. All her muscles were tense, her back felt rigid, her neck muscles were knotted and aching. She cracked her fingers and bit her nails out of nervous anxiety. Hazel picked up her hand and looked at her now non-existent nails.
"Aw Paige.. hun did you have to do that? Your nails take so long to grow! After school I say you go get some acryllics with me?"
Paige sighed. "No Hazel, I don't think so-"
Hazel cut her off sharply. "Oh yeah, we have Spirit Squad!" she smacked herself lightly on the forehead. "I can't believe I forgot! Anyway.. I had something to tell you! Kay, well I was talking to Jimmy, and he said..."
As Hazel droned on, Paige nodded every once in a while, and smiled occasionally. But her mind was elsewhere, obviously. How was she gonna go to Spirit Squad? There was no way she could do it. She'd have to quit the squad. That was all there was to it. Suddenly Spinner walked into class.
"Gavin, you're late. That's the third time this month!" Ms.Kwan said, disappointed.
"Sorry Ms.Kwan." he said monotonously. As he walked by Paige's desk, her heart raced. Spinner smirked at her. "So, Paige, hows your sick Grandmother doing?"
Paige paled. "Umm.. she's... well.."
Spinner shot her a disgusted look. "Yeah, that's what I thought. Whatever Paige." he walked on over to his desk.
"Spinner.. wait! I'm sorry.. but.. I.. I.. just.. I just can't deal with this right now! I'm sorry... I'm sorry..." she said softly. Her head ached. She couldn't take this much longer. And this was only day one.
"Paige? Are you alright?" Hazel asked, looking at her warily.
Paige smiled weakly. "Umm.. yeah. I'm fine. Just a bit burned out."
Hazel laughed. "Yeah, I could tell. Anyway, so what happened with you and Deaaan?" she asked in a singsong voice.
Paige blanched. Her heart began thudding heavily in her chest. "Uh.. nothing. I.. I decided he's just not my type, you know?"
Hazel scoffed. "What? You were SO into him! He's fine, he's older, he likes you!"
Paige swallowed hard. "Well.. he's just not what I thought." she said quickly.
Now Hazel looked nervous. "Well, if you're not um into him anymore, you wouldn't care if I went for him?"
Paige's jaw-dropped. "Hazel! No! You can't go out with Dean!"
Hazel glared at her. "You said you're not into him! He's hot, he's older, good body, sweetie, like why should I stay away?"
Paige gave Hazel an even, level stare. "Maybe because I thought our friendship was worth more than that."
Hazel shrugged. "Fine. Whatever."
Hot tears burned in Paige's eyes. Already Spinner hated her, and now Hazel and her were on the brink of a fight. It was all too much to deal with. Letting out a soft moan, she lay her head down on her desk, and covered it with her arms.
Oh yeah, I forgot to mention, I obviously don't own Degrassi or any of it's characters!
" One thing I know fo sho', is that you don't give a shit about me, and so I'm walking out the door..." Paige's alarm clock droned on. All night she hadn't slept well. Everytime she heard the slightest noise, she was sure it was Dean, coming back to rape her. Whenever the house creaked, she sat up in bed, panicked. It was stupid, but she was still scared. Paige didn't want to go to school. All she wanted to do was sit in bed and cry, but that wasn't gonna happen. Quickly she threw on a pair of baby blue sweats, and a white, baggy v-necked shirt. She threw her hair into a quick ponytail. She knew there were bumps in it, but she couldn't bring herself to care. Sighing, she walked downstairs, into the kitchen.
"Hey honey!" her mom said cheerfully.
Paige forced a smile. "Hey mom."
Her mom saw right through her forced smile. "Paige... what's wrong?"
Paige shrugged. "Nothing mom.. I'm just... a bit tired. I couldn't fall asleep last night."
Paige's mom looked her over carefully. "Well.. when you're ready to tell me the real reason, I'm here."
Paige blinked back tears. Her mother wouldn't be so understanding once she knew that her precious daughter was a slut. "Whatever mom.. I'm fine."
Her mother sighed. "Alright. I made you some oatmeal." she said, passing her a bowl.
Paige's stomach lurched at the sight of food. If she ate that, she would throw it all up. "Um.. I'm not too hungry mom. I'm just gonna go to school, ok?"
Her mother threw her hands up in the air. "Fine Paige. Bye. Have a nice day at school!" Paige waved weakly and walked out the door. The air was fresh and cool, usually her favourite kind of day. Slowly she walked to school, with her head down. She knew that if anyone looked at her, she'd burst into tears. Paige slowly approached the school, and walked inside rather than socializing. She sat down at her desk in her homeroom, and stared straight ahead at the door. The bell rang, and everyone walked in. They all looked surprised to see Paige sitting in class already, and of course her outfit was highly out of character. Paige looked down at her hands, as she felt everybodys eyes on her. *Stop looking at me... I'm nothing special.. just look away.. please..* she thought silently. The silence in the room was defeaning. Paige wanted to scream, to shout, anything. But that wouldn't do at all. Because if she screamed, she wouldn't be able to stop talking. And everyone would find out. Hazel walked up to Paige's desk.
"Paige! Hey!" she paused as she wrinkled her nose. "Um.. is the grunge look back or something?"
"Huh? Oh wait.. you mean my clothes right?" Hazel nodded. "I just felt like being comfortable, ok? I don't understand why it has to be such a big deal!" Paige said, practically shouting. Everyone stared at her again, and a knot welled up her throat. It felt as if there was huge neon sign above her head that said slut. All her muscles were tense, her back felt rigid, her neck muscles were knotted and aching. She cracked her fingers and bit her nails out of nervous anxiety. Hazel picked up her hand and looked at her now non-existent nails.
"Aw Paige.. hun did you have to do that? Your nails take so long to grow! After school I say you go get some acryllics with me?"
Paige sighed. "No Hazel, I don't think so-"
Hazel cut her off sharply. "Oh yeah, we have Spirit Squad!" she smacked herself lightly on the forehead. "I can't believe I forgot! Anyway.. I had something to tell you! Kay, well I was talking to Jimmy, and he said..."
As Hazel droned on, Paige nodded every once in a while, and smiled occasionally. But her mind was elsewhere, obviously. How was she gonna go to Spirit Squad? There was no way she could do it. She'd have to quit the squad. That was all there was to it. Suddenly Spinner walked into class.
"Gavin, you're late. That's the third time this month!" Ms.Kwan said, disappointed.
"Sorry Ms.Kwan." he said monotonously. As he walked by Paige's desk, her heart raced. Spinner smirked at her. "So, Paige, hows your sick Grandmother doing?"
Paige paled. "Umm.. she's... well.."
Spinner shot her a disgusted look. "Yeah, that's what I thought. Whatever Paige." he walked on over to his desk.
"Spinner.. wait! I'm sorry.. but.. I.. I.. just.. I just can't deal with this right now! I'm sorry... I'm sorry..." she said softly. Her head ached. She couldn't take this much longer. And this was only day one.
"Paige? Are you alright?" Hazel asked, looking at her warily.
Paige smiled weakly. "Umm.. yeah. I'm fine. Just a bit burned out."
Hazel laughed. "Yeah, I could tell. Anyway, so what happened with you and Deaaan?" she asked in a singsong voice.
Paige blanched. Her heart began thudding heavily in her chest. "Uh.. nothing. I.. I decided he's just not my type, you know?"
Hazel scoffed. "What? You were SO into him! He's fine, he's older, he likes you!"
Paige swallowed hard. "Well.. he's just not what I thought." she said quickly.
Now Hazel looked nervous. "Well, if you're not um into him anymore, you wouldn't care if I went for him?"
Paige's jaw-dropped. "Hazel! No! You can't go out with Dean!"
Hazel glared at her. "You said you're not into him! He's hot, he's older, good body, sweetie, like why should I stay away?"
Paige gave Hazel an even, level stare. "Maybe because I thought our friendship was worth more than that."
Hazel shrugged. "Fine. Whatever."
Hot tears burned in Paige's eyes. Already Spinner hated her, and now Hazel and her were on the brink of a fight. It was all too much to deal with. Letting out a soft moan, she lay her head down on her desk, and covered it with her arms.