A/N: Well more thank-yous again! This time I have to include see-the-light and OF COURSE SVU-Obsessed =) And to the rest of you, read and review, dammit! The reviews are really what make me want to write more. Just knowing that people enjoy my writing feels so unbelievably awesome =) So boost my ego some more guys :P Anyway, without any further adieu, here's chapter. Oh yeah, the chapters should now come out around once a week, hopefully. But they may take longer, so if you want some more good Paige rape stories, try After That Night, by SVU-Obsessed. NOw for real, I'm done!
Paige sighed. She did not need this right now. A confrontation from the wanna-be cheerleader and the tree-hugging hippy? Puh-lease. Any other day, she'd laugh their lame attempts to bring her down, but today wasn't any other day. And she had no idea why they would even be here, at her locker, so angry. What had she done lately? It was only Tuesday and this week had been hardly normal. It would take all her efforts to get rid of Manny and Emma, and Paige just wasn't sure if she had the energy inside her tired, depressed body. Summing up all her energy, Paige walked up to Emma and Manny and spoke.
"Umm.. why are you standing in front of my locker? Get out of my way, thanks." she said, in her classic Paige voice. It wasn't much, but it was truly a start. Manny looked at the floor, but Emma looked directly in her eyes, unwaivered. Paige tried to mentally prepare herself. Obviously this would be much harder than she had thought. Emma nudged Manny in her ribs, and Manny let out a sharp yelp.
"Manny..!" Emma groaned.
"Sorry! OK, umm.." Manny started shakily. She gained some confidence and continued. "Look. We're here to tell you to stay away from Craig."
Paige's jaw dropped. They had to be kidding. This was the whole problem? "When have I ever been around Craig beides that stupid skit?" Paige demanded angrily.
Now Emma jumped into the conversation. "Last night! We saw you walking out of his house, and we saw you wearing his sweater. Craig is Manny's, Paige! So just stay away!"
"So now you guys are stalking me too?" Paige rolled her eyes, gaining confidence as she spoke. All her anger towards Dean and the whole unbearable situation creeped into her voice, and it was slightly unfair, but hey, Manny and Emma were picking this fight with her. She was vaguely aware of a small crowd gathering around, but she ignored them all. They wanted a show? Well they were definitely going to get one.
"Anyway, I was just going to his house to house to get shelter from the rain. Not that it's any of your business. And besides, one pathetic little slow dance doesn't make him yours, not that Manny knows anything about guys, right?" she finished.
Manny's eyes filled with tears but she said nothing. On the other hand, Emma's eyes filled wih anger and disbelief. "Is that your excuse for going over to every guy's house? So Manny may not know much about guys, obviously you know more, you're a slut!"
The remark hit Paige like a slap in the face. The worst part was, it was true. But she couldn't let them know that. This was one battle she had to win. Paige wanted something, anything, to remind herself she was still Paige Michalchuk. She desperately wanted to hold onto her old life, and it was slipping away, fast. She had to hold onto something.
"You don't even know anything about me nevermind my love life!" Paige spat out angrily, pulling down on the bottom of her tank top. Slut. Slut. Slut. The word burned through her mind.
"I don't know anything? Really? So who was that guy I noticed you talking to after the soccer game? The one from Bardell? Why don't you tell me about him, Paige? And what about Spinner, what about him?
Dean. Emma was talking about Dean. The heartless bastard who had changed her life in a span of 20 minutes. And Spinner... Spinner the one who had what? What could have become of their relationship if she hadn't messed it up? Once again, tears of anger and frustration welled up in her eyes.
"Spinner? There was never anything between me and Spinner! Check your facts, hun." It hurt to much to address the Dean issue. In her mind she silently wished Emma would let it drop.
"Nothing? So that's why you stood him up on Saturday, huh? To go to some party while you told him some bullshit lie." Emma said, tilting her head to the side.
Paige gasped. The party. How could she know? How could she even find out?
"And how would you even know about that? Prying into my personal life?" Paige seethed.
"Actually, Kendra told Toby, and Toby told me. So sorry Paige, you loose. And now you've gotta add Craig to your list? Isn't two guys enough? I guess not for Paige Michalchuk, center of the universe." Emma said calmly.
For once, Paige was at a loss for words. There was a hushed silence as everyone waited for Paige to reply. Finally, she walked up right up to Emma and got very close to her face. "Listen.. you don't know anything about me. You think you know, but you have not the slightest idea. Don't ever judge me. You don't know what the hell I've been through." Then, a picture of poise , she walked away slowly, head held high.
Paige walked out the door of DCS, and she sat on the steps, resting her head on her knees. A single tear rolled down her cheek, and she made no effort to wipe it off. Instead, she just sat there, silent and unmoving.
Everything that had happened the past week flashed in her mind. She couldn't cry anymore. It wasn't possible. Her skin felt dry and cracked and her eyes were itchy. Sitting here, going over what had happened, over and over and over again made her feel sick to her stomach. She had to do something. She had to keep herself busy. Slowly, she stood up. Now it was time to walk to the drugstore and get a pregnancy test. Because Paige had to know the truth. *Oh come on... he used a condom.. I can't be pregnant. Why even bother taking a stupid test and getting scared?* she thought. Knowing nothing was better than knowing for sure. But still, Paige had to do it. It was lunch time, so she could leave. She started walking towards the Shoppers Drug Mart closest to her house, which was a good 30 minutes away. She walked slowly, afraid of what awaited her. Paige was vaguely aware that the results of the test could change her life forever, for the second time in less than a week. But what was there that she could do? Nothing. She couldn't go back into the past and change what happened, no matter how much she wished. All she could do was take everything as it came, and just deal with it.
15 minutes later, Paige passed by Bardell high school. Immediately a sick sense of dread washed over her, and she shuddered. It was lunch there too, and students walked around laughing and joking, looking unbelievably carefree and happy. Paige wondered if they knew there was a rapist among them? If they knew Dean, star soccer player had changed her life forever? Had he bragged about her to his friends, proud of what he did? Did he describe what happened in detail? Or had he mentioned it casually, just another one of his conquests? Was he feeling guilty? Did he understand what he had done to her? There were so many questions, and not any answers. It was the most frustrating, cycle Paige had ever been through. He shattered her heart, and now she was here, trying to pick up the pieces. Just the school itself made Paige feel sick and dirty, and she could still feel Dean's skin against her own.
Being there, by the school, where *he* was, made it all too real. Taking one last lingering look, Paige turned and continued on her way. Strangely enough, she couldn't cry. Not anymore. The tears would come back, but for now, all she felt was numbness. And in some ways, that was almost worse. Paige kept her eyes on the sidewalk and her Adidas superstars, until she finally reached the store. Nervously, she walked in. There weren't many customers, just mostly some senior citizens, and a few middle aged women. Paige definitely stuck out like a sore thumb. Cautiously, she walked into the aisle that sold Tampons and Maxi pads. She figured if anything, the pregnancy tests would be there as well. Paige was right. On the opposite side of the sanitary napkins, there were the tests. There were tons of them, different colours, different sizes, different boxes. Her brain swirled. How was she supposed to know which one to take? After a minute of thinking, Paige closed her eyes and grabbed. The first box she grabbed, she was gonna buy. Taking a deep breath, she looked at the box in her hands. It was as typical pregnancy test, with a smiling woman on the front, holding her postitive test happily. But what about the girls like her, who were dreading possibly being pregnant? What about the girls who were raped? Pregnancy wasn't always a joy. With those thoughts, Paige suddenly realized that lately she had been overanalyzing everything. The real Paige Michalchuk would never do that. Sighing, she walked towards the cashiers, clutching the box in her hand. The cashier was a cute older woman. Her name tag read Mabel. Mabel smiled happily at Paige. "Hello Sweetie! Do you have an Optimum card?" she asked cheerfully.
"No." Paige muttered, keeping her eyes focused on the exit.
Mabel was unfazed by her unenthusiastic response. "Well dearie, you know, getting one would be a great benefit! You can collect points and when you have enough, you save lots of money! And I'm not just saying that because I work here!" Mabel chattered, still not taking the box from Paige's hands. Paige just wanted her to ring up the stupid box so she could go home and find out if her life was even worse than she had previously thought. The test seemed to burn her hands, with shame and disgust.
"No, thanks." Paige was more impatient than ever. She tapped her foot rapidly.
"Well okay sugar." Finally Mabel took the box of her hands. She lifted the box up, slowly examining it. Paige gulped. "Oh honey, are you sure you need this?" Mabel asked gently.
A wave of irritation flashed over Paige. "Look." she said, through clenched teeth. "Just.Please.Ring.It.Up."
Clucking her tongue, Mabel scanned the box, mumbling under her breath something about "Kids these days. Babies having babies! Where is the sense in all this?"
Paige swallowed the bile that rose in her throat. *Trust me, it wasn't my choice!" her inner voice screamed. After an eternity, Mabel finally spoke. "That'll be $14.58" (A/N: I have NO idea how much prenancy tests cost, or what they look like, or anything, so excuse my naivete! =D)
Paige quickly handed Mabel her debit card. She really had to get going. In a minute, the transaction was complete. Mabel handed Paige her bag and Paige quickly said "Thanks" before running off. The walk from her house to Shoppers Drug Mart was usually only 5 minutes, But Paige sprinted home, and finished walked up her porch after only 2 minutes. She tore her key out of her bag and ran inside. To her surprise, yet again, her brother was home. Ignoring him, she ran up the stairs.
"Paige? What are you doing home?" Mike called after her.
"Early Dismissal!" She yelled back, still running. She ran into her room and threw the bag on the bed. Frantically, she ripped open the box and read the instructions. Now all that was left was taking the test...
Paige sighed. She did not need this right now. A confrontation from the wanna-be cheerleader and the tree-hugging hippy? Puh-lease. Any other day, she'd laugh their lame attempts to bring her down, but today wasn't any other day. And she had no idea why they would even be here, at her locker, so angry. What had she done lately? It was only Tuesday and this week had been hardly normal. It would take all her efforts to get rid of Manny and Emma, and Paige just wasn't sure if she had the energy inside her tired, depressed body. Summing up all her energy, Paige walked up to Emma and Manny and spoke.
"Umm.. why are you standing in front of my locker? Get out of my way, thanks." she said, in her classic Paige voice. It wasn't much, but it was truly a start. Manny looked at the floor, but Emma looked directly in her eyes, unwaivered. Paige tried to mentally prepare herself. Obviously this would be much harder than she had thought. Emma nudged Manny in her ribs, and Manny let out a sharp yelp.
"Manny..!" Emma groaned.
"Sorry! OK, umm.." Manny started shakily. She gained some confidence and continued. "Look. We're here to tell you to stay away from Craig."
Paige's jaw dropped. They had to be kidding. This was the whole problem? "When have I ever been around Craig beides that stupid skit?" Paige demanded angrily.
Now Emma jumped into the conversation. "Last night! We saw you walking out of his house, and we saw you wearing his sweater. Craig is Manny's, Paige! So just stay away!"
"So now you guys are stalking me too?" Paige rolled her eyes, gaining confidence as she spoke. All her anger towards Dean and the whole unbearable situation creeped into her voice, and it was slightly unfair, but hey, Manny and Emma were picking this fight with her. She was vaguely aware of a small crowd gathering around, but she ignored them all. They wanted a show? Well they were definitely going to get one.
"Anyway, I was just going to his house to house to get shelter from the rain. Not that it's any of your business. And besides, one pathetic little slow dance doesn't make him yours, not that Manny knows anything about guys, right?" she finished.
Manny's eyes filled with tears but she said nothing. On the other hand, Emma's eyes filled wih anger and disbelief. "Is that your excuse for going over to every guy's house? So Manny may not know much about guys, obviously you know more, you're a slut!"
The remark hit Paige like a slap in the face. The worst part was, it was true. But she couldn't let them know that. This was one battle she had to win. Paige wanted something, anything, to remind herself she was still Paige Michalchuk. She desperately wanted to hold onto her old life, and it was slipping away, fast. She had to hold onto something.
"You don't even know anything about me nevermind my love life!" Paige spat out angrily, pulling down on the bottom of her tank top. Slut. Slut. Slut. The word burned through her mind.
"I don't know anything? Really? So who was that guy I noticed you talking to after the soccer game? The one from Bardell? Why don't you tell me about him, Paige? And what about Spinner, what about him?
Dean. Emma was talking about Dean. The heartless bastard who had changed her life in a span of 20 minutes. And Spinner... Spinner the one who had what? What could have become of their relationship if she hadn't messed it up? Once again, tears of anger and frustration welled up in her eyes.
"Spinner? There was never anything between me and Spinner! Check your facts, hun." It hurt to much to address the Dean issue. In her mind she silently wished Emma would let it drop.
"Nothing? So that's why you stood him up on Saturday, huh? To go to some party while you told him some bullshit lie." Emma said, tilting her head to the side.
Paige gasped. The party. How could she know? How could she even find out?
"And how would you even know about that? Prying into my personal life?" Paige seethed.
"Actually, Kendra told Toby, and Toby told me. So sorry Paige, you loose. And now you've gotta add Craig to your list? Isn't two guys enough? I guess not for Paige Michalchuk, center of the universe." Emma said calmly.
For once, Paige was at a loss for words. There was a hushed silence as everyone waited for Paige to reply. Finally, she walked up right up to Emma and got very close to her face. "Listen.. you don't know anything about me. You think you know, but you have not the slightest idea. Don't ever judge me. You don't know what the hell I've been through." Then, a picture of poise , she walked away slowly, head held high.
Paige walked out the door of DCS, and she sat on the steps, resting her head on her knees. A single tear rolled down her cheek, and she made no effort to wipe it off. Instead, she just sat there, silent and unmoving.
Everything that had happened the past week flashed in her mind. She couldn't cry anymore. It wasn't possible. Her skin felt dry and cracked and her eyes were itchy. Sitting here, going over what had happened, over and over and over again made her feel sick to her stomach. She had to do something. She had to keep herself busy. Slowly, she stood up. Now it was time to walk to the drugstore and get a pregnancy test. Because Paige had to know the truth. *Oh come on... he used a condom.. I can't be pregnant. Why even bother taking a stupid test and getting scared?* she thought. Knowing nothing was better than knowing for sure. But still, Paige had to do it. It was lunch time, so she could leave. She started walking towards the Shoppers Drug Mart closest to her house, which was a good 30 minutes away. She walked slowly, afraid of what awaited her. Paige was vaguely aware that the results of the test could change her life forever, for the second time in less than a week. But what was there that she could do? Nothing. She couldn't go back into the past and change what happened, no matter how much she wished. All she could do was take everything as it came, and just deal with it.
15 minutes later, Paige passed by Bardell high school. Immediately a sick sense of dread washed over her, and she shuddered. It was lunch there too, and students walked around laughing and joking, looking unbelievably carefree and happy. Paige wondered if they knew there was a rapist among them? If they knew Dean, star soccer player had changed her life forever? Had he bragged about her to his friends, proud of what he did? Did he describe what happened in detail? Or had he mentioned it casually, just another one of his conquests? Was he feeling guilty? Did he understand what he had done to her? There were so many questions, and not any answers. It was the most frustrating, cycle Paige had ever been through. He shattered her heart, and now she was here, trying to pick up the pieces. Just the school itself made Paige feel sick and dirty, and she could still feel Dean's skin against her own.
Being there, by the school, where *he* was, made it all too real. Taking one last lingering look, Paige turned and continued on her way. Strangely enough, she couldn't cry. Not anymore. The tears would come back, but for now, all she felt was numbness. And in some ways, that was almost worse. Paige kept her eyes on the sidewalk and her Adidas superstars, until she finally reached the store. Nervously, she walked in. There weren't many customers, just mostly some senior citizens, and a few middle aged women. Paige definitely stuck out like a sore thumb. Cautiously, she walked into the aisle that sold Tampons and Maxi pads. She figured if anything, the pregnancy tests would be there as well. Paige was right. On the opposite side of the sanitary napkins, there were the tests. There were tons of them, different colours, different sizes, different boxes. Her brain swirled. How was she supposed to know which one to take? After a minute of thinking, Paige closed her eyes and grabbed. The first box she grabbed, she was gonna buy. Taking a deep breath, she looked at the box in her hands. It was as typical pregnancy test, with a smiling woman on the front, holding her postitive test happily. But what about the girls like her, who were dreading possibly being pregnant? What about the girls who were raped? Pregnancy wasn't always a joy. With those thoughts, Paige suddenly realized that lately she had been overanalyzing everything. The real Paige Michalchuk would never do that. Sighing, she walked towards the cashiers, clutching the box in her hand. The cashier was a cute older woman. Her name tag read Mabel. Mabel smiled happily at Paige. "Hello Sweetie! Do you have an Optimum card?" she asked cheerfully.
"No." Paige muttered, keeping her eyes focused on the exit.
Mabel was unfazed by her unenthusiastic response. "Well dearie, you know, getting one would be a great benefit! You can collect points and when you have enough, you save lots of money! And I'm not just saying that because I work here!" Mabel chattered, still not taking the box from Paige's hands. Paige just wanted her to ring up the stupid box so she could go home and find out if her life was even worse than she had previously thought. The test seemed to burn her hands, with shame and disgust.
"No, thanks." Paige was more impatient than ever. She tapped her foot rapidly.
"Well okay sugar." Finally Mabel took the box of her hands. She lifted the box up, slowly examining it. Paige gulped. "Oh honey, are you sure you need this?" Mabel asked gently.
A wave of irritation flashed over Paige. "Look." she said, through clenched teeth. "Just.Please.Ring.It.Up."
Clucking her tongue, Mabel scanned the box, mumbling under her breath something about "Kids these days. Babies having babies! Where is the sense in all this?"
Paige swallowed the bile that rose in her throat. *Trust me, it wasn't my choice!" her inner voice screamed. After an eternity, Mabel finally spoke. "That'll be $14.58" (A/N: I have NO idea how much prenancy tests cost, or what they look like, or anything, so excuse my naivete! =D)
Paige quickly handed Mabel her debit card. She really had to get going. In a minute, the transaction was complete. Mabel handed Paige her bag and Paige quickly said "Thanks" before running off. The walk from her house to Shoppers Drug Mart was usually only 5 minutes, But Paige sprinted home, and finished walked up her porch after only 2 minutes. She tore her key out of her bag and ran inside. To her surprise, yet again, her brother was home. Ignoring him, she ran up the stairs.
"Paige? What are you doing home?" Mike called after her.
"Early Dismissal!" She yelled back, still running. She ran into her room and threw the bag on the bed. Frantically, she ripped open the box and read the instructions. Now all that was left was taking the test...