Part Two
Chapter Three; FBI in the Labyrinth
Cooper walked behind a frighteningly freaked out Agent Phillip Jefferies. Phillip was fast loosing it and kept muttering with his gun clenched in white knuckles as they walked down the hill towards the labyrinth.
"Fucking bastard… What the fuck is this goddamned place…? Fucking maze… Ain't nothing like the fucking corn mazes back in Nebraska… What did he call himself again Coop?"
"The Goblin King, Jareth."
"Fucking Jareth… What the hell kind of name is Jareth?"
"Actually, Phil, it means, one born of royal blood, but with flaws or problems of the genitalia."
Jefferies laughed a crazy laugh.
"Serves the fucking bastard right… You're a fucking know it all Coop." Jefferies said between hysterical giggles.
While conversing, the two had approached the large door that presumably led into the maze. Upon inspection they discovered no doorknob. ((Ah doorknob… my favorite word))
"Well how the hell are we supposed to get in?" Jefferies asked the door. Cooper taped him on the shoulder and pointed.
"Maybe he knows."
Over in the corner of a very dead garden a dwarf was pruning very dead rose bushes with a rusted pair of hedge-shears. And much like Jefferies was muttering obscenities under his breath. Jefferies strode over.
"Hey, Bilbo, you know how to get into this here maze?"
The dwarf freaked, and started muttering something incoherent. Jefferies was wondering if it was dwarf mumbo-jumbo until the ever calm Cooper answered him.
"No, we just want to know how to get into the labyrinth." Cooper turned to Jefferies and spoke then, with his school boy grin. "He thinks you're the Goblin King."
"That's a riot. Tell him I grew up in Nebraska with an English pop, a redneck mom, and I've never adducted any babies."
"Gaw… Well why didn'a ya say so. M' names Hoggle. I'm th' gardener, an Jareth's personal pest control."
"And a smashing good job of gardening you have here Bilbo. Now how do we get into the labyrinth?"
"Is you sure you're not the Goblin King… Ya's look an awful lot like 'em."
"Quite sure… Now how do we get in."
"Well… ya gets in there." As Hoggle pointed to the gigantic doors they opened on hidden hinges.
"Well thank you Bilbo." Jefferies intoned as he started for the doors. Cooper followed him. They entered and looked in two different directions. All they saw was an apparently never-ending corridor that led left to right. Hoggle waddled in behind them.
"Cozy ain't it?" He asked.
"Hmm." Jefferies answered.
"Now would you's go left or right?"
"They both look the same." Jefferies answered.
"Shows what you know… You two won't make it very far if ya keep thinkin like that."
"Which way would you go?" Cooper asked.
"Me… Well I wouldn't go any way. I gots m' brain in the right place."
"Just tell us which way to go Bilbo or I swear I'll rip you end to end." Jefferies threatened.
"M' names not Bilbo it's HOGGEL! An what do I's look like a hired guide… I ain't goin in there… You sure you's not the King?"
Phil clenched his fist and shook it at the dwarf.
"Why I outta…"
"Now, now Phil. We have work to do." Coop reminded him.
"Yeah you're right Coop… I just hope he's not the same dwarf you kept seeing during the Palmer case."
"He's not the dwarf from the Palmer case. The dwarf from that case had a rounder head and a red suit."
"You're fucking weird Coop you know that?"
"You keep saying that Phil." Dale began looking around. "But it seems we're in a pretty weird place."
"Come on let's get going. We only have seven hours"
Together they started walking the corridor. They didn't get very far before they heard a tiny voice.
"Ello…"
Jefferies looked around twisting in circles. Cooper simply squatted down and began studying the wall. Jefferies looked at him.
"What are you doing Coop?" Phil asked.
"Look at this." Cooper pointed to a little blue worm.
"Eww… What is it?"
"Who me?" The worm asked. "I'm just a worm."
"Dale, tell me it didn't just talk. Please tell me it didn't just talk"
"Okay, it didn't just talk."
"Oh fucking shit Coop… the worm just talked." Jefferies pulled his gun and pointed it at the worm. "Should I shoot it?"
"No. It's just a worm."
"Tha's right… I'm just a worm. Would ya like ta come in and meet th' Misses?"
"No thank you." Cooper said. "You wouldn't by any chance know how to get into the main part of the labyrinth would you?"
"W sure… you jus got ta walk through th' wall over there." The little worm said.
"Walk through the wall he says… Coooooop tell me I'm loosing my mind." Jefferies pulled his hand to his head and pressed the side of the gun to his forehead. It's muzzle pointing to the slightly orange sky.
Cooper didn't tell Phillip that he was loosing his mind. Instead he walked over to the wall and disappeared. A second later his head popped around the corner and said,
"You coming Phil?"
Phillip Jefferies unwillingly followed. The entire spectacle of the labyrinth opened up before them, and Jefferies couldn't help but gasp.
"My god… Where do we begin?"
"Were every good story begins, at the beginning."
Chapter Three; FBI in the Labyrinth
Cooper walked behind a frighteningly freaked out Agent Phillip Jefferies. Phillip was fast loosing it and kept muttering with his gun clenched in white knuckles as they walked down the hill towards the labyrinth.
"Fucking bastard… What the fuck is this goddamned place…? Fucking maze… Ain't nothing like the fucking corn mazes back in Nebraska… What did he call himself again Coop?"
"The Goblin King, Jareth."
"Fucking Jareth… What the hell kind of name is Jareth?"
"Actually, Phil, it means, one born of royal blood, but with flaws or problems of the genitalia."
Jefferies laughed a crazy laugh.
"Serves the fucking bastard right… You're a fucking know it all Coop." Jefferies said between hysterical giggles.
While conversing, the two had approached the large door that presumably led into the maze. Upon inspection they discovered no doorknob. ((Ah doorknob… my favorite word))
"Well how the hell are we supposed to get in?" Jefferies asked the door. Cooper taped him on the shoulder and pointed.
"Maybe he knows."
Over in the corner of a very dead garden a dwarf was pruning very dead rose bushes with a rusted pair of hedge-shears. And much like Jefferies was muttering obscenities under his breath. Jefferies strode over.
"Hey, Bilbo, you know how to get into this here maze?"
The dwarf freaked, and started muttering something incoherent. Jefferies was wondering if it was dwarf mumbo-jumbo until the ever calm Cooper answered him.
"No, we just want to know how to get into the labyrinth." Cooper turned to Jefferies and spoke then, with his school boy grin. "He thinks you're the Goblin King."
"That's a riot. Tell him I grew up in Nebraska with an English pop, a redneck mom, and I've never adducted any babies."
"Gaw… Well why didn'a ya say so. M' names Hoggle. I'm th' gardener, an Jareth's personal pest control."
"And a smashing good job of gardening you have here Bilbo. Now how do we get into the labyrinth?"
"Is you sure you're not the Goblin King… Ya's look an awful lot like 'em."
"Quite sure… Now how do we get in."
"Well… ya gets in there." As Hoggle pointed to the gigantic doors they opened on hidden hinges.
"Well thank you Bilbo." Jefferies intoned as he started for the doors. Cooper followed him. They entered and looked in two different directions. All they saw was an apparently never-ending corridor that led left to right. Hoggle waddled in behind them.
"Cozy ain't it?" He asked.
"Hmm." Jefferies answered.
"Now would you's go left or right?"
"They both look the same." Jefferies answered.
"Shows what you know… You two won't make it very far if ya keep thinkin like that."
"Which way would you go?" Cooper asked.
"Me… Well I wouldn't go any way. I gots m' brain in the right place."
"Just tell us which way to go Bilbo or I swear I'll rip you end to end." Jefferies threatened.
"M' names not Bilbo it's HOGGEL! An what do I's look like a hired guide… I ain't goin in there… You sure you's not the King?"
Phil clenched his fist and shook it at the dwarf.
"Why I outta…"
"Now, now Phil. We have work to do." Coop reminded him.
"Yeah you're right Coop… I just hope he's not the same dwarf you kept seeing during the Palmer case."
"He's not the dwarf from the Palmer case. The dwarf from that case had a rounder head and a red suit."
"You're fucking weird Coop you know that?"
"You keep saying that Phil." Dale began looking around. "But it seems we're in a pretty weird place."
"Come on let's get going. We only have seven hours"
Together they started walking the corridor. They didn't get very far before they heard a tiny voice.
"Ello…"
Jefferies looked around twisting in circles. Cooper simply squatted down and began studying the wall. Jefferies looked at him.
"What are you doing Coop?" Phil asked.
"Look at this." Cooper pointed to a little blue worm.
"Eww… What is it?"
"Who me?" The worm asked. "I'm just a worm."
"Dale, tell me it didn't just talk. Please tell me it didn't just talk"
"Okay, it didn't just talk."
"Oh fucking shit Coop… the worm just talked." Jefferies pulled his gun and pointed it at the worm. "Should I shoot it?"
"No. It's just a worm."
"Tha's right… I'm just a worm. Would ya like ta come in and meet th' Misses?"
"No thank you." Cooper said. "You wouldn't by any chance know how to get into the main part of the labyrinth would you?"
"W sure… you jus got ta walk through th' wall over there." The little worm said.
"Walk through the wall he says… Coooooop tell me I'm loosing my mind." Jefferies pulled his hand to his head and pressed the side of the gun to his forehead. It's muzzle pointing to the slightly orange sky.
Cooper didn't tell Phillip that he was loosing his mind. Instead he walked over to the wall and disappeared. A second later his head popped around the corner and said,
"You coming Phil?"
Phillip Jefferies unwillingly followed. The entire spectacle of the labyrinth opened up before them, and Jefferies couldn't help but gasp.
"My god… Where do we begin?"
"Were every good story begins, at the beginning."