Title: Touch
Summary: Ryan is not perfect.
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters etc. etc.
This has slash implications and is of taboo subject matter, so don't read it and then bitch at me later. If you think it's wrong, don't read it.
You started spending less and less time at home when your mom got a new boyfriend when you were only eleven. Eleven years old and you could tell there was something in his eyes that looked like evil. Kids always know when they see danger. You tried to push the feeling down, but the night he came to your room, drunk and stinking, you knew you'd been justified.
It didn't last long and at first you were too scared to even open your eyes and then you weren't even sure what had happened. You were used to cruel fists and nasty remarks. You weren't used to rough words and exploring hands.
Your mom thought he was perfect. He played his part when she was around, buying Trey and you baseball Mits and candy. If only she knew --and you had a sinking suspicion she did. She must have seen how red your skin looked after a bath as you tried to wipe him away. She must have seen the bruises on your back and hips the size of fingerprints. She must have known.
It was Bobby Donaldson's window you climbed into when the dreams were too harsh to sleep through at twelve. Your mom had finally gotten rid of that boyfriend and exchanged him for anotherthat was rougher, and hit you harder.
Bobby used to wipe off your bloody noses and blot at your bloody lips, and one night, when it rained, he helped you undress. What came next was an awakening. You learned that touch didn't have to hurt as Bobby soothed away all the aches and pains on your body. He kissed you softly and you cried, because, for once, touch didn't hurt.
When you moved away, you never thought you'd find anyone like Bobby again. You were wrong. Seth is like Bobby in a lot of ways. They both knew just what to say and how to take care of you... How to touch you in the exact right place to break the dam you've built for your tears.
But you won't go beyond a comforting embrace with Seth. Because he looks at you and can't see the scars that dot your chest. He can't see the bruises that live inside you and he pretends the bruises on your face aren't there.
You let Luke hit you because that's what you're used to; that's what feels normal. The kindness you see in Seth's eyes scares the shit out of you; it feels foreign. No one has ever looked at you like that except for Bobby... and he was taken away from you.
You can't be with Seth because you're broken and he deserves better. He thinks you're perfect and you never want him to find out the truth.
End.