Wow, it's been a long time since the last chapter. I'm truly sorry for
that, and I beg your forgiveness; I could go on to name everything that has
stood in my way since the last chapter, but I doubt you're interested in
that and it would take far too long (exams, job hunting, job interviews, an
actual job, a funeral, various problems at home, getting sick, and a
general lack of creativeness to name but a few). Hopefully you haven't all
decided that the wait has been too long and you're now no longer interested
in the fic. Comments about this chapter can be found at the end, enjoy!
Oh yeah, I don't own the characters.
Chapter 5: Revelations, Good and Bad
Ringing. The phone is ringing.
I emit a sound halfway between a grunt and a sigh as I turn onto my side to grab the phone off of my nightstand to put an end to the torture. I throw a quick glance at the clock: 6:48.
A.M.
On a Saturday.
Who the fuck calls at 6:48 on a Saturday morning? Whoever they are, they deserve to die a slow and painful death.
"Hello?" God my voice sounds hoarse, even to me. I suppose it's normal however, I haven't spoken in maybe twelve hours.
"Kall? Did I wake you?" That voice is a gift from the heavens, it truly is a God send. I'd gladly never sleep again if I could hear his voice say my name everyday for the rest of my life. "I'm sorry." He doesn't sound very sorry, but that's okay with me, he's Lucié after all, I'd forgive him anything, I'd even forgive him if he killed me.
He launches himself at his opponent, about to strike the finishing blow, when he sees that the other man closes his eyes and calmly awaits death. He widens his eyes in surprise, this was not expected. He tips his wrist, changing the direction of the sword, and impales himself on the sword.
Why am I remembering that dream now? Now's not the time.
"Lucié? It's okay, I was going to get up in a couple of minutes anyway," I am such a liar, but it's worth it if it means Lucié doesn't have to suffer any guilt. Not that he would suffer any guilt because of me; I'm too insignificant.
"Oh, good. Do you normally get up at this hour on Saturdays? That's. insane."
"I don't think the person calling me at this hour has much of a right to call me insane for being up at this hour." Not that I was up, which is the first time in a long time, the first night where I wasn't plagued of dreams of the Adonis presently talking to me.
"Good point, but I wouldn't be awake now if it weren't for my neighbors. They're going out of town for the day and would like me to keep an eye on their son, and I just can't say no to them, so would you mind if I brought him over? He's eight years old, old enough to occupy himself alone, but not old enough to be left alone." He actually sounds like he's pleading, as if he thinks I could deny him anything. Oh how little you know me Lucié.
"Of course you can bring him over, though I'm not too sure what he can do here. My sisters are going to be gone, so there isn't going to be anyone around to play with him or anything."
"That's okay!" There's such joy in his voice, I can't believe that I'm the one who put it there. "I'll bring something for him to do over with us. Thanks a lot Kall."
"No problem, and it's Kall Su."
He lets go a short laugh and says a quick goodbye before hanging up. I can't believe I just had a normal conversation with Lucié! I didn't screw up or anything, I'm so happy, I'm just bursting with energy. I guess I won't be able to fall asleep again, might as well and get up to prepare for the day, after all, the groups is arriving in. a little over two hours. God I'm going to be bored for the next two hours.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Lucié is the last to arrive, and when he does, he has a short kid trailing behind him, looking lost and confused. I immediately feel protective of the child, feeling a sort of kinship with him due to his confused state, after all, I'm perpetually lost and confused. Of course I only show this by offering a small smile; children don't exactly put me at ease. He doesn't seem at all offended by my lack of a reception seeing as how he is at once being coddled by Yohko and Arshes.
He's short for his age, even I who don't spend time with children can tell that. His short hair is of a soft brown color, and is in disarray. His chocolate eyes are large and innocent, taking the whole world in, but probably not seeing it for what it truly is.
"This is Rushe, my neighbor." Lucié says while looking at the young boy fondly. Why can't he look at me like that? Why can't he look at me at all?
Leaving the girls to smother Rushe some more, Gara, Lucié and myself sit down around the coffee table and prepare to get ready.
"Why is it that girls always go googly eyed around a kid?" Gara asks while watching Ashes and Yohko out of the corner of his eye as Rushe shows them the homework he has to do.
"I don't know about the googly eyed part, but I can't blame them for liking kids. I think kids are kind of fun to be around." Lucié answers with a wistful look in his eyes. I have to fight back the urge to get up and throw the kid out the window. I know Lucié wouldn't appreciate it, but I can't stand having him look at Rushe like that and not me. So much for being protective of the little twerp.
"Sounds like you want some kids," Gara comments. Why can't you keep your mouth shut you stupid oaf? "Yeah, someday I'd like to have some." He doesn't even look embarrassed as he admits this, are all guys supposed to be embarrassed about having a soft side? "What about you Kall? Do you want kids?"
What about me? Do I want kids? Fuck no! I want you, not some stupid brat hell bent on making my life hell. But I'll never have you, will I? You would never feel the same as me, and even if by some miracle you might be slightly interested in me, I can't offer you something you seem to hold dearly: children. God Kall, keep it together, don't break down in front of them, in front of him. "I'm. I'm not sure; I don't really have a lot of experience around kids, so. I don't quite know how I feel about them."
"You don't have a lot of experience around kids? But don't you have two younger sisters?" Gara asks looking completely confused. Why am I not surprised that that look suits him so well? Dumb jock.
"I.. It's not as simple as that." I reply in a low voice, trying to control my emotions, and evading their eyes.
I think that Lucié understands because he nods to himself with a look of deep contemplation in his eyes as he changes the subject, "So, shall we get started?"
With that, everyone gathered around the table to work, except for Rushe who set himself up at my desk to work on his French grammar homework. The day went by quickly and smoothly; we only paused to order a pizza for lunch. I managed not to make a fool of myself, or at least I think I did, though my treacherous eyes were constantly drifting back to Lucié, nearly exposing me several times. I couldn't keep them from tracing the outline of his body, of staring into his eyes, of watching his hands as he wrote. I can't stop the feelings, no matter how futile I know them to be.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
It's the evening when everyone is leaving, but the sun is still up, shining in the sky despite my desperately morose mood. Yohko and Arshes leave together while giggling; those two have been acting friendly towards each other, and quite frankly it's scary. They're probably plotting some way of getting Lucié and splitting him between the both of them. I wonder if I can get in on the deal? No! Bad Kall Su! If they find out you like Lucié, they'll tell the whole school, then everyone will be laughing at you, and even worse, Lucié will be repulsed. No, it's better to just keep these things to yourself.
Gara left a couple of minutes after them, muttering something about renting some Bruce Lee movies so that he could get in character. Now there's a scary idea, a dumb jock that can kick your ass using something other than brute strength: talent.
"Do you mind if I stay a bit longer? Rushe is sleeping and I don't want to disturb him by waking him." Lucié asks, drawing me from my contemplation of Gara the ninja master. I turn to see Rushe slumped over my desk and snoring softly. It's almost cute.
"Not at all, you can stay as long as you like." God, was I over enthusiastic or what?
"Thanks." He replies with a soft smile, the most angelic sight I had ever seen in my entire life. I do believe I've seen true beauty now.
Lucié starts perusing my bookshelves every so often taking a book out to examine it closer. "You have a lot of history books."
"I. I like history, it helps one to understand how the world is today, and at the same time, it's like a whole different world." Can we say nerd? Nerd. Very good Kall, maybe you're not such a retard after all.
"Hm, I think I understand, don't quite feel the same, but I understand how you could feel that way." He has an open mind; he can accept views other than his own!! Maybe there is a chance for me yet. Oh give it up already you ninny. He gets a thoughtful look in his ocean blue eyes as he continues, "Can you keep a secret?"
Now that surprises me, he wants to tell me something he's never told anyone else? Is he gay? Is he contemplating getting a sex change? Is he really an angel? Is he depressed and looking for a way out? Is he Rushe's father? Wait, that last one doesn't make sense. Rushe is eight, Lucié is 17. That doesn't add up.
"I can't grasp history for some reason, maybe I don't have the patience for it, but I just can't do well in that subject. It's the only subject I've come close to failing, and each year it's getting worse, like I'm realizing the futility of it all and am slowly giving up." He has a far away look in his eyes. If he weren't talking about history class, I might be moved, even call him somewhat poetic.
"Don't you think you're taking this a bit too seriously? It's just a class." Uhoh, did I just insult him? Stupid! You want him to like you and you insult him? I take it back, you are a retard!! "But," I say quickly hoping to fix all the damage I've already created, if that's possible, "I can understand how a class can be important. If you ever need help, I'd be willing to tutor you in history, that is, only if you want help." I trail off no longer sure about what I'm saying.
"Really?" He looks really excited, like a kid who was just told he's going to Disneyland. Did I just make him that happy? Impossible. "I'd really appreciate the help. If you have anything you want me to help you with, just let me know." He's grinning ear to ear now, I wonder if his face will crack? I certainly hope not, I rather like his face.
Just as I'm about to reply, a weak "Lucié?" Comes from behind us. Rushe is awake and wants to go home now.
"I guess we should get going, see you Monday Kall!" Lucié says in parting. He's already out the door before I could correct him on my name.
I'm going to tutor Lucié though! It means I'll get to spend more time with him, just the two of us! But. He obviously isn't interested in me, so why should I bother? Won't it hurt more to be near him.?
I watch from the window of my room as lucié gently lifts Rushe into the Blazer. I suppose, if I get to see Lucié happy, and I get to be his friend, I can't really ask for more and should content myself with that. It may be painful at times, but it's what will be best for Lucié, and that's all that matters. He deserves happiness.
End Chapter 5.
Next chapter: Abygail makes an appearance (I have to check the spelling of his name) The group reads their poems for their English class
I was hoping to get more plot development in this, but I wanted to get back into the hang of writing from Kall Su's point of view, so it's still more introspective. I'm hoping that the next chapter will have more to it than this.
On a side note, I'm sorry for bashing Gara, I really like him, but there is a purpose to this, you'll see later.
Also, I felt like throwing in some comparisons of Lucié/Dark Schneider to angels, I felt it was somewhat ironic. Anyone who's read volumes 18 and higher I think will understand that better.
Response to reviews from chapter 4 (which are much appreciated and truly give me the will to write, without them, I doubt this chapter would exist)
Zuzanny - Your wish is my command.
Sephiroth Strife2 - That's so nice, I think my ego just doubled in size.
plink - I'm sorry about there not being much Darshe/Kall, but I'm going to do my best for there to be more in the nest chapter. And there will be a lot more reality blending too.
Chibi Vicious - I hope you haven't died. That was one long wait. I'm sowwy! *Tries to look cute so she isn't lynched*
Elizabeth Whittaker - Tell me when you write it, I will definitely want to read it. If you need a bouncing board, feel free to use me. Why does that sound so wrong? -_-'
Asuka Kureru - The dreams aren't as simple as they seem, and hopefully they're not what everyone is thinking they are, that's all I'm saying about them. I sometimes feel bad for Kall Su, making him so insecure, but I just can't help it. As for the confession, nothing major, just that Lucié sucks at history, sorry, no declarations of undying love.
P1 - I'm glad you like it, and look! It's updated!! Of course if you're reading this you already know that it's updated..
icediamond - I'll try to bring Kall's family into the next chapter. I'm trying to keep the characters somewhat similar to the manga, and in the manga Kall was heavily influenced by his family, which though it may not show yet, he is in this as well, but he didn't exactly have the best family in the manga either.
Tara Smith - I think the reason you can identify with Kall Su is because he's based on a real person, though he is slowly moving away from that person, there are a lot of aspects about him that are taken from a real person, including his love for history. And yes, Kall is gay. Or at the very least he's bi; either way, he's obsessed with Darshe, his exact sexual orientation will be discussed later, for the moment, just know that he digs guys, specifically he wants to bonk Lucié, and he may dig girls, he's never mentioned them before, but that doesn't rule them out.
Chibi Dark Schneider - I'd be afraid for my life if you hadn't added 'Liv long and prosper! ^_^*' at the end. The story is updated as you can see, and as for being finished, that's not going to happen for a long time yet, though I'll hopefully update more often.
Oh yeah, I don't own the characters.
Chapter 5: Revelations, Good and Bad
Ringing. The phone is ringing.
I emit a sound halfway between a grunt and a sigh as I turn onto my side to grab the phone off of my nightstand to put an end to the torture. I throw a quick glance at the clock: 6:48.
A.M.
On a Saturday.
Who the fuck calls at 6:48 on a Saturday morning? Whoever they are, they deserve to die a slow and painful death.
"Hello?" God my voice sounds hoarse, even to me. I suppose it's normal however, I haven't spoken in maybe twelve hours.
"Kall? Did I wake you?" That voice is a gift from the heavens, it truly is a God send. I'd gladly never sleep again if I could hear his voice say my name everyday for the rest of my life. "I'm sorry." He doesn't sound very sorry, but that's okay with me, he's Lucié after all, I'd forgive him anything, I'd even forgive him if he killed me.
He launches himself at his opponent, about to strike the finishing blow, when he sees that the other man closes his eyes and calmly awaits death. He widens his eyes in surprise, this was not expected. He tips his wrist, changing the direction of the sword, and impales himself on the sword.
Why am I remembering that dream now? Now's not the time.
"Lucié? It's okay, I was going to get up in a couple of minutes anyway," I am such a liar, but it's worth it if it means Lucié doesn't have to suffer any guilt. Not that he would suffer any guilt because of me; I'm too insignificant.
"Oh, good. Do you normally get up at this hour on Saturdays? That's. insane."
"I don't think the person calling me at this hour has much of a right to call me insane for being up at this hour." Not that I was up, which is the first time in a long time, the first night where I wasn't plagued of dreams of the Adonis presently talking to me.
"Good point, but I wouldn't be awake now if it weren't for my neighbors. They're going out of town for the day and would like me to keep an eye on their son, and I just can't say no to them, so would you mind if I brought him over? He's eight years old, old enough to occupy himself alone, but not old enough to be left alone." He actually sounds like he's pleading, as if he thinks I could deny him anything. Oh how little you know me Lucié.
"Of course you can bring him over, though I'm not too sure what he can do here. My sisters are going to be gone, so there isn't going to be anyone around to play with him or anything."
"That's okay!" There's such joy in his voice, I can't believe that I'm the one who put it there. "I'll bring something for him to do over with us. Thanks a lot Kall."
"No problem, and it's Kall Su."
He lets go a short laugh and says a quick goodbye before hanging up. I can't believe I just had a normal conversation with Lucié! I didn't screw up or anything, I'm so happy, I'm just bursting with energy. I guess I won't be able to fall asleep again, might as well and get up to prepare for the day, after all, the groups is arriving in. a little over two hours. God I'm going to be bored for the next two hours.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Lucié is the last to arrive, and when he does, he has a short kid trailing behind him, looking lost and confused. I immediately feel protective of the child, feeling a sort of kinship with him due to his confused state, after all, I'm perpetually lost and confused. Of course I only show this by offering a small smile; children don't exactly put me at ease. He doesn't seem at all offended by my lack of a reception seeing as how he is at once being coddled by Yohko and Arshes.
He's short for his age, even I who don't spend time with children can tell that. His short hair is of a soft brown color, and is in disarray. His chocolate eyes are large and innocent, taking the whole world in, but probably not seeing it for what it truly is.
"This is Rushe, my neighbor." Lucié says while looking at the young boy fondly. Why can't he look at me like that? Why can't he look at me at all?
Leaving the girls to smother Rushe some more, Gara, Lucié and myself sit down around the coffee table and prepare to get ready.
"Why is it that girls always go googly eyed around a kid?" Gara asks while watching Ashes and Yohko out of the corner of his eye as Rushe shows them the homework he has to do.
"I don't know about the googly eyed part, but I can't blame them for liking kids. I think kids are kind of fun to be around." Lucié answers with a wistful look in his eyes. I have to fight back the urge to get up and throw the kid out the window. I know Lucié wouldn't appreciate it, but I can't stand having him look at Rushe like that and not me. So much for being protective of the little twerp.
"Sounds like you want some kids," Gara comments. Why can't you keep your mouth shut you stupid oaf? "Yeah, someday I'd like to have some." He doesn't even look embarrassed as he admits this, are all guys supposed to be embarrassed about having a soft side? "What about you Kall? Do you want kids?"
What about me? Do I want kids? Fuck no! I want you, not some stupid brat hell bent on making my life hell. But I'll never have you, will I? You would never feel the same as me, and even if by some miracle you might be slightly interested in me, I can't offer you something you seem to hold dearly: children. God Kall, keep it together, don't break down in front of them, in front of him. "I'm. I'm not sure; I don't really have a lot of experience around kids, so. I don't quite know how I feel about them."
"You don't have a lot of experience around kids? But don't you have two younger sisters?" Gara asks looking completely confused. Why am I not surprised that that look suits him so well? Dumb jock.
"I.. It's not as simple as that." I reply in a low voice, trying to control my emotions, and evading their eyes.
I think that Lucié understands because he nods to himself with a look of deep contemplation in his eyes as he changes the subject, "So, shall we get started?"
With that, everyone gathered around the table to work, except for Rushe who set himself up at my desk to work on his French grammar homework. The day went by quickly and smoothly; we only paused to order a pizza for lunch. I managed not to make a fool of myself, or at least I think I did, though my treacherous eyes were constantly drifting back to Lucié, nearly exposing me several times. I couldn't keep them from tracing the outline of his body, of staring into his eyes, of watching his hands as he wrote. I can't stop the feelings, no matter how futile I know them to be.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
It's the evening when everyone is leaving, but the sun is still up, shining in the sky despite my desperately morose mood. Yohko and Arshes leave together while giggling; those two have been acting friendly towards each other, and quite frankly it's scary. They're probably plotting some way of getting Lucié and splitting him between the both of them. I wonder if I can get in on the deal? No! Bad Kall Su! If they find out you like Lucié, they'll tell the whole school, then everyone will be laughing at you, and even worse, Lucié will be repulsed. No, it's better to just keep these things to yourself.
Gara left a couple of minutes after them, muttering something about renting some Bruce Lee movies so that he could get in character. Now there's a scary idea, a dumb jock that can kick your ass using something other than brute strength: talent.
"Do you mind if I stay a bit longer? Rushe is sleeping and I don't want to disturb him by waking him." Lucié asks, drawing me from my contemplation of Gara the ninja master. I turn to see Rushe slumped over my desk and snoring softly. It's almost cute.
"Not at all, you can stay as long as you like." God, was I over enthusiastic or what?
"Thanks." He replies with a soft smile, the most angelic sight I had ever seen in my entire life. I do believe I've seen true beauty now.
Lucié starts perusing my bookshelves every so often taking a book out to examine it closer. "You have a lot of history books."
"I. I like history, it helps one to understand how the world is today, and at the same time, it's like a whole different world." Can we say nerd? Nerd. Very good Kall, maybe you're not such a retard after all.
"Hm, I think I understand, don't quite feel the same, but I understand how you could feel that way." He has an open mind; he can accept views other than his own!! Maybe there is a chance for me yet. Oh give it up already you ninny. He gets a thoughtful look in his ocean blue eyes as he continues, "Can you keep a secret?"
Now that surprises me, he wants to tell me something he's never told anyone else? Is he gay? Is he contemplating getting a sex change? Is he really an angel? Is he depressed and looking for a way out? Is he Rushe's father? Wait, that last one doesn't make sense. Rushe is eight, Lucié is 17. That doesn't add up.
"I can't grasp history for some reason, maybe I don't have the patience for it, but I just can't do well in that subject. It's the only subject I've come close to failing, and each year it's getting worse, like I'm realizing the futility of it all and am slowly giving up." He has a far away look in his eyes. If he weren't talking about history class, I might be moved, even call him somewhat poetic.
"Don't you think you're taking this a bit too seriously? It's just a class." Uhoh, did I just insult him? Stupid! You want him to like you and you insult him? I take it back, you are a retard!! "But," I say quickly hoping to fix all the damage I've already created, if that's possible, "I can understand how a class can be important. If you ever need help, I'd be willing to tutor you in history, that is, only if you want help." I trail off no longer sure about what I'm saying.
"Really?" He looks really excited, like a kid who was just told he's going to Disneyland. Did I just make him that happy? Impossible. "I'd really appreciate the help. If you have anything you want me to help you with, just let me know." He's grinning ear to ear now, I wonder if his face will crack? I certainly hope not, I rather like his face.
Just as I'm about to reply, a weak "Lucié?" Comes from behind us. Rushe is awake and wants to go home now.
"I guess we should get going, see you Monday Kall!" Lucié says in parting. He's already out the door before I could correct him on my name.
I'm going to tutor Lucié though! It means I'll get to spend more time with him, just the two of us! But. He obviously isn't interested in me, so why should I bother? Won't it hurt more to be near him.?
I watch from the window of my room as lucié gently lifts Rushe into the Blazer. I suppose, if I get to see Lucié happy, and I get to be his friend, I can't really ask for more and should content myself with that. It may be painful at times, but it's what will be best for Lucié, and that's all that matters. He deserves happiness.
End Chapter 5.
Next chapter: Abygail makes an appearance (I have to check the spelling of his name) The group reads their poems for their English class
I was hoping to get more plot development in this, but I wanted to get back into the hang of writing from Kall Su's point of view, so it's still more introspective. I'm hoping that the next chapter will have more to it than this.
On a side note, I'm sorry for bashing Gara, I really like him, but there is a purpose to this, you'll see later.
Also, I felt like throwing in some comparisons of Lucié/Dark Schneider to angels, I felt it was somewhat ironic. Anyone who's read volumes 18 and higher I think will understand that better.
Response to reviews from chapter 4 (which are much appreciated and truly give me the will to write, without them, I doubt this chapter would exist)
Zuzanny - Your wish is my command.
Sephiroth Strife2 - That's so nice, I think my ego just doubled in size.
plink - I'm sorry about there not being much Darshe/Kall, but I'm going to do my best for there to be more in the nest chapter. And there will be a lot more reality blending too.
Chibi Vicious - I hope you haven't died. That was one long wait. I'm sowwy! *Tries to look cute so she isn't lynched*
Elizabeth Whittaker - Tell me when you write it, I will definitely want to read it. If you need a bouncing board, feel free to use me. Why does that sound so wrong? -_-'
Asuka Kureru - The dreams aren't as simple as they seem, and hopefully they're not what everyone is thinking they are, that's all I'm saying about them. I sometimes feel bad for Kall Su, making him so insecure, but I just can't help it. As for the confession, nothing major, just that Lucié sucks at history, sorry, no declarations of undying love.
P1 - I'm glad you like it, and look! It's updated!! Of course if you're reading this you already know that it's updated..
icediamond - I'll try to bring Kall's family into the next chapter. I'm trying to keep the characters somewhat similar to the manga, and in the manga Kall was heavily influenced by his family, which though it may not show yet, he is in this as well, but he didn't exactly have the best family in the manga either.
Tara Smith - I think the reason you can identify with Kall Su is because he's based on a real person, though he is slowly moving away from that person, there are a lot of aspects about him that are taken from a real person, including his love for history. And yes, Kall is gay. Or at the very least he's bi; either way, he's obsessed with Darshe, his exact sexual orientation will be discussed later, for the moment, just know that he digs guys, specifically he wants to bonk Lucié, and he may dig girls, he's never mentioned them before, but that doesn't rule them out.
Chibi Dark Schneider - I'd be afraid for my life if you hadn't added 'Liv long and prosper! ^_^*' at the end. The story is updated as you can see, and as for being finished, that's not going to happen for a long time yet, though I'll hopefully update more often.