Frodo grew more solemn the closer they came to Bag End. By the time
he and Clover left the woods and entered Hobbiton proper, he was positively
grim. Clover glanced over at her cousin. He was sweating, biting his lip
and swallowing periodically. She desperately wanted to say something,
anything, to comfort poor Frodo, but she couldn't for the life of her think
of a thing. If Frodo hadn't been so wrapped up in his worry for Bilbo,
he'd realize how uncharacteristically quiet his cousin was. As it stood,
he had other things on his mind.
Just around the corner from Bag End, Frodo suddenly stopped. For the second time in one walk, Clover continued on without him for several steps before realizing he'd halted. She stopped and turned toward him.
The sight that greeted her eyes would haunt her for a long time after. Only the horrors she saw during her own adventures, many years later, would compete with the way Frodo looked just then. He was shaking and pale. He kept clenching and unclenching his fists, shuddering each time. The expression in his eyes was one of pure terror, as tears ran freely down his cheeks. "Clover…" he breathed. "I can't…"
Clover rushed to her cousin. She took both his hands in hers and looked him in the eyes. It occurred to her then just how very blue they were. Funny how she'd never noticed that before. However, Frodo's eyes weren't the business at hand. The pain in them was.
"Frodo, you can do this. You have to," she said steadily.
Frodo shook his head. "I can't. I just can't. What if Bilbo's…..what if he's…..?" He dropped his gaze and sobbed, unable to finish his words.
Clover gathered Frodo into her arms for a comforting hug. She let him sob for just a little while, then took him by the shoulders and gave him a small shake. When he looked up at her, she said "Listen to me, Frodo Baggins. You CAN to this, I know it. You are far stronger than you think you are, my friend. Bilbo needs that strength now. He needs to see you, know that you're there, and that you need him. Many times, the will to get better makes all the difference in a recovery. It would not surprise me at all to see Bilbo beat this thing all the faster because he's needed."
Frodo nodded. He gulped, and visibly got himself under control. Clover wiped his tears away and smiled. "Buck up, my friend. It'll be all right," she said with a cheerfulness she did not feel.
"That's twice you've said that. You've never called me that before," Frodo commented.
Clover was perplexed. "Called you what?" she asked.
"My friend. You've never called me 'my friend' before," Frodo explained. He was desperately hanging onto anything he could to keep his fear for Bilbo at bay. He focused on the unusual behavior of his most irritating cousin (well, second most irritating. Lotho Sackville-Baggins was still the worst). Any port in a storm….
Clover thought about her words, and realized he was quite right. She blushed furiously, and scowled at Frodo. "Yes, well, don't get used to it! It's only because….because….because Bilbo's so sick and you're taking it so badly," she blurted out at last. She most certainly WAS NOT about to admit it had more to do with a certain pair of eyes, or the shy smile he gave as she reassured him, or the way it felt to hug him. She would not admit that even to herself. Frodo Baggins was still the Annoying One, as far as Clover was concerned. Or so she insisted in her thoughts.
Frodo sighed. Now THAT was more like the cousin he knew, brash and insensitive. Still, it brought his focus back to the matter at hand. "Let's get to Bag End. I need to see Bilbo," he said quietly.
"First intelligent thing you've said since I found you!" Clover snarled. She knew she'd been overly harsh with Frodo, and it bothered her. That it bothered her, confused her, and she did not like being confused. Especially by Frodo Baggins, of all hobbits!! So she did what she always did; she covered up her feelings by being bossy and defensive. That, too, was the Proudfoot in her.
Frodo said nothing. He just walked resolutely toward Bag End, and whatever horrible sight awaited him in Bilbo's room. Clover followed, angry with herself, with Bilbo's illness, with Frodo and with the world in general. She wanted only to deliver her cousin to her mother, then go find some private place to figure out these strange new thoughts. It occurred to neither hobbit that all of this might simply be part of growing up.
Just around the corner from Bag End, Frodo suddenly stopped. For the second time in one walk, Clover continued on without him for several steps before realizing he'd halted. She stopped and turned toward him.
The sight that greeted her eyes would haunt her for a long time after. Only the horrors she saw during her own adventures, many years later, would compete with the way Frodo looked just then. He was shaking and pale. He kept clenching and unclenching his fists, shuddering each time. The expression in his eyes was one of pure terror, as tears ran freely down his cheeks. "Clover…" he breathed. "I can't…"
Clover rushed to her cousin. She took both his hands in hers and looked him in the eyes. It occurred to her then just how very blue they were. Funny how she'd never noticed that before. However, Frodo's eyes weren't the business at hand. The pain in them was.
"Frodo, you can do this. You have to," she said steadily.
Frodo shook his head. "I can't. I just can't. What if Bilbo's…..what if he's…..?" He dropped his gaze and sobbed, unable to finish his words.
Clover gathered Frodo into her arms for a comforting hug. She let him sob for just a little while, then took him by the shoulders and gave him a small shake. When he looked up at her, she said "Listen to me, Frodo Baggins. You CAN to this, I know it. You are far stronger than you think you are, my friend. Bilbo needs that strength now. He needs to see you, know that you're there, and that you need him. Many times, the will to get better makes all the difference in a recovery. It would not surprise me at all to see Bilbo beat this thing all the faster because he's needed."
Frodo nodded. He gulped, and visibly got himself under control. Clover wiped his tears away and smiled. "Buck up, my friend. It'll be all right," she said with a cheerfulness she did not feel.
"That's twice you've said that. You've never called me that before," Frodo commented.
Clover was perplexed. "Called you what?" she asked.
"My friend. You've never called me 'my friend' before," Frodo explained. He was desperately hanging onto anything he could to keep his fear for Bilbo at bay. He focused on the unusual behavior of his most irritating cousin (well, second most irritating. Lotho Sackville-Baggins was still the worst). Any port in a storm….
Clover thought about her words, and realized he was quite right. She blushed furiously, and scowled at Frodo. "Yes, well, don't get used to it! It's only because….because….because Bilbo's so sick and you're taking it so badly," she blurted out at last. She most certainly WAS NOT about to admit it had more to do with a certain pair of eyes, or the shy smile he gave as she reassured him, or the way it felt to hug him. She would not admit that even to herself. Frodo Baggins was still the Annoying One, as far as Clover was concerned. Or so she insisted in her thoughts.
Frodo sighed. Now THAT was more like the cousin he knew, brash and insensitive. Still, it brought his focus back to the matter at hand. "Let's get to Bag End. I need to see Bilbo," he said quietly.
"First intelligent thing you've said since I found you!" Clover snarled. She knew she'd been overly harsh with Frodo, and it bothered her. That it bothered her, confused her, and she did not like being confused. Especially by Frodo Baggins, of all hobbits!! So she did what she always did; she covered up her feelings by being bossy and defensive. That, too, was the Proudfoot in her.
Frodo said nothing. He just walked resolutely toward Bag End, and whatever horrible sight awaited him in Bilbo's room. Clover followed, angry with herself, with Bilbo's illness, with Frodo and with the world in general. She wanted only to deliver her cousin to her mother, then go find some private place to figure out these strange new thoughts. It occurred to neither hobbit that all of this might simply be part of growing up.