F.R.I.E.N.D.S.
The one with another Friend
Intoduction: If you review tell me if you think the title should be F.R.I.E.N.D.S. or just Friends. Just something I would like to change.
Setting: The hospital. Ross and Rachel are there.
Ross: Where is everyone. Carol isn't even here yet.
Chandler and Monica walk in.
Ross: Where have you been. Its been an hour and twenty minutes since I called you.
Chandler: What about the time difference.
Ross: From here to the airport.
Chandler: Strange isn't it.
Rachel: So you guys did it.
Monica: You have no proof.
Ross: Oh my god. I can't believe you guys. You had sex right before you came here.
Chandler: But whats important here is we used Protection.
(Opening Theme.)
Setting: Continued from before. But Monica and Chandler are now sitting.
Monica: So where's Carol.
Ross: I don't know she should be here soon.
Chandler: And you blamed us for being late. The elizbien isn't even here yet.
Ross: Are you trying to make me cry.
Rachel: Chandler. Back off.
Chandler: What.
Rachel: You were just about to say something sarcastic.
Chandler: What proof do you have of that.
Rachel: Your Verbal record. Or how about the time you and Joey had a bet that you couldn't say anything sarcastic for a week. You didn't even last three days.
Chandler: So it was only a stupid bet.
Monica: A stupid bet that you lost.
Chandler: Oh shut up.
Phoebe and Joey enter.
Phoebe: Has the baby been born yet.
Ross: No Carol isn't even here yet.
Monica: Where were you.
Joey: Oh we just keeped on looking at our wonderful new apartment.
Chandler: Rub it in why don't ya.
Joey: I am rubbing it in.
Ross: When is Carol going to get here.
Phoebe: Chill Ross. Chill. You aura is getting very dirty.
Carol and Susan enter.
Ross: What took you guys so long.
Susan: The cab driver kept asking us for a threesome.
Chandler: That guy is crazy.
Carol: No it was a women.
Rachel and Ross follow Carol and Susan into the labour room.
Phoebe: I'm Hungry.
Joey: So am I. Lets go to the hospital Cafataria.
Joey and Phoebe walk of. A Doctor with two baby comes out of the delivery room.
Monica: Its no fair. I don't get a baby.
Chandler: You can have a baby if you want to have a baby.
Monica: You mean you'll do it.
Chandler: Sure. I've always dreamed of Chandler Jr.
Monica: Its not going to be Chandler Jr.
Chandler: I know.
Setting: Cafataria. Phoebe and Joey are in a long line up.
Joey: I'm starving.
Phoebe: I am too.
Joey: I mean. I bet all these people aren't even here for themselves. I'd say there here for there the sick people.
Phoebe: Yeah Really. I wonder of they have Lasnaga.
Joey: Its a Hospital cafataria.
Phoebe: Thats why I said. " I wonder. "
Joey: Oh.
A teenage Girl comes running up to Joey.
Girl: Oh my god its Joey Tribbiani.
Joey: And oh my god. Its a screaming girl.
Girl: Oh my god. I thought it was just the writers that made you funny. Your just naturally funny. Your so hot.
Phoebe: Back off.
Girl: Who the hell are you.
Phoebe: You worst nightmare.
The Girl runs off.
Joey: Calm down Pheebs.
Phoebe: Oh so you like her.
Joey: She's like 12.
Phoebe: Oh so if she was a bit older you would like her.
Joey: No. Pheebs . You know your the only girl for me.
Phoebe: Thanks. I actually didn't know that.
Setting: In the labour room. A doctor , Rachel , Ross , Carol and Susan are there.
Doctor: Your at 3 centimetres.
Carol: Oh wait I'm having a contraction. That doesn't really hurrrrttttt. Owwwwww.
Carol looks down.
Carol: Oh. I thought that was it.
Rachel: We all wish that.
Ross: Carol. Have you decided on a name for the baby.
Carol: No we haven't.
Susan: I think it should be Ken Willack - Bunch.
Ross: What about me. I'm in there too.
Susan: No. Your just Bobo the sperm guy.
Ross: Is that all you think of me as.
Susan: Yeah. Whats wrong with that.
Ross: I outta.
Rachel: Come down honey. I don't think of you as Bobo the sperm guy.
Susan: THats only because Ross brain washed you.
Carol: ( Yelling.) Thats it. Out Susan and Ross.
Ross: You giving us a time out.
Carol: Yes.
Ross: Just checking.
Ross and Susan leave. Rachel sits next to Carol on the bed.
Carol: When will they ever get along.
Rachel: I'm guessing the next time Hitler tries to take over the world.
Carol: Why can't they just get along. I mean. They both hate each other so much.
Rachel: Carol. Here's a word of advice. Separate them.
Carol: Thats two words.
Setting: In a hallway. Monica and Chandler are standing up.
Chandler: So. Where are we going to do it.
Monica: (Pointing to a Janitor closet.) In there.
Chandler: I'm not doing it .... In well a closet.
Monica: Fine. So we go home and do it and miss the birth of my nephew.
Chandler: Fine. I'll do it in there
Setting: Joey and Phoebe just finish lunch and walk past the Janitor closet and stop.
Phoebe: I think I can hear someone doing it.
Joey: In a hospital. What kind of Psycho would do that.
Phoebe: I think the sound is coming from the closet over there.
Joey: I hate this. Its like a horror movie. We'll open the door and some kind of sick bastard and a bitch will pop out.
Phoebe: That suspence is killing me. I'm opening that door.
Phoebe goes to open the door.
Joey: ( In slow motion. ) NNNNoooooooooooooo.
Phoebe opens it up. Joey and Phoebe see Chandler and Monica.
Phoebe: Well there's your bitch and bastard.
Setting: Another hallway. Ross and Susan are there.
Susan: We have to decide on something.
Ross: At least put Gellar in the name and I'll be sasticfied.
Susan: Find Something Gellar - Willick - Bunch.
Ross: But what will that something be.
Susan: Gerard.
Ross: Sounds like a old bald man.
Susan: Jimmy.
Ross: Sounds like a bodyguard.
Susan: How about James.
Ross: I don't want my son growing up becoming a Butler.
Susan: You so fussy.
All of a sudden three strechers come zooming down the hall.
Ross: Ahhhhhhhhhhh .
A old Janitor comes and pushes them out of the way. The strechers hit him and he falls to the ground and hits his. He is dead.
Ross: Is he dead.
Susan: I'm not sure. Whats his name.
She looks at his name tag.
Susan: Ben. What a nice name.
Ross: I think this is gods way of telling us what to call the baby.
Susan: Yeah.
Setting: In the hallway next to the Janitor closet. Monica and Chandler are dressed again. Phoebe and Joey are still flabergasted.
Monica: You had no buisness looking at us.
Joey: You had no buisness doing it in a Janitors closet.
Phoebe: Yeah. Whats wrong with you. You couldn't wait. At least for our safety you could have the locked the friken door.
Chandler: Sorry . Phoebe.
Phoebe: You better be. Joey thought you two were a murderous bitch and bastard.
Joey: I still think they are.
Joey crosses his arms.
Joey: Still. What were you two thinking. No one's ever going to open it?
Chandler: We weren't thinking.
Monica: All I wanted two do is have a baby.
Joey: you mean in there you two were trying to make a baby.
Phoebe: How cute.
Monica: well. I gues we can't know. Thanks to you two.
Setting: The labour room. Rachel and Carol and a doctor are there. Susan and Ross still enter.
Carol: Have you guys made up yet.
Susan: kinda.
Ross: We came up with a name for the baby.
Carol: You two actually agreed on something.
Ross: Yeah. We think it should be Ben Gellar - Willick - Bunch.
Carol: Ben. What a nice name.
Doctor: Its time. Your at 10 cm.
Carol: Okay.
(Closing Credits.)
Setting: The baby was born. Its in the nursery and Rachel , Ross , Monica , Phoebe and Joey are staring at the baby sleep.
Monica: Oh its so cute.
Chandler: It has a name.
Ross: Yeah Monica.
Monica: I know.
Phoebe: I want one of those.
Monica: So do I Pheebs. So do I.
Joey: Man. I'm not ready for a child yet.
Phoebe kisses Joey.
Phoebe: Are you ready now.
Joey: Joey the third here I come.
End.
The one with another Friend
Intoduction: If you review tell me if you think the title should be F.R.I.E.N.D.S. or just Friends. Just something I would like to change.
Setting: The hospital. Ross and Rachel are there.
Ross: Where is everyone. Carol isn't even here yet.
Chandler and Monica walk in.
Ross: Where have you been. Its been an hour and twenty minutes since I called you.
Chandler: What about the time difference.
Ross: From here to the airport.
Chandler: Strange isn't it.
Rachel: So you guys did it.
Monica: You have no proof.
Ross: Oh my god. I can't believe you guys. You had sex right before you came here.
Chandler: But whats important here is we used Protection.
(Opening Theme.)
Setting: Continued from before. But Monica and Chandler are now sitting.
Monica: So where's Carol.
Ross: I don't know she should be here soon.
Chandler: And you blamed us for being late. The elizbien isn't even here yet.
Ross: Are you trying to make me cry.
Rachel: Chandler. Back off.
Chandler: What.
Rachel: You were just about to say something sarcastic.
Chandler: What proof do you have of that.
Rachel: Your Verbal record. Or how about the time you and Joey had a bet that you couldn't say anything sarcastic for a week. You didn't even last three days.
Chandler: So it was only a stupid bet.
Monica: A stupid bet that you lost.
Chandler: Oh shut up.
Phoebe and Joey enter.
Phoebe: Has the baby been born yet.
Ross: No Carol isn't even here yet.
Monica: Where were you.
Joey: Oh we just keeped on looking at our wonderful new apartment.
Chandler: Rub it in why don't ya.
Joey: I am rubbing it in.
Ross: When is Carol going to get here.
Phoebe: Chill Ross. Chill. You aura is getting very dirty.
Carol and Susan enter.
Ross: What took you guys so long.
Susan: The cab driver kept asking us for a threesome.
Chandler: That guy is crazy.
Carol: No it was a women.
Rachel and Ross follow Carol and Susan into the labour room.
Phoebe: I'm Hungry.
Joey: So am I. Lets go to the hospital Cafataria.
Joey and Phoebe walk of. A Doctor with two baby comes out of the delivery room.
Monica: Its no fair. I don't get a baby.
Chandler: You can have a baby if you want to have a baby.
Monica: You mean you'll do it.
Chandler: Sure. I've always dreamed of Chandler Jr.
Monica: Its not going to be Chandler Jr.
Chandler: I know.
Setting: Cafataria. Phoebe and Joey are in a long line up.
Joey: I'm starving.
Phoebe: I am too.
Joey: I mean. I bet all these people aren't even here for themselves. I'd say there here for there the sick people.
Phoebe: Yeah Really. I wonder of they have Lasnaga.
Joey: Its a Hospital cafataria.
Phoebe: Thats why I said. " I wonder. "
Joey: Oh.
A teenage Girl comes running up to Joey.
Girl: Oh my god its Joey Tribbiani.
Joey: And oh my god. Its a screaming girl.
Girl: Oh my god. I thought it was just the writers that made you funny. Your just naturally funny. Your so hot.
Phoebe: Back off.
Girl: Who the hell are you.
Phoebe: You worst nightmare.
The Girl runs off.
Joey: Calm down Pheebs.
Phoebe: Oh so you like her.
Joey: She's like 12.
Phoebe: Oh so if she was a bit older you would like her.
Joey: No. Pheebs . You know your the only girl for me.
Phoebe: Thanks. I actually didn't know that.
Setting: In the labour room. A doctor , Rachel , Ross , Carol and Susan are there.
Doctor: Your at 3 centimetres.
Carol: Oh wait I'm having a contraction. That doesn't really hurrrrttttt. Owwwwww.
Carol looks down.
Carol: Oh. I thought that was it.
Rachel: We all wish that.
Ross: Carol. Have you decided on a name for the baby.
Carol: No we haven't.
Susan: I think it should be Ken Willack - Bunch.
Ross: What about me. I'm in there too.
Susan: No. Your just Bobo the sperm guy.
Ross: Is that all you think of me as.
Susan: Yeah. Whats wrong with that.
Ross: I outta.
Rachel: Come down honey. I don't think of you as Bobo the sperm guy.
Susan: THats only because Ross brain washed you.
Carol: ( Yelling.) Thats it. Out Susan and Ross.
Ross: You giving us a time out.
Carol: Yes.
Ross: Just checking.
Ross and Susan leave. Rachel sits next to Carol on the bed.
Carol: When will they ever get along.
Rachel: I'm guessing the next time Hitler tries to take over the world.
Carol: Why can't they just get along. I mean. They both hate each other so much.
Rachel: Carol. Here's a word of advice. Separate them.
Carol: Thats two words.
Setting: In a hallway. Monica and Chandler are standing up.
Chandler: So. Where are we going to do it.
Monica: (Pointing to a Janitor closet.) In there.
Chandler: I'm not doing it .... In well a closet.
Monica: Fine. So we go home and do it and miss the birth of my nephew.
Chandler: Fine. I'll do it in there
Setting: Joey and Phoebe just finish lunch and walk past the Janitor closet and stop.
Phoebe: I think I can hear someone doing it.
Joey: In a hospital. What kind of Psycho would do that.
Phoebe: I think the sound is coming from the closet over there.
Joey: I hate this. Its like a horror movie. We'll open the door and some kind of sick bastard and a bitch will pop out.
Phoebe: That suspence is killing me. I'm opening that door.
Phoebe goes to open the door.
Joey: ( In slow motion. ) NNNNoooooooooooooo.
Phoebe opens it up. Joey and Phoebe see Chandler and Monica.
Phoebe: Well there's your bitch and bastard.
Setting: Another hallway. Ross and Susan are there.
Susan: We have to decide on something.
Ross: At least put Gellar in the name and I'll be sasticfied.
Susan: Find Something Gellar - Willick - Bunch.
Ross: But what will that something be.
Susan: Gerard.
Ross: Sounds like a old bald man.
Susan: Jimmy.
Ross: Sounds like a bodyguard.
Susan: How about James.
Ross: I don't want my son growing up becoming a Butler.
Susan: You so fussy.
All of a sudden three strechers come zooming down the hall.
Ross: Ahhhhhhhhhhh .
A old Janitor comes and pushes them out of the way. The strechers hit him and he falls to the ground and hits his. He is dead.
Ross: Is he dead.
Susan: I'm not sure. Whats his name.
She looks at his name tag.
Susan: Ben. What a nice name.
Ross: I think this is gods way of telling us what to call the baby.
Susan: Yeah.
Setting: In the hallway next to the Janitor closet. Monica and Chandler are dressed again. Phoebe and Joey are still flabergasted.
Monica: You had no buisness looking at us.
Joey: You had no buisness doing it in a Janitors closet.
Phoebe: Yeah. Whats wrong with you. You couldn't wait. At least for our safety you could have the locked the friken door.
Chandler: Sorry . Phoebe.
Phoebe: You better be. Joey thought you two were a murderous bitch and bastard.
Joey: I still think they are.
Joey crosses his arms.
Joey: Still. What were you two thinking. No one's ever going to open it?
Chandler: We weren't thinking.
Monica: All I wanted two do is have a baby.
Joey: you mean in there you two were trying to make a baby.
Phoebe: How cute.
Monica: well. I gues we can't know. Thanks to you two.
Setting: The labour room. Rachel and Carol and a doctor are there. Susan and Ross still enter.
Carol: Have you guys made up yet.
Susan: kinda.
Ross: We came up with a name for the baby.
Carol: You two actually agreed on something.
Ross: Yeah. We think it should be Ben Gellar - Willick - Bunch.
Carol: Ben. What a nice name.
Doctor: Its time. Your at 10 cm.
Carol: Okay.
(Closing Credits.)
Setting: The baby was born. Its in the nursery and Rachel , Ross , Monica , Phoebe and Joey are staring at the baby sleep.
Monica: Oh its so cute.
Chandler: It has a name.
Ross: Yeah Monica.
Monica: I know.
Phoebe: I want one of those.
Monica: So do I Pheebs. So do I.
Joey: Man. I'm not ready for a child yet.
Phoebe kisses Joey.
Phoebe: Are you ready now.
Joey: Joey the third here I come.
End.