Right, so this was originally written as a release for my sadness regarding my friend's move to another state. It was really hard on us all, and I really miss him. So after I wrote it, I edited it to fit into a fic. I hope you like it.
I can't put into words what I feel at the moment. I am not positive if it could be classified as love, or even lust. I just know that without you here, I am miserable. My heart aches and I can't begin to think straight. There isn't a single person to talk to, and I wouldn't have the nerve to tell you to your face. I miss you so much, not seeing your face and not hearing your voice. It tears me up inside, my mind wanders when I try to concentrate. My thoughts always find there way to you, no matter what, it is always you. An innocent bystander would conclude I am in love, but I can't say for sure. I haven't had the chance to be with you long enough in order to deduce that it is indeed love. So soon, you were gone, before I was allowed to fall in love with you.
No. That's not true, I fell in love, the moment I set eyes upon you. It was loving you openly, waking up to your face every morning and embracing you every night that I wasn't allowed to do. Now I sit here with my pain, my regrets. If you were here you would say I am feeling sorry for myself and then flash me one of your loving smiles that could brighten the darkest room. Without you, I don't know what to do. I am lost, no direction in my life. I need you to tell me everything is going to be alright. I need your comfort and I need you. Every sad, heart wrenching love song I hear on the radio almost brings me to tears. Not that I haven't cried enough already, I honestly don't think I have tears left in my swollen eyes.
The more I think about it, every day, the more it seems like a nightmare. I foolishly keep expecting to wake up and discover you next to me. Then you would laugh and say, it was only a dream. But it's not. It is reality, my hell on earth. I wouldn't hesitate to tell you how I feel, now, if you were here. But, I lost my chance, it is over. I can't sleep, I sit in my room and wait for the sun to go down and come up, to go down and come up. Surely, it gets repetitive; but without you, nothing matters. I wait. Waiting for death I suppose, I don't see why I should go on. So I sink to the floor once again, empty and with nothing.
"I love you." I whisper into the darkness.
I can't put into words what I feel at the moment. I am not positive if it could be classified as love, or even lust. I just know that without you here, I am miserable. My heart aches and I can't begin to think straight. There isn't a single person to talk to, and I wouldn't have the nerve to tell you to your face. I miss you so much, not seeing your face and not hearing your voice. It tears me up inside, my mind wanders when I try to concentrate. My thoughts always find there way to you, no matter what, it is always you. An innocent bystander would conclude I am in love, but I can't say for sure. I haven't had the chance to be with you long enough in order to deduce that it is indeed love. So soon, you were gone, before I was allowed to fall in love with you.
No. That's not true, I fell in love, the moment I set eyes upon you. It was loving you openly, waking up to your face every morning and embracing you every night that I wasn't allowed to do. Now I sit here with my pain, my regrets. If you were here you would say I am feeling sorry for myself and then flash me one of your loving smiles that could brighten the darkest room. Without you, I don't know what to do. I am lost, no direction in my life. I need you to tell me everything is going to be alright. I need your comfort and I need you. Every sad, heart wrenching love song I hear on the radio almost brings me to tears. Not that I haven't cried enough already, I honestly don't think I have tears left in my swollen eyes.
The more I think about it, every day, the more it seems like a nightmare. I foolishly keep expecting to wake up and discover you next to me. Then you would laugh and say, it was only a dream. But it's not. It is reality, my hell on earth. I wouldn't hesitate to tell you how I feel, now, if you were here. But, I lost my chance, it is over. I can't sleep, I sit in my room and wait for the sun to go down and come up, to go down and come up. Surely, it gets repetitive; but without you, nothing matters. I wait. Waiting for death I suppose, I don't see why I should go on. So I sink to the floor once again, empty and with nothing.
"I love you." I whisper into the darkness.