But still the flakes in bullet flight
More pointedly than ever smite.
What would they more than have me blink?
What is it? What am I to think-
That hard and dry to hard and dry
They may have said for years?
Am I, are they, or both to melt?
If I supply the sorrow felt,
will they supply the tears?
Robert Frost-"The Offer"
Dilandau sat in his chair for a few moments more, but then, dreading what may happen if he fell back into sleep, he stretched his legs and let them fall, touching his feet to the damp floor. He reflected on the dream… that dream… He knew it couldn't only be that. The very idea of this trial was enough to turn his stomach into ice… and he hated ice. He stood, and paced about his floor, not thinking about where he was walking. What had the doppelganger meant?
Dilandau let Zongi's final words run though his mind once more, "Perhaps we're talking about two different trials… Two different judges." What in the world could that mean? Dilandau thought he may have an inkling, but there was no way of knowing for sure. Anyway, he still had to think about his plea.
Of course he had to plead. Dilandau had known too many of his dreams in his life to not take this one seriously. Nearly every dream he could remember having was a memory for him, and this was most definitely not. He knew, with every fiber of his being, that he would be in that courtroom the moment he fell asleep.
He was broken from his reverie by a voice, "Dilandau?" said his mother, her voice concerned.
Dilandau's feet had carried him into the kitchen without him knowing it. He smiled nervously, "Oops."
"I'd said your name a couple of times before… Are you all right?" she asked, coming forward to feel his forehead.
He pushed her hand away gently, "I'm fine." he muttered.
She considered his face for a moment, "You don't look fine, in fact you look like you didn't get a wink of sleep last night…" she said thoughtfully.
"I do?" he said, shuffling over to the polished brass mirror on the wall. Through its distorted surface he saw dark circles under his eyes, and a dull cast to his skin. He turned towards his mother, "I didn't get a great night's sleep last night.." he said.
"Oh." she said, and looked twice as worried, "Why not?"
He shrugged with a wry smile, "What else… Dreams." he said. He waved at his mother, and walked for the door, "I'm gonna go eat at Ravi's."
Celena nodded, but her eyes were clouded with worry. He hadn't had dreams that bothered him that much in some time. She turned away as he ran out the door. He would tell her about them soon, of course. If she didn't find out for herself first, by experiencing them herself.
Dilandau smelled the fresh, mid-morning air. He loved getting up on cool, moist days like this. For a moment he wanted to go up to the hill and whistle these lingering fears away, but he was hungry, so he stayed the impulse.
Ravi's house wasn't so far away from Dilandau's. Their houses were separated by a small stand of trees, and they'd been wearing a path through the woods for years. It was fairly wide by now. Dilandau kicked some dust up from the path, and recalled racing back and forth through the trees, trying to wear it down.
He shuffled up to Ravi's door, and knocked on it.
Ravi's mother answered, looking up at him, "Hey, Dilandau." she said with a smile, "Let me guess, you want something to eat?"
Dilandau grinned, "Yeah, guess so."
"Dilandau's here!" Ravi called, running up behind his mother, "Come eat with me an' Lyon, before my mom gets ya."
"Come now!" Ravi's mother shouted, "I'm much too small to 'get' anyone…"
"Don't believe her.." Ravi said in a stage whisper, "I've never been afraid of getting killed, except when she's mad at me."
Ravi's mother gave him a quick elbow in the thigh, causing him to wince sharply, "As well you should." she said matter-of-factly.
Ravi looked at Dilandau, "See what I mean…" he mumbled painfully.
Dilandau chuckled, following the two of them into the kitchen.
"Ah!" said the boy seated at the table, a skinny young man with tanned skin and a mop of curly dishwater-blonde hair, "Dil's here!"
"Hey Lyon." Dilandau said, sitting down.
Lyon leaned back, putting his feet on the table, "You know, every time I see you, Dilandau, I wonder why you keep that ugly, old-fashioned haircut."
"Ha. Ha." Ravi said, "Lyon's gonna be a jerk today." he finished, jerking his thumb at the boy.
"He's gonna be real hungry, too, if he don't take his feet offa my table." Ravi's mother said, her voice hard.
Lyon's eyes widened, and he put his feet on the floor, "Sorry, ma'am." he said.
Dilandau chuckled, being with his friends had put him more at ease, "Oh, so you think that the curly mess you have on your head is better?"
"It's certainly cooler." Lyon sneered, overacting.
"At least I can brush my hair without losing the brush." Dilandau retorted.
Lyon laughed at that, "Oh…. You win, man.. You win today." He pointed a finger at Dilandau, "But tomorrow…. Tomorrow's for me." He jabbed the finger into his chest.
"You say that every day, Lee." Ravi said, relaxing.
Ravi's mom walked up with a plate of fruit and some pastries, "Eat this and shut up." she said with a beatific smile.
Lyon grinned, "Yes ma'am." he said, obediently putting a flaky pastry in his mouth.
The boys ate, and in the ensuing silence, Dilandau became more uncomfortable with his thoughts. The silence gave him a chance to reflect on the dream.
It had been his intention, when coming here, to immerse himself in the day-to-day things, and ignore the strange dream that he somehow knew was real. However, in this silence, it all came rushing back, and he reflected on what he would tell them that night.
This plea seemed to be important to them… So why were they making him make it? It was obvious, owing to the identities of the defense, the jury, and the prosecution, that they wanted him to plead guilty, but to what end? Maybe the really wanted him to plead not guilty, and show that he was defiant, or give them more of a chance to mess with his head.
Was it about what they wanted, though? Those dark figures in the cloaks… They must have been watching him, and trying to figure out a way to take him back. Perhaps they were still in Zaibach, and they wanted to bring the country back to power. But wasn't it supposed to be about what he wanted? They had given him this choice.
He couldn't help but think that this would all lead somehow back to them, back to where he started. Probably there was no right answer. Whether he plead guilty or not guilty, it meant nothing, because in the end it all came back to them. The thought made him sick.
"Dilandau?" came Ravi's mother's voice, concerned.
"Hm?" he said, looking at her.
"Are you all right? You look sick."
Ravi and Lyon stared at him for a moment, "You know.." Lyon said through mouthfuls of food, "She's right. You don't look too well."
"Hm." Dilandau said obliquely, and then, with a significant glance at Ravi, "I haven't been sleeping well lately."
Ravi stared back at him, his eyes worried.
Dilandau shook his head, "Well, anyhow. Thanks for having me." he said, rising.
"What?" Ravi's mother said, "Leaving already? You haven't even eaten anything.."
He smiled weakly, "I guess I'm just a wanderer today." he said, as if apologizing. He walked out into the hallway.
With a quick glance at his mother, Ravi rose from the table and followed Dilandau. He gave Dilandau a worried look, "Hey, man, are you all right?"
Dilandau looked at him sideways, and shrugged, "Dunno." he said frankly, "I'd rather not talk about it."
"Dreams, huh?" Ravi said, crossing his arms.
"Could be…" Dilandau said evasively.
"Well, whatever it is, you oughtta know…" Ravi said, looking up.
"Yeah?" Dilandau said, looking at Ravi.
Ravi put a hand on Dilandau's shoulder, "All that stuff… It's not your problem anymore."
Dilandau frowned, and twisted out of his grasp, "How do you know…?" he asked placidly, staring Ravi in the eyes.
Ravi blinked, "I…"
"It might still be." Dilandau said, but he was thinking. What did it matter? If the madoushi had made this dream, no matter what he did they would turn it against him. So, no matter what his plea was, it would be used against him. In that case, what did it matter what he said? He paused for a moment, mulling this over, and then looked up at the silent Ravi, "I'll tell you about it, if you don't find out for yourself."
"Dilandau, I…" Ravi started nervously.
"Don't worry." Dilandau said, "You helped, anyway." He walked out the door, and shut it.
Inside, Ravi shook his head, pressing his palm against the door.
Dilandau was back home in no time.
"Back." he said.
"Oh? So early?" Celena said, "Did you eat that fast?"
Dilandau shook his head, dropping into a chair, "I got distracted, so I left. I wasn't doing them much good there, thinking about something else instead of paying attention to them…" he sighed.
Celena sat down, staring him earnestly in the face, "So, are you going to tell me what's wrong?" she asked.
He turned away, "No. No… You'll find out." he stood, kissed her on the forehead, and left.
Minutes later, she heard the haunting grass whistle drifting through the trees.
Author's note: My mouth hurts!! I had my teeth (two) pulled last Thursday, when I posted chapter 3.. I didn't want to change my note, then.. But my mouth hurts now, (Saturday night) because my ibuprofen just wore off. Gah. But anyhow, a more light and airy chapter, slightly sweet, filling… about food. I haven't eaten anything all day. My mouth hurts too much.
Anyway, notice a change? I updated all the chapters with verses from Robert Frost! I love Robert Frost… So, I decided to use stuff from him in all my chapters. They don't all fit real well, but oh well. I likey it. I'll reupload the other chapters… someday.
The end of this chapter reminds me a lot of Naozumi from Kodomo no Omocha. 'Gee, I'm worried, depressed, and/or angry… Must go play music!' It's much more random in Kodocha, though. ^_^
So anyway! What do you think he'll plead? Well, I guess it doesn't really matter! (Or does it?) Muahaha! I hope to keep you in the dark about a lot of this stuff until really really close to the end, so don't be too smart and figure it all out, please!! If you do, email me, and I'll bow to your whims, for you must be just like me.
What's that you say? I got some Reviews??
Macky: I'm somewhat disappointed that you thought it was funny… Hmm… Oh well, just as long as you were entertained by it, it's all fine by me!
Etowato: Yay! Too bad I updated late… Ha ha… Heh.. Sorry, I was on vacation. So read this chapter and be in suspense for the next one.
Dilanda: Oops, another person to apologize for my lateness to… On vacation! Sorry!
Feye Morgan: Yay! Original! This's gotta be short, though, gotta go, almost out of school already!!