YAY!!! I finally got it done and it has been gruelling, what with the writers block I've had and all. Hee hee, I'm VERY happy about the amount of reviews I got for the last two chaps, even more than my long fic 'Two Strangers' at the same point (hint hint to go check it out? ;).) Anyway, MUST give thanks to all reviewers and will do so at the end of this chap. I dedicate this chap to my mum as the only one in my incredibly dull family to actually laugh at the idea, she also gave me the idea for Pippin's physical ailment…ye shall see.

Disclaimer: OWN NOTHING, nada, zip, nil, nix, zoint, the crumbs from my last meal so I you sue, crumbs is all you'll get. Hee hee.

Summery: Now, Pippin has lost his whole sense of identity. Add a wizard and a couple of paranoid hobbits, and you have a few problems. *grins*

Ok, here we go

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3: A Turn for Better and Worse

He mumbled and murmured and squirmed around, but no one was going to go over there and take him out of the sack, it was simply too dangerous for them, and for the hole.

"Are you sure he won't suffocate?" Diamond wiped the crumbs of the cake from her chin and peered over at the corner where they had popped the bagged Pippin. She looked sympathetic, and was confused when everyone else looked at her in horrified bemusement.

"You know what pity did last time, it's best if he stays there until we figure what to do." Frodo sighed and patted his stomach, leaning back into his chair and staring into the fire. The party had been pleasant enough, when they had finally stopped Pippin from trying to free every piece of food in the larder, and from trying to water EVERYTHING in the hole.

"Well, what ARE we to do?" Merry said after a moment's silence. "It is not like we can wave our hands and magically bring his memory back, that is more up Gandalf's line and even then I doubt it will work."

"Doubt what will work, young Brandybuck?"

"I doubt that…" Merry started rattling on again when he realized the voice had not belonged to any hobbit that was in that room at that moment and he turned, coming face to face with a belt. A belt tied round the grey robes of a very tall wizard who was now stooping to avoid the low beams.

"Um, Gandalf?"

"Yes Merry?"

"What are you doing here?"

"I came for Frodo's birthday, but I certainly was not expecting this…confusing arrangement. Why is our little Peregrin stuffed like a bunch of potatoes into a sack?" The wizard cocked his eyebrow and accepted a seat from the grinning host, Frodo pushing it up until it touched the back of Gandalf's knees and forced him to sit sharp.

"Umm…" Merry swivelled back around in his own chair and stared back at Pippin. The younger hobbit still hadn't stopped moving and he wondered where this ceaseless energy was coming from.

"He's cracked."  Estella said simply, her no nonsense tone bringing every other musing hobbit back to the here and now.

"He's lost it," she continued. "And now we have no idea what to do with him." She got up from her chair, stirred the embers of the fire and sat down again all huffy like. No one, except her, missed the look of quiet amusement Merry shot in her direction. Was he infatuated? By oath he was.

"Ok, now we have that established, may someone please enlighten me as to HOW this happened?" Gandalf lit the pipe that came out of nowhere, but when his smoke rings stayed normal and the hobbits realized they were not going to be entertained by magic until they told him, they each told him a bit, concerning their own views of the situation.

"I popped him in the sack…" Merry started.

"We saw them in the garden…" said Rose, going bright red at the memory.

"He spilt hot water on me…"

"He totally soaked poor Diamond…"

"He clogged my vent…"

"He ruined the garden…"

"He freed the food…"

"He freed the food…"

"He freed the food…"

"He freed…"

"Ok ok! I get the picture." Gandalf chuckled a little and sent a horse shaped smoke ring up to the ceiling, letting it gallop around for a while before it fled up the chimney. This pleased the hobbits immensely and Diamond clapped her hands together, watching with wide eyes as a rowboat came out and the little smoky figure inside it rowed around her head before joining the horse.

"Well," said Gandalf after a moment's silence. "I guess the only thing to do now is…talk to him. Try to jog that memory a bit."

"We have tried that. But it does no good, he's completely gone all fruity." Frodo sighed and walked over to the sack, prodding it lightly and sighing again as the same old dribble of words came out.

"Pippinfruit, come see me. If I can't see me because the light is gone does that mean I'm invisible? Oh goody, invisible fruit, walking talking invisible fruit come see pip watermelon oh goody. Sack is tight, ouch, sack is tight and no dirt, need dirt, water, air…ouch!"

"What in the world is he doing in there?" Merry leaned forward and tried to see individual movements in the sack but gave up, wincing every time a soft 'ouch' came from it.

"We have to check…later of course." Gandalf added, seeing the looks of disapproval from the hobbits that had spent far too much time with Pippin to not know what NOT to do.

"But, he's being hurt in there, maybe if..." Diamond clamped her mouth shut as Rose purposefully punched her in the arm, glaring hard to stop the rain of sympathy from overpowering better judgement. "But he can't breathe." She tried again, getting another glare from Rose before Frodo spoke up.

"I think she is right, he has spent rather a long time in that sack. If we keep a close eye on him I'm sure it will be ok...and don't worry Sam," Frodo added, seeing the look of worry from his friend, "I'm sure Bag End will be safe, Gandalf is here." He smiled at the wizard and a tension enveloped the room as Merry stood, making his way over to the sack.

"Pippin?" He whispered timidly. There was silence, but that actually was not a good thing, the movements had ceased as well. "Pip?" He tried again, prodding the sack lightly before jumping back in shock as a loud shout came from the bag.

"HEY! Stop it! What am I doing here? What's going on? HELLO!?" Everyone gasped, something was strange about this, and it was stranger than the strangeness that had been going on the last few hours. Strange.

Diamond put her small head in her arms, a headache forming from thinking too much.

"Let him out, Merry." Frodo, in all his Baggins wisdom gestured to the hobbit and Merry bit his lip as he knelt down next to the sack and untied it.

"It's about time!" A red faced Pippin scrambled half out and sat up, glaring heatedly at the others in the room until his eyes rested upon the wizard and his glare faltered, a little. "What's going on?" he growled as he scratched his head and winced, he had discovered something and so had the others.

"Oh Pippin!" Merry gasped, grabbing his cousin and checking his hair. "Why'd you go and do that?"

"Do what?" Pippin squinted at him and struggled completely out of the sack, losing his balance and falling in a heap on the ground, Merry dashing back to his side and hugging him tight.

"You're back you're back you're back you're ba…"

"MERRY!" Pippin was being strangled and he pushed his cousin off him, still touching his head tenderly and wondering why everyone was looking at him with mixed expressions of joy and apprehension, then he saw Diamond.

"Dimmy!" He got up and rushed at her, but then stopped and frowned, quite confused when she ran screaming out of the room and he was left to his own devices. "Huh?" he scratched his head again and this time let out a rather loud shout. "MY HAIR!!!"

"Oh Pippin…" Merry murmured as the hobbit ran out of the room, into the kitchen and straight into Sam who was coming out, a nice shiny saucepan in his hands.

"Mister Frodo, I…" Pippin didn't give him time to finish as he snatched the saucepan away and starting examining himself in it's reflection, checking the top of his head with woe.

"My hair, my hair…" He whimpered and all the others were in mixed emotional states. Rose was trying not to laugh, Estella was in better condition but her face was twitching from suppressing it, the Gaffer was doubled over and snorts of laughter were escaping his mouth, Frodo looked a cross between relieved and exasperated and Gandalf stayed stern and still with a small smile playing under his beard. Merry had left the room to find Diamond and all that left was Sam, who was absolutely oblivious to the changes that had occurred in the last few minutes and was thinking that Pippin had escaped and needed to be stopped again.

"For the Shire!" He yelled, coming up from behind the younger hobbit from the kitchen where he had crept after Pippin had pushed him aside.

"Sam! NO!" Frodo's call of warning was too late as the rather heavy frying pan came down onto Pippin's head, the poor hobbit swaying a little bit before dropping to the ground in a most undignified heap. Sam's grin of triumph was short lived as the others roared at him.

"What'd you do that for?" Yelled his father.

"He was getting normal!" Estella added.

"It was wearing off, he only wanted to check his hair!" Frodo joined in and Gandalf chuckled.

"Or lack thereof."

Rose didn't say a word, if anything she was looking with pity at Sam who was going red in face as he realized his mistake.

"Er…oops?" he stuttered, looking down at the unconscious figure at his feet.

"Yes…BIG oops!" Merry stood at the door with a rather large scowl on his face and Diamond peeping from behind, all wide eyed and innocent. "And I was thinking we could all have a nice normal day for once. Then you go and knock him out…AGAIN!" He tapped his foot angrily. Diamond just made her way to Pippin's side and knelt next to him, stroking his head and frowning at the bald patches.

"Why would he pull his hair out?" She queried, looking at the wizard as though he had all the answers.

"I would not know, little one. But from what I have heard, he may have thought…hrmph," he hid the chuckle behind a cough "…that he was…pruning?" The wizard's smile was unmistakeable now and the others relaxed a little, all looking at Pippin as though he would wake up any second. Which, by the luck they had been having the last few hours, he did.

"Ohh, owey. Pippin has a very sore head…why?" he blinked and looked up at Diamond, she smiled and gently poked his nose.

"Sam gave you a rather hard knock on the head with a pan." Her smile was genuine, until…

Pippin grinned. "Ohh! Pretty flower needs a bit more water."

TBC

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Ha ha, will continue soon enough…if writers block does not return *shivers in dread*. Here are the thankyous for the reviews and all.

Chap 1 Reviews: Noname:-Kudos for the review, is DEFINITELY meant to be silly. Pipsqueak:-Merry lose his memory? The possibilities are astounding, but maybe later :). Xun Err:-He did get it back, kinda…but we shall see. Thanx for reviewing. Eriks-lil-rocker:-I used your idea in the second chap, absolutely priceless, thanx heaps.

Chap 2 Reviews: Kori Lewis:-Thanx for the review, I'm not usually a "cute" person so this is weird for me :). Tesekian:-Is it really that funny? Wow, maybe I should do this more often. Ta mate. Xun Err:-Thanx again for reviewing, took your advice and waited and…well, here we are. Fool of a Took:-Here's your wish, you have more and ta for the positive look on the girls. ringspell:-Got your idea for this chap but I turned it around a bit, instead of Sam bringing it back, he's gone and done something a liiiiitle stupid. Lol.

Again, thanx for all reviews. The more I get the faster I write and the less I am able to get along with my father. Hee hee. Ta Ta