Title: "A Family that once was is no more" Chapter Three: Black and White confessions.
Part Three: Pan's Narrative
I stood by my dresser that night folding away some of Nikita's clothes. I was so completely caught up in my feelings I couldn't really feel the fever or how sick I really was.
At times it was difficult for me to stare into his eyes, after all that I've done, after all that he's done. I was so angry...but then so guilty, so hurt...but so in need of his pity, so weak I was ashamed of myself.
I now start to fully realize how we drifted apart. I was putting too much of my faith in one man, and even more of my problems. He had his own life, his own fears , his own problems and I was soon becoming one of them.
Now I wonder if I've been making the same mistake with Erasa. Because behind that gentle relaxed expression lives quiet suffering. Pain that overshadows mine...
Authors Narrative
She was born Sakura Erasa Cruz at 12:02 am one early Sunday morning.
She was a beautiful little blonde girl with brilliant black eyes. Eyes that seemed to beg for someone to call her their own. Sadly no one ever did...
The majority of her life was spent with her being passed from foster home to foster home.Erasa often wondered if something was wrong with her. She would be moved so much in such a short amount of time she would never really get the chance to finish unpacking her clothes.
At times she found herself sleeping in an office inside the foster agency. There were few families available and even fewer that considered to carry the emotional baggage such a young girl brought with her.
At Twelve Erasa was on the verge of being placed in a group home, something she had heard horrible things about from other foster children. Deciding it was time to live on her own comfort Erasa wandered away from that vicious emotional cycle and onto the streets.
They never really went looking for her, in their eyes it was just one less child they had to worry about.
For the first couple months Erasa slept on a mattress in the back room of a hardware store, after convincing the wife of the owner to give her a job cleaning and putting tools and supplies away, she didn't make much, just enough to eat a little something three times a day.
At times the owner's wife would buy Erasa clothes and other things she needed,Erasa seemed to grow fond of the woman but she never really became attached to Erasa. Something Erasa had been through enough of not to even care.
For the first time in her life Erasa felt as if some sort of normal existence was begining to come together for her. But as we all learn through life nothing is certain and at times life pushes us to move on.
Months later the couple sold the store and Erasa found herself homeless. That night tired and hungry she wandered into a nearby shelter, not the most pleasant looking of places but for now she knew she would have to call it home.
As she sat on the small worn bed huddled next to her belongings, she cried softly so no one would hear.
In her life she never craved expensive toys, a big house and fancy clothes. All she ever dreamed for was to be with someone who genuinely loved her, someone to tuck her in at night, someone to read to her, kiss her, hug her and most importantly say something no one has ever said to her..."Your mine and I love you."
As Erasa grew the thought of ever having a mother or a father became so distant to her. It was like trying to reach for the stars you would see on a clear night. They were there but so far from your reach you would eventually give up trying altogether.
The first time she told Pan all about this Pan felt almost guilty, here she was suffering because her family abandoned her and Erasa had never really had any type of family at all. Only people who had taken her into their care just so they could receive a check every month from Social Services. Money which Erasa told her, she had never really seen any of.
She considered Pan to be her only family the only person she trusted in life. The one who she cried too, confessed too, but never lied too, and in someways the mother ,the sister, the friend that she never had.
A person she loves and a person she know's that loves her back...
Goten's apartment West Satan City
Goten sat against the headboard of his bed staring across the room at a photo that hung on the wall.
"I still remember when that was taken..." He thought to himself laughing a bit.
The photo was of Pan smearing some of her birthday cake across Goten's face over something he had done earlier to her. You could see Chi Chi trying to stop her and Goku on the opposite end trying to snag himself a piece of cake during the confusion.
"So many memories, good memories..." He thought as his expression leveled out from content to displeased.
Goten dropped down flat on his bed and closed his eyes wanting to drift off to sleep but as soon as he did the phone rang.
Picking up the cordless he stared at the caller I.D. before answering it.
He sighed, it was not someone he really wanted to talk to right now, but he felt it was better to address the call then to have the phone ringing later on in the night.
"It's late Gohan..." Goten said answering the phone with that question.
"Late for who?" Gohan questioned.
"Me, I need to be at work early tomorrow.." Goten explained.
"Listen Goten the reason I called was because you haven't been over in awhile, not to my house not to Bulma's. I just wanted to make sure everything was alright." Goten explained with a note of concearn in his voice.
"Everythings the way it should be." Goten said in a unconvincing tone.
There was an awkward pause in the conversation.
"Listen...if this is about what was said about Paris I'm sorry, her name came up and a conversation started. I'm sorry I wish we could take it back ." Gohan apologized.
"Gohan what happened between me and Paris stays between me and Paris, it's not something I would like to be discussed openly, understood?" Goten expressed.
"I know Goten I'm sorry. listen, Thursday night around six were planning to have dinner at Bulma's. Everyone would really like it if you'd come." Gohan urged.
Goten was silent for a moment then spoke.
"Expect me a little late..." He said hanging up immediately after.
Earlier that night
West Satan city Memorial Hospital
"Sir, visiting hours are from 1:00 pm to 8:00 pm. I hope your aware the current time is 7:53pm." The Nurse alerted Goten.
" I'm a friend of the family to the patient in room 536. Her mother wanted to check on her tonight since she can't make it, she told me if I showed this card I could stay with her after normal hours." Goten said handing it to the nurse.
"Oh , your Son Goten aren't you? I remember now her mother did call earlier, I just need you to show me your drivers license and you can go up." The nurse explained.
"Here you go." Goten said handing it to her.
"Thank you, if you require anything you can always go down to the nearest Nurses station or push the call button in her room." The nurse stated to him handing back the drivers license.
"Thank you...have a nice night." Goten said making his way towards the elevators.
Stopping at the fifth floor he made his way towards room 536 once there he removed his coat folding it neatly over his arm.
Goten quietly entered the room.
He found her sleeping comfortably covered by warm quilts. The lights had been dimmed.
Gently he sat down next to her and gave her a soft kiss on the cheek.
She slowly opened her eyes and upon seeing him smiled a relieved smile.
"Hi.." She answered weakly.
"Hey beautiful...how you feeling?" Goten said stroking her hair gently.
"Tired..." She responded softly.
"Physical therapy session?" Goten asked.
"They butchered me..." She said smiling a bit.
"Did they say anything?" Goten asked.
"I've gotten better, but not nearly enough to leave this hospital." She explained with a reasonable sound of discontent in her voice.
Goten looked at her with such concearn.
" I get enough of that look from everybody else, I don't need it from the one person I can talk too. " Bura explained.
"Bura, I know after what's happened you can't be the same person anymore, but shutting people out and wrapping yourself in silence is only going to keep you here longer." Goten explained.
"I lay here day in and day out for the past four month's stuffing pain killers in my mouth to keep from feeling like my legs are burning Most of the day I'm totally alone, I have nothing but my thoughts to keep me company and they wonder why I'm less social?." She argued.
"Bura I need you to let us know what we have to do, none of us want you to be this way." Goten urged.
Bura turned her head away.
"I need too know what you want, if it something me or you mom can get you or do for you just name it." Goten said gently gliding the back of his hand against the side of her face.
"There's a lot of things most of which can only be dreams..." Bura answered.
"It doesn't hurt to let someone else in..." Goten explained..
"I loved her so much, after what I did I really didn't think it was right for me to love someone like that again." she started.
Goten listened.
"She came to me for help and all I could see was the mistakes she made." She admitted.
"Bura..." Goten said a bit weary.
"I know Goten no one's heard from her , but it's a dream I tend to have every now and then. Being able to look her in the eye and say forgive me." Bura expressed getting a bit defensive.
Goten covered his eyes and leaned his head on his arm not sure how to help Bura.
"I've done a lot in my life wrong even since then, things I did that complicated peoples lives." Bura explained.
Goten just listened.
"Do you think about her Goten?" Bura questioned.
"Sometimes..." He stated.
"She really had a lot of faith to do what she did you know?, she didn't come back crawling on her knees like Gohan said she would." Bura pointed out.
"We've missed out on so much, the birth, the kids first words, first steps , Pan turning 18 and then 20, I seriously would of loved to had been there for that." Bura expressed.
Bura eyes began to drift.
"Just relax, I no how you feel.." Goten said taking her hand gently.
"I always feel better when your around me." She smiled as her eyes began to close.
"I told you already, I'm here for whenever you need me I always have been." Goten stated.
"Stay with me... just until I'm out cold." Bura requested squeezing Goten's hand a bit as her eyes closed.
"Sure..." Goten said squeezing back gently.
Three days Later
East Satan City Harbor
Pan entered the office area somewhat nervously. She had always been up there to pick up her pay never to speak with her employer on a personal level.
"You wanted to see me Mr. Monroe?" Pan spoke to a man sitting at desk a few feet in front of her.
"Have a seat." he advised.
Pan had not been feeling well for the past three days since the incident at the park , errors and misjudgements in her work were noticeable.
"Pan I called you In here to talk to you about a few concerns I have involving your work recently." He bagan.
"Mr. Monroe' let me first say I haven't been feeling well and-- I know I've haven't met quota recently but-- I promise if I have too work another shift to make it up I--." Pan spoke in a apologetic panicky way.
"Pan please calm yourself, it's not what you think ok? settle down." He assured her.
Pan took a breath and relaxed herself.
"Pan I called you in because a few of your co workers have brought their concerns about your well being to my attention. I know it's none of my business and it's not my place but first let me assure you whatever we speak in this office is confidential no one else will know." He assured her.
"I know sir." Pan said seeming somewhat worried about what he was going to ask her.
"Pan is there any serious medical complications going on with you? I ask you this because honestly for a awhile now I've seen you sort of depressed, somewhat unfocused sometimes the energy you always show in your work dwindles and people around you are taking notice that your giving off the impression that something is wrong and I know part of this maybe do to the fact that you're a single mother and you have to take a lot of time to attend to your daughter." He Explained.
"I have certain things going on in my life right now, but nothing I'm bringing to work with me." Pan said staring down towards the floor.
"When was the last time you saw a doctor?" He asked removing his glasses.
"Honestly? it's been awhile." Pan admitted.
He stared at her for a moment watching her nervously avoid eye contact.
"Pan... I tell you what. I want you to take the rest of the day off...and the next two days. And during that time I want you to have your self checked out ok?"
"Sir I can't I can't afford to not have the pay from those days under my belt." Pan admitted.
He smiled. "Pan...I remember when you first walked into my office carrying that little girl of yours looking for some sort of work. I took a real risk hiring an 18 year old girl with no experience what so ever. And I'll admit because you were a young mother that did play on my heart strings a bit. But you know what? I'm not sorry I hired you, hell you work harder then most of the men in this harbor.
That's why I want to see you get better. And don't worry I know that's why your going recieve pay for those days." He expressed.
"I don't know what to say...I've always thought I was just getting by in my work." Pan said somewhat stunned.
"Right now Pan go home and get some sleep." He advised.
"I--um I don't how too thank you for this..." Pan admitted.
"There's no need, I'll see you Monday ok?." He explained as Pan rose from her seat.
"Thank you...for everything." Pan said before leaving his office.
"Nikita's going to be so happy, this way I can spend the rest of the day with her and I can take her to my appointment and then end the rest of the week at home." Pan thought to herself walking along the shoveled sidewalks.
The bus pulled to the stop at the end of the street.
"It's a blessing." Pan said walking towards the bus stop.
The bus was virtually empty except for one man sitting in the very back.
Pan sat in the middle and leaned her head back against the seat staring through the window as the bus pulled out of the stop.
As the bus rolled through the streets of East Satan city Pan could feel the eyes of the man sitting in back settling upon her. She decided to shake off the notion and closed her eyes to rest a bit.
She began to hear foot steps draw close to where she was sitting she began to worry. But it's when the man stood next to the empty beside her she really started to worry.
She turned her head slowly in his direction. Her eyes widened she couldn't believe who it was next to her.
"...Vegeta." Pan said staring at him.
"I'm surprised you still remember. It's been awhile." He replied.
There was a pause in the conversation neither knew how to continue.
"Can I sit?." Vegeta asked.
"Y-Yeah sure." Pan said moving her bag from the empty seat.
"Forgive me I'm not very good at this sort of thing." Vegeta admitted.
"It's alright, I'm not any better." She admitted.
"So, are you doing ok?" Vegeta questioned.
"It's been-- I'm holding my own." Pan expressed.
Vegeta just nodded a bit.
Vegeta stared at Pan trying to read her current situation.
"It's none of my buisness and you don't really have to answer this, but I wanted to know--"
"It was a girl--Nikita--she's doing good." Pan said realizing what he was going to ask.
"You don't happen to have a picture of her on you do you?" Vegeta asked.
"Yeah give me a sec." Pan said opening her purse and pulling out a small wallet size photo of Nikita then handing it to Vegeta.
"She takes after you in the eyes..." Vegeta said smiling a bit handing the photo back to Pan.
"You could keep it if you'd like but--." Pan explained.
"Don't worry it'll stay with me only." Vegeta said assuring Pan placing the photo in the inner pocket of his brown leather jacket near his chest.
The bus pulled into a stop.
"This is me..." Vegeta said getting up.
"Vegeta..." Pan called softly.
Vegeta looked back.
"It was good to see you." Pan expressed.
Vegeta gave a quick half smile then headed towards the exit.
Suddenly he stopped and without turning he spoke.
"I just wanted you to know...It wouldn't of been so bad having you as part of my family. Please forgive me and my son." and with that he stepped off the bus.
Words that left Pan not knowing what to think.
"He couldn't of mean't that." Pan thought as the bus pulled out of the stop.
-Pan's Apartment-
"It would be best if you did see a doctor on your time off after what happened Saturday I'm scared to leave you alone." Erasa Expressed.
"I know, I'm sorry look I'll make an appointment for Thursday they'll run a few tests and then I know from there. Seriously I think it's just all the stress I've been under I just need to unwind." Pan explained.
"I hope it's just that..." Erasa stated.
There was a knock at the door.
Pan looked at Erasa to see if she was expecting anyone Erasa simply shrug her shoulders. Pan walked over to the door and gently opened it peering through the corner.
"Hey..." Pan said seeing who it was.
"Hey...I hope I'm not bothering you."
"No, no...I just got home...come in." Pan said stepping aside.
"Pan who's at the--" Erasa started but stop as she saw who it was.
"Hey Goten ?" Erasa said as Goten kissed her on the cheek.
"Not much...So how's everything with you two?" Goten asked.
"No problems here." Erasa expressed.
"Um...so far so good I actually got a little time off from work this week." Pan explained.
" Let me get your coat it's warm in here." Erasa said slipping off Goten coat.
"Thanks..."
Erasa headed towards the closet but before that wisphered in Pan ear.
"Do you see the body on this guy...yum" Erasa said laughing abit as Pan smiled and pushed her away playfully.
"That's my uncle jeez." Pan whispered back.
Goten sort of blushed realizing they were probably talking about him.
"So Goten come lets sit on the couch." Pan said walking over there.
Pan stared at Goten as he sat next to her.
"You know theres always something about like I can see it in your face... you came here to ask me something right?" Pan asked.
Erasa sat on the arm rest of the couch next to Pan.
"...actually yeah I was wondering if you guys wanted to maybe have dinner with me at my place tonight." Goten asked cautiously.
"Oh wow...uh I don't know...um Erasa?" Pan asked unsure.
"I don't see why not." Erasa expressed.
"Well ok then sure." Pan said.
"Great uh just to warn you it is take out." Goten said a bit weary.
"Oh un I see." Pan said not being a fan of take out herself.
"Not that I'd mind take out, but if you really want to die happy me and Erasa could come up with something pretty edible right?." Pan turned to Erasa.
"I couldn't ask you to do that Pan the whole point was to treat you guys to something nice." Goten admitted.
"It would pretty nice to me to have that home cooked family dinner feeling back.
"Ok so how does this sound, how about you let me cook for everyone today." Pan said content.
"Really I would like to I mean you know in a way it'll kinda be like having a family dinner like... you know we use too." Pan explained.
"All right if it'll make you feel that way then sure." Goten said.
"MOMMY! my red crayon broke when I was coloring--GOTEN!" Nikita said jumping on Goten's lap.
"Hey how's my favorite lavender haired princess?" Goten said kissing Nikita on the cheek making her giggle.
"Good...I was drawing a picture of my friend and of you and Mommy and Erasa too." she explained excitedly.
"Can I see?"
"It's not finished ,I'll show you when I'm done." Nikita said swinging her feet as she sat on Goten lap.
"She's so adorable Pan , think soon she'll be as tall as you in about a week." Goten joked.
"What a cheap shot..." Pan said smiling.
"Hey Nikita you know your going to my house today?"
"Really!" Nikita asked excitedly.
"Yeah speaking of which before we do you need a bath." Pan said getting up.
"I got to get dressed too." Erasa said heading to her room.
"You don't mind waiting for a little while do you Goten?" Pan said.
"No not at all do what you got to do." Goten said
"Lets go Niki." Pan said signaling to her daughter.
"Don't go Goten I'll be back ok?" Nikita explained.
"I won't sweety, promise."
An hour later
"Nikita come here so Mommy can put your shoes on." Pan said entering the living room carrying a small pair of shoes and walking over to Nikita who sat on the couch next to Goten.
As Pan kneeled down to buckle her daughter shoes Goten sat there in awe staring at her.She was dressed in a red blouse tucked into her long black pants her nails painted ruby red as her lips and her long shiny black hair let loose down her shoulders to slightly covered her beautiful gold earrings the last present her mother ever gave.
She certainly didn't look like Pan , she looked so much older and so much more serious.
"Is everything okay..." Pan asked Goten as she noticed he was staring at her.
"Yeah...sorry it just that...I almost didn't recognize you." he admitted.
Pan blushed. "It's just make up...it's not really me." She said getting up walking towards her room.
"Did I say something wrong?" Goten asked himself out loud.
"Erasa told me Mommy's gets very self- self." Nikita said trying to remember the word
"Self- conscious?" .
"Uh huh sometimes about how pretty she looks." Nikita explained.
"It was easy to understand , Pan had been degraded into beliving so many things about herself her confidence was shot along with her pride she can't even look me in the face sometimes maybe because when I stare at her she thinks I'm juding her in every way." Goten thought.
An hour later
Goten apartment west Satan City
Goten turned the keys and opened the door and hit the light switch beside it as he entered.
Pan instantly was left in disbelief as she gazed around.
"Goten...this is a really, really nice apartment."
"That's an understatement for sure." Erasa expressed.
"How did you-just what do you do for a living." Pan asked stunned.
"Umm...I work in marketing...for a huge wirless phone service company" He explained.
"I should of known you and your cell phones go together like peaches and cream." Pan expressed.
" Oh cool you got a Fire place too." Erasa said.
"Yeah I'll lite it up as soon as the temperature drops this evening." Goten informed her.
"I guess I should get started." Pan said taking off her coat.
"Do you want me to help out Pan." Erasa offered.
"Sit spend some time with Goten I can handle things." Pan assured her walking into the kitchen.
"Hey Nikita do you want to watch a movie with me?" Goten asked.
"Yeah..." Nikita said sitting on the couch.
"What kind of movies do you like?"
"I like the ones with a lot of fighting and blood and--"
"Nikita Maria Son!" Pan called from the kitchen."
"Disney would be cool I guess." Nikita said taking that warning seriously from her mother.
Goten laughed a bit.
"She means well..." Goten explained to Nikita.
Erasa sat down next to Nikita.
"She says that now but if you did let her watch that movie she'll have me up all night crying saying that she doesn't want to go back to sleep and I'll end up having to sit with her until she tires herself out." Erasa explained.
Nikita just stuck her tongue out at Erasa.
Erasa returned the gesture.
Pan walked back to the living room.
"Ok how about this don't start drooling just yet, a Steak dinner with all the trimmings, white rice, chicken Cesar salad and for desert apple pie." Pan described.
"You serious?" Goten said mentally drooling.
"Yeah...sounds good huh? oh and Erasa I kinda do think I need your help."
"Sure no problem Pan." Erasa said getting up.
A few minutes Later
"So how you two doing?" Goten asked wandering into the kicthen.
"It's coming together." Erasa said.
"Goten pass me the garlic." Pan said preparing the steak.
"Here so Pan where did you learn how too cook?" Goten asked handing her garlic.
"Erasa taught me, and I started trying some things on my own and I kinda evolved into a better cook than Erasa." Pan explained.
"She starting with me, you heard her." Erasa pointed out.
"I'm just stating what is fact ." Pan teased
"¿Cómo puede usted decir eso? Cuando primero satisfice usted no podría hacerse los huevos revueltos sin algo que cogía en el fuego y otra cosa--"
"Here she goes..."
"Thats a surprize I didn't know you where latin Erasa?" Goten expressed.
"Yeah I was told that--I mean my mother was from puerto rico and my father was born here thats how I learned it from my mom." Erasa said laughing abit nervously.
"Oh what about your parents do they live in Satan city too?" Goten inquired.
"Oh no they--they moved to the states awhile back." She lied.
"Oh I bet you miss them huh?" Goten questioned.
"Yeah I uh--I do... can you use excuse me I have to use the bathroom Erasa said quickly walking off hiding a falling tear from her right eye.
"Did I say something wrong?" Goten asked Pan alittle bit confused.
"No...Goten promise me you won't tell her I said anything to you she would feel so embrassed." Pan explained.
"Yeah sure what is it?."
"You see Erasa really trying to paint a very pretty false picture over something devastating you see erasa's parents aren't really in the states not that I know of anyway she never had any parents."
"What do you mean."
"She was abandoned at the hospital as a new born, she was in and out of foster care nearly for the first 12 years of her life. She's been in homeless shelters she to beg at times for food in short excuse my language, life really fucked her over and she very sensitive about her past it's not your fault you didn't know but it would be best if the subject of her parents never comes up again.
"I had no idea, why would she lie..." Goten thought.
"Obviously she thought you think she was some kind of street rat or something." Pan explained.
"Aw man now I feel awful."
"Don't worry, look I'll be back let me check on her." Pan said heading towards the bathroom.
"Erasa it's Pan open up..."
The door unlocked.
"Hey...you ok?" Pan said as she saw Erasa leaning over the sink.
Pan walked over and rubbed her back alittle.
Erasa stood there quietly.
"I know sweety it hurts but listen he won't mention it anymore I told him that you really miss your parents and want to be with them and you get emotional when ever you think about them don't worry he understands ok?" Pan explained.
"Come on lets finish up the dinner ok?" Pan said taking her hand guiding her out of the bathroom.
Sometime later
"Ok every body, dinners ready. Nikita wait for Mommy to cut it for you." Pan advised.
"Pan this is really something I swear Mom would be jealous." Goten said enjoying himself.
"Oh stop..." Pan said flattered.
"You know what would go great with this?" Goten asked getting up and opening a small cabinet in the wall unit next to the T.V.
He held up a bottle of red wine.
"Just alittle for me thanks." Pan explained taking her seat.
"Same here it won't be pretty if I have too much." Erasa confessed.
"I want some!" Nikita annonced.
"Sorry sweety but your not old enough , but you can have the next best thing Pepsi." Pan said filling her daughters glass with it.
"That sucks." Nikita said making everbody laugh.
An hour Later
Pan sat with Goten at the dinner table Erasa and Nikita sat in Goten's room playing video games.
"You know Goten I was wondering why did you get such a big apartment if it's just you." Pan questioned.
Goten slowly put his drink down.
"That was during the time me and paris were together, we were going to start a family." Goten admitted.
"Can I ask why did you guys split up?" Pan wondered.
"It's a long and painful story I'll tell you some other time..." Goten explained.
"Goten...um--how's your mom doing?" Pan questioned.
"She's good...you know--she misses you...a lot." Goten said with a little bit of caution.
"And--my parents? you know--how are they doing?" Pan asked nervously.
"Good, good, you know there waiting for you always."
"Uh-"
"Everyone's fine well except--" Goten paused not knowing if he should say anything.
"Why do I get the feeling someone's not alright?" Pan expressed.
"Bura...she's in the hospital..."
"What, what happened?"
"Do you remeber that train that derailed four months ago?" Goten questioned.
"The express that takes you from one end of Satan city to the other?" Pan asked.
"Yeah...she was on it." Goten said
"Oh god, what kind of shape is she in?" Pan asked.
"The area of the train she was in was a corner that part of the train collasped inside her legs were nearly fully crushed under the metal.But she got away with no broken bone but there was so much bruising and muscle damage the bruising gone but and if you saw her wouldn't think she had even been in such an accident but the damage to her leg muscles and the pain that comes with it has left her learning how to walk all over again." Goten explained.
"Oh god, but she'll walk again right?" Pan asked with almost tears in her eyes.
"'Thats wishful thinking' one of the doctors told me." goten explained.
"Hows Bulma taking it? and vegeta." Pan asked concearned.
"Pretty well they've learned to except that possibilty."
"And Trunks-- hows he doing?" She questioned.
"Alright...you know."
"And the girl he's with?" Pan asked.
"How did you know he was with anyone?" Goten asked
"It didn't you just told me." Pan said slightly fooling Goten into telling her.
"He'll probably use her then when he's done throw away or totally forget about her he'll never find love I think." she said taking another shot of her drink.
"Pan...Trunks is married."
Pan's face just fell.
"Married?" Pan said almost in shock.
"Her name is cherry...they got married about three years ago."
Pan looked away trying to contemplate what she just heard.
"I know that's something hard to swallow but--" Goten began before he was cut off
"Goten?... what type of person is Cherry? I want your real feelings on her don't water it down for me please." Pan requested. Staring towards the floor speaking in a softer voice.
"Pan--" goten said in protest.
"Please...it's alright just tell me."
"She's very close to everyone especially your mom...everybody seems to just love her she's one of those people who can really make you feel better. Someone very giving and
considerate ,who always willing to lend a hand. She can even put a smile on Vegeta's face
sometimes she's a good person Pan I have nothing bad to say about her." Goten explained.
"G-Goten? does she know about me?" Pan asked as her body began to tremble alittle.
"She doesn't even know Videl has a daughter." Goten said almost regretfully.
Tears began to rolled down Pan's face.
"Everyone felt it was better if cherry didn't know , no-one wanted to put anything between their relationship." Goten
"That's really good Goten...I'm happy they found someone who-- someone who--" Pan stopped collapsing to her knees as she began to cry hysterically.
Goten rushed over too her kneeling beside her.
"Look at me Pan please... you don't have to feel that way." Goten said rubbing her back gently.
Erasa stood against a wall a few feet away listening.
"It really is better this way Goten...I don't need to bring my problems back into their lives...you know I lied to you before...about not wanting to go back home...that's all I've ever thought about but now I see there's no point there really is no place for me there anymore." Pan said as Goten pulled her close to him embracing her.
"Every single person over there has you their hearts , they just had to adjust to you not being there Pan but that doesn't mean you don't have a place in that family. I grantee you if you were to go back with Nikita you would get nothing but love, but you have to make it happen I can't force you." Goten explained.
"I don't think I'd even have the courage to stare anybody in the face..."
"You did to me..." Goten pointed out.
"You said it yourself, Trunks is happy with his life and everyone loves cherry now why do I want to change that?" Pan said weary of the idea.
"Because it's your right, that's your family too, Trunks family is your family because of Nikita and because Nikita deserves to know who her family is but most importantly who her father is." Goten expressed.
Pan began to remember, remembering what Vegeta had said.
"...It wouldn't of been so bad to have had you as part of my family." A thought at that moment that replayed itself over and over.
Pan just looked away in doubt.
"You can't continue to hide anymore , because if you do then you'll be admitting to everyone that you were wrong and Nikita should never been born and you know that's not true." Goten pointed out.
"Grandpa would want us to be together..." Pan thought.
"If I say yes--"
"We'll take it slow I promise." He said wiping some of the tears from Pan's face.
"Would you consider living here with me liked about what we talked about before?" Goten asked.
"I--where is--" Pan said looking around until she saw Erasa.
"Erasa come here." Pan said. Erasa slowly walked over to where Pan was kneeling and kneeled beside her.
"Erasa I want to do this, but I want you with on this ok?" Pan explained.
"Pan I can't I--" Erasa said unsure.
"Please I don't want to leave you alone , not after how much you've suffered."
"Pan don't." Erasa said realizing what Pan was referring too.
Goten slowly took Erasa's hand. Erasa looked up at him curiously.
"I know your worried that I would of thought differently about you because of how you grew up, that doesn't matter to me Erasa I like you for the person you are I like being around you and I would really like for you and Pan to be here with me." Goten said gently kissing Erasa on the lips.
Erasa began to turn red.
Pan smiled.
"I guess I could..." Erasa said still a little flushed from the kiss.
"Where's the little one so we can tell her." Goten said looking around.
"Nikita! come here sweety! " Pan called.
Nikita walked over from the room.
"What's everybody doing on the floor?" She asked as Pan took her hand.
"Niki, would you like to live here with me, Erasa and Uncle Goten?" Pan questioned.
"Huh?...Really?..That would be cool." She said content.
"Well I guess it's settled then..." Pan said raising from the floor.
"This is all for the better Pan." Goten expressed.
Pan thought about something for a moment then shared it with Goten.
"Goten would it be alright if me and Nikita went with you the next time you visit Bura?" Pan asked suddenly.
"Uh yeah sure, you really mean it?" Goten asked.
"If I'm going to start putting back pieces of my life I might as well start with her." Pan explained.
"It's really good to hear you say that. Come on I want to show you guys your rooms." Goten taking Erasa's hand.
"Pan you coming?"
"In a minute...I just need to think a little."
"Sure come on Nikita up you go." Goten said giving Nikita a piggy back ride then heading towards the rooms followed by Erasa.
Pan walked over to the living room window through it you could the whole city shining brightly throught the snow Pan slowly put her hand agains't the glass.
"You moved on...maybe that's what I should be doing." Pan said letting her hand fall gently from the glass walking away.
Somewhere else in the city
"Trunks sweety are you ok?"
"Yeah I was just looking out at the city for a little bit." He responded.
"Something on your mind?" she asked.
"No no one, I'm sorry lets go to bed." Trunks said heading towards his room.
"Why did he say no one?" Cherry said looking out towards the city then closed the curtians.
Authors Notes
Very sorry a hundred apologies to everyone who been waiting for this chapter for so long I hope you like this chapter and the next will be out shortly it's 50 done I was working on both at the same time.
Check my profile page to get a chapter summary of upcoming chapters.