*WARNING*
This chapter has been known to mentally scar people who are sensitive to the following things:
Cheese
Flamingoes
Constipation
If not, go ahead and read but be afraid, be VERY afraid (you might lose a few points off your IQ)!!!!!!
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Title: Happily Ever After (With a Little Bit of Butt Kicking In Between)
Authors: Mstar (Mary-chan) and Mystic Moon (Jessi-chan)
E-mail: NutCase55@worldbreak.com and jessimotto@1colony.com
Chapter: 2~Flamingoes...Cheese...Constipation...Need I Say More?
Rating: G (except for some constipation...don't ask)
Summary: Serena is forced to join a reading club at her school due to her below average reading grade. It doesn't help that her mortal enemy's the instructor. But when a Nega-creep with "special" powers attacks in the middle of a meeting, the world becomes a Sleeping Beauty story (YES, Sleeping Beauty, NOT Cinderella. That is SO cliché.) with a MAJOR twist (and a little bit of butt kicking, of course ^^).
Genre: U & M Romance/Comedy/Alternate Reality
Disclaimer: Jessi-chan doesn't own Sailor Moon, and once again I say, I don't either *Waaaaaaaaah*! Sailor Moon is the property of Ms. Naoko Takeucki, and to whom I would like to ask, "Can you put Sailor Moon up for sell for-*looks in pocket*-25 cents, a rubber band, and some pocket lint?" Sleeping Beauty belongs to Disney, yada, yada, yada… Fantasia the monster was MY idea and all that other junk I wrote in the disclaimer for the 1st chapter. Bugs Bunny is NOT mine, and neither is Robin Hood, even though the trees in this story belong to whichever wood nymph that occupies it.
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By the way, sometimes what I put in these notes and disclaimers, might just be foreshadowing *hint, hint*? And to all you people concerned for Jessi-chan's state of mind, SHE HAS FULLING RECOVERED FROM THE FLAMINGOES (so STOP bothering me!!!)! Also, to all of the members of the Save the Flamingoes Foundation, no flamingoes were harmed in the making of this story (although Jessi-chan will have problems in the future that only costly visits to a psychiatrist can cure). ..... denotes thought and *.....* are author's notes.
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"Serena, you have to get married to the prince!" Flora/Mina cried. "Yes, you must!" agreed Amy/Merriweather. "But I'm in love!" Serena wailed. Serena was play acting. She knew EXACTLY what was going on. She just wanted to finish the story. But I might actually BE in love! NO!!! MORE bad thoughts!!!!! Serena may have denied it, but that thought still lingered on her mind. It wasn't until they arrived at the castle, that Serena remembered what happened to the prince, next in the story. Okay, he arrives at the cottage then… "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!" Lita/Fawna peeped in and asked, "Is everything okay?" "Yes," Serena replied, trying her best to remain calm. Lita/Fawna left and Serena started pacing. This can NOT be happening. Darien could get KILLED!!! AND I ACTUALLY CARE!!!!!! AND THERE'S STILL THE FACT THAT I MIGHT LOVE THE CONCEDED EGOMANIAC!!!!!!!!!!!! There's no might you know... OH NO!!! I'M NOT STARTING AN ARGUMENT WITH MY CONSCIENCE AGAIN!!! But still… LA, LA, LA!!! I'M NOT LISTENING!!!!! Youlikehim!Youlikehim!Youlikehim! SHUT UP!!!!!!!!! YouLOVEhim!YouLOVEhim!YouLovehim! FINE!!! I ADMIT IT!!! I'M IN LOVE WITH THE BOY!!!!!!!! Serena's full-scale war with her inner conscience was interrupted by the door opening and Rei coming in, chanting, "Have no worries, have no fear, Robin Hood will soon be here!" Serena sighed and said exasperatedly, "Can't you see there's a fight going on inside myself?" "No," Rei replied rather matter-of-factly. "Well, THAT DOESN'T MATTER!!!" Serena continued. "This is STILL the wrong story!" "FINE! BE that way!" Rei said sarcastically and stormed off. Serena suddenly noticed a green-ish light glowing at the end of the hallway. Serena walked out into the hallway, walking towards the light, she reached out her hand and turned the doorknob and saw-*Sorry to leave you hanging, but I must leave the room and come back later because Jessi just cracked a rat (in laymen's terms, farted) and it STUNK!!! (camera zooms in on a blushing-yet for some odd reason, proud-Jessi) "It must be a side-affect of eating all those roasted flamingoes (on a stick!)…yuuuuuuuuuuum!!!" 2 hour later- Okay, I think it's safe to return to the computer now. Sorry for any inconveniences my airfreshonerly challenged friend may have caused you as we now resume our story.*-Fantasia sitting on the toilet. "Oops! Wrong door!" Serena said as she quickly closed the door. As I we *I provide the plot, Jessi the insanity.* were saying, she reached out her hand and turned this time the RIGHT doorknob, but stopped, for she saw a note written on pink writing paper with a flamingo border taped to the door.
Dear Serena,
Currently, um, my butt is experiencing technical difficulties so please give me an hour, or 2. I had too much cheese.
Thanks,
Fantasia
~1 hour later~
Fantasia opened the door and peeked her head out. "Um, could you give me another 30 minutes?" Serena nodded and Fantasia disappeared back into the bathroom.
~30 minutes later~
Fantasia came out of the bathroom and Serena asked, "Done now?" "Yes, but ummmmmmm, don't go in there with out air freshener." "Thanks for the tip." "Anyway, back to the story, let's go on with the spindle thingy. I have to be at the cottage in 30 minutes." "Okay, just go easy on Darien will ya? See, I kinda have a crush on him." "Figures," Fantasia replied, rolling her eyes. They entered the room together and in the middle of the room sat a sole spinning wheel with an extremely sharp spindle. "Um, on 2nd thought, I don't really want to prick myself," Serena said uneasily. "I'll give you some cheese," Fantasia said slyly, holding out a chunk of swiss. "OK!!!" Serena answered, perking right up. Serena reached out her index finger, setting it onto the sharp tip of the spindle. She pulled her finger back slightly so it would prick. "Ouch!" Serena wailed. "Wait a second! If I'm going to be asleep, how am I going to eat my ch-." Serena then collapsed before she could finish her sentence. "Sucker!" Fantasia shouted at the sleeping girl as she threw the cheese up in the air and caught it.
Darien walked towards the woodcutter's cottage, where Sleeping Beauty stays in the story, with a sense of dread that left him feeling rather nauseous. He knew exactly what was going to happen, but if he wanted to get out of this story, he would have to go along with it anyway. I never got to tell Serena I love her. Darien felt a loan tear role down his cheek. This is serious. The last time I cried, it was when my parents died all those years ago... He knew he might die. This was no longer fiction. At least I got to kiss her. But Darien still had his regrets. I never got to apologize to Serena for all those times I made fun of her. And I never got to tell Andrew good-bye, and, and..., and thanks. He was the 1st person to ever reach me. He was my friend when everyone else shunned me and my quiet ways. Darien's eyes let out 1 more tear then stopped. He had reached the cottage. He reached out his hand to turn the doorknob. Do I dare? Darien knew death lurked behind that door. Do it for Serena, no not just for Serena, do it for the world. It's hard to think about how much chaos the Negaverse could of caused by now. Fantasia was probably used to get us out of the way. But think about what would happen if we NEVER returned. If I don't walk through that door, we'll NEVER return, but if I do, there's still a chance, there's still hope. This pensive moment was soon interrupted by guess who? "Have no worries, have no fear, Robin Hood will soon be here!" Darien sighed and said in reply, "Will you shut up? And this is STILL the wrong story!" Rei turned around and stomped off, looking thoroughly offended. Darien rolled his eyes and turned back to the matter at hand. Serena, if we ever get through this, you so owe me... Darien turned the doorknob and walked in, only to be attacked by a hoard of pink flamingoes. "Do you mind?" Darien yelled as he shook 1 off his arm. "I'm going to go peacefully, ONLY because I want to get OUT of here. "FINE. Be that way..." said Fantasia sarcastically. "Take him away boys!" And with that, they queer party made their way away from the cottage. "Oh by the way," replied Fantasia. "Want some cheese?"