GF- Time for Pt 3! Bwa ha ha ha!
Target- Hewooo!
GF- Shut the f--k up Target!
Target- Make me loser monkey! Ahahaha!
GF- *slaps target* DIE BITCH!!! GAAAAH!
Target- Looks like I was put in my place. -__-*
GF- Yes!!!! ^.^ Okay, on with the story! ****
*the DM arrives back home in the late evening*
DM- *wearily* Fweeeew... *hears DMG singing to herself* What the???
DMG- I will survive! I will surrr-vive! Whooo! Yeah! Go me! *giggles*
DM- O.o *hauling all the shit into the bathroom* Whats going on?!
DMG- *happy to see him* YAY! MASTER! YOU'RE BACK! *sees all the crap he brought in* What's all this? Oooo! Is it toys? Are we building a rocket? *claps her hands excitedly*
DM- Umm... no... *sees the "mess" in the bathroom* Looks like you made quite a mess...huh?
DMG- Mm-hm! *blinks perkily* How can we build a rocket with cotton balls?? Ooo! What are these!? *picks up a box of tampons* Hm... Tam-pons... Really! *opens the box and takes one out* Hey! It looks like a gun! These are cool! What are they for?
DM- We're not building a rocket... These things are gonna help stop the bleeding... I hope.
DMG- *pushes the applicator hard and the tampon shoots out and hits Darky in the face* POW! You're dead! *laughs, sort of giggly*
DM- O.o Don't do that. These are not toys. Now... let's see how this works... *reading a box of tampons and pads* Hmmm...
DMG- *rumagging through the pile* Hey! What are these for, Darky? *holds up a box of Stay Puff Marshmallows* Are we gonna use these?
DM- O.o?? Oh! Those are... mine! *snags the marshmallows and shoves two in his mouth, he smiles* Mmm... good... *too himself* Wonder how these got in here???
DMG- Oooo! Let's play chubby bunny! *giggles* ^_^
DM- *manages to swallow the marshmallows* No...no... we have to stop that bleeding first... Now, here are the directions for a tampon and a pad.
DMG- *looks at the DM, confused* What do they do?
DM- Umm...Well...*sweatdrop* the pad goes on the outside of you... on your underpants... And... the tampon... Er... it goes... inside... you know...up... there....
DMG- Oh... Maybe I'll use the... tampon instead of the pad. *takes one out of the box* Hmmm... *reads the directions* Umm...
DM- Well... I think I'll leave you to your... business... O-kay? *gets up to leave*
DMG- NO! Wait Darky! *eyes wide*
DM- What?... What's wrong? *blinks and comes to her side*
DMG- Well... Umm...*shows him the directions* I can't read these!!! *panic* Besides! What the hell is bano?! *pronounces it bono*
DM- *takes the instructions from her* It's bano, sweetheart... And you were looking at the spanish side of the instructions. *he smiles warmly at her*
DMG- Oh...*she looks at the english set* Thanks, Darky-Poo! ^___^
DM- *blushes* Sure... No problem... Now I'll be just out here... o-kay? Yell if you need anything.
DMG- WAIT! MAA-AASTER!
DM- What? What's wrong now? *clueless*
DMG- I don't understand... What is that? *points at a picture on the instructions*
DM- Thats... The tampon. *looks at her*
DMG- Oh... Well, what is this? *points at another picture*
DM- *blushes* Um... Well... That's... that's... you.
DMG- Me? *points at herself*
DM- Yes...
DMG- You mean that's me? In the instructions?! Woooo-hoo! My ovaries are famous!
DM- NO! No! That's not YOU! That's... what you look like... inside!... Where did you learn the word ovary?
DMG- It's says so right here! *shows him*
DM- Ohh... I see...
DMG- Darky, I need to know how to do this... Could you help me?
DM- Umm... *scratches head nervously*
DMG- Pweease?? Darky?? *puppy dog eyes*
DM- No... not puppy dog eyes... I... can't resist... too...cute... Oh, alright, I'll help you.
DMG-Yay! ^___^
DM- Hold on... one moment... *runs out of the bathroom and returns with a doll and an exacto-knife*
DMG- What's the knife for?? What are you gonna do to the doll, Master?
DM- I'm gonna help you... I'll show you how its done! *takes the knife and cuts a huge hole you know where!*
DMG- O.o HOLY CRAP! What did you do that for? *DM takes the tampon and "inserts" it in the doll* Oh...Oh... I get it now! So I have to... *points at the tampon*
DM- Yup.
DMG- In... me? *points at herself*
DM- Uhh-huh! Can you do that?
DMG- Sure!...Can you... um... *points out the door*
DM- Yes! Yes! Sure thing! *leaves the bathroom and closes the door* I hope she'll be o-kay...
*he hears the DMG start to sing again*
DMG- Girls just wanna have fu-un. Oh, girls! Just wanna have fun!
DM- *shakes his head* Strange girl... *laughs to himself*
DMG- *changes the song* 99...red balloons! Uh... do, do, do, do, do! *humming*
DM- O.o Hmm... *eats more marshmallows*
DMG- *comes out of the bathroom* Umm... Tah-dah! *laughs*
DM- Did you do it?!
DMG- Yup! ^__^ Sure did!
DM- Did you do it right?
DMG- Umm... I think so!
DM- Did you put it in the right place?
DMG- I think!
DM- Are you still bleeding?
DMG- Nope.
DM- Then you put it in the right place!
DMG- Was I supposed to put the string up there too? Cause I did... *nervously*
DM- O.o****** OH SHIT! *wide eyed*
DMG- What?! What's wrong?! Was I not supposed to?! DARKY!! *hugs him* I'M GONNA DIE!!! *crying*
DM- Just calm down... You're not gonna die... but we need to go to the hospital!!
***And that'll be part 4! Ha ha ha ha! Algebra is the ultimate evil!
GF
Target- Hewooo!
GF- Shut the f--k up Target!
Target- Make me loser monkey! Ahahaha!
GF- *slaps target* DIE BITCH!!! GAAAAH!
Target- Looks like I was put in my place. -__-*
GF- Yes!!!! ^.^ Okay, on with the story! ****
*the DM arrives back home in the late evening*
DM- *wearily* Fweeeew... *hears DMG singing to herself* What the???
DMG- I will survive! I will surrr-vive! Whooo! Yeah! Go me! *giggles*
DM- O.o *hauling all the shit into the bathroom* Whats going on?!
DMG- *happy to see him* YAY! MASTER! YOU'RE BACK! *sees all the crap he brought in* What's all this? Oooo! Is it toys? Are we building a rocket? *claps her hands excitedly*
DM- Umm... no... *sees the "mess" in the bathroom* Looks like you made quite a mess...huh?
DMG- Mm-hm! *blinks perkily* How can we build a rocket with cotton balls?? Ooo! What are these!? *picks up a box of tampons* Hm... Tam-pons... Really! *opens the box and takes one out* Hey! It looks like a gun! These are cool! What are they for?
DM- We're not building a rocket... These things are gonna help stop the bleeding... I hope.
DMG- *pushes the applicator hard and the tampon shoots out and hits Darky in the face* POW! You're dead! *laughs, sort of giggly*
DM- O.o Don't do that. These are not toys. Now... let's see how this works... *reading a box of tampons and pads* Hmmm...
DMG- *rumagging through the pile* Hey! What are these for, Darky? *holds up a box of Stay Puff Marshmallows* Are we gonna use these?
DM- O.o?? Oh! Those are... mine! *snags the marshmallows and shoves two in his mouth, he smiles* Mmm... good... *too himself* Wonder how these got in here???
DMG- Oooo! Let's play chubby bunny! *giggles* ^_^
DM- *manages to swallow the marshmallows* No...no... we have to stop that bleeding first... Now, here are the directions for a tampon and a pad.
DMG- *looks at the DM, confused* What do they do?
DM- Umm...Well...*sweatdrop* the pad goes on the outside of you... on your underpants... And... the tampon... Er... it goes... inside... you know...up... there....
DMG- Oh... Maybe I'll use the... tampon instead of the pad. *takes one out of the box* Hmmm... *reads the directions* Umm...
DM- Well... I think I'll leave you to your... business... O-kay? *gets up to leave*
DMG- NO! Wait Darky! *eyes wide*
DM- What?... What's wrong? *blinks and comes to her side*
DMG- Well... Umm...*shows him the directions* I can't read these!!! *panic* Besides! What the hell is bano?! *pronounces it bono*
DM- *takes the instructions from her* It's bano, sweetheart... And you were looking at the spanish side of the instructions. *he smiles warmly at her*
DMG- Oh...*she looks at the english set* Thanks, Darky-Poo! ^___^
DM- *blushes* Sure... No problem... Now I'll be just out here... o-kay? Yell if you need anything.
DMG- WAIT! MAA-AASTER!
DM- What? What's wrong now? *clueless*
DMG- I don't understand... What is that? *points at a picture on the instructions*
DM- Thats... The tampon. *looks at her*
DMG- Oh... Well, what is this? *points at another picture*
DM- *blushes* Um... Well... That's... that's... you.
DMG- Me? *points at herself*
DM- Yes...
DMG- You mean that's me? In the instructions?! Woooo-hoo! My ovaries are famous!
DM- NO! No! That's not YOU! That's... what you look like... inside!... Where did you learn the word ovary?
DMG- It's says so right here! *shows him*
DM- Ohh... I see...
DMG- Darky, I need to know how to do this... Could you help me?
DM- Umm... *scratches head nervously*
DMG- Pweease?? Darky?? *puppy dog eyes*
DM- No... not puppy dog eyes... I... can't resist... too...cute... Oh, alright, I'll help you.
DMG-Yay! ^___^
DM- Hold on... one moment... *runs out of the bathroom and returns with a doll and an exacto-knife*
DMG- What's the knife for?? What are you gonna do to the doll, Master?
DM- I'm gonna help you... I'll show you how its done! *takes the knife and cuts a huge hole you know where!*
DMG- O.o HOLY CRAP! What did you do that for? *DM takes the tampon and "inserts" it in the doll* Oh...Oh... I get it now! So I have to... *points at the tampon*
DM- Yup.
DMG- In... me? *points at herself*
DM- Uhh-huh! Can you do that?
DMG- Sure!...Can you... um... *points out the door*
DM- Yes! Yes! Sure thing! *leaves the bathroom and closes the door* I hope she'll be o-kay...
*he hears the DMG start to sing again*
DMG- Girls just wanna have fu-un. Oh, girls! Just wanna have fun!
DM- *shakes his head* Strange girl... *laughs to himself*
DMG- *changes the song* 99...red balloons! Uh... do, do, do, do, do! *humming*
DM- O.o Hmm... *eats more marshmallows*
DMG- *comes out of the bathroom* Umm... Tah-dah! *laughs*
DM- Did you do it?!
DMG- Yup! ^__^ Sure did!
DM- Did you do it right?
DMG- Umm... I think so!
DM- Did you put it in the right place?
DMG- I think!
DM- Are you still bleeding?
DMG- Nope.
DM- Then you put it in the right place!
DMG- Was I supposed to put the string up there too? Cause I did... *nervously*
DM- O.o****** OH SHIT! *wide eyed*
DMG- What?! What's wrong?! Was I not supposed to?! DARKY!! *hugs him* I'M GONNA DIE!!! *crying*
DM- Just calm down... You're not gonna die... but we need to go to the hospital!!
***And that'll be part 4! Ha ha ha ha! Algebra is the ultimate evil!
GF