A/N: Hey ya'll. I'm still massively depressed about the whole Jeff deal.
And now I got more probs. Oh gee, there's a surprise! Lol Anyways, I'm
in the process of trying to tell my parents I'm thinking about trying
wrestling. All my life, I've been the music child. I sang, danced, wrote
lyrics, hummed anything, ya know. And music still runs my life, but like
Jeff, I have other interests, which happens to be wrestling. Growing up,
all I wanted to do was make it big in the music world. Ever since I can
remember I sang. And dancing, well, for someone who's never had a lesson
in their life, I sure as hell can move. I got so many compliments at my
sister's wedding when I was 15. And I always was in sync with a friend of
mine, who actually took lessons, at dances. But I knew that I would never
make it in the music business because I live in Maine. And let's face it,
MAINE SUCKS!! Lol So, I decide, I'm gonna be a record producer, ya know,
make the cds. Well, that's not really what I wanna do. And good luck with
finding a school that actually has that as a major. Or finding people that
actually know what you're talking about! Lol So now, I've wasted a year
at college doing nothing. So basically, I'm fucked. Lol And all that I
keep goin back to in my mind, is trying wrestling school this summer. But
I have problem with that. The only school up here, pretty much sucks.
Although it has its own fed, it sucks. The fed sucks! Lol Yeah, it might
be a place to start, but what if I take my money and time and put it into
this school and hate it. But what if it's just this school. I could be
putting all my money into this sucky school and not have any left over for
a better school someplace else. So, I'm fucked, once again. Anyways,
again thanks to GoddessInBondage for Lizzie. Love ya chica!! Lol And to
those of you that read Without You, no, I haven't stopped the story, I'm
just stuck! Lol In a bad place. Welcome to muses on vacation, or some
shit! Lol I dunno, but I have nothing for that story right now. I will
update eventually, I promise. And I hate people. Right now, I don't trust
a damn person I considered a friend, cause they've now turned on me. I
guess I'm only supposed to be around for them when they have a problem. If
they're having fun or whatever, I'm not allowed to be around them. At
least I know where I stand now. It may have taken me 19 years to figure
this out, but better late than never, right? And the two songs I used are
"Turn Me One Mr. Deadman" by Union Underground and "Failure" by Unloco.
Now that I've taken up pretty much a page on NOTHINGness, I'll get to the
story!
*******************
"I'll see you at home C," Adam called he walked out of the art class room once the bell rung. She waved to him as she tried to gather her stuff.
"Cinder, may I speak with you?" Mrs. Curt, the senior art teacher asked.
"Sure Mrs. Curt," Cinder smiled as she shouldered her bag. "Is there something wrong?"
"Oh no. Not at all. You are one of my best students. If you weren't, I wouldn't have insisted you transfer to my class," she laughed. "No, my junior class has a bright and talented student. And he drew a picture of you for his project."
"Yeah, he wouldn't let me see that," Cinder laughed.
"Yes, I know. He asked me to show it to you. And I have some questions about it," she said as she pulled out the picture.
"Did he get a good grade on it?" Cinder asked.
"Oh yes. He got an A+ on it," she smiled. Cinder smiled happily as she looked over the pencil drawing. It was of her from the shoulders up, her hair down and flowing, looking out a window. She cocked her head to the side in thought as she looked up at her teacher. "It's beautiful."
"Yes it is, but I don't totally understand it. I was hoping you could help me."
"Um, I can try."
"Well, I know that you are good friends with Jeff. And that's why he drew you. But I just don't really understand the whole drawing. What's your take on it? He went far beyond what the project was. He seemed to have told some sort of story in the drawing," Mrs. Curt said as Cinder examined the picture carefully. She seemed to be leaning on a window sill with tears streaming down her face. Jeff's arm was around her in a friendly way, almost like he was rubbing her arm comfortingly. And out the window was a man carrying bags as he walked down the road away from the house.
"Oh my," Cinder choked out.
"What's the matter?"
"I think that's my father," Cinder replied as she looked up at her teacher.
"Why would he draw your father leaving the house? Does he go away on business a lot?"
"He left me and my brother when he found out my mom was pregnant with me," Cinder said quietly.
"I see. And do you talk about it much?"
"Not at all. In fact I've only mentioned it once. Like the nite that I met Jeff," Cinder replied.
"Well, I was thinking about transferring him into this class. He's very talented," Mrs. Curt said as she put away the drawing.
"Yeah, I think he has study hall this period," Cinder said.
"Great. Well that's all I really wanted. Are you going to be alright hun? You don't look too well."
"I'm fine," Cinder answered wrapping her arms around herself.
"Well, bye Cinder. Good luck in your competition tomorrow."
"Thanks Mrs. Curt," Cinder smiled as she left the room.
"C! There you are! I've been looking for you," Lizzie yelled as she ran towards her cousin. Cinder smiled at her as she tried to push her thoughts away. "Have I told you lately how much I love bein here?"
"Um, yeah, this morning," Cinder laughed. "How was Euro history with Shannon?"
"It was great! He's such a dork!" Lizzie laughed as they walked down the hall. "Hey, is something wrong?"
"No, I just have to find Jeff and talk to him about some stuff," Cinder answered.
"Oh? What about?" Lizzie asked curiously as they stood outside the geometry room.
"Just about the picture he drew for his art class. Anyways, I'll see you later. Don't forget that I have cheering practice after school. You can either come watch or get a ride on the bus," Cinder said.
"I'll watch cause there's no way in hell I'm riding the bus!" Lizzie laughed as she headed off for her last period class. "See ya cuz!"
"Later!" Cinder waved as she found her seat next to Shane. Shane gave her a heart felt smile as the bell rang.
********************
"You should have seen the competition! It was horrible!" Cinder exclaimed as she, Trish, Amy, and Lizzie sat in her room Sunday nite.
"Yeah, we sucked so bad. Just be glad you weren't there to witness it guys," Trish laughed.
"So what's this mean?" Lizzie asked.
"Well, since we came in 10th out of 15, we didn't qualify for competitions in December," Cinder answered with a sigh as she pulled on a pair of lounge pants.
"Cinder, Jeff's here!" Adam yelled up the stairs.
"Did you ever talk to him about his drawing?" Lizzie asked as Cinder headed out the door.
"That's what I'm doin now," Cinder smiled.
"Hey, what's up?" Jeff asked as Cinder met him on the stairs.
"What was up with the picture you drew?" Cinder asked as they sat on the stairs.
"What do you mean?" Jeff asked nervously.
"Well, you drew me with tears in my eyes and a man walking away. What was that all about?"
"Well, when I was drawing you and my Dad was in the room interacting with Matt, I saw this envious look in your eyes. You wish you had your Dad," Jeff said.
"How could you know that?"
"It was just the look you had. And I thought that would be a good thing to draw. I hope that's okay."
"Yeah, it was a good picture, but I don't cry. I never have, never will," Cinder said rather harshly as she stood up and walked up to her room.
"So?" Amy asked.
"Nevermind," Cinder said shaking her head as she sat on her bed.
"Hey, you girls wanna come down and watch a movie with us? Some of the guys are on their way over," Adam said as he walked into Cinder's room unannounced.
"Like who?" Amy asked.
"Well, your boyfriend is already here, Jeff, Shannon, Shane, and Jay. And my Alanah will be coming too," Adam answered with a smile.
"Um, yeah, we'll be down in a bit," Cinder replied.
"Your mom is gonna let us watch movies this late with all these people?" Lizzie asked.
"Yeah, well, she's got a date I guess," Cinder shrugged as the group of girls walked down to the living room. Cinder had just sat on the couch when the doorbell rang.
"I'll get it!" both Jeff and Cinder called. They smiled at each other and walked to the door.
"DAD?!" Jeff exclaimed as he opened the door.
"Mr. Hardy?!" Cinder exclaimed just as shocked as Jeff was.
"What are you doing here?" Jeff asked.
"Well, hello Gilbert," Leeann smiled as she walked passed Jeff and Cinder. "Don't wait up!" Jeff and Cinder's mouths dropped to the floor as they watched their parent walk off hand in hand.
"Was that mom's date?" Adam asked as he carried a bowl of popcorn into the living room.
"Yeah," Cinder managed to say through her shock.
"Matt, did you know that Dad had a date tonite?" Jeff asked as he and Cinder walked back into the living room slowly.
"Yeah, I kinda figured that's why he was gettin all dressed up," Matt answered. "Why the look?"
"My mom is dating your dad," Cinder answered.
"Are you serious?!" Adam and Matt exclaimed.
"Um, yeah," Jeff and Cinder replied in unison.
"Well, just think, we could all become one big happy family!" Lizzie laughed. Cinder shot her a death glare before sitting down next to Adam.
Eventually the other's showed up and they had a great nite. They barely watched any movies. Instead they made it into a dance party that never seemed to end. Lizzie and Cinder entertained them by trying to sing their version of Garth Brook's "I've got Friends in low places". Needless to say, they thought it was a joke. Shannon and Lizzie had cuddled up most of the nite while there seemed to be some sort of spark between Jeff and Trish. Shane had stayed to himself much of the time, glancing over at Cinder every once in awhile.
"Oh my God, I'm so tired. I'm goin to bed, ya'll," Cinder announced as she stood from her seat on the floor. "I just can't stay up any longer."
"What time is it?" Jay asked in mid laugh.
"Midnite," Cinder answered before yawning.
"C, it's so early still," Lizzie said while laughing at one of Shannon's lame jokes.
"Yeah, but I need some sleep if I'm gonna go to school tomorrow," Cinder smiled as she headed up the stairs. She curled into her bed and shortly fell asleep, trying to ignore the ruckus going on in her living room.
*********************
'Turn me on turn me on Mr. Deadman
Yeah I want it
I need it
To make a million
Yeah I love it
A fuckin' rockstar'
Cinder groaned as her radio alarm went off, signaling that morning had come. She tried to stretch but felt a body holding her tightly. She breathed in deeply, almost in panic, smelling a familiar smell, but she couldn't place who it was. She kept her eyes shut, almost scared to open them to find out who it was. Finally she got up the nerve and opened them. Shane's green hair was the first thing she saw. She had only had 3 guys sleep in her bed, Adam, Jay, and Shannon. This was a different experience and she knew that there was more to this than what had been with Shannon sleeping with her. She frowned as his brown eyes slowly began to open.
"Morning," he smiled.
"Yeah, um, morning. Can I ask why you're in my bed?" she asked.
"I um, well, there really wasn't any room down in the living room cause everyone crashed here, so I thought it'd be alright if I slept in here with you. Are you upset?" he asked as they sat up.
"No, I just didn't expect you to be in my bed. Why not stay in Adam's room?" she asked.
"Alanah," he smiled.
"Ah, well, what about my mom's room. I'm sure she never came back," Cinder laughed.
"Um, I think Amy and Matt were in there. So Trish and Jeff took the floor of the living room, Jay is on the couch, and Lizzie and Shannon in her room. So, I was kinda the odd man."
"Yes, Shane, you are an odd man, but that's besides the point," Cinder joked. "Why did you sleep in my bed? Why not on the floor?"
"Oh wow, look at the time. I gotta get home so I can be on time for school," he smiled as he rushed towards the door.
"Shane!" Cinder yelled.
"Later C!" he said as he shut the door behind him. Cinder sat on her bed staring at the door for quite sometime.
'So what if I lost everything
Would you want me if I was a failure
So what if I lost everything
Would you be there even when I am gone'
She turned to her alarm and hit hard, causing it to fall off her nitestand. Since it looked to be a cold day out, she pulled on a pair of faded blue jeans that had colored patches over the holes in the jeans and a ripped up long sleeve black shirt that she placed over a bright pink tank top. She pulled on her sneakers, pulled on a bandana to hold her hair, and skipped down the stairs, ready for the day. She smiled at the group that sat in the kitchen, drinking strong cups of steaming coffee.
"Morning," she chirped brightly as she grabbed a glass and some orange juice.
"Why are you so, chipper?" Jay asked sounding as though he'd be unable to tell anyone his name.
"Cause unlike you dorks, I went to bed," she smiled as Lizzie dragged herself down the stairs.
"Don't smile at me," she growled at Cinder causing her to laugh.
"Oh cheer up. I hear you had a certain blonde in your bed last nite," Cinder said.
"Mmmhmmm," Lizzie smiled. "I'll tell ya about it later." Cinder nodded as she moved into the living room.
"Hey, where's Shane?" Matt questioned.
"Yeah, Cinder. He did stay in your room last nite," Jay smirked.
"Nothing happened. I slept, he slept, we both slept. He went home," she replied.
"Where'd he sleep?" Amy asked curiously as she sat on the couch next to Cinder.
"With me.............in my bed," Cinder whispered.
"ARE YOU SERIOUS?!" Amy exclaimed.
"Shhh. I don't want Adam to know," Cinder replied.
"Sorry, but you slept together?!" Amy whispered.
"Yeah, I woke up to him holding me," Cinder replied a slight smile creeping on her face although she tried to hide it.
"Are you two gonna hook up?" Trish piped in as ate a spoonful of cereal.
"No, we're just friends. It just happened like that. It's no big deal," Cinder shrugged. "But what was goin on between you and Jeff last nite?"
"Yeah, I'm kinda curious about that too," Lizzie smiled as she sat on the other side of Cinder.
"I don't know. He's sweet. I mean true, he's not really my type, but there's just this attraction to him that I feel," Trish smiled dreamily.
"Awe," the others cried before bursting out in laughter.
"What about you and the Moore-On Lizzie?" Amy asked.
"Oh my God. I like him so much. He's so cute. Yeah, he's a dork, but he's a cute dork. And I think we might just go out on Friday," she answered with almost a giddy smile.
"Wow, you all have someone, and for once I'm alone," Cinder said as her smile faded.
"C, you so didn't need Charlie. He was an asshole," Amy said.
"Yeah, but I still loved him," Cinder sighed.
"Hey, can borrow some clothes from you two so we don't have to go back home?" Trish asked. Lizzie and Cinder nodded at them and led them upstairs.
"I love those jeans, Cin. Where'd you get em?" Lizzie asked.
"I made em," Cinder smiled. "You know how I've always been. I always made my own clothes."
"And you always got yelled at for it too!" Lizzie laughed.
"Yeah, but my Mom has finally come to accept it," Cinder laughed as she walked into her room. She stopped short, seeing Jeff standing next to her dresser, looking at pictures. "What are you doin in here?"
"Oh, I um, I was wondering if you had those clothes that I let you borrow when you were at my house," he smiled.
"Oh yeah, they're even clean," Cinder laughed.
"Is this you and Adam?" he asked holding out a picture to her. Adam's hair was much shorter than it was now and she wasn't as girly as she was now. She guessed they were about 9.
"Yeah, that's us," she said.
"You two almost look like twins," he laughed.
"Oh, yeah, I know. People always thought we were the cutest things cause we looked so much. We were always mistaken for twins. It was really good, cause we always got so much attention, but it was so annoying cause people always wanted to see us together and smile. It was so bad," she replied.
"You and Lizzie look a lot alike. Sister like actually," he said.
"We were so close growing up. She'd often spend vactions or summer with us cause her parents travel. It was always great to have her around. Adam hated it, cause he was always the only boy around. We used to get mistaken for sisters and we loved it," she said.
"I um, I wanted to ask you about your dad," Jeff said nervously.
"Mmy Dad? Why?" she asked.
"Why'd he walk out?" Jeff asked.
"I don't know. He just did," Cinder answered as if she'd rather have not talked about it.
"Have you ever tried to find him?"
"No. Never," she said harshly.
"Why? Don't you wanna know why he left? Or if you look like him?" he asked.
"Adam and I obviously do! We didn't get this blonde wavy hair and blue eyes from our mother!" she exclaimed.
"But don't you wanna know for sure?"
"Jeff, just shut up!" Lizzie exclaimed as she walked into Cinder's room.
"Huh?" Jeff asked.
"Can't you understand that she doesn't want to know about her father?! Can't you understand that she doesn't want anything to do with him?!" Lizzie yelled as she walked to Cinder's side, putting a comforting arm around her shoulder. Cinder quickly shrugged it off.
"Sorry, I just, I guess if I was in her situation, I'd wanna find him," Jeff said as he walked out.
"You okay, Cin?" Lizzie asked.
"Yeah, I'm fine," Cinder replied harshly.
*******************
"I'll see you at home C," Adam called he walked out of the art class room once the bell rung. She waved to him as she tried to gather her stuff.
"Cinder, may I speak with you?" Mrs. Curt, the senior art teacher asked.
"Sure Mrs. Curt," Cinder smiled as she shouldered her bag. "Is there something wrong?"
"Oh no. Not at all. You are one of my best students. If you weren't, I wouldn't have insisted you transfer to my class," she laughed. "No, my junior class has a bright and talented student. And he drew a picture of you for his project."
"Yeah, he wouldn't let me see that," Cinder laughed.
"Yes, I know. He asked me to show it to you. And I have some questions about it," she said as she pulled out the picture.
"Did he get a good grade on it?" Cinder asked.
"Oh yes. He got an A+ on it," she smiled. Cinder smiled happily as she looked over the pencil drawing. It was of her from the shoulders up, her hair down and flowing, looking out a window. She cocked her head to the side in thought as she looked up at her teacher. "It's beautiful."
"Yes it is, but I don't totally understand it. I was hoping you could help me."
"Um, I can try."
"Well, I know that you are good friends with Jeff. And that's why he drew you. But I just don't really understand the whole drawing. What's your take on it? He went far beyond what the project was. He seemed to have told some sort of story in the drawing," Mrs. Curt said as Cinder examined the picture carefully. She seemed to be leaning on a window sill with tears streaming down her face. Jeff's arm was around her in a friendly way, almost like he was rubbing her arm comfortingly. And out the window was a man carrying bags as he walked down the road away from the house.
"Oh my," Cinder choked out.
"What's the matter?"
"I think that's my father," Cinder replied as she looked up at her teacher.
"Why would he draw your father leaving the house? Does he go away on business a lot?"
"He left me and my brother when he found out my mom was pregnant with me," Cinder said quietly.
"I see. And do you talk about it much?"
"Not at all. In fact I've only mentioned it once. Like the nite that I met Jeff," Cinder replied.
"Well, I was thinking about transferring him into this class. He's very talented," Mrs. Curt said as she put away the drawing.
"Yeah, I think he has study hall this period," Cinder said.
"Great. Well that's all I really wanted. Are you going to be alright hun? You don't look too well."
"I'm fine," Cinder answered wrapping her arms around herself.
"Well, bye Cinder. Good luck in your competition tomorrow."
"Thanks Mrs. Curt," Cinder smiled as she left the room.
"C! There you are! I've been looking for you," Lizzie yelled as she ran towards her cousin. Cinder smiled at her as she tried to push her thoughts away. "Have I told you lately how much I love bein here?"
"Um, yeah, this morning," Cinder laughed. "How was Euro history with Shannon?"
"It was great! He's such a dork!" Lizzie laughed as they walked down the hall. "Hey, is something wrong?"
"No, I just have to find Jeff and talk to him about some stuff," Cinder answered.
"Oh? What about?" Lizzie asked curiously as they stood outside the geometry room.
"Just about the picture he drew for his art class. Anyways, I'll see you later. Don't forget that I have cheering practice after school. You can either come watch or get a ride on the bus," Cinder said.
"I'll watch cause there's no way in hell I'm riding the bus!" Lizzie laughed as she headed off for her last period class. "See ya cuz!"
"Later!" Cinder waved as she found her seat next to Shane. Shane gave her a heart felt smile as the bell rang.
********************
"You should have seen the competition! It was horrible!" Cinder exclaimed as she, Trish, Amy, and Lizzie sat in her room Sunday nite.
"Yeah, we sucked so bad. Just be glad you weren't there to witness it guys," Trish laughed.
"So what's this mean?" Lizzie asked.
"Well, since we came in 10th out of 15, we didn't qualify for competitions in December," Cinder answered with a sigh as she pulled on a pair of lounge pants.
"Cinder, Jeff's here!" Adam yelled up the stairs.
"Did you ever talk to him about his drawing?" Lizzie asked as Cinder headed out the door.
"That's what I'm doin now," Cinder smiled.
"Hey, what's up?" Jeff asked as Cinder met him on the stairs.
"What was up with the picture you drew?" Cinder asked as they sat on the stairs.
"What do you mean?" Jeff asked nervously.
"Well, you drew me with tears in my eyes and a man walking away. What was that all about?"
"Well, when I was drawing you and my Dad was in the room interacting with Matt, I saw this envious look in your eyes. You wish you had your Dad," Jeff said.
"How could you know that?"
"It was just the look you had. And I thought that would be a good thing to draw. I hope that's okay."
"Yeah, it was a good picture, but I don't cry. I never have, never will," Cinder said rather harshly as she stood up and walked up to her room.
"So?" Amy asked.
"Nevermind," Cinder said shaking her head as she sat on her bed.
"Hey, you girls wanna come down and watch a movie with us? Some of the guys are on their way over," Adam said as he walked into Cinder's room unannounced.
"Like who?" Amy asked.
"Well, your boyfriend is already here, Jeff, Shannon, Shane, and Jay. And my Alanah will be coming too," Adam answered with a smile.
"Um, yeah, we'll be down in a bit," Cinder replied.
"Your mom is gonna let us watch movies this late with all these people?" Lizzie asked.
"Yeah, well, she's got a date I guess," Cinder shrugged as the group of girls walked down to the living room. Cinder had just sat on the couch when the doorbell rang.
"I'll get it!" both Jeff and Cinder called. They smiled at each other and walked to the door.
"DAD?!" Jeff exclaimed as he opened the door.
"Mr. Hardy?!" Cinder exclaimed just as shocked as Jeff was.
"What are you doing here?" Jeff asked.
"Well, hello Gilbert," Leeann smiled as she walked passed Jeff and Cinder. "Don't wait up!" Jeff and Cinder's mouths dropped to the floor as they watched their parent walk off hand in hand.
"Was that mom's date?" Adam asked as he carried a bowl of popcorn into the living room.
"Yeah," Cinder managed to say through her shock.
"Matt, did you know that Dad had a date tonite?" Jeff asked as he and Cinder walked back into the living room slowly.
"Yeah, I kinda figured that's why he was gettin all dressed up," Matt answered. "Why the look?"
"My mom is dating your dad," Cinder answered.
"Are you serious?!" Adam and Matt exclaimed.
"Um, yeah," Jeff and Cinder replied in unison.
"Well, just think, we could all become one big happy family!" Lizzie laughed. Cinder shot her a death glare before sitting down next to Adam.
Eventually the other's showed up and they had a great nite. They barely watched any movies. Instead they made it into a dance party that never seemed to end. Lizzie and Cinder entertained them by trying to sing their version of Garth Brook's "I've got Friends in low places". Needless to say, they thought it was a joke. Shannon and Lizzie had cuddled up most of the nite while there seemed to be some sort of spark between Jeff and Trish. Shane had stayed to himself much of the time, glancing over at Cinder every once in awhile.
"Oh my God, I'm so tired. I'm goin to bed, ya'll," Cinder announced as she stood from her seat on the floor. "I just can't stay up any longer."
"What time is it?" Jay asked in mid laugh.
"Midnite," Cinder answered before yawning.
"C, it's so early still," Lizzie said while laughing at one of Shannon's lame jokes.
"Yeah, but I need some sleep if I'm gonna go to school tomorrow," Cinder smiled as she headed up the stairs. She curled into her bed and shortly fell asleep, trying to ignore the ruckus going on in her living room.
*********************
'Turn me on turn me on Mr. Deadman
Yeah I want it
I need it
To make a million
Yeah I love it
A fuckin' rockstar'
Cinder groaned as her radio alarm went off, signaling that morning had come. She tried to stretch but felt a body holding her tightly. She breathed in deeply, almost in panic, smelling a familiar smell, but she couldn't place who it was. She kept her eyes shut, almost scared to open them to find out who it was. Finally she got up the nerve and opened them. Shane's green hair was the first thing she saw. She had only had 3 guys sleep in her bed, Adam, Jay, and Shannon. This was a different experience and she knew that there was more to this than what had been with Shannon sleeping with her. She frowned as his brown eyes slowly began to open.
"Morning," he smiled.
"Yeah, um, morning. Can I ask why you're in my bed?" she asked.
"I um, well, there really wasn't any room down in the living room cause everyone crashed here, so I thought it'd be alright if I slept in here with you. Are you upset?" he asked as they sat up.
"No, I just didn't expect you to be in my bed. Why not stay in Adam's room?" she asked.
"Alanah," he smiled.
"Ah, well, what about my mom's room. I'm sure she never came back," Cinder laughed.
"Um, I think Amy and Matt were in there. So Trish and Jeff took the floor of the living room, Jay is on the couch, and Lizzie and Shannon in her room. So, I was kinda the odd man."
"Yes, Shane, you are an odd man, but that's besides the point," Cinder joked. "Why did you sleep in my bed? Why not on the floor?"
"Oh wow, look at the time. I gotta get home so I can be on time for school," he smiled as he rushed towards the door.
"Shane!" Cinder yelled.
"Later C!" he said as he shut the door behind him. Cinder sat on her bed staring at the door for quite sometime.
'So what if I lost everything
Would you want me if I was a failure
So what if I lost everything
Would you be there even when I am gone'
She turned to her alarm and hit hard, causing it to fall off her nitestand. Since it looked to be a cold day out, she pulled on a pair of faded blue jeans that had colored patches over the holes in the jeans and a ripped up long sleeve black shirt that she placed over a bright pink tank top. She pulled on her sneakers, pulled on a bandana to hold her hair, and skipped down the stairs, ready for the day. She smiled at the group that sat in the kitchen, drinking strong cups of steaming coffee.
"Morning," she chirped brightly as she grabbed a glass and some orange juice.
"Why are you so, chipper?" Jay asked sounding as though he'd be unable to tell anyone his name.
"Cause unlike you dorks, I went to bed," she smiled as Lizzie dragged herself down the stairs.
"Don't smile at me," she growled at Cinder causing her to laugh.
"Oh cheer up. I hear you had a certain blonde in your bed last nite," Cinder said.
"Mmmhmmm," Lizzie smiled. "I'll tell ya about it later." Cinder nodded as she moved into the living room.
"Hey, where's Shane?" Matt questioned.
"Yeah, Cinder. He did stay in your room last nite," Jay smirked.
"Nothing happened. I slept, he slept, we both slept. He went home," she replied.
"Where'd he sleep?" Amy asked curiously as she sat on the couch next to Cinder.
"With me.............in my bed," Cinder whispered.
"ARE YOU SERIOUS?!" Amy exclaimed.
"Shhh. I don't want Adam to know," Cinder replied.
"Sorry, but you slept together?!" Amy whispered.
"Yeah, I woke up to him holding me," Cinder replied a slight smile creeping on her face although she tried to hide it.
"Are you two gonna hook up?" Trish piped in as ate a spoonful of cereal.
"No, we're just friends. It just happened like that. It's no big deal," Cinder shrugged. "But what was goin on between you and Jeff last nite?"
"Yeah, I'm kinda curious about that too," Lizzie smiled as she sat on the other side of Cinder.
"I don't know. He's sweet. I mean true, he's not really my type, but there's just this attraction to him that I feel," Trish smiled dreamily.
"Awe," the others cried before bursting out in laughter.
"What about you and the Moore-On Lizzie?" Amy asked.
"Oh my God. I like him so much. He's so cute. Yeah, he's a dork, but he's a cute dork. And I think we might just go out on Friday," she answered with almost a giddy smile.
"Wow, you all have someone, and for once I'm alone," Cinder said as her smile faded.
"C, you so didn't need Charlie. He was an asshole," Amy said.
"Yeah, but I still loved him," Cinder sighed.
"Hey, can borrow some clothes from you two so we don't have to go back home?" Trish asked. Lizzie and Cinder nodded at them and led them upstairs.
"I love those jeans, Cin. Where'd you get em?" Lizzie asked.
"I made em," Cinder smiled. "You know how I've always been. I always made my own clothes."
"And you always got yelled at for it too!" Lizzie laughed.
"Yeah, but my Mom has finally come to accept it," Cinder laughed as she walked into her room. She stopped short, seeing Jeff standing next to her dresser, looking at pictures. "What are you doin in here?"
"Oh, I um, I was wondering if you had those clothes that I let you borrow when you were at my house," he smiled.
"Oh yeah, they're even clean," Cinder laughed.
"Is this you and Adam?" he asked holding out a picture to her. Adam's hair was much shorter than it was now and she wasn't as girly as she was now. She guessed they were about 9.
"Yeah, that's us," she said.
"You two almost look like twins," he laughed.
"Oh, yeah, I know. People always thought we were the cutest things cause we looked so much. We were always mistaken for twins. It was really good, cause we always got so much attention, but it was so annoying cause people always wanted to see us together and smile. It was so bad," she replied.
"You and Lizzie look a lot alike. Sister like actually," he said.
"We were so close growing up. She'd often spend vactions or summer with us cause her parents travel. It was always great to have her around. Adam hated it, cause he was always the only boy around. We used to get mistaken for sisters and we loved it," she said.
"I um, I wanted to ask you about your dad," Jeff said nervously.
"Mmy Dad? Why?" she asked.
"Why'd he walk out?" Jeff asked.
"I don't know. He just did," Cinder answered as if she'd rather have not talked about it.
"Have you ever tried to find him?"
"No. Never," she said harshly.
"Why? Don't you wanna know why he left? Or if you look like him?" he asked.
"Adam and I obviously do! We didn't get this blonde wavy hair and blue eyes from our mother!" she exclaimed.
"But don't you wanna know for sure?"
"Jeff, just shut up!" Lizzie exclaimed as she walked into Cinder's room.
"Huh?" Jeff asked.
"Can't you understand that she doesn't want to know about her father?! Can't you understand that she doesn't want anything to do with him?!" Lizzie yelled as she walked to Cinder's side, putting a comforting arm around her shoulder. Cinder quickly shrugged it off.
"Sorry, I just, I guess if I was in her situation, I'd wanna find him," Jeff said as he walked out.
"You okay, Cin?" Lizzie asked.
"Yeah, I'm fine," Cinder replied harshly.