Chapter two
Andrew wasn't gay, and he had the Playboys to prove it. Okay, technically he'd swiped them from Tucker's room, but they were under Andrew's mattress now, so that kind of made them Andrew's. And even if he hadn't slept in that room for two weeks and therefore hadn't looked at them in a while, Andrew still had Playboys under his mattress, so he wasn't gay. Besides, he hadn't been in his room because Warren had suggested that he and Jonathan move into the basement with him, and what did that say about Warren?
Andrew was not gay. He knew he wasn't gay because he'd kissed girls - well, one girl, outside church after Sunday School one time, and even if she'd punched him in the arm and ran off afterwards, he'd still been the one to kiss her. He wasn't gay.
Which meant that he probably shouldn't be as worried about all this as he was. Warren had said that worrying about being gay meant you probably were gay. So even though he was certain he liked girls, Andrew suspected there might still be something wrong with him.
He guessed it might have something to do with Warren. Specifically, Warren's hand on his leg. Because although he knew it was wrong and he knew he wasn't gay, Warren's hand, stroking and squeezing his thigh, had...done things. Made something in his belly go 'squish', and his heart speed up and his skin feel prickly and warm, so that he was almost disappointed when Jonathan had made him stop. Almost. There had been nothing nice about the look on Warren's face or the hiss of his voice, but the rubbing on his leg was not something Andrew could forget. No matter how much he tried.
It also raised the issue of why Warren had touched him in the first place, giving Andrew two reasons to wonder if maybe Warren was the one with something to hide.
Andrew, however, was not gay. He knew the Slayer was hot, and that her quiet blonde friend was very pretty, and the red-haired friend was kind of cute too. He watched Warren's grainy imported European films and got excited at the right times. He had happy thoughts about Jeri Ryan. He liked girls. He wasn't gay.
He just couldn't say that the thought of Warren's hand on his leg wasn't at least a little exciting.
It was a conundrum, alright, and he definitely didn't like the thought of not knowing something. Especially when Warren seemed to know and could make fun of him for not knowing.
He spent an instructive couple of hours on the 'net while Warren and Jonathan were out. For control purposes, he'd perused the porn sites in the history on Warren's computer to check his reaction. Everything in order there. Then, after pacing the lair and thinking unsexy thoughts to return to a neutral state, he'd braced himself, took a deep breath, and typed 'gay porn' into a search engine.
He hadn't expected there to be so much. Not knowing where to start, he simply clicked a link at random and waited for self-awareness.
Pictures of naked men leering at the camera and holding enormous erections only made him feel embarrassed and a little, well, inadequate. Andrew half hoped those images had been manipulated somehow, if only for the sake of the poor boyfriends waiting at home for the men in the photos. Some of the pictures just made him giggle out loud, and then he had to double check that he really was alone, in case anyone had heard.
There were pictures of men with other men, sometimes three, four, five at a time, and those interested Andrew, sparked his curiosity. Which was okay, he decided, because curiosity was good. Well, not so much in the cat-killing sense, but curiosity led also to discovery, and not just the discovery of dead cats. Soon he found himself wondering, purely out of innocent curiosity of course, what it might feel like to be touched like *that* or have someone's tongue just *there*, and whether it made a difference if it was a man or a woman doing the touching.
The major discovery of the afternoon was that while naked men were either scary or boring, there was something about the thought of naked men together that made him feel pleasantly squiggly inside. His only worry was that it wasn't any different to the way regular porn made him feel, and he wondered if perhaps it was just porn in general that did that.
He found other things besides pictures, and spent some time reading various articles and stories, which turned out to be more informative even than the pictures. There, he learned words like 'frottage' and 'rimming', and what it might feel like to have some guy's 'tumescent cock graze the soft, sensitive skin of his backside'. He wasn't sure what 'tumescent' meant, and couldn't say he relished the thought of anyone's cock near his backside, but the rest of it made him feel as squelchy inside as some of the pictures had done.
Somewhere among the articles he discovered the word 'bi-curious'. It seemed to fit. Because again, curious was good, right? Perfectly healthy. And definitely not gay.
He wondered if maybe Warren was bi-curious too, and if that was why he'd touched Andrew's leg. Since he already had reason to suspect that Warren wasn't so straight either, it kind of made sense. Obviously, Warren had had the same kind of confusion as Andrew, and after identifying him as a fellow bi-whatever, he'd decided to try it out, only being Warren he naturally had enough confidence to go straight to the source instead of sneaking furtive glances at gay porn in an empty room.
After deleting the sites he'd visited from the history on Warren's PC, he wondered if maybe he should thank Warren for helping him figure it out.
~~~~~
tbc
Andrew wasn't gay, and he had the Playboys to prove it. Okay, technically he'd swiped them from Tucker's room, but they were under Andrew's mattress now, so that kind of made them Andrew's. And even if he hadn't slept in that room for two weeks and therefore hadn't looked at them in a while, Andrew still had Playboys under his mattress, so he wasn't gay. Besides, he hadn't been in his room because Warren had suggested that he and Jonathan move into the basement with him, and what did that say about Warren?
Andrew was not gay. He knew he wasn't gay because he'd kissed girls - well, one girl, outside church after Sunday School one time, and even if she'd punched him in the arm and ran off afterwards, he'd still been the one to kiss her. He wasn't gay.
Which meant that he probably shouldn't be as worried about all this as he was. Warren had said that worrying about being gay meant you probably were gay. So even though he was certain he liked girls, Andrew suspected there might still be something wrong with him.
He guessed it might have something to do with Warren. Specifically, Warren's hand on his leg. Because although he knew it was wrong and he knew he wasn't gay, Warren's hand, stroking and squeezing his thigh, had...done things. Made something in his belly go 'squish', and his heart speed up and his skin feel prickly and warm, so that he was almost disappointed when Jonathan had made him stop. Almost. There had been nothing nice about the look on Warren's face or the hiss of his voice, but the rubbing on his leg was not something Andrew could forget. No matter how much he tried.
It also raised the issue of why Warren had touched him in the first place, giving Andrew two reasons to wonder if maybe Warren was the one with something to hide.
Andrew, however, was not gay. He knew the Slayer was hot, and that her quiet blonde friend was very pretty, and the red-haired friend was kind of cute too. He watched Warren's grainy imported European films and got excited at the right times. He had happy thoughts about Jeri Ryan. He liked girls. He wasn't gay.
He just couldn't say that the thought of Warren's hand on his leg wasn't at least a little exciting.
It was a conundrum, alright, and he definitely didn't like the thought of not knowing something. Especially when Warren seemed to know and could make fun of him for not knowing.
He spent an instructive couple of hours on the 'net while Warren and Jonathan were out. For control purposes, he'd perused the porn sites in the history on Warren's computer to check his reaction. Everything in order there. Then, after pacing the lair and thinking unsexy thoughts to return to a neutral state, he'd braced himself, took a deep breath, and typed 'gay porn' into a search engine.
He hadn't expected there to be so much. Not knowing where to start, he simply clicked a link at random and waited for self-awareness.
Pictures of naked men leering at the camera and holding enormous erections only made him feel embarrassed and a little, well, inadequate. Andrew half hoped those images had been manipulated somehow, if only for the sake of the poor boyfriends waiting at home for the men in the photos. Some of the pictures just made him giggle out loud, and then he had to double check that he really was alone, in case anyone had heard.
There were pictures of men with other men, sometimes three, four, five at a time, and those interested Andrew, sparked his curiosity. Which was okay, he decided, because curiosity was good. Well, not so much in the cat-killing sense, but curiosity led also to discovery, and not just the discovery of dead cats. Soon he found himself wondering, purely out of innocent curiosity of course, what it might feel like to be touched like *that* or have someone's tongue just *there*, and whether it made a difference if it was a man or a woman doing the touching.
The major discovery of the afternoon was that while naked men were either scary or boring, there was something about the thought of naked men together that made him feel pleasantly squiggly inside. His only worry was that it wasn't any different to the way regular porn made him feel, and he wondered if perhaps it was just porn in general that did that.
He found other things besides pictures, and spent some time reading various articles and stories, which turned out to be more informative even than the pictures. There, he learned words like 'frottage' and 'rimming', and what it might feel like to have some guy's 'tumescent cock graze the soft, sensitive skin of his backside'. He wasn't sure what 'tumescent' meant, and couldn't say he relished the thought of anyone's cock near his backside, but the rest of it made him feel as squelchy inside as some of the pictures had done.
Somewhere among the articles he discovered the word 'bi-curious'. It seemed to fit. Because again, curious was good, right? Perfectly healthy. And definitely not gay.
He wondered if maybe Warren was bi-curious too, and if that was why he'd touched Andrew's leg. Since he already had reason to suspect that Warren wasn't so straight either, it kind of made sense. Obviously, Warren had had the same kind of confusion as Andrew, and after identifying him as a fellow bi-whatever, he'd decided to try it out, only being Warren he naturally had enough confidence to go straight to the source instead of sneaking furtive glances at gay porn in an empty room.
After deleting the sites he'd visited from the history on Warren's PC, he wondered if maybe he should thank Warren for helping him figure it out.
~~~~~
tbc