Challenge

by Anansay

August 27. 2003

He watched her walking away from him... again. Too late... what did that mean? He sighed, shut off the light and headed toward the door. There was nothing more he could do right now. There wasn't going to be any diner, he'd told her no. He shook his head, Now why did I do that? He asked himself. There was no answer. It had just come out. A safety response. Stay away... Don't get close... Keep the guard up. Yeah, that was it. Wasn't it? He didn't know.
He walked by the lab and saw the destruction: the shards of glass that hadn't been picked up completely, the panes of windows like gaping holes in the walls. And everything gone. All their work gone in a matter of seconds.
He stood on the spot, eyes glued to the area of destruction as though seeing it in a new light. In just a split second, the lab was gone, Greg was blown away and the evidence nullified even if it did survive the blast. And Sara was hurt. As he looked around at what remained he saw how so many times the same thing could have happened at any time, and with possibly deadlier results.
When you figure it out, it just might be too late, she'd said before leaving. Too late... His body shivered with the thought.
Too late... she might be with someone else.
Too late... she might be gone.
Too late... she might be... dead.
He sighed again and heaving the briefcase in his hand he turned and continued on his way. He couldn't deny it any longer... Sara meant more to him than he cared to admit. Honey... it had slipped out before he realized it. He'd called her honey...! He pushed the door to the outside open and stepped into the bright sunlight. He squinted and looked up. The sun still rose and shone. Her car was gone. She was gone. Just like that. She'd asked him and then left. Just like that. He furrowed his brow and shook his head. No pining for her, she was too strong for that. He smiled, that's what he liked about her. She always bounced back much stronger from adversity.
Sitting in his car, there was this odd sense of having been tossed into another dimension. Everything looked the same, but... it felt different. There was no way to really explain it; it was something he believed only he could sense. Sara had asked him out, and he'd said No. He hung his head and closed his eyes and her face appeared in his head. Her deep brown eyes looking up at him, pleading for him to just see, just feel what he felt. And yet, mingled with that pleading was this quiet strength. He saw her standing on her own two feet and peering over the precipice that was them. Her words never pled. Her stance was strong. And she didn't take his rejection to heart, only challenged him to qualify it. He saw her again, his strong, independent beautiful Sara. And he sighed.
It was end of shift and he'd yet to see Greg in the hospital. No matter how much Greg irritated Grissom, there was something about the spunk and singular mannerisms that drew Grissom to him. The more he knew about Greg, the more his respect grew in increments. There was a lot more to that kid than Grissom had at first guessed. His contribution to the lab was immeasurable. He needed to see him.

~*~

He walked down the long, staid corridor of the hospital wincing at the familiar antiseptic smell. There was no denying in his mind the images that came when the smell hit him. Hospitals had never held much promise for him and being in one was something he only did when the need was absolutely undeniable.
His breath caught in his throat when he saw the familiar brown hair. Sara was sitting on a chair beside the bed. Greg was awake; they were talking. Sara was leaning over, resting her forearms on her legs. Greg's head was resting on his hand as he listened to her. Then his hand reached out and patted Sara's hair. Grissom watched this with growing confusion. Since when were Greg and Sara close? Sara's hand took his and brought it down to the bed and held it there for a moment before releasing it.
Grissom sighed and was about to turn away when Greg's voice called out to him. "Grissom?!"
Grissom turned back saw that Greg was looking at him - and so was Sara - and smiled, coming into the room. "Hey Greg... Sara. Just thought I'd come by. Make sure you were okay."
Greg smiled weakly. "Well... I'm alive. You get silence in the lab until I return. And I will return!"
Grissom smiled too, but it was a small one. He saw Sara looking at him, but his eyes wouldn't go to hers. Greg was still looking at him. "Well, that's good. The lab needs you, Greg."
"Oh, the lab does?"
Grissom sighed. "Yes, Greg. The lab does." Oh god, here we go again!
Sara stood up then and looked back down at Greg. "Well... I'm off. Catch ya later, Greg! Grissom," she said nodding in his direction.
Grissom watcher her leave with a rising sense of panic. He looked back down at Greg who merely lifted an eyebrow and waited. Grissom fought the urge to turn around just to watch Sara leave, to see her just a bit longer. He sighed and sat down on the chair by Greg's bed, sitting back and crossing his legs and resting his hands on his lap. His eyes scanned the room and his hands fidgeted.
Greg had always been a lab rat' to Grissom, someone who performed a service that in turn allowed Grissom to do his work. As much as Greg's eccentric ideas wore thin at time with Grissom, he was ultimately impressed with Greg's enthusiasm and pure joy in doing his work. It was truly a marvel to find someone who enjoyed running DNA samples all day – or night – long.
Being head of night shift meant that all of the people who worked for Grissom were ultimately his responsibility. A member of his team had been injured and it was his duty as boss to ensure that his team remained whole and unharmed. So he found himself sitting by Greg's hospital bedside with nothing to say. There were no DNA samples for Greg to give to him, and the drugs had dulled Greg's perpetual comic mind to a flat monotone of grunts and monosyllabic answers.
Greg was lying on his side to allow his wounded side to heal properly. His head rested on his hand and his eyes were half closed though he struggled to keep them open and focused. He barely moved. An unmoving Greg was something that just seemed very out of place. The young man had always seemed like an unending ball of energy, flying to and fro in his lab from one machine to another on his wheeled chair. This Greg that stared back at Grissom was a poor caricature of his former manic self.
It hit Grissom was a force that caused him to look closely at Greg, probably for the first time since knowing him, and something shifted in him, a perspective that had remained hidden in the shadows until now.
"How're you making out?" Grissom asked.
"As good as could be expected, I guess," Greg said, his voice as weak as he looked.
Grissom nodded. What could he say? There was nothing he could say to make Greg feel better, to heal faster, to take away the pain. "The doctor said that, uh, you'd be released in a few days. You'll back in your lab sooner than you know."
Greg tried to grin, but it looked more like a grimace of pain. "Yeah, my lab." His eyes closed and for a moment Grissom thought he'd fallen asleep. He was just about to get up when Greg's eyes opened again. "How's Sara doing?"
The mention of Sara's name brought back the same feelings as before. Her face appeared in his head as she'd looked standing in his doorway, eyes openly expectant, challenging and fearful at the same time. it really could be too late. "Uh, she's good. A few stitches in her hands and she's back to her same old self." Grissom had tried for an air of nonchalance, but he suspected that even in Greg's diminished mental capacity, he'd heard the feeling of remorse of Grissom's voice.
"Good," said Greg. "I was worried about her. They told me she was standing right outside and got the brunt of the glass."
"Her hand. It got cut. Like I said, a few stitches and she's back to her normal self."
Greg eyes suddenly became an intense darkness that bore into Grissom's own and caught him. There were questions in Greg's eyes, and accusations. Grissom struggled for a moment with Greg's silent supplication before pulling his eyes away and staring down at his own hands.
"I have to go, Greg. I, uh, have to get back to work."
"It's always work isn't it?"
Grissom's head spun back around and he glared at the young man. "What?"
Greg's head turned a bit as he tried to better catch the older man's eye. "Work, you always hide in it."
"Greg, what are you talking about?"
Greg's eyelids slid over his eyes and his head moved in a shrug. "I don't know, must be the drugs talking" His words were slurred but Grissom had the faint impression the drugs weren't that strong. He squinted at Greg who appeared to have fallen asleep before turning around and leaving.
When he got into the hallway, he saw a tall brunette heading toward the elevator. "Sara?"
She turned around and faced him, a surprised look on her face as though she'd been caught doing something she wasn't supposed to do. "Uh, hey!" she said, the words sounding feeble even to Grissom's ears.
"Were you here all this time?" Grissom asked as he fell into step with her and waited for the elevator.
"Uh, yeah, I was considering getting Greg something from the gift shop downstairs but I don't think they have anything flashy enough that he'd like."
Grissom grinned. "Yeah, I highly doubt that too."
"So, did you have a nice talk with Greg?"
He turned to look at her. "Yes. I did. Why?"
"Nothing. It's good that you came. He looks up to you, you know."
Grissom sighed. "So I've heard," he mumbled.
"Well, it's true. Accept it."
"Grudgingly."
The elevator dinged and the doors opened. Grissom and Sara both stepped forward at the same time and bumped shoulders. "Uh, you first."
"Why, cause I'm a lady?" Sara asked, stepping back from the door.
Grissom sighed, shook his head and stepped into the elevator first. "Even being nice is considered sexist these days."
Sara smirked and joined him. The doors closed, sealing them in the moving box as it brought them to the first floor. They stood in their separate corners like scolded children, their eyes not meeting. The air felt like a catacomb, silent and oppressive, as though the slightest noise might bring to light that which ought to remain suppressed. Grissom glanced up at the shifting numbers. Sara stared hard at the door, her hands gripping each other tightly. In time, a long time it seemed to both of them, the door dinged again and slid open to reveal the busy hallway and the doors to the outside. This time Sara stepped out first, her long legs carrying her quickly away from the claustrophobic box. Grissom hurried up to her and grabbed her arm. Sara spun around and stared at him, her eyes going from her arm to his.
"Sara... can we talk?"
Her eyebrow rose and her head tilted to the side. "About what?"
"Uh us?"
"Us?"
Grissom sighed. "Listen, I know I... about that dinner..."
Her lips pulled up but it was only a muscle movement. Her face remained placid. "Grissom, I'm tired. I'm going home to sleep. It's been a long day." And she turned around, pulling her arm from his grasp, and was gone by the time Grissom realized what had just transpired. He'd brought up her offer and she had rejected it. He closed his mouth and began walking after her, though staying his distance. Their cars were in the same parking garage, but he let her have her space. His mind wandered back to the scene he'd witnessed in Greg's room. He wondered at the essence of the conversation between Greg and Sara. She'd seemed quite relaxed with him, leaning over as though she were talking about something important to her. What had been exchanged? Was she talking about him? No.
No, that's what he'd said. He'd said No. To Sara. He sighed again and spotted his car.
In his car, he once again hung his head in confusion. She had broached the subject with absolute eloquence, never faltering in her voice or her stare. And he had pushed her away... again.

~*~

The group was in the breakroom. Grissom was standing and handing out the assignments. Catherine was paired with Warwick and Nick while Grissom chose to have Sara work with him. She glanced up once, questions in her eyes, but had said nothing.
When they were in the car, Grissom turned to Sara. She was staring out the window, a small smile on her lips as though there was nothing to worry about at all. He frowned and turned from her. He'd been a fool. He had rejected the one person he so desperately wanted in his life.
With slow methodical movements, he started the car and pulled out. There as no more denying it, he was smitten. And he had waited too long.

~*~

Copyright © 2003 Anansay