A/N: Yay!!! I got a few reviews for the last chapter!!
Disclaimer: I don't own anything to do with Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings.......if I did, I don't think I'd be posting my story here!
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Chapter 3: Return of the Ferret
"I wish we had a holiday soon." Ron complained as he and Hermione made their way down the stairs of the castle and onto the grounds.
"Ron! Today's the first day of school! We haven't even started lessons yet!" Hermione snapped exasperatedly at him.
Behind them about 50 yards, Harry and Sam walked down the steps of Hogwarts. He had rescued her from having to visit Professor Trelawnly with Parvati and Lavender to see what classes she was 'destined' to go to today. Fortunately, Harry had pointed out that Sammy already *had* a schedule and it was almost the same as his so he and Hermione would help her get her where she needed to go. Looking slightly put out, they handed her over, and proceeded to Divination. [A/N: Lavender and Parvati both have Divination twice as much as Harry, Ron, and Hermione, becuz they're obsessed with Trelawney...and no, I don't care that it doesn't make sense (not a lot of things in this story do =P)]
"So where are we going again?" she asked curiously noting that they were heading towards a hut in front a deep forest.
"Care of Magical Creatures," Harry responded happily as they walked towards his favourite class.
"Right ... and then," she glanced down at her timetable, "and then Charms is next ... right?."
"Yeah."
Harry and Hermione had talked more about finding out Samantha's past that morning after Parvati and Lavender had left. Harry had decided to try to ask her this time, while Hermione distracted Ron. That wouldn't be to hard on her part. All she had to do was explain what happened at breakfast.
"Green eggs and what?!?!" Ron exclaimed after hearing about the incident that mourning.
"Spam." Hermione said simply. *This isn't that hard ... just as long as he doesn't turn around and see Harry walking with Sam...*
"So let me get this strait ... A cat in a hat appeared out of no where with some 'green eggs and spam', sang a song about them, trying to get people to try them, and then after realizing that nobody wanted them, left screaming a threat that Dr. Zeus or whatever is going to get his revenge."
"Dr. Suess," Hermione corrected, "and yes that's about right. But the song was quite funny! You should've been there to hear it!"
"Right ... so who exactly IS this Dr. Suess guy anyway?"
"He's a muggle writer of little kids books. 'Green Eggs and Ham' and 'Cat in the Hat' are two of them."
"I still don't get it." Ron and Hermione approached Hagrid hut with Hermione trying her best to get Ron to understand, not only because she felt the need to, but to bid Harry some time...
"So, uh, you never ended up telling us why Ron supposedly 'hates' you." Harry said hoping he'll find out without any interruptions. They were now very close to the forest, and nearing where the Gryffindors and Slytherins usually waited for Hagrid. *I hope this doesn't take too long, only God knows what Ron's going to do when he sees me with Sam.*
"Well you see," she said as she scratched her nose, "when we were-what was that?!" She turned and looked frightfully at the forest at the forest with her bright, big, light green eyes. "There's something there!"
The closer groups of Gryffindors and Slytherins looked at Samantha in an odd way, as if she had said "The lepricon told me to burn things." [A/N: LOL!!! I got that from the Simpsons by the way!! (Ralph said it!)] But then Blaise Zambini of Slytherin suddenly exclaimed "Something IS in there!! I saw shadow move!!"
This caused a chain reaction with the others who were there.
"OH MY GOD, WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!!" Seamus yelled insanely.
"For God sake, Seamus, stop over reacting!" Hermione said sternly.
"Do you think it eats meat?!?!" Parvati asked in a strangely high tone.
"Oh of coarse it does! Why else would it be so close to the edge of the forest!!" Lavender responded in a shaky voice.
"Before we all die, does anyone want me to kiss them as a last wish?" Dean asked sheepishly, but quite loudly, making sure he was heard.
"Who'd want to kiss YOU, Thomas?!?!" Pansy Parkinson inquired.
"Shut up! Everyone just shut up!! Neville pleaded, "It'll here us!!"
"F-Finnigan already blew our chances there. It's-it's probably just Hagrid." Malfoy stuttered. Everyone who turned to look at him were shocked to see he had went white with fear.
"Don't kid yourself Malfoy, Hagrid's bigger than that," Ron said, obviously trying to hide a note of fear himself, but had failed largely.
Hermione decided this would be a good time to step in. "Everybody just calm down!!," sounding oddly like Percy, "I highly doubt that anything is going to happen, it's probably just a Thestral or something harmless like that!" She looked around at her classmates, turning her back to the forest, "Do you really think th-AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" As Hermione had continued her speech, something had crawled out of the forest and grabbed her ankle.
"M-my P-Preciousssssssssss!!" the green, mini troll looking creature croaked. "Where's my Precioussssssssss?"
She ran to the nearest person and clutched the front of their black robes. Hermione felt shaky arms wrap around her in a comforting way.
The creature had gotten up and stumbled around repeating the same things over and over. He seemingly tripped over a rock and landed on Pansy, knocking both of them onto the ground.
"My Precioussssssss!!! Do you have my Precioussssssss?!?!?!" he asked, in the same crackly voice.
Pansy didn't know who or what that creature was, but deciding that he wasn't friendly, she suddenly kicked him off of her, got up quickly and ran to the castle with arms flailing. As she ran, she was heard screaming at the top of her lungs in her screechy voice, "ATTEMPTED RAPE!! ATTEMPTED RAPE!! A DE-FORMED TROLL TRIED TO RAPE ME!!! HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLPPPPP MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!"
Students still on the grounds before their classes looked up at the distressed girl. Some of them, recognizing Pansy, rolled their eyes and went back to their conversations. Others looked around fearfully, trying to catch a glimpse of the mysterious creature.
Back where the Care of Magical Creatures stood still waiting for their teacher to come, the muggle-borns started to crack up at the sight of Pansy's outburst. A few of the others, (Gryffindors specifically), were starting t regain their wits. Harry, Ron, and Seamus started to try to curse it, but everything they tried didn't effect it.
Meanwhile, Hermione was quickly regaining her composure. Reputedly letting go of her protectors robes, she looked up gratefully to see who they were, only to be shocked by finding a very disturbed looking Malfoy, who was currently gazing at the creature who had attacked her. "N-nothings working..." she heard him mutter. She turned her head so that she could get a good look of her attacker and burst out laughing with the other few who were laughing.
"T-That's Gollum," she tried to say as she laughed, "he's from a book!" She started to laugh even more at the silliness of it all.
Gollum who was still on the ground, looked up at them all giving them a hurtful look as he unnoticedly was pelted with an assortment of spells. Harry spun around at the end of an incantation at Hermione's words and his spell narrowly missed her and hit Malfoy instead.
Everyone now forgot about Gollum and turned to where Malfoy was standing just an instant ago. All of them burst out laughing, Gryffindors and Slytherins alike, as they saw a white ferret bouncing up and down about 2 feet into the air, where Malfoy was last. No one saw Gollum walk back into the forest.
Ron was heard saying, "It's the Return of the Magnificent Bouncing Ferret!!" At this, everyone laughed even harder (if that was even possible.)
Hagrid chose this moment to return. "Sorry I'm late. C'mon I have a new creature for yeh' all. Hey, where's that Malfoy git?"
Instantly, their was a quick shuffle of almost all the students to hide Malfoy from Hagrid's view. Harry's mind raced as he thought of an explanation, but as he did, he heard Ron say, "Well err-the last time I saw him, he-uh, was really white." The others around started nodding vigorously, trying to suppress their laughs.
Hagrid caught a small sight of a white ferret that a appeared to be jumping up and down 2 feet into the air and suddenly understood. "Well, er- I guess one o' you Slytherins will have to fill him in on the lesson today," deciding to ignore what he saw and led them over to whatever new beast he had smuggled illegally onto the grounds.
Hermione walked over to Harry, "Well, what did you find out?" she asked in a hushed voice, not wanting to be overheard by neither Ron nor Samantha.
"Nothing, that ... what was it, Gollum, came out before she answered."
"Damn. I guess I'll try next time, I don't know where I could ask her without interruptions though..."
Harry thought of his classes when it hit him. "Transfiguration. There are never any distractions in McGanagal's class, she makes she of that."
"Good idea, we have her tomorrow afternoon, I'll ask her then..."
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A/N: Ok I know it's a lame chapter, but I like the next one better!!! If you have any suggestions for a parody I could do, let me know!! Now that you've read, why don't you review!! I don't mind flames, I could put some to use when I make my green eggs and spam tomorrow ... just please REVIEW!!
Disclaimer: I don't own anything to do with Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings.......if I did, I don't think I'd be posting my story here!
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Chapter 3: Return of the Ferret
"I wish we had a holiday soon." Ron complained as he and Hermione made their way down the stairs of the castle and onto the grounds.
"Ron! Today's the first day of school! We haven't even started lessons yet!" Hermione snapped exasperatedly at him.
Behind them about 50 yards, Harry and Sam walked down the steps of Hogwarts. He had rescued her from having to visit Professor Trelawnly with Parvati and Lavender to see what classes she was 'destined' to go to today. Fortunately, Harry had pointed out that Sammy already *had* a schedule and it was almost the same as his so he and Hermione would help her get her where she needed to go. Looking slightly put out, they handed her over, and proceeded to Divination. [A/N: Lavender and Parvati both have Divination twice as much as Harry, Ron, and Hermione, becuz they're obsessed with Trelawney...and no, I don't care that it doesn't make sense (not a lot of things in this story do =P)]
"So where are we going again?" she asked curiously noting that they were heading towards a hut in front a deep forest.
"Care of Magical Creatures," Harry responded happily as they walked towards his favourite class.
"Right ... and then," she glanced down at her timetable, "and then Charms is next ... right?."
"Yeah."
Harry and Hermione had talked more about finding out Samantha's past that morning after Parvati and Lavender had left. Harry had decided to try to ask her this time, while Hermione distracted Ron. That wouldn't be to hard on her part. All she had to do was explain what happened at breakfast.
"Green eggs and what?!?!" Ron exclaimed after hearing about the incident that mourning.
"Spam." Hermione said simply. *This isn't that hard ... just as long as he doesn't turn around and see Harry walking with Sam...*
"So let me get this strait ... A cat in a hat appeared out of no where with some 'green eggs and spam', sang a song about them, trying to get people to try them, and then after realizing that nobody wanted them, left screaming a threat that Dr. Zeus or whatever is going to get his revenge."
"Dr. Suess," Hermione corrected, "and yes that's about right. But the song was quite funny! You should've been there to hear it!"
"Right ... so who exactly IS this Dr. Suess guy anyway?"
"He's a muggle writer of little kids books. 'Green Eggs and Ham' and 'Cat in the Hat' are two of them."
"I still don't get it." Ron and Hermione approached Hagrid hut with Hermione trying her best to get Ron to understand, not only because she felt the need to, but to bid Harry some time...
"So, uh, you never ended up telling us why Ron supposedly 'hates' you." Harry said hoping he'll find out without any interruptions. They were now very close to the forest, and nearing where the Gryffindors and Slytherins usually waited for Hagrid. *I hope this doesn't take too long, only God knows what Ron's going to do when he sees me with Sam.*
"Well you see," she said as she scratched her nose, "when we were-what was that?!" She turned and looked frightfully at the forest at the forest with her bright, big, light green eyes. "There's something there!"
The closer groups of Gryffindors and Slytherins looked at Samantha in an odd way, as if she had said "The lepricon told me to burn things." [A/N: LOL!!! I got that from the Simpsons by the way!! (Ralph said it!)] But then Blaise Zambini of Slytherin suddenly exclaimed "Something IS in there!! I saw shadow move!!"
This caused a chain reaction with the others who were there.
"OH MY GOD, WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!!" Seamus yelled insanely.
"For God sake, Seamus, stop over reacting!" Hermione said sternly.
"Do you think it eats meat?!?!" Parvati asked in a strangely high tone.
"Oh of coarse it does! Why else would it be so close to the edge of the forest!!" Lavender responded in a shaky voice.
"Before we all die, does anyone want me to kiss them as a last wish?" Dean asked sheepishly, but quite loudly, making sure he was heard.
"Who'd want to kiss YOU, Thomas?!?!" Pansy Parkinson inquired.
"Shut up! Everyone just shut up!! Neville pleaded, "It'll here us!!"
"F-Finnigan already blew our chances there. It's-it's probably just Hagrid." Malfoy stuttered. Everyone who turned to look at him were shocked to see he had went white with fear.
"Don't kid yourself Malfoy, Hagrid's bigger than that," Ron said, obviously trying to hide a note of fear himself, but had failed largely.
Hermione decided this would be a good time to step in. "Everybody just calm down!!," sounding oddly like Percy, "I highly doubt that anything is going to happen, it's probably just a Thestral or something harmless like that!" She looked around at her classmates, turning her back to the forest, "Do you really think th-AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" As Hermione had continued her speech, something had crawled out of the forest and grabbed her ankle.
"M-my P-Preciousssssssssss!!" the green, mini troll looking creature croaked. "Where's my Precioussssssssss?"
She ran to the nearest person and clutched the front of their black robes. Hermione felt shaky arms wrap around her in a comforting way.
The creature had gotten up and stumbled around repeating the same things over and over. He seemingly tripped over a rock and landed on Pansy, knocking both of them onto the ground.
"My Precioussssssss!!! Do you have my Precioussssssss?!?!?!" he asked, in the same crackly voice.
Pansy didn't know who or what that creature was, but deciding that he wasn't friendly, she suddenly kicked him off of her, got up quickly and ran to the castle with arms flailing. As she ran, she was heard screaming at the top of her lungs in her screechy voice, "ATTEMPTED RAPE!! ATTEMPTED RAPE!! A DE-FORMED TROLL TRIED TO RAPE ME!!! HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLPPPPP MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!"
Students still on the grounds before their classes looked up at the distressed girl. Some of them, recognizing Pansy, rolled their eyes and went back to their conversations. Others looked around fearfully, trying to catch a glimpse of the mysterious creature.
Back where the Care of Magical Creatures stood still waiting for their teacher to come, the muggle-borns started to crack up at the sight of Pansy's outburst. A few of the others, (Gryffindors specifically), were starting t regain their wits. Harry, Ron, and Seamus started to try to curse it, but everything they tried didn't effect it.
Meanwhile, Hermione was quickly regaining her composure. Reputedly letting go of her protectors robes, she looked up gratefully to see who they were, only to be shocked by finding a very disturbed looking Malfoy, who was currently gazing at the creature who had attacked her. "N-nothings working..." she heard him mutter. She turned her head so that she could get a good look of her attacker and burst out laughing with the other few who were laughing.
"T-That's Gollum," she tried to say as she laughed, "he's from a book!" She started to laugh even more at the silliness of it all.
Gollum who was still on the ground, looked up at them all giving them a hurtful look as he unnoticedly was pelted with an assortment of spells. Harry spun around at the end of an incantation at Hermione's words and his spell narrowly missed her and hit Malfoy instead.
Everyone now forgot about Gollum and turned to where Malfoy was standing just an instant ago. All of them burst out laughing, Gryffindors and Slytherins alike, as they saw a white ferret bouncing up and down about 2 feet into the air, where Malfoy was last. No one saw Gollum walk back into the forest.
Ron was heard saying, "It's the Return of the Magnificent Bouncing Ferret!!" At this, everyone laughed even harder (if that was even possible.)
Hagrid chose this moment to return. "Sorry I'm late. C'mon I have a new creature for yeh' all. Hey, where's that Malfoy git?"
Instantly, their was a quick shuffle of almost all the students to hide Malfoy from Hagrid's view. Harry's mind raced as he thought of an explanation, but as he did, he heard Ron say, "Well err-the last time I saw him, he-uh, was really white." The others around started nodding vigorously, trying to suppress their laughs.
Hagrid caught a small sight of a white ferret that a appeared to be jumping up and down 2 feet into the air and suddenly understood. "Well, er- I guess one o' you Slytherins will have to fill him in on the lesson today," deciding to ignore what he saw and led them over to whatever new beast he had smuggled illegally onto the grounds.
Hermione walked over to Harry, "Well, what did you find out?" she asked in a hushed voice, not wanting to be overheard by neither Ron nor Samantha.
"Nothing, that ... what was it, Gollum, came out before she answered."
"Damn. I guess I'll try next time, I don't know where I could ask her without interruptions though..."
Harry thought of his classes when it hit him. "Transfiguration. There are never any distractions in McGanagal's class, she makes she of that."
"Good idea, we have her tomorrow afternoon, I'll ask her then..."
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A/N: Ok I know it's a lame chapter, but I like the next one better!!! If you have any suggestions for a parody I could do, let me know!! Now that you've read, why don't you review!! I don't mind flames, I could put some to use when I make my green eggs and spam tomorrow ... just please REVIEW!!