***********************************TRaPPeD**********************************
Seven: That Other Game - Part One
By Annie
2003-03-21
****************************************************************************
Day Two.
7.56 p.m.
She didn't move, she didn't breathe, and she really didn't want to be looking into his eyes, but she was unable to take her gaze from his as the question quivered in the stillness before slowly sinking in. He took a small step back; removing his closeness, his mouth, his eyes and she finally drew a small breath as she could let herself relax slightly. Then she shook her head a little and crossed her arms over her chest.
"I'm not gonna play anything what so ever with you," she stated and he put on an insulted expression before he replied:
"You bloody well will."
She looked very calm as she observed him in silence. It was needless to say anything, since the stern look on her face said it all, and he narrowed his eyes before taking a step closer to her again. This time she took one back, unwrapping her arms and having her gaze grow into nails and splinters.
He smirked.
"You know," he said, leaning back slightly and letting his eyes run up and then down her body as though she was a prize to be had - adding: "I like that look on you. Lethal. Kinda reminds me of Dru when she was at her peak."
Buffy's clenched fist connected with his jaw in the next instant and his head bopped to his left. He chuckled, grabbing the spot with his right hand before he turned his head back to face her. Her eyes were glowing with fury now and he nodded.
"Like I said - this look just suits you... Makes you almost intimidating. Bloody hell, Slayer...if you wore this a bit more often maybe not so many Big Bads 'd try and take over this stinkin' town," he stated and she hit him again.
This time his head bopped to his right and he came close to losing his balance as the hit was holding a whole new range of fierceness.
"Wow," he complimented, moving his aching jaw as he once more faced her, "you can be kinda powerful when you put your whole mind to it. How come you've gone easy on me all these years?"
This time his hand caught her fist and he twisted her arm back and behind her as he pulled her tight against him. She stared up at him with such a blinding rage she could hardly see straight and then she jumped up and wrapped her legs harshly around his waist. The movement made him stumble and then fall backwards. They hit the floor with a hard thump and in this new position she was straddling him, causing a slow, mischievous glimmer to appear in his eyes, then he taunted:
"You sure you're ready for this?" as he smirked before he looked down at their crotches pressed together. She twisted out of his grip and got to her feet.
"You disgust me," she replied. "And I can't stand you. Now stay the hell away from me."
Turning she walked into the closet space and the door closed behind her.
He huffed, sitting up. If she thought he was supposed to just back down after what he had seen in her eyes she really did have more than one screw loose. Getting to his feet he brushed the dust casually off of him as he approached the closed door.
"I thought you had some sorta code of honor," he said to it. "Make a promise - you don't break it, that sorta thing. Sod it, Buffy," he added, "'cause I sure as hell wouldn't 've acted like some spoiled brat if I'd lost the draw. I'd 've given you my lighter without a second thought 'cause that's the way of the game..."
The door opened and she faced him with a cold glare.
"'Spoiled brat'?" she asked.
"Well, yeah," he smirked again, leaning against the doorframe and watching her for a second before he added: "You want everything the way you want it WHEN you want it. But the real world doesn't work like that... How old are you again? Sixteen? Seventeen?"
Her eyes grew with indignation.
"Nineteen," she replied. "Soon..." she added, voice wavering and his smirk widened. "What are you so damn gloat-y about anyways?" she snapped, brushing past him as she re-entered the basement. "You're old enough to be my great-great-grandfather or something and you're running around acting like you actually think... Like you actually BELIEVE..." trailing off she met his gaze and he tilted his head to the side with a questioning expression in his eyes.
"I know you feel something," he stated with a shrug. "It's like in that movie where Richard Gere says to Julia Ormond 'I can see when a woman wants me'."
"Oh...my God," she breathed, her voice appalled. "You should eat another bag of blood 'cause your brain cells must be deteriorating, and fast too," she added.
He merely smiled and she wanted to get rid of the smug knowledge it seemed to hold.
God, he was out of his mind. She did NOT want him. Just looking at him made her want to pull a shade down before her eyes so she'd get away from the sight of him. He was delusional! So, for a second he had been able to actually twist her mind and his touch had felt... not so vile... But hello! Man, he was annoying.
"So," he said now, biting his lower lip slightly and taking a step forward before adding: "Prove it. Play with me."
She gave him a sideways glare at that, shaking her head a little and then sighing.
"Will you give this stupid mission to... whatever... up if I do?" she asked and he cocked an eyebrow. She turned to him with another look his way. "PROVE it, I mean," she remarked and he smiled widely.
She didn't like that smile. In fact it sent a small shiver of discomfort down her spine.
"All right," he said with one nod.
"'All right' what?" she asked and he hesitated.
"All right I'll give the mission to whatever up if you play with me," he then elaborated.
"Stop saying it like that," she muttered grouchily, walking up to the mattresses and taking a seat as he approached her.
"Saying what like how?" he wondered, stopping before her and there was a moment of contemplating what to answer before she slowly tilted her head back to look up at him.
"'Play with me'," she said, mimicking his suggestiveness as best she could manage and he smirked.
"You're pretty sodding good at that," he commented, turning around and having a seat beside her - though not next to her - and she turned her head slightly to be able to look at him.
"Good at what?" she asked and his smirk broadened.
"Oh... I think you know," he replied and she turned her gaze out of his with a small frown.
Clearing her throat lightly she then demanded:
"So, what's the game?"
"Truth or dare," he replied without even blinking and at that she got to her feet with the disbelief sketching itself across her face.
"You cannot be serious," she stated and he raised both eyebrows.
"I'm always deadly serious," he answered and she gave him a look as black as the night sky before she put her hands on her hips and said:
"Cute, Spike. Real cute."
He gazed up at her, once again tilting his head to the side and then he got to his feet.
"You'll play, or you'll admit defeat - to me," he pointed out and her eyes grew with irritation.
"Truth or dare is a game you play when you're thirteen and wanna know if the boy you like has a crush on you too," she stated now. "It's not the sorta game you play when... when..." not finding a good way to end the sentence she trailed off.
"When you're stuck between a rock and a hard place?" he tried and she sucked in a deep breath through her nose, getting ready to just scream her lungs out with frustration, and then his chuckle stopped her.
She HATED that damn noise!
"You're unbelievable," she muttered.
"Ah, I seem to recall me saying the very same thing about you," he nodded and she bit her jaws together. "Returning of favors?"
"There are no 'favors' between you and me," she replied, voice lowered and laced with anger. "This is totally inappropriate," she added and he merely gave her a look saying save-it. "This is completely obscene!" she grumbled.
"You wanna sing the song of complaint there, Slayer... Or 'prove' me wrong?" he asked and she looked up at him with growing determination.
"Fine. Truth...no matter how ridiculous it seems...or dare it is," she agreed, reaching out a hand to him and he did the same, slipping his fingertips over her palm - she stubbornly ignored the small whisper from a part of her awakened - before his fingers grasped her hand in a tight grip.
They let go.
Silence settled between them, shrugging its shoulders in wait for one of them to speak.
Buffy finally did.
"Any ground rules?"
"No. No bloody rules," he shook his head and she cocked an eyebrow.
"We can't do this just to do it," she stated. "It's totally absurd anyways. If you choose truth I'm sure you'll just lie..."
"And if I choose dare?" he asked, the smile spreading on his lips combined with the sudden twirl of something warm in his gaze made the shiver she had experienced before rise again, though this time it spread like wings across her back and shoulders and the discomfort lifted with it.
She swallowed.
Thrall, she told herself. You'll have to fight it. You can fight it.
"Okay," she mumbled, blinking and then getting a hold on herself. "We'll just say we get five questions each... First one to back down loses. The winner gets to state their prize and it can be absolutely anything that comes to mind... If there's a tie then we'll have to... keep asking," she finished and he smirked, then nodded.
"Sound fair," he concurred.
Silence once more waited as they eyed the other for a short minute.
Spike wished he could straighten out the circling thoughts in his head. He wanted to make them all stand in a line so that he could have a long look at each of them and then simply discard any that didn't seem important or as though they mattered. But they refused to comply, they kept going round and around, and they were making him dizzy.
She was making him dizzy and it vexed him.
She was making him use the word "vex" which had him close to furious with her.
Something was being turned upside down within him. Some vital part that he desperately needed to stay the way it was seemed to be carefully switching position and he struggled to keep it from doing so by thinking the most horrible, evil thoughts he could possibly think up.
It wasn't working, though. His mind was focusing on something entirely different.
On her.
Once again, there she was. A disturbance. Turbulence on the frail route of his, up until this moment, sane mind. Well, he merely wanted her. And the least he could do for himself was to not show just how much she kept affecting him. Infecting him with her scent and the way she moved, how her lips had felt as he brushed his against them... Things she would never know, things he would NEVER tell.
"I'll start," she muttered now and he was brought out of his thoughts as he watched her take a grumpy seat on the floor, glancing up at him and obviously expecting him to follow her movement.
He slowly obliged, sitting down to face her.
Buffy didn't know what the hell to ask him. There was nothing she felt compelled to know about him! Well, except...
"Okay," she said, the light of interest flickering on in her eyes making him stiffen slightly. This might not have been sucha good idea. "Truth...or dare?"
If he chose truth... Well, he could lie, of course. Somehow something told him that he wouldn't, though. That he couldn't. He loved to cheat. He always cheated. It was a bit more edge in it, just a tad more of a gamble. But this time...
If he chose dare, on the other hand. He couldn't cheat his way out of doing whatever it was she would call on him to do and...
"Truth," he replied and she cocked an eyebrow, the smile spreading made him feel the need to gulp.
"What's your darkest fear?" she asked.
Bloody sodding buggering hell!
"I don't have one," he answered much too fast and she gave him a meaningful look.
Lie, you wanker! It's just the Slayer. Not a lie detector! She won't know!
But that something that somehow had spoken up before seemed sure that somehow she would know.
"Bollocks," he muttered. "My darkest fear, eh?" She nodded, the intrigued anticipation on her face made him clench his jaws together. He didn't know why he said what he did, wasn't sure where the words came from, but as he spoke them he knew that he meant them. "My darkest fear is that, in the end, I'll always be alone... It won't matter what I do, where I go, who I'm with... I'll just feel lonely. Forever."
She stared at him.
"That's the saddest thing I've ever heard," she said, the trace of irony in her voice making him glare at her.
"Well, look-see bleeding here then, Slayer," he replied, "at where we're at. At where the hell I'M at. Trapped in here with you FOREVER! Talk about feeling lonely. You're icier than the bloody fridge."
She smiled a gentle smile at that, the sarcasm this time seeping through her features made him want to shake her hard.
"My turn," he then grumbled. "Truth or dare, precious?"
"Truth," she answered, seemingly very sure of herself.
"The first time we met," he said and she blinked as the memory danced within the frame of her mind, "I scared you. Didn't I?"
She remembered him then. How a stranger in a leather duster and with bleached hair had looked at her with his piercing blue eyes, commending her on a job well done before stating that he was going to kill her.
She shivered.
"Yes," she mumbled. Then she shook her head to clear it and turned her gaze into his. "Yeah, you did," she added with a little less breathlessness. "All right?!"
He smirked.
"How much?" he wondered and she put up one index finger saying:
"Don't push it. Besides, MY turn."
He waited as she thought for a few seconds, then she seemed to decide before she asked the question for the second time:
"Truth or dare."
Well, look where the hell truth had gotten him.
"Dare," he sighed and her face was graced with a smile.
"Oh...bloody hell," he mumbled at the sight of it.
"I want you to stand on your hands and cluck," she said and his eyes grew.
"Cluck?!" he exclaimed.
"Like a chicken," she nodded.
"I most bloody certainly will NOT!" he replied.
"Then I get to name my prize," she remarked and he got to his feet, walked up to the wall and quickly got himself prompted up against it - upside down.
Buffy was already giggling.
"Now...cluck," she demanded and once he started she began to laugh.
"Are you bleeding well satisfied?!" he finally growled and she took a deep breath, then nodded and he let himself down.
Swirling around he walked up to her and she rose to her feet, still smiling brightly.
"That was one of the best performances I've seen from you, Spikey," she teased.
"And you haven't even begun to experience them," he replied and her smile minimized in size at the light tremble running through her as her brain worked though the insinuation of that statement.
"Truth?" he now asked. "Or dare?"
She swallowed. The sudden demanding expression in his eyes showed that he wanted redemption.
Fast.
"Truth," she answered, hesitant and unsure.
"Was Angel your first?" he asked and she looked at him, taken off guard by that question.
"Boyfriend?" she wondered and he shook his head.
"Was he the first you ever shagged," he elaborated and she frowned at the crudeness of that blunt inquiry.
"Why the hell do you wanna know that?" she asked and was about to turn from him when he grabbed her upper arm harshly, making her stop and look up at him.
"I want an answer," he said, "or I'll be the one claiming my prize."
She bit her jaws together.
"Yes," she then confirmed. "He was my first."
"You know... Angelus said something about the event," Spike now stated and suddenly her eyes grew vulnerable as she tried to tug her arm free from his grip. "The little he could feel of it," the bleached vamp continued, pulling her closer as he leaned forward and then whispered: "It wasn't pretty."
She tore loose with a yell, taking a few steps back and away from him.
"Truth or dare?" she demanded, voice quivering slightly and he shrugged.
"Ah, why not pick the truth this time?" he wondered with a small smile.
"Then I wanna know, Spike," she said, her strength coming back to her as she took a step forward again, "I wanna know why the hell you think you can judge me, when all you've ever known of 'love' - as you call it - has been the chilled embrace of your crazed ex-girlfriend? A hell-bitch extraordinaire, who not only dumped you for Angel - but drove you as far as coming to ME for help in getting her back. If anything, I'd say THAT wasn't pretty at all."
He took a step forward, his eyes hard and she met his gaze with such a lack of respect it made him see red.
"Shut up," he replied. "You don't know a sodding thing 'bout me and Dru."
She smirked.
"Aw, poor Spike, still dwelling on the past. You're afraid to be lonely? You're a killer. A murderer. A demon." She huffed. "Do you think anyone could ever actually WANT to be near a creature like you? Unless she's completely brain dead or a raving bimbo like Harmony," she added and he cocked an eyebrow.
"There's a difference?" he asked and the Slayer couldn't help but smile a crooked smile before she suppressed it and the anger came back into full view. "You know what I mean when I speak of loneliness," he then stated. "Sometimes you feel outside your own crowd, looking in on them. Watching over them. Constantly. It's a responsibility, innit? And not an easy one. So, when you crawl beneath the sheets at night and rest your little head on your soft pillow you feel it. I know you do. That creeping notion that no matter what, when it all comes to a close you'll be standing on one side - the stronger side - and you'll be fighting for your friends, to keep them alive. And not WITH your friends."
She swallowed.
"Stop it," she grumbled, shaking her head and taking her gaze out of his.
"I can judge you," he now said silently, "'cause in a way - you and me - we're exactly the same."
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Oh, wow, you guys. *smiles widely* When a story is doing well it just gets you so high, you know? Thanks ever so much, y'all! I can't even begin to describe the feeling, it's too GREAT! I luv it! And I HOPE you liked this chapter as well.
Special thanks to Alyssa, Renee, LILI, mulderluva, Luna, Haley, LizDarcy (oh, yes, I LOVE that book. Have you seen the BBC series w/ Colin Firth? Yum!), Captain and Fearless Leader, Pine, SpikeyZebra, Reader, Falcon-Rider (hi!) and Heather - thank YOUUUUU! Luv y'all!
Well, part two of this chapter has yet to be written and you know how fast my fingers can work with a bitta encouragement! ;) I don't wanna get self- confident here and so I just have to keep askin' it of ya!
Thanks again and...
A.M.L, Annie.
Seven: That Other Game - Part One
By Annie
2003-03-21
****************************************************************************
Day Two.
7.56 p.m.
She didn't move, she didn't breathe, and she really didn't want to be looking into his eyes, but she was unable to take her gaze from his as the question quivered in the stillness before slowly sinking in. He took a small step back; removing his closeness, his mouth, his eyes and she finally drew a small breath as she could let herself relax slightly. Then she shook her head a little and crossed her arms over her chest.
"I'm not gonna play anything what so ever with you," she stated and he put on an insulted expression before he replied:
"You bloody well will."
She looked very calm as she observed him in silence. It was needless to say anything, since the stern look on her face said it all, and he narrowed his eyes before taking a step closer to her again. This time she took one back, unwrapping her arms and having her gaze grow into nails and splinters.
He smirked.
"You know," he said, leaning back slightly and letting his eyes run up and then down her body as though she was a prize to be had - adding: "I like that look on you. Lethal. Kinda reminds me of Dru when she was at her peak."
Buffy's clenched fist connected with his jaw in the next instant and his head bopped to his left. He chuckled, grabbing the spot with his right hand before he turned his head back to face her. Her eyes were glowing with fury now and he nodded.
"Like I said - this look just suits you... Makes you almost intimidating. Bloody hell, Slayer...if you wore this a bit more often maybe not so many Big Bads 'd try and take over this stinkin' town," he stated and she hit him again.
This time his head bopped to his right and he came close to losing his balance as the hit was holding a whole new range of fierceness.
"Wow," he complimented, moving his aching jaw as he once more faced her, "you can be kinda powerful when you put your whole mind to it. How come you've gone easy on me all these years?"
This time his hand caught her fist and he twisted her arm back and behind her as he pulled her tight against him. She stared up at him with such a blinding rage she could hardly see straight and then she jumped up and wrapped her legs harshly around his waist. The movement made him stumble and then fall backwards. They hit the floor with a hard thump and in this new position she was straddling him, causing a slow, mischievous glimmer to appear in his eyes, then he taunted:
"You sure you're ready for this?" as he smirked before he looked down at their crotches pressed together. She twisted out of his grip and got to her feet.
"You disgust me," she replied. "And I can't stand you. Now stay the hell away from me."
Turning she walked into the closet space and the door closed behind her.
He huffed, sitting up. If she thought he was supposed to just back down after what he had seen in her eyes she really did have more than one screw loose. Getting to his feet he brushed the dust casually off of him as he approached the closed door.
"I thought you had some sorta code of honor," he said to it. "Make a promise - you don't break it, that sorta thing. Sod it, Buffy," he added, "'cause I sure as hell wouldn't 've acted like some spoiled brat if I'd lost the draw. I'd 've given you my lighter without a second thought 'cause that's the way of the game..."
The door opened and she faced him with a cold glare.
"'Spoiled brat'?" she asked.
"Well, yeah," he smirked again, leaning against the doorframe and watching her for a second before he added: "You want everything the way you want it WHEN you want it. But the real world doesn't work like that... How old are you again? Sixteen? Seventeen?"
Her eyes grew with indignation.
"Nineteen," she replied. "Soon..." she added, voice wavering and his smirk widened. "What are you so damn gloat-y about anyways?" she snapped, brushing past him as she re-entered the basement. "You're old enough to be my great-great-grandfather or something and you're running around acting like you actually think... Like you actually BELIEVE..." trailing off she met his gaze and he tilted his head to the side with a questioning expression in his eyes.
"I know you feel something," he stated with a shrug. "It's like in that movie where Richard Gere says to Julia Ormond 'I can see when a woman wants me'."
"Oh...my God," she breathed, her voice appalled. "You should eat another bag of blood 'cause your brain cells must be deteriorating, and fast too," she added.
He merely smiled and she wanted to get rid of the smug knowledge it seemed to hold.
God, he was out of his mind. She did NOT want him. Just looking at him made her want to pull a shade down before her eyes so she'd get away from the sight of him. He was delusional! So, for a second he had been able to actually twist her mind and his touch had felt... not so vile... But hello! Man, he was annoying.
"So," he said now, biting his lower lip slightly and taking a step forward before adding: "Prove it. Play with me."
She gave him a sideways glare at that, shaking her head a little and then sighing.
"Will you give this stupid mission to... whatever... up if I do?" she asked and he cocked an eyebrow. She turned to him with another look his way. "PROVE it, I mean," she remarked and he smiled widely.
She didn't like that smile. In fact it sent a small shiver of discomfort down her spine.
"All right," he said with one nod.
"'All right' what?" she asked and he hesitated.
"All right I'll give the mission to whatever up if you play with me," he then elaborated.
"Stop saying it like that," she muttered grouchily, walking up to the mattresses and taking a seat as he approached her.
"Saying what like how?" he wondered, stopping before her and there was a moment of contemplating what to answer before she slowly tilted her head back to look up at him.
"'Play with me'," she said, mimicking his suggestiveness as best she could manage and he smirked.
"You're pretty sodding good at that," he commented, turning around and having a seat beside her - though not next to her - and she turned her head slightly to be able to look at him.
"Good at what?" she asked and his smirk broadened.
"Oh... I think you know," he replied and she turned her gaze out of his with a small frown.
Clearing her throat lightly she then demanded:
"So, what's the game?"
"Truth or dare," he replied without even blinking and at that she got to her feet with the disbelief sketching itself across her face.
"You cannot be serious," she stated and he raised both eyebrows.
"I'm always deadly serious," he answered and she gave him a look as black as the night sky before she put her hands on her hips and said:
"Cute, Spike. Real cute."
He gazed up at her, once again tilting his head to the side and then he got to his feet.
"You'll play, or you'll admit defeat - to me," he pointed out and her eyes grew with irritation.
"Truth or dare is a game you play when you're thirteen and wanna know if the boy you like has a crush on you too," she stated now. "It's not the sorta game you play when... when..." not finding a good way to end the sentence she trailed off.
"When you're stuck between a rock and a hard place?" he tried and she sucked in a deep breath through her nose, getting ready to just scream her lungs out with frustration, and then his chuckle stopped her.
She HATED that damn noise!
"You're unbelievable," she muttered.
"Ah, I seem to recall me saying the very same thing about you," he nodded and she bit her jaws together. "Returning of favors?"
"There are no 'favors' between you and me," she replied, voice lowered and laced with anger. "This is totally inappropriate," she added and he merely gave her a look saying save-it. "This is completely obscene!" she grumbled.
"You wanna sing the song of complaint there, Slayer... Or 'prove' me wrong?" he asked and she looked up at him with growing determination.
"Fine. Truth...no matter how ridiculous it seems...or dare it is," she agreed, reaching out a hand to him and he did the same, slipping his fingertips over her palm - she stubbornly ignored the small whisper from a part of her awakened - before his fingers grasped her hand in a tight grip.
They let go.
Silence settled between them, shrugging its shoulders in wait for one of them to speak.
Buffy finally did.
"Any ground rules?"
"No. No bloody rules," he shook his head and she cocked an eyebrow.
"We can't do this just to do it," she stated. "It's totally absurd anyways. If you choose truth I'm sure you'll just lie..."
"And if I choose dare?" he asked, the smile spreading on his lips combined with the sudden twirl of something warm in his gaze made the shiver she had experienced before rise again, though this time it spread like wings across her back and shoulders and the discomfort lifted with it.
She swallowed.
Thrall, she told herself. You'll have to fight it. You can fight it.
"Okay," she mumbled, blinking and then getting a hold on herself. "We'll just say we get five questions each... First one to back down loses. The winner gets to state their prize and it can be absolutely anything that comes to mind... If there's a tie then we'll have to... keep asking," she finished and he smirked, then nodded.
"Sound fair," he concurred.
Silence once more waited as they eyed the other for a short minute.
Spike wished he could straighten out the circling thoughts in his head. He wanted to make them all stand in a line so that he could have a long look at each of them and then simply discard any that didn't seem important or as though they mattered. But they refused to comply, they kept going round and around, and they were making him dizzy.
She was making him dizzy and it vexed him.
She was making him use the word "vex" which had him close to furious with her.
Something was being turned upside down within him. Some vital part that he desperately needed to stay the way it was seemed to be carefully switching position and he struggled to keep it from doing so by thinking the most horrible, evil thoughts he could possibly think up.
It wasn't working, though. His mind was focusing on something entirely different.
On her.
Once again, there she was. A disturbance. Turbulence on the frail route of his, up until this moment, sane mind. Well, he merely wanted her. And the least he could do for himself was to not show just how much she kept affecting him. Infecting him with her scent and the way she moved, how her lips had felt as he brushed his against them... Things she would never know, things he would NEVER tell.
"I'll start," she muttered now and he was brought out of his thoughts as he watched her take a grumpy seat on the floor, glancing up at him and obviously expecting him to follow her movement.
He slowly obliged, sitting down to face her.
Buffy didn't know what the hell to ask him. There was nothing she felt compelled to know about him! Well, except...
"Okay," she said, the light of interest flickering on in her eyes making him stiffen slightly. This might not have been sucha good idea. "Truth...or dare?"
If he chose truth... Well, he could lie, of course. Somehow something told him that he wouldn't, though. That he couldn't. He loved to cheat. He always cheated. It was a bit more edge in it, just a tad more of a gamble. But this time...
If he chose dare, on the other hand. He couldn't cheat his way out of doing whatever it was she would call on him to do and...
"Truth," he replied and she cocked an eyebrow, the smile spreading made him feel the need to gulp.
"What's your darkest fear?" she asked.
Bloody sodding buggering hell!
"I don't have one," he answered much too fast and she gave him a meaningful look.
Lie, you wanker! It's just the Slayer. Not a lie detector! She won't know!
But that something that somehow had spoken up before seemed sure that somehow she would know.
"Bollocks," he muttered. "My darkest fear, eh?" She nodded, the intrigued anticipation on her face made him clench his jaws together. He didn't know why he said what he did, wasn't sure where the words came from, but as he spoke them he knew that he meant them. "My darkest fear is that, in the end, I'll always be alone... It won't matter what I do, where I go, who I'm with... I'll just feel lonely. Forever."
She stared at him.
"That's the saddest thing I've ever heard," she said, the trace of irony in her voice making him glare at her.
"Well, look-see bleeding here then, Slayer," he replied, "at where we're at. At where the hell I'M at. Trapped in here with you FOREVER! Talk about feeling lonely. You're icier than the bloody fridge."
She smiled a gentle smile at that, the sarcasm this time seeping through her features made him want to shake her hard.
"My turn," he then grumbled. "Truth or dare, precious?"
"Truth," she answered, seemingly very sure of herself.
"The first time we met," he said and she blinked as the memory danced within the frame of her mind, "I scared you. Didn't I?"
She remembered him then. How a stranger in a leather duster and with bleached hair had looked at her with his piercing blue eyes, commending her on a job well done before stating that he was going to kill her.
She shivered.
"Yes," she mumbled. Then she shook her head to clear it and turned her gaze into his. "Yeah, you did," she added with a little less breathlessness. "All right?!"
He smirked.
"How much?" he wondered and she put up one index finger saying:
"Don't push it. Besides, MY turn."
He waited as she thought for a few seconds, then she seemed to decide before she asked the question for the second time:
"Truth or dare."
Well, look where the hell truth had gotten him.
"Dare," he sighed and her face was graced with a smile.
"Oh...bloody hell," he mumbled at the sight of it.
"I want you to stand on your hands and cluck," she said and his eyes grew.
"Cluck?!" he exclaimed.
"Like a chicken," she nodded.
"I most bloody certainly will NOT!" he replied.
"Then I get to name my prize," she remarked and he got to his feet, walked up to the wall and quickly got himself prompted up against it - upside down.
Buffy was already giggling.
"Now...cluck," she demanded and once he started she began to laugh.
"Are you bleeding well satisfied?!" he finally growled and she took a deep breath, then nodded and he let himself down.
Swirling around he walked up to her and she rose to her feet, still smiling brightly.
"That was one of the best performances I've seen from you, Spikey," she teased.
"And you haven't even begun to experience them," he replied and her smile minimized in size at the light tremble running through her as her brain worked though the insinuation of that statement.
"Truth?" he now asked. "Or dare?"
She swallowed. The sudden demanding expression in his eyes showed that he wanted redemption.
Fast.
"Truth," she answered, hesitant and unsure.
"Was Angel your first?" he asked and she looked at him, taken off guard by that question.
"Boyfriend?" she wondered and he shook his head.
"Was he the first you ever shagged," he elaborated and she frowned at the crudeness of that blunt inquiry.
"Why the hell do you wanna know that?" she asked and was about to turn from him when he grabbed her upper arm harshly, making her stop and look up at him.
"I want an answer," he said, "or I'll be the one claiming my prize."
She bit her jaws together.
"Yes," she then confirmed. "He was my first."
"You know... Angelus said something about the event," Spike now stated and suddenly her eyes grew vulnerable as she tried to tug her arm free from his grip. "The little he could feel of it," the bleached vamp continued, pulling her closer as he leaned forward and then whispered: "It wasn't pretty."
She tore loose with a yell, taking a few steps back and away from him.
"Truth or dare?" she demanded, voice quivering slightly and he shrugged.
"Ah, why not pick the truth this time?" he wondered with a small smile.
"Then I wanna know, Spike," she said, her strength coming back to her as she took a step forward again, "I wanna know why the hell you think you can judge me, when all you've ever known of 'love' - as you call it - has been the chilled embrace of your crazed ex-girlfriend? A hell-bitch extraordinaire, who not only dumped you for Angel - but drove you as far as coming to ME for help in getting her back. If anything, I'd say THAT wasn't pretty at all."
He took a step forward, his eyes hard and she met his gaze with such a lack of respect it made him see red.
"Shut up," he replied. "You don't know a sodding thing 'bout me and Dru."
She smirked.
"Aw, poor Spike, still dwelling on the past. You're afraid to be lonely? You're a killer. A murderer. A demon." She huffed. "Do you think anyone could ever actually WANT to be near a creature like you? Unless she's completely brain dead or a raving bimbo like Harmony," she added and he cocked an eyebrow.
"There's a difference?" he asked and the Slayer couldn't help but smile a crooked smile before she suppressed it and the anger came back into full view. "You know what I mean when I speak of loneliness," he then stated. "Sometimes you feel outside your own crowd, looking in on them. Watching over them. Constantly. It's a responsibility, innit? And not an easy one. So, when you crawl beneath the sheets at night and rest your little head on your soft pillow you feel it. I know you do. That creeping notion that no matter what, when it all comes to a close you'll be standing on one side - the stronger side - and you'll be fighting for your friends, to keep them alive. And not WITH your friends."
She swallowed.
"Stop it," she grumbled, shaking her head and taking her gaze out of his.
"I can judge you," he now said silently, "'cause in a way - you and me - we're exactly the same."
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Oh, wow, you guys. *smiles widely* When a story is doing well it just gets you so high, you know? Thanks ever so much, y'all! I can't even begin to describe the feeling, it's too GREAT! I luv it! And I HOPE you liked this chapter as well.
Special thanks to Alyssa, Renee, LILI, mulderluva, Luna, Haley, LizDarcy (oh, yes, I LOVE that book. Have you seen the BBC series w/ Colin Firth? Yum!), Captain and Fearless Leader, Pine, SpikeyZebra, Reader, Falcon-Rider (hi!) and Heather - thank YOUUUUU! Luv y'all!
Well, part two of this chapter has yet to be written and you know how fast my fingers can work with a bitta encouragement! ;) I don't wanna get self- confident here and so I just have to keep askin' it of ya!
Thanks again and...
A.M.L, Annie.