************************************TRApPeD*********************************
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Sixteen: Nowhere Near
By Annie
2003-04-05
**************************************************************************** *****
Day Ten.
4.54 p.m.
Damn him. DAMN him!
Damned be this attitude that everything about her could be used against her. She WASN'T the bull's-eye of an easy target and he needed to learn that. He needed to see that so that he would climb off that laughable excuse for a high horse he was on and come back down to earth. He was crazy to think that she would ever feel gratitude towards him for leading her to do the absolute most indecent act she had ever done.
"Sleeping with me was the best thing that could've happened to you - 'cause it made you have to face yourself, didn't it?"
'Face myself' my butt! she thought to herself as she stormed across the cemetery hosting his crypt, continuing on her way toward the college. The only thing I've had to face has been the fact that some twisted, nauseating need has been triggered for some inexplicable reason and now...
Her thoughts trailed off as she slowed herself down to a stop. She was breathing heavily as she tried to calm herself down.
The feel of him was still all over her body. Teasing her senses and revving her up again.
Getting herself moving she huffed with annoyance. She couldn't calm down. She could never have an emotion such as that inside her in any situation that boiled down to having to do with HIM! She needed to hit something and she needed to hit it hard or she would explode. Or implode. Or just vanish from the earth without a trace!
That'd make him happy, she grumbled in her head. That'd make him build a fire and do a victory dance around it. That'd make him... You don't know what that would make him do, Buffy. Don't presume to know. Don't kid yourself that you know. You. Don't. Know. Him.
She clenched her jaws together at the low mumble clouding her mind as a response to that. It whispered its words and she wanted to ignore them, but was forced to listen.
But I know his chest, it sounded. I know every curve of his face. I know the slight slant of his lower lip and I know the taste of his mouth. I know how his hands can move me, how they crave me and lets me know it... how they rule my skin...
"Stop," she interrupted herself.
He had been wrong in what he had said. She had never not dared to face the darker part within her. She had been thrown into the fact of it when Faith came into spice up the boil of the former's already mixed up life. Back then she had seen the power of that darker side of herself, she had seen it in Faith's eyes the night she killed a human and never gave it a second thought... That moment had been when the Slayer had made the final decision, outruling any other, that she would never let herself come to that. Not ever.
But with him inside of her... something roared. Something clawed at her. And so he had also been right, because once again she was standing face to face with a side of herself that she had written off as retracted, overcome. A side that was weak before temptation, which didn't frown upon the wrongs of what being with him dredged up, which felt no sorrow or regret and which kept falling into pure surrender in his presence.
Once again she had to beat it down within herself.
She was so sick of it. So tired of it. She wanted it gone already. She couldn't let it get any stronger, it had already made her give in once and if it happened one more time she was certain it would take that as encouragement to fight for its existence.
I'm creating some kind of pseudo-schizophrenia in my mind for myself, she mused, shaking her head at herself. I think it's time we made this official and just dragged me off to a padded cell. Well, it might be a good solution... she added with a sigh, reaching campus grounds and starting toward her dorm.
And why was she so sensitive to what he said anyways? It wasn't like she needed to put any weight to the words. He was just some shell of a vamp that had tried to kill her a few times, nothing more. So, she had screwed that shell until she almost could have sworn that she had sensed its heart beating in perfect sync with her own. And that shell had been able to...
Buffy, she warned herself. Buffy. It's Spike, is what it is.
As if she could ever forget that...
She walked over the lawn stretching before her dormatory, her pace had slowed down and she stepped up the few steps there was as she reached the front door. Putting her hand on the chilled knob she tried to get her head back on straight.
"Buffy," his voice sounded to her left and she spun around, ready to take a blow and even more prepared to deliver one.
"Spike, what the hell?!" she exclaimed as he took a hesitant step forward.
The shadow which the large obelisk - in which they were standing before the doors - created was barely enough for him not to be burned by the golden rays of the sun, but it seemed to be enough since he made no effort to pull back into the darker parts again.
He looked at her and felt a wave of insecurity wash over him. He never felt insecure and the fact that he did made him feel even more uncertain as to what he had come to do being what he actually should be doing. She'd think him nuts for sure after this.
She was growing impatient, he could see that on her posture, and so he should probably make it quick and painless. Though he didn't know where to start and so he simply eyed her in search for a way to begin.
Her brow slowly furrowed.
"Well, did you come to ogle me and stand there gaping or did you have some evil scheme in mind? Am I in on it this time, are you trying to put thoughts in my head now or what? Pictures? Vivid ones of my pending doom? Trying to scare me?" she asked and he blinked, getting a hold on the excuse for a wanker that he was becoming - shuddering at the mere thought - and about to answer when she added: "God, could you BE any more aggravating?!"
Turning from him she put her hand on the knob of the door and was just about to clear her way inside when he spoke.
"I'm sorry."
It was a hushed murmur, but she picked up on it as though it had its very own beacon and her eyes grew slightly. Her motion was put on hold and she stood very still before she carefully turned back to face him.
"What?" she asked, tone incredulous as she observed him and he let hear a very low growl, resting his eyes in hers.
"I said: I am sorry," he developed his sentence and she could detect the undertone of sarcasm this time, which made her irritated again.
"For what?" she wanted to know and he gave her a look.
Knowing that he might as well go the whole nine yards now that he had bloody well begun to trot down the first few he humored her.
"I was out of line," he replied. "And I wanted to...apologize."
She smiled, seemingly very unimpressed.
"What do you want?" she asked.
"What I 'want'?" he asked back and she nodded.
"Yes," she answered slowly. "You didn't think I'd actually believe that you came here purely for the enjoyment of hearing me grant you forgiveness for something I'm not even sure what it is, did you?" she then inquired and he sighed, rolling his eyes to the sky above and shaking his head.
"What is it with you, Summers?" he wondered, turning his gaze back in hers. "No matter what anyone ever does, it's never sodding enough, is it? You just want a bigger piece and when you can't get it you try to slice it off the only way you know how: with violence. Doesn't matter to you if it's verbally or physically, as long as it gets the job done."
She smiled a bitter smile at that.
"Why did you come here?" she demanded and he took another step forward.
"I came to say that what I said back there..." he trailed off as she looked up at him.
Her eyes caught his and something swirled deep down within him that made him draw a small breath of the evening air. He felt the on the brink to maddening need to just reach out and touch her, she was so close. Not able to fight the urge he reached up his left hand and slid it over her blonde locks.
Her eyes grew a little.
That touch was too soft to be him... What was he doing?!
His hand seemed to grab a tight hold on itself as it folded into a fist and dropped to rest at his side instead. She stared into his eyes and felt her heart beat a tad harder at the twirl of emotions she thought she could read in them: the surprise he felt himself at what he had just done, the anger that rose at the action, but also - somewhere deep down in those pools - a burning warmth of something hidden.
She took a small step back.
"You need to go," she said.
"Buffy..."
"Just go," she shook her head.
"You realize you completely blew this whole oh-I-sodding-forget act you've been pulling, don't you? With what you said to me back there," he asked and she closed her eyes for a short second and then opened them to look at him.
"Yes," she then replied. "Yeah, I do."
"So?" he wondered and she raised her eyebrows.
"So what?" she shot. "So, I remember. What does that change, Spike? Nothing. I still can't be around you, I don't want you around me, and as far as I'm concerned what happened down there... Well, it never happened."
"What about the kiss?" he asked and she took another step back as he took one forward.
"It was..." she tried, but he cut her off.
"I kissed you," he said and she swallowed, then pressed on an indifferent expression as she nodded. "And you definitely kissed me back," he added and she drew a breath as he stopped much too close to her. "And I'm still here."
"I've asked you to leave, you won't," she defended and a small smile graced his lips.
"You said that this was supposed to be our very last encounter," he pointed out and she sidestepped him before walking down the steps and onto the grass shadowed by the building. "You promised," he added, coming up to stand behind her and she once more turned to face him.
"Is it what you want?" she asked, reaching back and bringing out her stake. "Is that what you want?" she demanded as she stepped up to him, raising her arm and his body grew rigid tough he didn't even blink.
"You know what I want," he replied.
"No," she disagreed, lowering her arm and turning from him. "No, Spike. I don't know what the hell you want. You bully me, you ridicule me, you hate me, you seduce me..." she trailed off as she threw the stake in the grass before swirling around and beginning to pace before him.
He watched her.
"You're doing that Slayer walk again," he remarked and she glared at him. "Doesn't bode well."
"Shut up," she growled. "You think you're so smart, you think you're just the cleverest little vamp around, don't you? Then WHY can't you get it through your thick skull that I don't WANT this?!"
"Then what the bleeding hell DO you want?!" he suddenly burst out, taking the steps dividing them and she looked up at him as he stopped before her, his gaze ablaze with impatient fury. "You say you don't want this, that you don't want me - but everytime I look at you I can see what I do to you. Buffy, how you just kissed me... THAT isn't NOT wanting. That's being so bloody starved for it that you..."
"Don't even start!" she interrupted him. "It's not like that. This, you and me, it's nothing. Understand?! I'm in love with Riley! I love him!"
"Do you think I want your LOVE?!" Spike retorted with a snarl.
"I don't give a damn what you want!" she yelled, suddenly remembering where she was and lowering her voice as she added. "What I have with Riley is something you could never understand! He makes me happy and more importantly - I make HIM happy. And I can't keep doing this to him..."
"Doing what exactly?" Spike cut in and she bit her jaws together hard before she ignored his input and continued with:
"This is over. Right now. And I mean it, I don't wanna see you again."
"If that's what you need to tell yourself," he mumbled as she turned from him, walking back up to the double doors. "I know better," he added and she glanced at him before she pushed the right door open and proceeded inside.
***
5.23 p.m.
"What was that all about?" Willow wondered curiously as Buffy carefully closed the bedroom door behind her back.
The Slayer spun around at the sound of her voice, looking rather busted and Willow - seated on her bed - grew quizzical at the defensive posture the former was adopting. Then Buffy relaxed and shook her head.
"Never mind," she muttered, pulling her jacket off and walking up to her own bed to sit as well.
"I saw Spike," the Wicca said and Buffy threw herself backwards with a sigh.
"Mh-hmh," she murmured.
"And I saw you arguing with Spike," Willow continued.
"Yes," Buffy breathed tiredly.
"And I saw you taking a stake and almost poofing Spike," Willow finished her recap and Buffy grumbled.
"Almost," she then agreed silently.
"Buffy, is something going on that...?"
"I can't talk about this right now," Buffy cut her off, getting to her feet again and walking back up to the door. "I'm sorry, Wills. I just... I have to see Riley," she added, opening the door and stepping through it.
As she disappeared Willow sighed.
"Of course you do," she grumbled.
***
Day Twelve.
8.30 a.m.
"So, you really went through with it?"
Buffy looked up as she heard his voice, questioning, and the vamp took a step forward - the shadows slipping off him as though the ground was the floor of a stage, and the former were the curtain revealing its contents. His eyes glittered, blue and deep - the actor was stripped off him, he stood before her without any mask on, center stage before his one-woman audience. She stared at him in astonishment.
"Went through with what?" she finally asked and he smiled a small smile.
"I just wanna know, Buffy... Was it his touch you felt? Or was it mine?"
Her eyes grew.
She looked down at herself and realized that she was naked, that she was seated on a bed. Spike slowly approached her, slipping his duster off his shoulders as he went and then he stopped before her. His torso was bare and the moonlight sculpted his chest lovingly with its rays.
"I'm in love..." she tried, wanted those words to make the situation sensible to him, make him understand once and for all.
But her enemy's eyes, those hated orbs with their chilling gaze, softened beyond recognition at her words before he reached out his left hand and gently let it slide over her blonde locks.
"So am I," he whispered.
The dream slipped away the next instant and before she knew it she was slowly opening her eyes. She frowned, finding herself feeling misplaced and unable to conclude where the heck she was. Then it came to her: she was in a bed. The same bed that had been in her dream and...
Turning around with her heart in her throat she rested her gaze in Riley's.
"Hey," he said gently and she stared at him, at first not sure who he was, and then the pieces quickly created the puzzle of what had happened the night prior. "What's the matter?" he then asked, a small smile spreading over his lips as he added: "Weren't expecting to see ME?"
She smiled back, tentatively. Trying to battle back the lump in her chest as the dream seemed set on playing itself over and over in her head.
'I'm in love...'
'So am I...'
"I never know what to expect," she mumbled, still smiling a little, keeping the rumble of confusion within her off her face.
She looked at Riley, and ultimately succeeded in her quest. Pausing the dream she pushed the visual of it as far down as she possibly could get it. It didn't matter. It was her subconscious playing some warped prank on her. It was only a dream, for crying out loud. Nothing to get herself worked up over. No, nothing at all. Growing slightly serious she bent forward to give her lover a kiss.
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Oh, thank you SO much for your thoughts on that chapter and I'm so, so pleased to read that you enjoyed it! I have to go to work in fifteen minutes, but I wanted to get this up before that so I hope you liked this as well! I dunno if most of you get where in the line of episodes we are - but this has a small bit in it from "The I in TEAM." (All rights to David Fury, Joss Whedon and Co., of course.)
Special thanks to LizDarcy, Johanna, Alyssa, charisma1525, Renee', Haley, LILI, learyl, Heather, Pine and daphoid - thank you SOSOSO much for your everlasting encouragement! I'm so sorry this is so hasty but I have to get going! I'll be back though, to rectify my hurry, k?
Oh, and Heather - I'm really not at all sure how many more chapters there will be to this... It completely depends on how the story develops. I wanna write it for as long as you wanna read it, but then there is the fact of knowing when to stop and so I guess that comes down to me. ;) Okay, so the answer is it will keep going indefinitely, for now. :)
Thanks again! Your positivity keeps me going on this!
A.M.L, Annie.
Sixteen: Nowhere Near
By Annie
2003-04-05
**************************************************************************** *****
Day Ten.
4.54 p.m.
Damn him. DAMN him!
Damned be this attitude that everything about her could be used against her. She WASN'T the bull's-eye of an easy target and he needed to learn that. He needed to see that so that he would climb off that laughable excuse for a high horse he was on and come back down to earth. He was crazy to think that she would ever feel gratitude towards him for leading her to do the absolute most indecent act she had ever done.
"Sleeping with me was the best thing that could've happened to you - 'cause it made you have to face yourself, didn't it?"
'Face myself' my butt! she thought to herself as she stormed across the cemetery hosting his crypt, continuing on her way toward the college. The only thing I've had to face has been the fact that some twisted, nauseating need has been triggered for some inexplicable reason and now...
Her thoughts trailed off as she slowed herself down to a stop. She was breathing heavily as she tried to calm herself down.
The feel of him was still all over her body. Teasing her senses and revving her up again.
Getting herself moving she huffed with annoyance. She couldn't calm down. She could never have an emotion such as that inside her in any situation that boiled down to having to do with HIM! She needed to hit something and she needed to hit it hard or she would explode. Or implode. Or just vanish from the earth without a trace!
That'd make him happy, she grumbled in her head. That'd make him build a fire and do a victory dance around it. That'd make him... You don't know what that would make him do, Buffy. Don't presume to know. Don't kid yourself that you know. You. Don't. Know. Him.
She clenched her jaws together at the low mumble clouding her mind as a response to that. It whispered its words and she wanted to ignore them, but was forced to listen.
But I know his chest, it sounded. I know every curve of his face. I know the slight slant of his lower lip and I know the taste of his mouth. I know how his hands can move me, how they crave me and lets me know it... how they rule my skin...
"Stop," she interrupted herself.
He had been wrong in what he had said. She had never not dared to face the darker part within her. She had been thrown into the fact of it when Faith came into spice up the boil of the former's already mixed up life. Back then she had seen the power of that darker side of herself, she had seen it in Faith's eyes the night she killed a human and never gave it a second thought... That moment had been when the Slayer had made the final decision, outruling any other, that she would never let herself come to that. Not ever.
But with him inside of her... something roared. Something clawed at her. And so he had also been right, because once again she was standing face to face with a side of herself that she had written off as retracted, overcome. A side that was weak before temptation, which didn't frown upon the wrongs of what being with him dredged up, which felt no sorrow or regret and which kept falling into pure surrender in his presence.
Once again she had to beat it down within herself.
She was so sick of it. So tired of it. She wanted it gone already. She couldn't let it get any stronger, it had already made her give in once and if it happened one more time she was certain it would take that as encouragement to fight for its existence.
I'm creating some kind of pseudo-schizophrenia in my mind for myself, she mused, shaking her head at herself. I think it's time we made this official and just dragged me off to a padded cell. Well, it might be a good solution... she added with a sigh, reaching campus grounds and starting toward her dorm.
And why was she so sensitive to what he said anyways? It wasn't like she needed to put any weight to the words. He was just some shell of a vamp that had tried to kill her a few times, nothing more. So, she had screwed that shell until she almost could have sworn that she had sensed its heart beating in perfect sync with her own. And that shell had been able to...
Buffy, she warned herself. Buffy. It's Spike, is what it is.
As if she could ever forget that...
She walked over the lawn stretching before her dormatory, her pace had slowed down and she stepped up the few steps there was as she reached the front door. Putting her hand on the chilled knob she tried to get her head back on straight.
"Buffy," his voice sounded to her left and she spun around, ready to take a blow and even more prepared to deliver one.
"Spike, what the hell?!" she exclaimed as he took a hesitant step forward.
The shadow which the large obelisk - in which they were standing before the doors - created was barely enough for him not to be burned by the golden rays of the sun, but it seemed to be enough since he made no effort to pull back into the darker parts again.
He looked at her and felt a wave of insecurity wash over him. He never felt insecure and the fact that he did made him feel even more uncertain as to what he had come to do being what he actually should be doing. She'd think him nuts for sure after this.
She was growing impatient, he could see that on her posture, and so he should probably make it quick and painless. Though he didn't know where to start and so he simply eyed her in search for a way to begin.
Her brow slowly furrowed.
"Well, did you come to ogle me and stand there gaping or did you have some evil scheme in mind? Am I in on it this time, are you trying to put thoughts in my head now or what? Pictures? Vivid ones of my pending doom? Trying to scare me?" she asked and he blinked, getting a hold on the excuse for a wanker that he was becoming - shuddering at the mere thought - and about to answer when she added: "God, could you BE any more aggravating?!"
Turning from him she put her hand on the knob of the door and was just about to clear her way inside when he spoke.
"I'm sorry."
It was a hushed murmur, but she picked up on it as though it had its very own beacon and her eyes grew slightly. Her motion was put on hold and she stood very still before she carefully turned back to face him.
"What?" she asked, tone incredulous as she observed him and he let hear a very low growl, resting his eyes in hers.
"I said: I am sorry," he developed his sentence and she could detect the undertone of sarcasm this time, which made her irritated again.
"For what?" she wanted to know and he gave her a look.
Knowing that he might as well go the whole nine yards now that he had bloody well begun to trot down the first few he humored her.
"I was out of line," he replied. "And I wanted to...apologize."
She smiled, seemingly very unimpressed.
"What do you want?" she asked.
"What I 'want'?" he asked back and she nodded.
"Yes," she answered slowly. "You didn't think I'd actually believe that you came here purely for the enjoyment of hearing me grant you forgiveness for something I'm not even sure what it is, did you?" she then inquired and he sighed, rolling his eyes to the sky above and shaking his head.
"What is it with you, Summers?" he wondered, turning his gaze back in hers. "No matter what anyone ever does, it's never sodding enough, is it? You just want a bigger piece and when you can't get it you try to slice it off the only way you know how: with violence. Doesn't matter to you if it's verbally or physically, as long as it gets the job done."
She smiled a bitter smile at that.
"Why did you come here?" she demanded and he took another step forward.
"I came to say that what I said back there..." he trailed off as she looked up at him.
Her eyes caught his and something swirled deep down within him that made him draw a small breath of the evening air. He felt the on the brink to maddening need to just reach out and touch her, she was so close. Not able to fight the urge he reached up his left hand and slid it over her blonde locks.
Her eyes grew a little.
That touch was too soft to be him... What was he doing?!
His hand seemed to grab a tight hold on itself as it folded into a fist and dropped to rest at his side instead. She stared into his eyes and felt her heart beat a tad harder at the twirl of emotions she thought she could read in them: the surprise he felt himself at what he had just done, the anger that rose at the action, but also - somewhere deep down in those pools - a burning warmth of something hidden.
She took a small step back.
"You need to go," she said.
"Buffy..."
"Just go," she shook her head.
"You realize you completely blew this whole oh-I-sodding-forget act you've been pulling, don't you? With what you said to me back there," he asked and she closed her eyes for a short second and then opened them to look at him.
"Yes," she then replied. "Yeah, I do."
"So?" he wondered and she raised her eyebrows.
"So what?" she shot. "So, I remember. What does that change, Spike? Nothing. I still can't be around you, I don't want you around me, and as far as I'm concerned what happened down there... Well, it never happened."
"What about the kiss?" he asked and she took another step back as he took one forward.
"It was..." she tried, but he cut her off.
"I kissed you," he said and she swallowed, then pressed on an indifferent expression as she nodded. "And you definitely kissed me back," he added and she drew a breath as he stopped much too close to her. "And I'm still here."
"I've asked you to leave, you won't," she defended and a small smile graced his lips.
"You said that this was supposed to be our very last encounter," he pointed out and she sidestepped him before walking down the steps and onto the grass shadowed by the building. "You promised," he added, coming up to stand behind her and she once more turned to face him.
"Is it what you want?" she asked, reaching back and bringing out her stake. "Is that what you want?" she demanded as she stepped up to him, raising her arm and his body grew rigid tough he didn't even blink.
"You know what I want," he replied.
"No," she disagreed, lowering her arm and turning from him. "No, Spike. I don't know what the hell you want. You bully me, you ridicule me, you hate me, you seduce me..." she trailed off as she threw the stake in the grass before swirling around and beginning to pace before him.
He watched her.
"You're doing that Slayer walk again," he remarked and she glared at him. "Doesn't bode well."
"Shut up," she growled. "You think you're so smart, you think you're just the cleverest little vamp around, don't you? Then WHY can't you get it through your thick skull that I don't WANT this?!"
"Then what the bleeding hell DO you want?!" he suddenly burst out, taking the steps dividing them and she looked up at him as he stopped before her, his gaze ablaze with impatient fury. "You say you don't want this, that you don't want me - but everytime I look at you I can see what I do to you. Buffy, how you just kissed me... THAT isn't NOT wanting. That's being so bloody starved for it that you..."
"Don't even start!" she interrupted him. "It's not like that. This, you and me, it's nothing. Understand?! I'm in love with Riley! I love him!"
"Do you think I want your LOVE?!" Spike retorted with a snarl.
"I don't give a damn what you want!" she yelled, suddenly remembering where she was and lowering her voice as she added. "What I have with Riley is something you could never understand! He makes me happy and more importantly - I make HIM happy. And I can't keep doing this to him..."
"Doing what exactly?" Spike cut in and she bit her jaws together hard before she ignored his input and continued with:
"This is over. Right now. And I mean it, I don't wanna see you again."
"If that's what you need to tell yourself," he mumbled as she turned from him, walking back up to the double doors. "I know better," he added and she glanced at him before she pushed the right door open and proceeded inside.
***
5.23 p.m.
"What was that all about?" Willow wondered curiously as Buffy carefully closed the bedroom door behind her back.
The Slayer spun around at the sound of her voice, looking rather busted and Willow - seated on her bed - grew quizzical at the defensive posture the former was adopting. Then Buffy relaxed and shook her head.
"Never mind," she muttered, pulling her jacket off and walking up to her own bed to sit as well.
"I saw Spike," the Wicca said and Buffy threw herself backwards with a sigh.
"Mh-hmh," she murmured.
"And I saw you arguing with Spike," Willow continued.
"Yes," Buffy breathed tiredly.
"And I saw you taking a stake and almost poofing Spike," Willow finished her recap and Buffy grumbled.
"Almost," she then agreed silently.
"Buffy, is something going on that...?"
"I can't talk about this right now," Buffy cut her off, getting to her feet again and walking back up to the door. "I'm sorry, Wills. I just... I have to see Riley," she added, opening the door and stepping through it.
As she disappeared Willow sighed.
"Of course you do," she grumbled.
***
Day Twelve.
8.30 a.m.
"So, you really went through with it?"
Buffy looked up as she heard his voice, questioning, and the vamp took a step forward - the shadows slipping off him as though the ground was the floor of a stage, and the former were the curtain revealing its contents. His eyes glittered, blue and deep - the actor was stripped off him, he stood before her without any mask on, center stage before his one-woman audience. She stared at him in astonishment.
"Went through with what?" she finally asked and he smiled a small smile.
"I just wanna know, Buffy... Was it his touch you felt? Or was it mine?"
Her eyes grew.
She looked down at herself and realized that she was naked, that she was seated on a bed. Spike slowly approached her, slipping his duster off his shoulders as he went and then he stopped before her. His torso was bare and the moonlight sculpted his chest lovingly with its rays.
"I'm in love..." she tried, wanted those words to make the situation sensible to him, make him understand once and for all.
But her enemy's eyes, those hated orbs with their chilling gaze, softened beyond recognition at her words before he reached out his left hand and gently let it slide over her blonde locks.
"So am I," he whispered.
The dream slipped away the next instant and before she knew it she was slowly opening her eyes. She frowned, finding herself feeling misplaced and unable to conclude where the heck she was. Then it came to her: she was in a bed. The same bed that had been in her dream and...
Turning around with her heart in her throat she rested her gaze in Riley's.
"Hey," he said gently and she stared at him, at first not sure who he was, and then the pieces quickly created the puzzle of what had happened the night prior. "What's the matter?" he then asked, a small smile spreading over his lips as he added: "Weren't expecting to see ME?"
She smiled back, tentatively. Trying to battle back the lump in her chest as the dream seemed set on playing itself over and over in her head.
'I'm in love...'
'So am I...'
"I never know what to expect," she mumbled, still smiling a little, keeping the rumble of confusion within her off her face.
She looked at Riley, and ultimately succeeded in her quest. Pausing the dream she pushed the visual of it as far down as she possibly could get it. It didn't matter. It was her subconscious playing some warped prank on her. It was only a dream, for crying out loud. Nothing to get herself worked up over. No, nothing at all. Growing slightly serious she bent forward to give her lover a kiss.
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Oh, thank you SO much for your thoughts on that chapter and I'm so, so pleased to read that you enjoyed it! I have to go to work in fifteen minutes, but I wanted to get this up before that so I hope you liked this as well! I dunno if most of you get where in the line of episodes we are - but this has a small bit in it from "The I in TEAM." (All rights to David Fury, Joss Whedon and Co., of course.)
Special thanks to LizDarcy, Johanna, Alyssa, charisma1525, Renee', Haley, LILI, learyl, Heather, Pine and daphoid - thank you SOSOSO much for your everlasting encouragement! I'm so sorry this is so hasty but I have to get going! I'll be back though, to rectify my hurry, k?
Oh, and Heather - I'm really not at all sure how many more chapters there will be to this... It completely depends on how the story develops. I wanna write it for as long as you wanna read it, but then there is the fact of knowing when to stop and so I guess that comes down to me. ;) Okay, so the answer is it will keep going indefinitely, for now. :)
Thanks again! Your positivity keeps me going on this!
A.M.L, Annie.