Florabama
Disclaimer: See chapter one
AN: Sorry for the long delay in updating. Also their might be some profanity in this chapter due to the fact that well...face it... what rap song doesn't have swearing? And since they are in the South rap is very big down here, even white chicks like Kapies and I listen to it. Forgive me if I mess up any of the lyrics.
Kapies: We listen, we don't dance...but then again I have blackmail photos of you dancing-
AN: Which you will keep under lock and key under pain of death to your computer!
Chapter 5
After dragging the three human males inside, Katie managed to get them to eat their breakfasts. Kim sat happily in the computer room running a scan for any Mary Sue's in the area, and doing background checks on all Fan Fic author's with in a hundred miles. *AN: Efficient little thing isn't she? *
Kim noticed the silence and turned to see the Elves and Men giving her pointed looks while they ate their breakfasts. Kim smiled and opened Windows Media Player, turning her wall-mounted speakers on.
Everyone stopped eating, except Katie; being immune to Kim's evil ways, once music began to play.
" Oh my God, Becky look at her butt. It is so big! She looks like one of those rap guys girlfriends. But who understands those rap guys. They only talk to her because she looks like a total prostitute, okay. I mean her butt it's so big! I can't believe it so round, it's like out there, I mean gross.... look... she's just so blah!" Spoke a female voice, making all males present wonder why a female was talking about another female's posteriori.
Then came the shocker...
" I like big butts and I can not lie! You other brothers can't deny! When a girl walks in with an itty-bitty waist and a round thing in your face you get sprung! You wanna pull up tough cuz you notice that butt was stuff. Wanna be the G she's wearing, oh baby I wanna get with ya and take ya picture. My homeboys tried to warn me but that butt you got makes me so horny!"
Thranduil began to choke on his breakfast. The hobbits stared blushing. All others present except Kaite where shocked. Glorfindel was mortified to hear Katie humming to the song,
"Ooh round butt smooth skin! You say you wanna get in my bens! Well use me use me cuz you ain't that average groupie. I see her dancin'! To hell with romancin'! Sweat! Wet! Got it going like a turbo vet! I'm tired of magazines saying flat butts are the thing. An average girl with an ass like that, she gotta pack much back. So fellas! Yea! Fellas! Yea! does your girlfriend got the butt? HELL YEA! So shake it! Shake it! Shake it! Shake it! Shake that healthy butt! Baby got back!"
Eomer looked to see Kim singing along with the song.
"I like 'em round and big! And when I'm doing a gig I just can't help myself I'm acting like an animal, now here's my scandal. I wanna take you home and UH! Double up UH! UH! I ain't talking about playboy because silicon parts are made for toys! I want 'em real thick and juicie to find that juicie double! Mix-a-lots in trouble, begining for a piece of that bubble. I'm looking at rock videos! Knock-knee bimbos walking like hoes! You can keep those bimbos! I keep my women like Flo Jo! A word to the thick soul sisters I wanna get with ya. I won't cuss or hit ya, but I gotta be straight when I say I wanna ***** till the break of dawn baby got it going on! A lot of Cens won't like this song! Cuz those punks like to hit and quit it! I'd rather stay and play, cuz I long and I'm strong and I'm down to get the friction on!"
" So ladies! Yea! Ladies! Yea! You wanna role my Mercedes? YEA! Then turn around, stick it out, even white boys gotta shout baby got back! Baby got back! Yea baby when it comes to females Cosmo ain't got nothing to do with my selection! 36, 24, 36! Ha! Only if you five three! So your girlfriend grows a honda, playing work out tapes by fonda, but fonda ain't got a motor in the back of her honda. My anaconda don't want none unless you got buns hon! You can do side bens and sit ups, but please don't lose that butt! Some brothers try to play that hard role and tell you that the butt ain't gold. So they toss it and leave it, and I pull up quick to retrieve it. So Cosmo says your fat, well I ain't down with that. Cuz your waist is small and your curves are kickin' and I'm thinkin' 'bout sticking- To the bean poll dames in the magazines, you ain't it miss thing! Give me a sister, I can't resist her, Red Beans & Rice didn't miss her! Some knuckleheads try to dis, cuz these girls are on my list. He had game but he chose to hit 'em , and I pulled up quick to get with 'em. So ladies if the butt is round and you wanna XXX so down. Call one nine hundred Mix-a-lot and kick those nasty thoughts. Baby got back!"
" Little in the middle but she got much back! Little in the middle but she got much back!"
Then the song ended. Kim turned to see the looks of horror and revulsion on her Middle Earthian guests. " So you like it huh?"
Aragorn pulled out his sword, and for his second time on Earth, stabbed another piece of technology.
End of Chapter 5
Sorry this took so long. Hope you all enjoyed it. Ughhh still getting used to being back in school and trying to get job.
Disclaimer: See chapter one
AN: Sorry for the long delay in updating. Also their might be some profanity in this chapter due to the fact that well...face it... what rap song doesn't have swearing? And since they are in the South rap is very big down here, even white chicks like Kapies and I listen to it. Forgive me if I mess up any of the lyrics.
Kapies: We listen, we don't dance...but then again I have blackmail photos of you dancing-
AN: Which you will keep under lock and key under pain of death to your computer!
Chapter 5
After dragging the three human males inside, Katie managed to get them to eat their breakfasts. Kim sat happily in the computer room running a scan for any Mary Sue's in the area, and doing background checks on all Fan Fic author's with in a hundred miles. *AN: Efficient little thing isn't she? *
Kim noticed the silence and turned to see the Elves and Men giving her pointed looks while they ate their breakfasts. Kim smiled and opened Windows Media Player, turning her wall-mounted speakers on.
Everyone stopped eating, except Katie; being immune to Kim's evil ways, once music began to play.
" Oh my God, Becky look at her butt. It is so big! She looks like one of those rap guys girlfriends. But who understands those rap guys. They only talk to her because she looks like a total prostitute, okay. I mean her butt it's so big! I can't believe it so round, it's like out there, I mean gross.... look... she's just so blah!" Spoke a female voice, making all males present wonder why a female was talking about another female's posteriori.
Then came the shocker...
" I like big butts and I can not lie! You other brothers can't deny! When a girl walks in with an itty-bitty waist and a round thing in your face you get sprung! You wanna pull up tough cuz you notice that butt was stuff. Wanna be the G she's wearing, oh baby I wanna get with ya and take ya picture. My homeboys tried to warn me but that butt you got makes me so horny!"
Thranduil began to choke on his breakfast. The hobbits stared blushing. All others present except Kaite where shocked. Glorfindel was mortified to hear Katie humming to the song,
"Ooh round butt smooth skin! You say you wanna get in my bens! Well use me use me cuz you ain't that average groupie. I see her dancin'! To hell with romancin'! Sweat! Wet! Got it going like a turbo vet! I'm tired of magazines saying flat butts are the thing. An average girl with an ass like that, she gotta pack much back. So fellas! Yea! Fellas! Yea! does your girlfriend got the butt? HELL YEA! So shake it! Shake it! Shake it! Shake it! Shake that healthy butt! Baby got back!"
Eomer looked to see Kim singing along with the song.
"I like 'em round and big! And when I'm doing a gig I just can't help myself I'm acting like an animal, now here's my scandal. I wanna take you home and UH! Double up UH! UH! I ain't talking about playboy because silicon parts are made for toys! I want 'em real thick and juicie to find that juicie double! Mix-a-lots in trouble, begining for a piece of that bubble. I'm looking at rock videos! Knock-knee bimbos walking like hoes! You can keep those bimbos! I keep my women like Flo Jo! A word to the thick soul sisters I wanna get with ya. I won't cuss or hit ya, but I gotta be straight when I say I wanna ***** till the break of dawn baby got it going on! A lot of Cens won't like this song! Cuz those punks like to hit and quit it! I'd rather stay and play, cuz I long and I'm strong and I'm down to get the friction on!"
" So ladies! Yea! Ladies! Yea! You wanna role my Mercedes? YEA! Then turn around, stick it out, even white boys gotta shout baby got back! Baby got back! Yea baby when it comes to females Cosmo ain't got nothing to do with my selection! 36, 24, 36! Ha! Only if you five three! So your girlfriend grows a honda, playing work out tapes by fonda, but fonda ain't got a motor in the back of her honda. My anaconda don't want none unless you got buns hon! You can do side bens and sit ups, but please don't lose that butt! Some brothers try to play that hard role and tell you that the butt ain't gold. So they toss it and leave it, and I pull up quick to retrieve it. So Cosmo says your fat, well I ain't down with that. Cuz your waist is small and your curves are kickin' and I'm thinkin' 'bout sticking- To the bean poll dames in the magazines, you ain't it miss thing! Give me a sister, I can't resist her, Red Beans & Rice didn't miss her! Some knuckleheads try to dis, cuz these girls are on my list. He had game but he chose to hit 'em , and I pulled up quick to get with 'em. So ladies if the butt is round and you wanna XXX so down. Call one nine hundred Mix-a-lot and kick those nasty thoughts. Baby got back!"
" Little in the middle but she got much back! Little in the middle but she got much back!"
Then the song ended. Kim turned to see the looks of horror and revulsion on her Middle Earthian guests. " So you like it huh?"
Aragorn pulled out his sword, and for his second time on Earth, stabbed another piece of technology.
End of Chapter 5
Sorry this took so long. Hope you all enjoyed it. Ughhh still getting used to being back in school and trying to get job.