Chapter two, part 1: Just Let Me Cry
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Don't Know why
Why you got to have a reason
To Be Lost
Inside
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Things went on the same way for the next three weeks, until late one night, Lily came into the common room after a particularly disgusting detention with the potions master, Professor Edmonton, and sat down by the fire to think.
She thought about her sister's hatred towards her, she thought about finding about Petunia's wedding through her mother, two days //after// her sister had married, she thought about the Slytherin's prejudice and cruelty toward her for being muggle born...Soon, Lily had tears pouring downs her face, with out realizing she was crying.
'Petunia hates me being a witch...Others hate me for being muggle born...I just can't do anything right anymore, can I?' She thought.
Next to her, Lily, heard a rustling noise, and almost immediately, James Potter materialized in front of her, and for the first time in her life, she didn't want him to be gone.
"Lily??" He knelt in front of the couch where she was curled up. "What's wrong??"
"Nothing," she said, wiping away her tears.
"Something's wrong. You don't have to tell me what, but do you want me to stay??" He suggested quietly, and gently.
"No. Just go away, Potter. Leave me alone, I don't want you here."
"Yes, you do. I can tell you're lying."
"How??"
"The emerald in your eyes gets duller every time you lie."
"No, it doesn't," Lily denied, and suddenly burst into a fresh wave of tears.
"That's it, I'm staying here with you," James stated, summoning a blanket from upstairs. He laid on the couch, half supported by pillows against the armrest, and motioned for Lily to come sit with him.
Lily walked over, and laid down next to James, facing him. James let the blanket drop down on both of them.
"I'm going to get your robes all wet," Lily said, laughing half heartedly.
"Doesn't matter," James reassured, "Do you want to tell me what wrong??"
"Not really, but I will."
"You don't have to if you don't want to."
"It's alright. I need to get it out," Lily said, and told him everything from the beginning, starting when Lily received her Hogwarts letter, and Petunia didn't, until the end, to that moment.
"This is the first time I've ever seen you cry," James said.
"It's the first time I've cried in over five years. James, why did you do this??" She asked.
"Why did I do what??"
"You know, stay here with me, listen to my problems. Our friends aren't around, so we don't have to be nice."
"I don't know. I guess I've been in the same situation as you were in."
"What's that??" Lily questioned.
"Having problems with no one to listen to them."
"Oh. You can tell me if you want," Lily told him.
"I don't think I can. At least, not yet," James said.
"I understand," Said Lily, and she did understand.
"Well, I'd better get up to bed. Thanks again," she said.
"Yeah, good night," The two got up and walked to wear the boys and girls dormitories separated, and Lily did something just as unbelievable as telling James Potter her troubles and worries.
She reached up and gave him a hug. It was a loose one, but James encircled Lily's waist with his arms, and tightened the hug.
When they broke the hug, the two still stayed close together, entranced by the other. Quickly, surprising himself, James leaned down and pecked Lily on the lips, nothing else. When James took his head back, both were standing with wide eyes, waiting only a split second before both leaned in for a deep kiss.
Halfway through, they realized in unison what they were doing. They were kissing the enemy. Lily broke away first, and said, "I have to go now."
"Yeah, me too," James replied.
They hurried off to their separate dormitories, not believing what they'd just done.
Chapter 2 part 2: Ironic
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Isn't it Ironic
Dontcha think??
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James hurried up to his room, met by the site of Peter, Remus, and Sirius sitting on Remus' bed, playing Exploding Snap by candlelight.
"Hey, Prongsie!" Called Sirius. "Where've you been?? Snogging some Hufflepuff girl in a closet??" James was almost as bad as Sirius, only he waited at least //two// days before dumping one girl for another.
"Leave me alone, Sirius," James said solemnly, heading towards his bed.
"Ah, come one, James. Who was it?? Maria?? Anita?? Jessica??" Sirius kept taunting.
"Sirius, just leave me alone!" James said fiercely, pulling the curtains on his four poster bed closed, laying down looking up at the ceiling, thinking about what happened downstairs.
Sirius finally realized that James was serious, and knocked on the wooden post at the head of the bed, "Hey, Prongs, I'm sorry. I didn't realize you were so upset. Want to talk or something??"
"Come in, Padfoot, but just you. No offense, Wormtail, Moony."
Peter and Remus understood that James had a different bond with Sirius. They'd been friends since early childhood, and both knew Prongs would share what ever he was telling Sirius in due time.
Inside the curtains of the four poster, James placed a silencing charm on the bed.
"So what happened, James??" asked Sirius, frowning.
"I kissed her."
"Kissed who??"
"Lily."
"Oh, shite," said Sirius quietly. "How did that happen??"
"I found her pretty upset in the common room, and we sat together and talked for almost four hours. When we got up to go to bed, she reached up and hugged me. Then, it happened."
"Did she kiss back??"
"Yeah," James gave a tiny, miniscule smile, and nodded.
"And did you like it??"
"Who wouldn't like kissing her?? I mean, it's //Lily Evans// Sirius, how many guys can say they've kissed her??" Lily rarely dated, although she was asked out a lot, she denied. Getting a date, let alone a kiss, from her was a very special thing.
"Not many. Do you like her??"
"No! Of course not!"
"So then why'd you kiss her??"
"I don't know, Sirius, I don't know. All I know is I'm scared. I don't think I like Lily, but I've never felt this...I don't know...feeling about a girl before."
"Like your stomach is full of squirmy things, you feel like screaming, and you can feel the scream building up in your throat, only a good kind of scream?? And when you look at her, your heart is pounding like you've just ran twelve kilometers, and at the same time, being wrenched out by the thought that there's a chance you'd never have her, no matter how small the chance??" Sirius got a distant look on his face.
"Exactly. And yet, I don't like her. Not one bit!"
"I understand."
"How did you know how I was feeling?? Basically, you described it perfectly, do you feel like this about someone??"
Sirius automatically came out of his 'dream world,' and exclaimed, "No, never!"
"Okay..." James could tell Sirius wasn't telling him something, but decided that he would find out at the right time.
"Now tell me, are you absolutely sure you don't feel the tiniest bit of like for Lily??"
"Not the tiniest bit."
"You're lying," Sirius accused.
"How can you tell??"
"The brown in your eyes gets duller every time you lie..."
Chapter 2, part three: I just can't help myself
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iI Just can't help myself I'm falling in love with you.../i
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When Lily returned to her dorm room, she was bombarded with questions.
"How was detention??"
"Where were you?? Detention ended hours ago!"
"Why do you look so dazed??"
Lily made her way towards the bathroom, and left the door open as she splashed cold water on her face.
"So??" Lily turned around to find Lorrena leaning against the door frame.
"Come in, and I'll tell you," Lily said.
Like Remus and Peter, Arabella and Misty knew that if it was important, they would know about it when they were meant to.
Lorrena entered the bathroom, shutting the door behind her.
"What happened??"
"He kissed me..."
"Who?" realization dawned on Lorrena. "Oh...oh no..."
"Yes, he did! And I have no idea what to do about it!"
"Tell me you didn't kiss back," Lorrena pleaded.
"I did."
"Do you like James??"
"I don't like him, but I don't really hate him. I don't even really like him as a friend. What else is there?" Lily pondered, naively. "We talked for a long time, he even held me when I cried. James didn't make fun of me once tonight. I just had this strong feeling when he leaned in towards me, and it got stronger as the kiss went on. And now, I still feel it, only it's like a dull throbbing. What's going on with me, Rena?" Lily explained.
"I don't know...but this feeling...is it like your stomach is twisting and turning, you feel like shouting, and you can feel the shout just building up in your throat, only a good kind?? And when you look at James, your heart is pounding like you've just ran twelve kilometers, and at the same time, being wrenched out by the thought that there's a chance you'd never have him, no matter how much you try??
"Exactly! How did you know??"
"Oh, lucky guess. You okay now??"
Lily nodded, and the two best friends hugged.
"Come on, let's get to sleep."
Disclaimer: I do not own anything, but Lorrena, and what has now become twelve cents. Tanner, who can be a total idiot, but also very, very sweet, owns Sirius's speech. JKR owns everything you recognize, except the names of the chapter parts, "Just Let Me Cry" by Ashlee Simpson, "Ironic" by Alanis Morissette, and "I Just Can't Help Myself" by Nobody's Angel. The chapter title from chapter 1 is "Pretend To Be Nice" from Josie and the Pussycats.
A/N: I MADE MYSELF CRY!!! I kinda hope I made someone else cry, but then again, I cry during hunting season...Also, I was very depressed when I wrote this...I'd just found out I have gym first period... Well, I have dance in about 3 hours, so maybe I should sleep, huh??
