***********************************TRApPeD**********************************
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Twenty-Eight: Encore!
By Annie
2003-05-07
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Day Twenty-Six.
9.44 a.m.
When the crypt had begun to fill with restrained light the Slayer and the Vamp had both been fast asleep.
Now Buffy woke with effort - since she had only slept five hours and her eyelids weren't exactly working with her. Her cheek rested comfortably against his shoulder, her left hand was on his chest and his arm was around her, holding her to him.
She moved her head to gaze lazily up at him, then she smiled a small smile before she pulled herself up and nestled her face against the side of his throat.
Sleep, however, proved just as fickle as his character as it eluded her with the speed of the light stroking the walls of the room from outside; longing to claim another easy target, knowing it would not.
Her eyes shot open and she got herself into a seated position faster than you can say I-love-American-Pie. Swinging her legs over the side of the sarcophagus - thinking how strange it was that she wasn't completely broken from head to toe, given the sleeping arrangements. Sitting up the next second had her groaning with pain from the ache as it made itself known throughout her limbs, and she shook her head at herself as she slid off the sheet covered stone and stood on both feet.
What are you doing here? she muttered to herself in her mind.
Spike drew a deep breath behind her, easing his eyes open as she glanced over at him before walking up to the foot of the artifact on which he was still lying. He met her gaze close to dreamily as a much too contented smile spread over his lips.
"Hey, baby," he greeted, voice close to a purr and she huffed, reaching down and grabbing a second sheet, which lie tangled at her feet.
Wrapping it around her she grumbled:
"I can't BELIEVE I fell asleep. God, what time is it? Oh, damn it."
Stumbling up to the armchair she reached down and grabbed her sweater off the floor, straightening her back his arms glided around her and the feel of them made her close her eyes. Biting her lower lip she furrowed her brow and then squirmed, as though she actually wanted release from him - which she didn't.
"Where you going?" he mumbled, burying his nose in her locks and against the back of her head.
She shivered as his hands slid over her stomach, the sheet not protection enough from how badly she already wanted to turn around and...
Oh, no. No, no. Nonono. No. You've spent one minute in his... very close vicinity and you're already sweating? Come on!
She cleared her throat, opening her eyes and stepping away from him. Though it didn't make him remove his hold, he merely followed and then pulled her close again. His mouth finding a spot to the left of her neck it just had to kiss and she bit her lower lip hard enough to draw blood as her knees began to grow weak.
"Where'd you think you're going?" he semi-repeated his previous question, murmuring.
"Out... Home... To school," she sighed, tilting her head back as his lips kept exploring already familiar enough skinscape. "Spike," she then protested, turning her head to look at him over her shoulder.
She really shouldn't have. His lips abandoned their journey and met hers right before he deepened the kiss. She kissed him back with the fever beginning to burn a hole through her thoughts, turning around to link her arms around his neck, pressing herself to him. Their tongues danced languorously and the sheet graced the floor as Spike tugged it down.
"I have to..." she tried; mouth still to his and he nodded.
"I know," he assured, wrapping his arms around her and lifting her as he carried her to the armchair.
"I can't..." she once more attempted an objection, but he merely sat down on the piece of furniture, making her straddle him and as he entered her they both drew a sharp breath.
"I know," he moaned, deepening the kiss again and she began to move her hips, riding him slowly.
His hands moved up her back and she pulled her mouth from his as her pace grew slightly harder, his lips connecting with the skin below the base of her throat and her breathing was growing heavier. Running her hands through his hair she leaned her head back as he captured one of her nipples with his mouth.
She was already close, and when she turned her head to look down at him as he looked up at her the dazed expression in his eyes showed her that he was too. Keeping eye contact the buildup began, increasing as they practically stared at each other and then his hands clasped her waist and her fingers grabbed fists of his hair, their eyes growing being the only testament to the coursing pleasure running through them.
She had been holding her breath without realizing it. Now she released it, exhaling silently as her gaze still rested in his. A smirk grew onto his lips and she felt a twitch of anxiety at the sight of it; an anxiety she couldn't place the reason for. With it came a swirl of well-known annoyance and she patted it welcomingly on the head as she gave him an impatient scowl and pulled away from him. He made a face as he glided out of her and then he sighed, leaning back as he put his hands behind his head and watched her pull on her panties.
"I think you bloody well could," he remarked, receiving a glare from her which had him raise one eyebrow questioningly.
"Don't talk to me. Don't look at me. Don't even TRY to manipulate me," she replied, pulling her pants on and zipping them up before buttoning them, looking for the place where she had dropped her sweater.
"Manipulate you?!" he wondered innocently as he rose to his feet. "I'm bloody offended here, Slayer," he then stated, grabbing her wrist as she wanted to walk up to the sweater lying a few feet away on the floor and making her face him as he added: "No, really... That hurts."
She ground her teeth, not willing to meet his gaze again, but even more unwilling to show such a clear sign of weakness. And so she did look up and her heart began to beat harder in her chest. What was it? What did he have that enabled him to do this to her?
"I don't CARE," she huffed, wringing her wrist free and walking away from him.
Picking up her sweater she pulled it on and looked around to make sure that she hadn't forgotten anything. Coming to the conclusion that she hadn't she swirled around and took a step toward the door when he said:
"Don't go."
Her heart jumped. She swallowed; then faced him slowly. He was three feet away and glorious in appearance. But she couldn't listen to him. Her mind disregarded that and she found herself asking:
"Why?"
He smiled a little.
"The eternal question," he said.
"Ever wonder why it's the lasting kind?" she retorted meaningfully and the smile grew into a smirk before he replied:
"'Cause it's IN every sodding question, perhaps?"
At that she couldn't help but smirk as well, then she grabbed a hold on herself and shook her head.
"I can't stay," she said and he cocked an eyebrow.
"Why?" he asked, emphasis on the word and she smiled again.
Killing it off she decided to really stop encouraging him and just get herself the hell out of there. What was he doing, acting all... the way he was acting?! Making her all... relaxed. She didn't want to be relaxed. She wanted to be on the edge around him. Expecting him to... do stuff. Bad stuff. Not baaad stuff as in being a much too great kisser or having some sort of magic in his touch that made her so badly need to be near him. No, the evil kind of bad. The dark, scheming, untrustworthy kind of bad that she had always associated with him.
WOULD always. No past tenses, none at all.
What's WRONG with me?! she asked herself, granting him another glare.
He tilted his head to one side as he eyed her closely. She clenched her jaws together.
"I can't stay 'cause... I can't," she answered him, taking another step forward and this time he did as well, making her stop and turn back to him.
"Not good enough," he said and she gave him a look before taking the last few steps to the door and once again he slipped his arms around her from behind.
"You think this'll work twice?" she asked, hating the close to teasing undertone in her voice, despising how she was already failing in staying strong. "Spike..." she mumbled. "Let me go."
He bit his lower lip, trying to keep himself from saying anything that could possibly lead her to believe that there was more to all of this than he would ever admit. But he was beaten down by the probability of her leaving unless he could produce a good enough reason for her to stay...
As if that would ever happen.
All right then. A good enough WAY of MAKING her stay.
"And then what?" he asked quietly, fighting back the very real longing behind every word he then continued: "Will you come back?"
"Why? You want me to?" she asked and he smiled.
"Now, don't get any bloody ideas in that pretty little head of yours," he replied, letting her go for putting his hands on her shoulders and turning her around, making her look into his eyes.
She raised her eyebrows.
"Whatever would those ideas be?" she wondered and his smile widened.
"I don't WANT you around, I just HAVE to have you around," he answered and she smiled tentatively as well.
"Funny," she then said sarcastically.
"Thought you'd deliver a 'why'," he pointed out and her smile turned into a smirk.
"Fine. Why?"
He stepped closer, leaned forward and kissed her. As he pulled away she opened her eyes and shook her head. He gave her a questioning look.
"Not good enough," she stated and he moved his arms around her, pressing her to him as he joined their lips again; deepening the kiss as she wrapped her arms around his neck and returned the kiss passionately.
Damn it, Buffy!
Moving her head back she shook it.
"I have to..." she mumbled again and this time he finished the sentence for her with:
"Stay. You have to stay. All day. With me."
She shook her head again, opening her eyes and resting them in his as she said:
"You know I can't."
"YOU know you won't," he muttered.
"So stop trying to make me," she murmured, pushing herself out of his arms and taking a step back.
"'Trying to make you' would be chaining you to the wall," he replied, licking his lips as his gaze drifted down her clothed form before he added: "I'm all for bondage, love... but right now I just wanna get to know you better."
Her eyebrows rose high at that, her eyes in his as he stepped up to her again.
"What's that supposed to m-..." she began, and then his left hand moved her hair away from her shoulder and he leaned forward, trailing the soft skin of it with his mouth for the second time that morning, and for the second time her knees were betraying her.
His hands were gliding behind her back and up her spine, her own - in an involuntary reflex - placing themselves softly on his upper arms.
"But... you already know me too well," she murmured and his movements stopped.
"Is that right?" he asked quietly and she swallowed hard, her heart beating heavily.
"Yes," she then whispered.
"And is that the real reason for your hasty exit?" he asked, voice still lowered as he pulled himself up to face her, still having her in his arms.
She stared up at him; her expression so open it took his non-existing breath away, then a veil fell over it as she got herself out of his embrace, saying:
"My time's up."
"Well, then I bloody demand an encore!" he disagreed and she suppressed the smile successfully this time, simply shook her head. "Buffy," he pleaded as she walked up to the door. "Stay with me."
"What's the use?" she asked, glancing back at him. "Really?"
He had no answer, no clever comeback. He could only watch her as she left, his heart sinking at the sight of the empty doorway.
***
12.15 p.m.
How could she have given in?
She was furious with herself, and still she couldn't seem to restrain herself from smiling a small smile whenever she thought of the previous night. She felt so good now; better than she had in such a long time. The tension was relieved and she felt as though she could finally breathe. That, however, was changed every two seconds when she realized who it was that was able to make her feel this way...
Spike.
Why couldn't she just delete him from her mind? Why couldn't she get him off it; out of it? He was this on-going static which just seemed set on disrupting any train of thought she might have. For better or worse it seemed some part of her had decided to make him a permanent resident of her head and it didn't matter how much she shook it to get him out of there.
She finished her lunch and threw the paper from the sandwich away in a nearby trashcan, getting to her feet and grabbing the paper cup still partially filled with lukewarm coffee before she walked out of the café and toward the college.
Glancing at her wristwatch she realized that her next class was three minutes from starting and she picked up her pace.
***
12.38 p.m.
Spike sat back in the armchair, trying to watch "Passions", but finding himself only able to reminisce of what had happened between him and the Slayer. Between Buffy and him... Between him and her. Between them.
The things she did. The things she let him do...
But where had the tenderness erupted from? Last night he hadn't been able to hold it back, to repress the still lingering yearning for her understanding, for her realization that something within him had been irreversibly touched by her and now he was too far gone to ever go back to what he had been...
Useless, he murmured to himself. This is all for bloody nothing, you sodding wanker, she'll never be yours. Take a good, hard look at yourself and be honest - you think that you couldn't kill again if you only got the buggering chip out? Come on, you long for it. You dream about it. That rush of blood pouring over your tongue, the sweetness of it. You crave it.
"No!" he exclaimed, at first not even realizing it had been his own voice which had said the word, and then his eyes grew.
What was he doing now? Denying his nature for that bitch? What the hell was he to her if not an easy lay... She didn't want him. She didn't need him. She'd probably scampered off to spend the bloody afternoon with Captain Cardboard. And what the sod did he care, anyways. It wasn't like his two blue eyes made them literal - he could still see perfectly well that what he was setting himself up for was a serious wake-up call.
And once the clock rang he was going to break free. He knew he would. And then there'd be no stopping him. He would leave Sunnydale with her dead, and...
He shook his head at himself. There was no way. He knew it. There was simply no way that that would ever happen.
He wanted the hope killed off. There was an eternal voice in the back of his head whispering of someday and what if and maybe and if she could only see...
She would never see! She would never want to see.
He closed his eyes and bit back the tears just as the door opened and he rose to his feet in startled surprise as he opened his eyes again and rested them in hers.
She had no clue as to what she thought she was doing, but as she was able to look at him she knew the decision had been the right one.
"Thought you had class," he grumbled and she nodded.
"I did. Couldn't concentrate," she replied and he blinked, unsure of what he should interpret this as.
"So you came here for some one-on-one?" he finally got out, the smirk he had planned only coming out half-heartedly as he was growing nervous in light of what she was really doing there.
She swallowed, her head buzzing with warnings and pushes in a hundred different directions and aspects of the situation with which she didn't want to deal right now. All that mattered was the way he was looking at her right then, right there... She hadn't realized how much she had wanted his eyes upon her ever since she left the crypt that morning - until now.
"Can you keep a secret?" she asked and he stared at her as she approached him. "Can you?" she repeated as she stopped before him and he nodded slowly. "Good," she mumbled as she stepped into him, wrapped her arms around his neck and stood on her toes; joining their lips and deepening the kiss forcefully.
This is the first step on a road which can only possibly lead to damnation and torment; you do realize that, don't you? the reasoning voice spoke up.
I'll take that road any day of the week, she retorted. If I can walk it with him...
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What joy it is, all of this. I can't think of anything nice enough to say to you so I'll just take it as it comes, k? ;) You rock, big time. You're the Alfa Romeo, Grand Canyon, double cheeseburger with everything, chocolate cake with whipped cream and melting vanilla ice-cream, grandest of all the grand people out there, best imitation of the earth on which we walk, ROCK! ;P Thank you!
Specialty, hugging thanks to Pin (I'm glad!) :), Juliya (hey, it's cool. I mean, you have your freedom of speech, girl! ;) Really happy it was "worth it" though and *lol* to that promise) ;), Renee' (oh, girl, you're so nice to me. I didn't mean to come off all cranky, but I'm really glad you saw it in your heart to reassure and encourage. Thanks a lot for that! I luv it that you luv it!) :), Von (hehe, thank YOU! Happyhappy!) ;), ello (hey, thanks for that, and for the understanding comment. I'm glad you like. Thanks for the tip!) :), Alyssa (oxo back, girl, and thanks for that! Thrilled you approve!) ;), Shaelune (a vote of confidence is always well received. *smile* Thanks, my friend!) ;), Mel (hehe, I'll try my best at the smacking and hey, it IS about frickin' time!!!) ;P, B_a_d (great!) ;), wolf116 (and I'm all for it! *licks her lips* We'll see about CC, k? *cackles*) ;), Julia (oh, boy, I really didn't wanna sound unappreciative of your criticism! I mean, I really DO appreciate it, totally. I need it! I just wasn't sure I thought it very constructively formulated. it felt more like a badgering - and I suppose that may have been my pride getting a thorn in its side, but you know! I just thought the "horrible" bit was a little overdone. :) Oh, and yeah.ahem, making up my own words I do agree is a big no-no. *blushes* Never fully thanked you for the awesome dedication of liking this story enough to actually read through the whole thing at once! That's just really great. And that comment about the storytelling WAS a light beam in your previous review, as well as this one, and I do say thanks a lot for that! Hope you're still approving!) :), Jen (ah, a kindred - and thanks!) Heather (*smiles widely*), charisma1525 (oh, thank you, thank you! And wow, thank you!) ;), Charlie (my friend, I trust all is well. Oh, no need to worry. *smiles* Life gets in the way sometimes! Grr life! And *LOL*! Well, just a bit.yeah.) ;), penmom (great with new names and thanks for great support! You so put words to what I go through and ain't it just the worst when you go blind like that? I really don't like it. Oh, I'd love to read some of your work! I just have a few to go through first, but I will surely, surely try to make it as fast as possible!) :), Pine (Perhaps, Perhaps, Perhaps is on my shelf and don't worry, I love it! I'll review it soon! And onto your review - I'm just so glad you're still liking! Well.I hope this was good as well. hehe) :) and last but not least Johanna (aw, I'm glad girl! Hope you did this as well!).
To all - LOVE and HUGS and TEDDY BEARS and ALL THE GOOD THINGS TO FALL UPON YOU WHEN YOU LEAST EXPECT IT, MOST DESPERATELY NEED IT AND that's it. ;)
Until next time, thank you and good night!
A.M.L, Annie.
Twenty-Eight: Encore!
By Annie
2003-05-07
**************************************************************************** *****
Day Twenty-Six.
9.44 a.m.
When the crypt had begun to fill with restrained light the Slayer and the Vamp had both been fast asleep.
Now Buffy woke with effort - since she had only slept five hours and her eyelids weren't exactly working with her. Her cheek rested comfortably against his shoulder, her left hand was on his chest and his arm was around her, holding her to him.
She moved her head to gaze lazily up at him, then she smiled a small smile before she pulled herself up and nestled her face against the side of his throat.
Sleep, however, proved just as fickle as his character as it eluded her with the speed of the light stroking the walls of the room from outside; longing to claim another easy target, knowing it would not.
Her eyes shot open and she got herself into a seated position faster than you can say I-love-American-Pie. Swinging her legs over the side of the sarcophagus - thinking how strange it was that she wasn't completely broken from head to toe, given the sleeping arrangements. Sitting up the next second had her groaning with pain from the ache as it made itself known throughout her limbs, and she shook her head at herself as she slid off the sheet covered stone and stood on both feet.
What are you doing here? she muttered to herself in her mind.
Spike drew a deep breath behind her, easing his eyes open as she glanced over at him before walking up to the foot of the artifact on which he was still lying. He met her gaze close to dreamily as a much too contented smile spread over his lips.
"Hey, baby," he greeted, voice close to a purr and she huffed, reaching down and grabbing a second sheet, which lie tangled at her feet.
Wrapping it around her she grumbled:
"I can't BELIEVE I fell asleep. God, what time is it? Oh, damn it."
Stumbling up to the armchair she reached down and grabbed her sweater off the floor, straightening her back his arms glided around her and the feel of them made her close her eyes. Biting her lower lip she furrowed her brow and then squirmed, as though she actually wanted release from him - which she didn't.
"Where you going?" he mumbled, burying his nose in her locks and against the back of her head.
She shivered as his hands slid over her stomach, the sheet not protection enough from how badly she already wanted to turn around and...
Oh, no. No, no. Nonono. No. You've spent one minute in his... very close vicinity and you're already sweating? Come on!
She cleared her throat, opening her eyes and stepping away from him. Though it didn't make him remove his hold, he merely followed and then pulled her close again. His mouth finding a spot to the left of her neck it just had to kiss and she bit her lower lip hard enough to draw blood as her knees began to grow weak.
"Where'd you think you're going?" he semi-repeated his previous question, murmuring.
"Out... Home... To school," she sighed, tilting her head back as his lips kept exploring already familiar enough skinscape. "Spike," she then protested, turning her head to look at him over her shoulder.
She really shouldn't have. His lips abandoned their journey and met hers right before he deepened the kiss. She kissed him back with the fever beginning to burn a hole through her thoughts, turning around to link her arms around his neck, pressing herself to him. Their tongues danced languorously and the sheet graced the floor as Spike tugged it down.
"I have to..." she tried; mouth still to his and he nodded.
"I know," he assured, wrapping his arms around her and lifting her as he carried her to the armchair.
"I can't..." she once more attempted an objection, but he merely sat down on the piece of furniture, making her straddle him and as he entered her they both drew a sharp breath.
"I know," he moaned, deepening the kiss again and she began to move her hips, riding him slowly.
His hands moved up her back and she pulled her mouth from his as her pace grew slightly harder, his lips connecting with the skin below the base of her throat and her breathing was growing heavier. Running her hands through his hair she leaned her head back as he captured one of her nipples with his mouth.
She was already close, and when she turned her head to look down at him as he looked up at her the dazed expression in his eyes showed her that he was too. Keeping eye contact the buildup began, increasing as they practically stared at each other and then his hands clasped her waist and her fingers grabbed fists of his hair, their eyes growing being the only testament to the coursing pleasure running through them.
She had been holding her breath without realizing it. Now she released it, exhaling silently as her gaze still rested in his. A smirk grew onto his lips and she felt a twitch of anxiety at the sight of it; an anxiety she couldn't place the reason for. With it came a swirl of well-known annoyance and she patted it welcomingly on the head as she gave him an impatient scowl and pulled away from him. He made a face as he glided out of her and then he sighed, leaning back as he put his hands behind his head and watched her pull on her panties.
"I think you bloody well could," he remarked, receiving a glare from her which had him raise one eyebrow questioningly.
"Don't talk to me. Don't look at me. Don't even TRY to manipulate me," she replied, pulling her pants on and zipping them up before buttoning them, looking for the place where she had dropped her sweater.
"Manipulate you?!" he wondered innocently as he rose to his feet. "I'm bloody offended here, Slayer," he then stated, grabbing her wrist as she wanted to walk up to the sweater lying a few feet away on the floor and making her face him as he added: "No, really... That hurts."
She ground her teeth, not willing to meet his gaze again, but even more unwilling to show such a clear sign of weakness. And so she did look up and her heart began to beat harder in her chest. What was it? What did he have that enabled him to do this to her?
"I don't CARE," she huffed, wringing her wrist free and walking away from him.
Picking up her sweater she pulled it on and looked around to make sure that she hadn't forgotten anything. Coming to the conclusion that she hadn't she swirled around and took a step toward the door when he said:
"Don't go."
Her heart jumped. She swallowed; then faced him slowly. He was three feet away and glorious in appearance. But she couldn't listen to him. Her mind disregarded that and she found herself asking:
"Why?"
He smiled a little.
"The eternal question," he said.
"Ever wonder why it's the lasting kind?" she retorted meaningfully and the smile grew into a smirk before he replied:
"'Cause it's IN every sodding question, perhaps?"
At that she couldn't help but smirk as well, then she grabbed a hold on herself and shook her head.
"I can't stay," she said and he cocked an eyebrow.
"Why?" he asked, emphasis on the word and she smiled again.
Killing it off she decided to really stop encouraging him and just get herself the hell out of there. What was he doing, acting all... the way he was acting?! Making her all... relaxed. She didn't want to be relaxed. She wanted to be on the edge around him. Expecting him to... do stuff. Bad stuff. Not baaad stuff as in being a much too great kisser or having some sort of magic in his touch that made her so badly need to be near him. No, the evil kind of bad. The dark, scheming, untrustworthy kind of bad that she had always associated with him.
WOULD always. No past tenses, none at all.
What's WRONG with me?! she asked herself, granting him another glare.
He tilted his head to one side as he eyed her closely. She clenched her jaws together.
"I can't stay 'cause... I can't," she answered him, taking another step forward and this time he did as well, making her stop and turn back to him.
"Not good enough," he said and she gave him a look before taking the last few steps to the door and once again he slipped his arms around her from behind.
"You think this'll work twice?" she asked, hating the close to teasing undertone in her voice, despising how she was already failing in staying strong. "Spike..." she mumbled. "Let me go."
He bit his lower lip, trying to keep himself from saying anything that could possibly lead her to believe that there was more to all of this than he would ever admit. But he was beaten down by the probability of her leaving unless he could produce a good enough reason for her to stay...
As if that would ever happen.
All right then. A good enough WAY of MAKING her stay.
"And then what?" he asked quietly, fighting back the very real longing behind every word he then continued: "Will you come back?"
"Why? You want me to?" she asked and he smiled.
"Now, don't get any bloody ideas in that pretty little head of yours," he replied, letting her go for putting his hands on her shoulders and turning her around, making her look into his eyes.
She raised her eyebrows.
"Whatever would those ideas be?" she wondered and his smile widened.
"I don't WANT you around, I just HAVE to have you around," he answered and she smiled tentatively as well.
"Funny," she then said sarcastically.
"Thought you'd deliver a 'why'," he pointed out and her smile turned into a smirk.
"Fine. Why?"
He stepped closer, leaned forward and kissed her. As he pulled away she opened her eyes and shook her head. He gave her a questioning look.
"Not good enough," she stated and he moved his arms around her, pressing her to him as he joined their lips again; deepening the kiss as she wrapped her arms around his neck and returned the kiss passionately.
Damn it, Buffy!
Moving her head back she shook it.
"I have to..." she mumbled again and this time he finished the sentence for her with:
"Stay. You have to stay. All day. With me."
She shook her head again, opening her eyes and resting them in his as she said:
"You know I can't."
"YOU know you won't," he muttered.
"So stop trying to make me," she murmured, pushing herself out of his arms and taking a step back.
"'Trying to make you' would be chaining you to the wall," he replied, licking his lips as his gaze drifted down her clothed form before he added: "I'm all for bondage, love... but right now I just wanna get to know you better."
Her eyebrows rose high at that, her eyes in his as he stepped up to her again.
"What's that supposed to m-..." she began, and then his left hand moved her hair away from her shoulder and he leaned forward, trailing the soft skin of it with his mouth for the second time that morning, and for the second time her knees were betraying her.
His hands were gliding behind her back and up her spine, her own - in an involuntary reflex - placing themselves softly on his upper arms.
"But... you already know me too well," she murmured and his movements stopped.
"Is that right?" he asked quietly and she swallowed hard, her heart beating heavily.
"Yes," she then whispered.
"And is that the real reason for your hasty exit?" he asked, voice still lowered as he pulled himself up to face her, still having her in his arms.
She stared up at him; her expression so open it took his non-existing breath away, then a veil fell over it as she got herself out of his embrace, saying:
"My time's up."
"Well, then I bloody demand an encore!" he disagreed and she suppressed the smile successfully this time, simply shook her head. "Buffy," he pleaded as she walked up to the door. "Stay with me."
"What's the use?" she asked, glancing back at him. "Really?"
He had no answer, no clever comeback. He could only watch her as she left, his heart sinking at the sight of the empty doorway.
***
12.15 p.m.
How could she have given in?
She was furious with herself, and still she couldn't seem to restrain herself from smiling a small smile whenever she thought of the previous night. She felt so good now; better than she had in such a long time. The tension was relieved and she felt as though she could finally breathe. That, however, was changed every two seconds when she realized who it was that was able to make her feel this way...
Spike.
Why couldn't she just delete him from her mind? Why couldn't she get him off it; out of it? He was this on-going static which just seemed set on disrupting any train of thought she might have. For better or worse it seemed some part of her had decided to make him a permanent resident of her head and it didn't matter how much she shook it to get him out of there.
She finished her lunch and threw the paper from the sandwich away in a nearby trashcan, getting to her feet and grabbing the paper cup still partially filled with lukewarm coffee before she walked out of the café and toward the college.
Glancing at her wristwatch she realized that her next class was three minutes from starting and she picked up her pace.
***
12.38 p.m.
Spike sat back in the armchair, trying to watch "Passions", but finding himself only able to reminisce of what had happened between him and the Slayer. Between Buffy and him... Between him and her. Between them.
The things she did. The things she let him do...
But where had the tenderness erupted from? Last night he hadn't been able to hold it back, to repress the still lingering yearning for her understanding, for her realization that something within him had been irreversibly touched by her and now he was too far gone to ever go back to what he had been...
Useless, he murmured to himself. This is all for bloody nothing, you sodding wanker, she'll never be yours. Take a good, hard look at yourself and be honest - you think that you couldn't kill again if you only got the buggering chip out? Come on, you long for it. You dream about it. That rush of blood pouring over your tongue, the sweetness of it. You crave it.
"No!" he exclaimed, at first not even realizing it had been his own voice which had said the word, and then his eyes grew.
What was he doing now? Denying his nature for that bitch? What the hell was he to her if not an easy lay... She didn't want him. She didn't need him. She'd probably scampered off to spend the bloody afternoon with Captain Cardboard. And what the sod did he care, anyways. It wasn't like his two blue eyes made them literal - he could still see perfectly well that what he was setting himself up for was a serious wake-up call.
And once the clock rang he was going to break free. He knew he would. And then there'd be no stopping him. He would leave Sunnydale with her dead, and...
He shook his head at himself. There was no way. He knew it. There was simply no way that that would ever happen.
He wanted the hope killed off. There was an eternal voice in the back of his head whispering of someday and what if and maybe and if she could only see...
She would never see! She would never want to see.
He closed his eyes and bit back the tears just as the door opened and he rose to his feet in startled surprise as he opened his eyes again and rested them in hers.
She had no clue as to what she thought she was doing, but as she was able to look at him she knew the decision had been the right one.
"Thought you had class," he grumbled and she nodded.
"I did. Couldn't concentrate," she replied and he blinked, unsure of what he should interpret this as.
"So you came here for some one-on-one?" he finally got out, the smirk he had planned only coming out half-heartedly as he was growing nervous in light of what she was really doing there.
She swallowed, her head buzzing with warnings and pushes in a hundred different directions and aspects of the situation with which she didn't want to deal right now. All that mattered was the way he was looking at her right then, right there... She hadn't realized how much she had wanted his eyes upon her ever since she left the crypt that morning - until now.
"Can you keep a secret?" she asked and he stared at her as she approached him. "Can you?" she repeated as she stopped before him and he nodded slowly. "Good," she mumbled as she stepped into him, wrapped her arms around his neck and stood on her toes; joining their lips and deepening the kiss forcefully.
This is the first step on a road which can only possibly lead to damnation and torment; you do realize that, don't you? the reasoning voice spoke up.
I'll take that road any day of the week, she retorted. If I can walk it with him...
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What joy it is, all of this. I can't think of anything nice enough to say to you so I'll just take it as it comes, k? ;) You rock, big time. You're the Alfa Romeo, Grand Canyon, double cheeseburger with everything, chocolate cake with whipped cream and melting vanilla ice-cream, grandest of all the grand people out there, best imitation of the earth on which we walk, ROCK! ;P Thank you!
Specialty, hugging thanks to Pin (I'm glad!) :), Juliya (hey, it's cool. I mean, you have your freedom of speech, girl! ;) Really happy it was "worth it" though and *lol* to that promise) ;), Renee' (oh, girl, you're so nice to me. I didn't mean to come off all cranky, but I'm really glad you saw it in your heart to reassure and encourage. Thanks a lot for that! I luv it that you luv it!) :), Von (hehe, thank YOU! Happyhappy!) ;), ello (hey, thanks for that, and for the understanding comment. I'm glad you like. Thanks for the tip!) :), Alyssa (oxo back, girl, and thanks for that! Thrilled you approve!) ;), Shaelune (a vote of confidence is always well received. *smile* Thanks, my friend!) ;), Mel (hehe, I'll try my best at the smacking and hey, it IS about frickin' time!!!) ;P, B_a_d (great!) ;), wolf116 (and I'm all for it! *licks her lips* We'll see about CC, k? *cackles*) ;), Julia (oh, boy, I really didn't wanna sound unappreciative of your criticism! I mean, I really DO appreciate it, totally. I need it! I just wasn't sure I thought it very constructively formulated. it felt more like a badgering - and I suppose that may have been my pride getting a thorn in its side, but you know! I just thought the "horrible" bit was a little overdone. :) Oh, and yeah.ahem, making up my own words I do agree is a big no-no. *blushes* Never fully thanked you for the awesome dedication of liking this story enough to actually read through the whole thing at once! That's just really great. And that comment about the storytelling WAS a light beam in your previous review, as well as this one, and I do say thanks a lot for that! Hope you're still approving!) :), Jen (ah, a kindred - and thanks!) Heather (*smiles widely*), charisma1525 (oh, thank you, thank you! And wow, thank you!) ;), Charlie (my friend, I trust all is well. Oh, no need to worry. *smiles* Life gets in the way sometimes! Grr life! And *LOL*! Well, just a bit.yeah.) ;), penmom (great with new names and thanks for great support! You so put words to what I go through and ain't it just the worst when you go blind like that? I really don't like it. Oh, I'd love to read some of your work! I just have a few to go through first, but I will surely, surely try to make it as fast as possible!) :), Pine (Perhaps, Perhaps, Perhaps is on my shelf and don't worry, I love it! I'll review it soon! And onto your review - I'm just so glad you're still liking! Well.I hope this was good as well. hehe) :) and last but not least Johanna (aw, I'm glad girl! Hope you did this as well!).
To all - LOVE and HUGS and TEDDY BEARS and ALL THE GOOD THINGS TO FALL UPON YOU WHEN YOU LEAST EXPECT IT, MOST DESPERATELY NEED IT AND that's it. ;)
Until next time, thank you and good night!
A.M.L, Annie.