Disclaimer: The talented Meg Cabot owns everything you recognize, and only the plot and the dude from the bookstore is mine! I make no money, so don't sue!
A/N: This chapter is kind of intense, just warning you. Some of you may hate it, in fact. But I hate these author's notes, so let's just get on with the story!! =o)
~*The Undoing of the Mediator*~
Chapter 15: Bring Me to Life
~*Suze*~
The edges of my vision began to fade…
"I told you…"
My mind spun
"…I don't lose, Jesse"
Thick redness surrounded me and I was thrust into a world of darkness…
swooooosshhhsh…
A gurgling noise filled my ears, like being underwater. I felt like I was floating, suspended in the air but unable to move or open my eyes. I couldn't feel anything in my body; it was completely numb. I just floated like that for awhile, my breathing somewhat labored as I tried in vain to open my eyes, trying to remember how I got here. Suddenly, my aching head smacked into something rock solid and I was once again thrown into darkness…
I awoke to find every muscle in my body throbbing with pain. It felt like I had been beaten with clubs by some huge football player over and over again, and then drove a knife into my heart and twisted it—hard. Blood coursed slowly and dully in my head, giving me the feeling that I was, once again, concussed. Only it was even worse than last time, when that skank Maria threw me off my roof into a hole. It was so bad that I couldn't even open my eyes without the fear that my head would split in half. And on top of that, I had no idea where I was. Perfect. In an attempt to figure out where I ended up, I tried to open my eyes but the world only spun in a blurry blob. My stomach rebelled against me, and I rolled over to get sick all over the ground, which usually doesn't happen to me when I'm concussed. The thing is, I can't even remember how I did it this time. Get a concussion, I mean. I blinked in an attempt to assess my somewhat desperate situation and found that I was lying on a deserted beach, the ocean was lapping up around my wet, sandy body.
I tried to pull myself up, but found it virtually impossible. My every instinct told me to stay put and fall asleep, but that was the last thing I needed. After a few more failed attempts, I decided that my best bet was to lie there and think about how this happened to me. I mean, where's Jesse? I called him, but nothing happened. That's strange. Usually he's here even before I think about him, but he wasn't showing up. I wracked my brain for possibilities as to where he could be, and pretty soon, vague thoughts were coming back from last night. I remember a boat, and Jesse, and a rope from something, but that's about it. There were red clouds and something shining…wait, red clouds? Now, I've seen clouds and all, but there's only one time you ever see blood-red clouds. An exorcism. The moment I thought that word every single memory came rushing back at me from yesterday. The kidnapping, Paul, Jesse, the fight, and my…my…death? I slowly lifted a hand and stared at a spectral glow in amazement. I was every bit a ghost.
~*Jesse*~
After what seemed like eternity, I was deposited on hard ground wrapped in fog. I knew only too well where I was, and it was the last place on earth I wanted to be. I looked around for the familiar ancient gatekeeper or the corridor, but none seemed in sight. There has to be a way out of here! I mean, what if someone's life was in danger? Surely they don't want more ghosts up here than they can handle. The fog spun in whirlpools around my legs as I started walking quickly in some random direction, praying that I would find some type of person, any person. The only thing was that I fel like I could hardly breathe, like my heart stopped beating and my brain stopped processing any emotion other than fear and angst. It was as if someone was taking one of those enormous pillows Susannah's mother bought for her room was smothering me, and all I could do was wonder what was happening.
My gaze wandered up to the sky, and noticed something I hadn't before. This was not the same place…at least I don't think. The sky in the Shadowland in highly distinct, it is a night sky unlike any ever seen, but this, this was more real. There were fewer stars, and even a moon shone brightly down at wherever I was standing. I tried to stop, only to realize that I couldn't. Something was pulling me, it was bringing me somewhere that I could not control. I figured that I might as well follow, mainly because there was no way for me to fight, and I kept stepping towards my unknown destination.
Apparently I had arrived. The walking I was forced to do suddenly ceased, and I looked around to see where I was. The most beautiful smell in the world hit my nose, like after a rain, but not as musty. All of a sudden particles began to form in front of me, resolving into a shape that never ceased to move. The particles were seemingly the smell, and they came from the sky, the fog, the earth. They were every bit of time, and space. I had no idea how I knew this, it just came to me like I knew it all along. It was as if I was finally coming home, after being in a cold, lifeless prison that was void of any emotion. My mind suddenly was registering a different feeling, one of hope. I watched this being, this creature come closer and a voice unlike any other entered my mind. It was really a voice, persay, but rather an understanding that came in words. The words, however, had emotions tapped onto them, like a lazy warm summer's day, or the howling of wolves at the shining moon, or even the waves of the ocean rolling onto a deserted shore.
Jesse… it said
Do you know why you're here?
"No, I don't even know where I am," I answered honestly.
Please, speak in your mind. It is harder for us to interpret human language.
Us? I asked, wondering was they (apparently) meant by that.
Yes, us. We are life itself, not God, but life. What you might interpret to be 'Mother Earth'. Strange term, we must admit. We are your experiences, your emotions, the ground you walk on, the air you breathe. We are even inside you.
My mind was spinning with this revelation, and I tried hard to grasp it. I'm still not quite sure where I am, I said in my head.
Alas, that is one question we cannot answer. It would be too much for you to comprehend, and that, among other things, cannot and will not ever be revealed to you.
So you aren't God? I asked, wondering what the other things were. I got my answer almost straight away.
That, too, we cannot reveal. If we gave you a straight answer, than Faith would not be Faith. It would be a fact, and Belief and Morality would not be tested because you would know that it is true. The shape kept shifting, and each particle emitted a different color, creating a spectrum before my eyes. It was a sight that would, if I had any, take my breath away.
Do you know why you're here, Jesse? It asked, posing the question in my mind.
I'm assuming it's because I was exorcised, I replied, my hands clasped tightly behind my back. The truth was, I had no idea how I should be acting around these things. It's not every day that you speak to the essence of life.
Mentally, the things shaked their heads. No, if you were exorcised you would be spending time with other ghosts in the Shadowland right now. The reason you were here, Jesse, is because you are meant to be on earth. You are the only ghost in the entire history of time that has chosen to forgo another life to save the soul of someone else. It has never been done before, and that single action assured us that you, are the one we've been looking for. Psychic mediums, if they can connect with us, are hardly ever wrong, and Susannah awhile ago was given information by one that to this day she has not forgotten. It is this: That she would have one love, one love for all of eternity and that she would never love another. She is meant for great things, Jesse, and she cannot do these things without love. Love is what drives us, and you, you Jesse, are the one she loves. You need to be there for her, not only to lead her to greatness and love her back, but to protect her. She will need it, and only too soon, we fear.
I stepped back in astonishment. Susannah loves me? And she will for all of eternity? I mean, I knew that she at least felt something for me, but I never knew that her emotions for me were anywhere even close to what I felt for her. As I was contemplating, the beings spoke again.
However, what we have just said must never be revealed to her, Jesse. She must do all this without ever knowing that she did it, otherwise she will be doomed to failure. And that is something that we cannot accept or allow. Do you understand? It demanded, its voice more serious every second.
Yes, I do, I replied, my tone matching theirs in seriousness.
Well, with that in mind, we must be getting you back to earth, they said, moving closer towards me. The particles and fog combined began to spin around me, moving faster and faster until they became a whirlwind of color, and I felt myself slipping from whatever dimension I was in into another, more familiar one.
My feet landed hard on the ground and I opened my eyes to see a deserted beach. Deserted except for one thing. Susannah lay by the water's edge, and I gasped in terror when I saw what she was. She was a ghost.
A/N: That was the longest chappie I've ever written...1700 words with no authors notes or review responses included!! I know it gets realty intense and all, but I hope you like it! PLEASE REVIEW!!!
And to my faithful reviewers:
cArEbEaR: 'Nombre de dios' is basically 'In the name of God', but literally in Spanish 'Names of gods'. I love when Jesse speaks Spanish!
Aida: Yeah, I'm just not a 'long chapter' kind of girl, I can only concentrate on one chapter for a short period of time; thius, short chappies. I make up for it in story length, though, right? Don't worry, though, I'm even depressing myself with this story, so it'll get happier (I think). Thanks for reviewing!
Nikki: That isn't a mistake, it was quite deliberate. The medallion isn't just any object, it is a ghost object and is unseen by humans, and therefore can dematerialize and materialize with the ghosts. But thanks for making sure I clarified that!
horsegrl8311: Thanks so much for your reviews! I'm glad you like this!
Aestas: Now THAT'S a thought…………put myself in the story and kick Paul's ass? Sounds like a plan!! Hehehe. I would, but I don't think I can write myself =o)
Hannirose: **Thinks** Perhaps you are the only one who gives me death threats…………they're just so much fun!!! **Laughs evilly** The only thing invented that can beat sporks is Jesse, hehehe. I just love leaving you hanging, cliffies are the best thing in the world to write!!
Firelady6: Yes, I know I'm evil at cliffies, but I'm sadistic like that =o)
Morgaine of Ithil: Thanks for playing the game, yo. It was supercool. You're actually (somewhat, kinda, um, right) on track! If you need clarification, just ask, dude! I came up with some ideas for your HP fic, if you want them!
Jackie723: HP is my second lover, so as long as Jesse's mine, I'm all good =o). Good guess with whats going to happen, though!
Lady Elizabeth: I'm hurrying! Lo siento, señorita!
Genies9: Yes, the tree would solve all my problems………and I like your thoughts!! Hoo-rah, thanks for the review (and I'm still wondering………)
ShadowKat: And if you don't update, there will be two very, very angry authors!! Mehehe, Orlando looks so hot in Pirates of the Caribbean, that's the only reason I'm going to see it!! =o)
Ndblue123: Hooray! I made someone angry!! Jk, jk. I thought it was a very good stopping place, no?
Ac_bworm: No offense taken! You really like the suspense and you think its interesting? THAT JUST MADE MY DAY!!!!! yeah, I tried to copy Meg's style at the beginning, but it totally wasn't me to be all crazy like that so about halfway through I slowly reverted to mine. And I know she wouldn't kill Suze, and that's why I did it. Because no one barely ever kills Suze. =o)
StrawberryMary: Wow………maybe I should update? Thanks for playing the game!!
AND THIS IS ANSWERING A QUESTION I GOT AWHILE AGO: Why are the windows open right after Suze loses her powers if Jesse is telekinetic and still around, not gone forever?
Answer: Yes, Jesse is still around, but he was rather preoccupied that night all the way until when Suze woke up with the evil Paul. So he wasn't there to close the windows and he was trying to stop Paul from hurting Suze. Closing the windows wasn't top on his mind =o)
MY NEW SONG (Goes to 'Mary Had a Little Lamb":
Summer wrote a little story,
A little story,
A little story.
Summer wrote a little story
And thought it would be cool if people reviewed!
Some of them did and it made her day
It made her day
It made her day
Some of them did and it made her day
So review and keep Summer HAPPY!