Warning: This is a slash fic.  That means it's based on a male/male relationship.  If you don't like that, don't read it.

Disclaimer: HP ain't mine.  If it were, the person who died in book five would still be very much alive.

Spoilers: Based very loosely off an event that is mentioned in passing in book five. But that's it, so I think you'll be ok, even if you haven't read The Order of the Phoenix.

Paring: Sirius/Remus  

A/N: My first slash fic! PLEASE R/R

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CHAPTER 1: AN UNEXPECTED INVITATION

"My God!"  Sirius exclaimed, squinting at the letter in his hand to make sure he had read it correctly.

          "What?" James asked, startled by his friend's sudden outburst.

          "My mother says I can bring a friend home for the Holidays," Sirius explained, a grin forming on his face.

          "Seriously?"

          "Seriously!" Tossing the letter across the table, Sirius picked up a piece of toast and began to eat it with a happy flourish.

          "That's awesome man!" James said, his grin matching Sirius's as he read over the letter. "But you know," he faltered, voice betraying disappointment, "I can't come.  I have to spend Christmas with my family."

          "Yeah…that's too bad," Sirius replied, also disappointed. But that disappointment was sort lived as his gaze quickly shifted to Remus. "What about it Moony? Fancy spending a couple weeks with me and my dear old mum?"

          Remus blushed slightly as he stammered, "I don't know…I mean…"

          "Aw come on, it's only two weeks, and there won't be a full moon while we're there."

          "Still…"

          "Sirius, I'll go with you," Peter cut in, his face filled with desperate hope, making him appear more pathetic than ever. Sirius's smile faltered as he shot an unhappy glance at Remus.  While Peter was a nice enough guy, spending two weeks alone with him wasn't Sirius's idea of an ideal holiday.  Plus Peter's utter lack of intelligence and love for whining wouldn't do much to improve his mother's already low opinion of him and his friends. 

          "Come on Remus," he pleaded. "It'll be fun.  And no one will find out you're a werewolf, I promise."

          "Well…fine," Remus said, giving in with a slight grin.

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          But that night he lay awake, eye's fixed on the sealing, mind in turmoil.  Sirius had misinterpreted his reasons for hesitation.  He had known that there wouldn't be a full moon, and honestly, thought that Sirius's family might find out what he was hadn't even crossed his mind.

          He rolled onto his side, eyes resting on Sirius, asleep in the bed next to his own.

          Sprawled across the bed shirtless, his head was turned away from Remus, but his profile was still visible, sharp nose and full lips lit by the moon as his long hair was swept gently across his face by a breeze coming from an open window.  He was beautiful.

          Remus's heart beat faster at the thought of spending two weeks with this perfection, just him and Sirius, no one else.

          Because it was not his werewolfness that had made him hesitate to go with Sirius, he had hesitated because the thought of spending two weeks alone with him was as terrifying as it was thrilling.

          And it was extremely thrilling.

Flipping onto his back again, he willed himself to get the sleep he so badly needed in the upcoming week of tests, unaware that Sirius was not, as he had assumed, asleep.

In fact, Sirius was wide awake, and just as frightened as Remus. 

Why couldn't James come? He thought, his internal voice shaking .  That would have been simple, we would have had fun—no complications. But Remus? O God, I've wanted this for so long—just to be able to spend time alone with him.  But what will it get me? Nights wishing we weren't just lying there asleep? Days pretending I only like him as a friend?

I can do it, he reasoned, I've been doing it since our second year…what is that, four years now? I can keep up the masquerade.  But--but I've always had James and Peter to fall back on, someone else to make conversation when I want to kiss him too badly to keep talking. He stirred restlessly, licking his dry lips with a sigh. I can keep pretending.  Even if it's just him and me. I can. But he wasn't sure if he believed it.   

          A/N: If you review, I will love you forever!  Constructive criticism is always welcome, though I would appreciate it if you didn't flame.